22. Madison #2
Ford appeared at my shoulder, his body tense, his voice hard as stone. “I didn’t invite her. I would never invite her anywhere, especially not somewhere you’d be. I kicked her out of my house and I haven’t spoken to her since.”
“Then someone better explain to me how she’s standing over there watching us like she has every right to be here, because I know she didn’t swim out to meet the boat.”
“That’s my fault, I’m afraid.” Raymond was walking toward us with Emery trailing behind him, both of them looking uncomfortable.
“She’s been consulting on a project for my firm for the past few weeks.
I mentioned the boat trip in passing and she asked if she could come along.
I had no idea there was a problem between you all. ”
“There’s a problem. A big one.” Ford stepped forward, putting his body between me and the direction where Valerie was standing. “She’s not welcome anywhere near Madison. Not now, not ever.”
“Ford, I genuinely had no idea there was history…”
“Now you know.” Ford’s shoulders were tight with tension, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. “Keep her away from us for the rest of this trip. I don’t care how you do it.”
I didn’t wait to hear Raymond’s response or his excuses. I turned and walked toward the stern of the boat, away from all of them, my hands shaking so badly I had to clench them to hide the tremor.
Ford followed me. Of course he followed me.
“Madison, wait. Please just wait a second.”
“I need a minute to myself. I need to breathe without looking at her face.”
“I know. I understand.” He caught up to me but didn’t try to touch me, keeping a careful distance. “I just want you to know that I had nothing to do with this. I didn’t know she would be here and I would never have let it happen if I’d known.”
“I believe you.”
“Do you? Really?”
I stopped at the back railing and gripped it with both hands, my knuckles going white.
“Yes, Ford. I believe you. That doesn’t make it any easier to see her face. It doesn’t make the anger go away.”
He stood beside me, close enough that I could feel his presence but not touching me, giving me the space I needed.
We stood there in silence for a while, watching the water churn and foam in the boat’s wake. The boat kept moving, cutting through the harbor, and slowly my heart rate started to come back down to something approaching normal.
“I hate that she can still do this to me,” I said quietly, the words coming out before I could stop them. “Make me feel like this. Angry and scared and completely out of control. Like I’m right back in that house watching her touch you.”
“You’re not out of control. Not even close.” Ford’s voice was gentle but firm. “You’re having a completely reasonable reaction to seeing someone who tried to destroy your marriage. Anyone would feel the same way.”
“Our marriage was already destroyed before she showed up, Ford.”
“That’s not true. I know it feels true but it’s not.
” He turned to face me, his expression serious.
“We had problems, Madison. But we weren’t destroyed, not completely, not until I let her convince me that your feelings didn’t matter.
That your concerns about her were just jealousy. That’s on me. Not on you.”
I looked at him, and saw something I hadn’t noticed before. He looked tired in a way that went beyond lack of sleep. Older. Worn down. Like the weight of everything he’d done wrong had finally settled into his bones and he was carrying it everywhere he went.
“I’m sorry.” His voice cracked on the words.
“Ford, you don’t have to…”
“I’m not saying it to get anything from you. I don’t expect forgiveness or a second chance or anything else. I’m just so fucking sorry, baby.”
I nodded slowly, not trusting myself to speak. I didn’t know what to say to that.
Twenty minutes passed in silence. I stayed at the stern railing and Ford stayed with me, both of us watching the horizon, not talking about Valerie or the past or any of the things that still sat heavy between us.
Then I felt her approaching the second Ford left to get us something to drink.
“Madison.” Valerie’s voice was sugar-sweet, dripping with false sincerity. “I was hoping I could talk to you for a moment. I wanted to apologize for intruding on your day. I didn’t mean to cause any discomfort.”
“Save it,” I said without turning around. “Whatever apology you’ve rehearsed, I don’t want to hear it.”
“I understand you’re upset, and I think you have every right to be.
” She moved closer, positioning herself at my side where I couldn’t ignore her presence.
“I made mistakes when I was staying with Ford. I was going through the worst time of my life and I leaned on him too heavily. But I never meant to hurt you, Madison. That was never my intention.”
Now I turned to face her. She was standing there in a white sundress, her face arranged in an expression of wounded innocence that she must have practiced in the mirror a thousand times.
“You never meant to hurt me.” I kept my voice flat, refusing to give her the satisfaction of seeing how much she affected me.
“You moved into my house without asking. You touched my husband every chance you got, finding any excuse to put your hands on him. You played the victim every single time I tried to set a boundary with you. And now you’re standing here, on this boat, telling me you never meant to cause any harm? ”
“I think you’re misremembering some things, Madison. The situation was more complicated than you’re making it sound…”
“I’m not misremembering anything.” I stepped closer to her. “I remember every look you gave him. Every touch that lasted too long. Every time you made me feel like I was losing my mind for seeing what was right in front of my face.”
Valerie’s expression flickered, the mask slipping for just a second to reveal the cold calculation underneath. The real her, the one she kept hidden beneath all that practiced sweetness.
“Ford and I have history,” she said, her voice going harder, dropping the wounded act. “We’ve known each other since we were children running around Newport together. You can’t compete with that kind of connection.”
“I’m not competing with anything and I never was. I’m telling you, clearly and simply, to stay away from me.”
“Or what? What exactly are you going to do about it?”
“Or I’ll stop being polite about it. And you won’t like me when I stop being polite.”
She laughed. “You’re threatening me now? In front of all these people? That’s really the road you want to go down?”
“I’m making myself perfectly clear. That’s all I’m doing.”
We were alone at the stern railing. The rest of the group was near the cabin, too far away to hear us, too absorbed in their own conversations to notice.
“This is exactly what I was talking about,” Valerie said, her voice low and venomous. “You’ve always been like this. Jealous and paranoid and impossible to deal with.”
“Ford’s not here,” I said. “So whatever performance you’re putting on, you’re wasting your time.”
Her eyes welled with tears. “You’ve always hated me for no reason. I tried so hard to be your friend, Madison. But you were…”
“Stay away from me, Valerie.”
“Or what?” She stepped closer, her voice dropping even lower. “What are you going to do about it? Ford’s not here to protect you. No one’s watching. No one’s going to see what really happens.”
“Back off,” I said.
“Make me,” she said.
I didn’t move. I stood perfectly still with my hands on the railing behind me, refusing to give her the satisfaction of a reaction.
Her face twisted into an ugly sneer. And then she screamed and threw herself backward over the railing.
I didn’t even have time to react. One second she was standing in front of me, the next she was gone, her scream piercing the air as she fell. The splash was loud, water erupting in a white spray.
I ran to the railing and looked down. She was flailing in the water below, her white dress billowing around her, her arms thrashing wildly.
“Help!” she screamed. “Help me! Help!”