40. Faith
Ihad no idea what in the world Hudson was doing when he came charging at me like a linebacker intent to tackle me. But I certainly didn’t expect him to shove me.
The force of his attack sent me flying backward with no finesse, and I gasped in jolting pain as I landed on my ass. Asphalt bit into the flesh of my hands when I put them down in a lame attempt to catch myself, scraping through my palms brutally.
In front of me, the roar of a car rushed past so closely I could feel the heat from the engine as the air from its spinning tires fluttered my shirt around my frame.
The sound of crunching metal, breaking glass, and some kind of collision followed, then screeching tires.
Ignoring my own screaming pain, I scrambled to my feet to check on Hudson, only to find a body lying in unnatural angles in front of a Porsche that had slammed to a halt with its hood dented in and glass shattered in the windshield.
“Oh my God. Hudson!”
Unable to believe this was actually happening, I surged forward, forgetting my own pain as I raced to the fallen figure. But when I reached him, I found him twisted and broken, his eyes open as he stared up at the sky. He wasn’t blinking. He wasn’t moving.
He looked…dead.
Clutching my head, I just stood there for a moment, trying to function through the shock.
“Is he…?” a voice asked.
I glanced up to see the driver’s side door of the Porsche standing open and a horrified Genesis gaping over it as she blinked at Hudson’s body.
My eyes narrowed and my teeth gritted. “You—you did this?”
“I…” Her gaze flashed up to mine. “I was aiming for you.”
Yeah, that didn’t help anything.
“Well, don’t just stand there!” I screamed. “Get help.”
“Oh, fuck, no.” She immediately shook her head and dove back into her car. “I’m getting the hell out of here.” The door slammed shut, the engine revved, and Gen’s Porsche peeled out, her tires squealing as she reversed down the aisle away from us.
I started to hyperventilate, my breaths coming too short and stuttered.
From his bloody pants pocket, Hudson’s phone started to ring, and for some reason, that was what finally roused me into action.
“No, no, no, no, no,” I sobbed, hiccupping severely as I fell to my knees beside him and spread my hands above him, not sure what I could touch without breaking him further. He was just a bloody, mangled mess. “Don’t do this to me. Hudson.”
Panic briefly blinded me. I couldn’t think past the word no. But this couldn’t be happening. Hudson was all that was bright and beautiful and amazing. I couldn’t even picture the world continuing to spin without him now that I knew what it was like with him in it. I didn’t know how I’d continue without a Hudson in my life.
In no time at all, he’d become vital to me.
Needing him to breathe, I finally pressed my finger to his throat, looking for a pulse. But when I couldn’t find one, I sobbed and scooped his limp torso into my arms, rocking him helplessly.
And from behind me, I heard him say, “Whoa. That was freaky.”
I zipped my head up to find Hudson standing twenty feet away with his back to me, and I swear my life stopped right there.
He was gone. My twin flame had burned out. And now his spirit was free of his body.
All the oxygen left my lungs, so that when I tried to scream, no sound came. Just pain.
In front of me, Hudson lifted his palms up as if intrigued by them. And then he announced, “I could’ve sworn I was just over…”
He turned, pointing my way, and he looked like normal, everyday Hudson in the same blue jeans and Rolling Stones T-shirt as the bloody Hudson in my arms. But there wasn’t a mark on him.
When his gaze landed on mine, he froze at the devastated expression on my face before he dropped his attention to the body I was cradling.
“Ah shit,” he breathed, stumbling forward to have a better look at himself. Then he gripped his ghost head in both hands and lifted his gaze to mine, wincing. “This isn’t good.”
“Hudson,” I wept, finding my voice again as I pressed my face to his physical face and got blood all over myself. “Don’t be dead. Please…don’t be dead.”
“Fuck, Faith.” He stumbled a step back, dropping his arms lifelessly back to his sides. “I’m sorry. I’m so damn sorry. I wish… Damn, I don’t know what to do.”
“Get back in your body,” I screamed at him because I was majorly beginning to lose it. “That’s what you do. And just…fucking breathe again. Please.”
“I…” He shook his head helplessly. “Can—can I even do that?”
“Well, we won’t know if you don’t at least try it,” I ordered, desperate.
Bobbing his head, he gulped and took a timid step forward. “True.” Then he sent me one of his famous, mischievous smiles. “And may I just say, I am so glad you can see ghosts. I’d be freaking the fuck out right now if I had to go through this alone.”
“I definitely freaked out when it happened to me,” a new voice piped up, capturing both of our attentions.
Hudson glanced over at the redheaded boy who was sitting on the hood of a nearby parked car, swinging his feet idly and licking an ice cream cone.
“Brett?” Hudson reared away from the sight in surprise.
The kid merely sent him a cheerful wave and hopped off the car to wander over. “Hey, man. Welcome to death.”
“No!” I growled at him when he came too close. “Don’t you even think about coming near us. You stay away from this body.”
The boy hissed at me, no love lost between us in the least. “Don’t worry about me, Stalker. I got no need for his body anymore. That empty shell’s useless now. Besides, with Hud like this, I’m no longer alone.”
Which only made me start to cry hysterically.
“Hey, man, ease up,” Hudson warned the kid. “This is the love of my life here. And she’s grieving. Will you cut her some slack?”
Brett merely shrugged and made a sound as if to say he’d play nice if I did, and he went back to enjoying his ice cream.
I shook my head and numbly mumbled, “This can’t be happening. Please…” If someone could just make it stop happening.
Ghost Hudson met my devastated gaze and sympathy filled his eyes. Whirling toward his young friend, he demanded, “So that’s it? I’m dead? I’m really dead?”
The boy shrugged. “Looks that way. Isn’t it awesome? Now we can hang out again, like, all the time.”
“I…” Hudson’s gaze slid mournfully to me. “I was actually kind of hoping to live a little longer. Have a full life, you know.”
“Dude. Forget life.” Brett waved an unconcerned hand. “You’ll get over it. After some time, you won’t even miss it. So, come on, let’s go play. See if we can scare the crap out of some poor, living schmuck.”
When he took Hudson’s hand and tugged, Hudson resisted, his gaze stuck on mine.
I shook my head at him. “You get back in this body right now, Hudson Ivey, do you hear me? Before it’s too late.”
“I’d listen to the girl if I were you, bèl gason,” yet another newcomer spoke up.
This time, I glanced over to find Fabienne strolling forward.
“Whoa. What the fuck is wrong with her eyes?” Brett whispered to Hudson, looking intrigued. “They’re freaking awesome.”
While Hudson could only shake his head in wonder as he watched the girl in the summer dress drift toward them. “What is this?” he asked, throwing up his hands in disgust. “A freaking ghost convention?”
“I’ve been keeping tabs on you since the shop,” Fabienne told him. “Discreetly waiting for just the right time to step in again.” Turning her white, eyeless gaze to Brett, she said, “I failed my last mission to lead a soul to peace while I was alive, but I can lead one now. So come, boy.” She held out a hand toward the kid. “Let’s go. I’ll lead you into the light so you won’t have to be alone. Because that’s what you feared most, wasn’t it? Loneliness?”
As she spoke, a great warmth flooded the day, and the sunlight above us grew exponentially.
As it appeared, I leaned my body more fully over Hudson’s as if that would somehow keep his soul from going anywhere near the light.
“You don’t have to be afraid with me by your side,” Fabienne promised Brett. “Because I’m scarier than everything else out there, oui?”
Brett glanced up toward the light as if tempted. “I am…curious,” he admitted. “But what’s in there?”
“Something like you’ve never imagined before,” Fabienne whispered in enticement. “A new, never-ending adventure around every corner.”
Brett bit his lip and asked, “What about Ivey?”
With a thoughtful tip of her head, Fabienne glanced at Hudson. “It’s not his time,” she murmured thoughtfully. “He still has a chance to go back. He should take it. But you and I… We have nothing to tie us to here anymore, while we could do anything in there.”
She seemed to be genuinely convincing the boy to go with her, but I was more concerned about what she’d said about Hudson.
“Does Hudson really have a chance to stay?”
Hope started to swell inside me.
“Yeah,” Hudson asked. “Just howdo I do that?”
Mirlande’s granddaughter was way too vague for my taste when she shrugged. “The same way you came.”
Then she turned away from him and gave her attention to Brett. The boy eagerly took her fingers this time. Then he smiled big at Hudson and waved. “See you later, man. And sorry for hiding in your body and stuff. I thought it was the best place to stay, but…” Glancing up at Fabienne, he decided, “I think hanging out with her might be even better.”
“Fuck, Brett,” Hudson choked out. “If that was where you needed to chill for a while, it’s fine. But I need to say, I—I’m sorry for killing you.”
“Ah, hell.” Brett made a face and waved a dismissive hand. “You didn’t have anything to do with that. That was all me just trying to show off. Now wish me luck. This seems like it’s going to be truly epic.”
“Good luck, man,” Hudson rasped. “I’ve missed you.”
“You’ll see me again,” Brett promised. “Soon enough.”
Then, he and Fabienne turned and walked off into the brightness. The light swallowed them whole before dying away slowly.
I blinked after them, realizing more people were beginning to show up. Living people.
“Oh my God. Is he dead? Has anyone called 911?”
Hudson turned to look at me, and I ignored the bystanders as we made eye contact. My heart pounded hard in my chest, knowing this life-or-death moment would chart the course for the rest of my days.
“She said I still have a chance,” he told me with an encouraging nod.
I nodded back, ready for him to approach and try the climbing-back-into-his-body thing.
“Right.” he heaved out a deep breath. “So you think I can just crawl in there?”
“Please try,” I whispered.
So he did, edging closer and wincing when he looked at himself. “This is just so completely weird,” he told me as he carefully stepped into his chest and then sat down. Glancing at me, until we were nearly face-to-face, he reached out and tried to touch my cheek with ghost fingers, but all I could feel was utter coldness.
“Being close to you feels weird,” he said with a slight scowl. “Like…an eerie grating on my senses.”
“That’s because I’m a ghost-repellent,” I said. “So please stop being a ghost now and just lie down already.”
He nodded. “Heard.” And he settled down, disappearing fully inside himself, only to sit up a few seconds later. “Well?”
“Fuck,” I breathed and closed my eyes, shaking my head.
Hudson glanced down at his physical body which was still not connected to his soul. “Fuck,” he echoed.
“Hudson?” A voice shouted from the gathering and horrified crowd.
Hudson and I glanced over just as his friend Foster came charging through the people, breathless and panicked as if he’d been running for a while.
“Oh God,” he croaked, jarring to a stop when he saw Physical Hudson slumped in my arms.
“Shit!” Ghost Hudson popped from his dead body to hurry to Foster’s side. “Why did it have to be Foster? He’ll take it the hardest if he doesn’t resuscitate me.”
Not hearing Ghost Hudson, Foster rushed forward and fell to his knees in front of me so he could reach out and press a few fingers against the side of Physical Hudson’s throat.
“No pulse,” he said. “We need to do chest compressions. Right now. Lay him down flat. We need to keep blood flowing to his heart and brain until help arrives.”
“Okay. Okay.” I nodded, ready to do anything as I gently shifted Hudson’s body off my lap and positioned him back on the ground.
Foster immediately got to it, pumping on him.
“911,” he said aloud as he worked. “Has anyone called 911 yet?”
“We’re on the phone with them right now,” some bystanders called from the crowd that seemed to be growing exponentially.
At least three of them were talking on their phone, and another half a dozen were taking a video of Foster giving Hudson CPR.
“Come on, Ivey. Come on,” Foster muttered, shaking his head as tears filled his eyes. “Don’t you dare die on me. Don’t you dare die.”
“He’ll be okay,” I said. “He has to.” Repeating Fabienne’s words, I chanted, “It’s not his time yet.”
Foster sent me a quick, worried glance but returned his attention to what he was doing just as the faint sound of sirens filled the air.
Next to me, Ghost Hudson began to wring his hands in worry as he watched Foster.
“Faith,” he said. “You gotta tell him it wasn’t his fault if this doesn’t work, okay? I was already dead by the time he got here. He didn’t do anything wrong. But he’s going to try to blame himself. I don’t want him blaming himself over this. He already blames himself for too much.”
“I don’t have to tell him shit,” I hissed under my breath, my hands fisted down at my sides as I prayed. “Because you’re going to come back.”
“But if I don’t?—”
“Shut up!” I said it with enough force that people started to look at me funny. But I ignored them and turned my attention to Foster. “Just a little bit longer,” I assured. “Help’s almost here. You’ve got this, Foster.”
He nodded as another one of Hudson’s crew arrived on the scene. “What the hell happened?” Keene demanded when he saw me stagger to my feet and begin to pace. He was panting and out of breath after pushing his way through people. “Thane just sent out an alert to get our asses to this parking lot, asap. Something about?—”
Finally spotting Foster on the ground giving Hudson CPR, he froze to gape for a full second as if he couldn’t even comprehend what he was seeing.
I blinked at him. “But how did Thane?—?”
“Oh shit!” Keene boomed. “Is that Hudson?”
Abandoning me, Keene rushed to Foster’s side. “Union, man…” He tapped Foster’s shoulder. “Give me a turn. You already look worn out.”
But Foster shook his head, determined to keep pumping on Hudson’s chest with the heels of his palms.
“Damn, I wish he’d let Keene take over,” Hudson lamented next to me. “Keene wouldn’t take it nearly as personally as Foster would. Keene would accept that there was nothing he could’ve done, and he’d be able to move on from it faster.”
He went to hover near his friends, more worried about them than himself.
I shook my head and started to cry some more before I heard my name being called.
When I glanced over, I saw Oaklynn and Damien pushing through the people to reach me. “What’s going on?” she asked as I charged toward her for support.
“It’s Hudson,” I said, taking her hands gratefully when she reached for me.
Her attention dropped to our connection, and she turned my palms up to gape in confusion at my scraped, abraded skin. “What?—?”
I didn’t even care that I was getting blood all over her and I’d only met her once. She was important to Hudson, so I clung to any comfort she was willing to give. “Genesis ran him over with her car.”
“Oh God.” Damien finally spotted his body and raced over to join Keene and Foster.
Next to me, Oaklynn tilted her head in confusion, focusing on the ghost. “But Hudson looks fine.”
I swallowed weakly. “Look again, honey.”
She squinted at him, then looked at the body on the ground. When her eyes flared with horror, I squeezed down on her fingers in support.
“Oh…oh,” she whimpered as tears flooded her eyes. “Oh God. No.” Turning to me in a panic, she shook her head. “I can’t tell Damien. I can’t?—”
“You don’t have to,” I assured. “Because Foster’s going to bring him back. Hudson’s coming back.”
She shook her head, looking traumatized.
Noticing her about to have a panic attack, Ghost Hudson loped over. “Hey, Dimples,” he said with a friendly wave. “Good news. I can be around you again without giving you a nosebleed. Brett’s no longer in my body.”
But that didn’t cheer her up in the least. Sobbing harder, she shook her head and wailed, “Hudson.”
He cringed and went misty-eyed. “I mean, the bad news is that I’m no longer in my body either. But hey, can’t have everything, right?”
“No.” Oaklynn shook her head. “You can’t die. Damien would be devastated. Fuck, I’d be devastated. The seven’s not the seven without you.”
“You’ll take Faith under your wing, right?” he asked with a hopeful nod. “Don’t let her go through this alone. Make her one of you. She’s amazing. I know you’ll love her just as much as I do if you just…accept her into the group.”
“Stop,” I demanded, lifting my hands, unable to handle this. “Just?—”
But Ghost Hudson cut me off when he gave a sudden jerk and clutched his chest. “Son of a bitch.” He winced and started to massage his heart. “I think Union just broke my damn rib.”
My eyes widened with hope, and Oaklynn jerked on my arm excitedly. A second later, Hudson finally caught on and zipped his face up, gaping at us.
“Holy shit, I felt that,” he realized. “The CPR’s working.”
Together, Oaklynn and I burst toward the guys. “It’s working!” we exclaimed together.
Foster lifted his face in question, only to blink at the place where Ghost Hudson was standing next to me. “Hudson?” he choked in confusion.
“Wait? Can you see him?” Oaklynn demanded, just as Ghost Hudson disappeared completely.
“Where’d he go?” I sobbed, beginning to panic. It was bad enough that he’d died. But losing his ghost too…
No.
No fucking way.
“Where’d he go?” I demanded a little bit more loudly.
If he’d already crossed over to the other side or wherever the fuck deceased people who didn’t become ghosts went, I’d never forgive him.
There was really no time to search for him, though, because campus police arrived then.
The crowd parted to let their cruiser through, and it screeched to a halt within feet of Hudson’s body.
Two men exited the car, and from there, things happened at hyper speed.
One of the men took over for Foster, continuing the chest compressions, and Foster fell back, breathing hard with his face red from his exertions.
Knowing that Hudson wanted me to comfort him, I hurried over to kneel behind him, where I wrapped an arm around the football star’s shoulders. He clutched onto me gratefully, and we watched with the others as the second officer lugged a black backpack-looking thing over with the letters AED on it.
He knelt next to the first guy and unzipped the bag before taking a portable defibrillator out. Then he turned the machine on, and it started to talk, telling him to apply the pads, which he did, placing one right on the upper-right portion of Hudson’s chest. The second went on his rib cage, lower on his left side.
Then they connected the pads to the machine, and it analyzed Hudson’s vitals, before it announced, “Shock advised. Charging. Stay clear of patient. Deliver shock now.”
As everyone stood back from Hudson’s body, the officer pushed a button on the machine.
Hudson’s chest lurched through the shock, and the defibrillator’s mechanical voice announced that they could touch the patient again.
After another round of CPR, the machine checked Hudson’s stats again before giving him another shock.
This time, Hudson sucked in a breath and his chest rose afterward.
“He’s breathing.” Keene pointed, grabbing Damien’s arm and tugging excitedly. “He’s fucking breathing!”
“Oh, thank God,” Foster sobbed and slumped back against me, letting me support him completely.
I patted his arm and started to cry again, but at least they were tears of joy this time.
“He’s going to make it,” I said because I just needed to hear it said aloud. “He’s going to be okay.”