Chapter Twenty-nine
‘I wanted to tell you,’ Liam says, ‘but I was under NDA.’ He glances around at his neighbors’ doors. ‘Let’s move this inside.’
I follow him in. My heart is thundering.
He closes the door behind us. I plant my feet and cross my arms, not willing to move further into the apartment.
‘I’m so mad at you,’ I say, blinking back tears.
‘And I take full ownership of—’
‘Do you have any idea how stressful it was to date you when I thought you were a killer? And then how much whiplash I went through when I decided you weren’t, and then you were?’
‘I—’
‘I watched YouTube videos on self-defense! I bought weapons! Which, by the way, weren’t cheap! I—’ I make a growling sound. ‘We could have worked together, damn it, instead of me worrying if I could get out my stun gun fast enough!’
‘Margot—’ Liam’s voice is calm. Warm. ‘I’m sorry.
As a person, obviously I feel terrible about misleading you.
But as a PI, I …’ His jaw ripples. ‘I had a job to do. You were the roommate. After Zoe didn’t show up for the date, I figured I’d spooked her.
And then it’s like she dropped off the map.
I started to wonder if she’d skipped town, if she was that desperate to avoid her parents.
I went to the gallery a few times to see if I could find a lead there, and it was pure luck that I finally met Arjun.
When I realized I could get a date with Zoe’s roommate, I thought it was my lucky break.
I figured, of anyone, you’d know where she’d gone.
Hell, I even thought there was a chance you helped her disappear. ’
‘You pretended to be surprised that she’d disappeared!’
His face is pained. ‘I had to pretend I knew nothing about her.’
‘But you didn’t just use me to investigate,’ I say. ‘You tried to – to – seduce me.’
‘Seduce you?’ His face is disbelieving. ‘You’re the one who kissed me at Wine & Thistle!’
‘That is not what happened!’ I pause for a minute, trying to remember the kiss.
Who leaned forward first? It’s unfortunately fuzzy, damn it, and now there’s a warm tingly feeling in my thighs to boot, which I dash mental cold water on because I’d prefer to stay mad.
‘Anyway, you – you made me want to! You manipulated me!’
‘Manipulated you? Margot—’ He blows out a breath.
‘Yeah, acting all curious about me like “oh, tell me everything about you,” and being all caring and interesting with your “I have sides for days—”’ My voice rises to a shout.
‘—and then you fucking took me to Navy Pier and held my hand and bought me a fucking squirrel! Of course I wanted to kiss you! But let the record show that you’re definitely the one who kissed me on the Ferris wheel! ’
‘Well you made up a fake cat named Fluffers and said that my fish self was a guppy, whatever the hell that means, so of course I wanted to kiss you too, so sorry for being attracted to a smart, driven woman who surprises me like no one else has, ever!’ he shouts back.
We stand there, the air pulsing with energy.
He opens his mouth but I cut him off. ‘I know. The stupid fucking non-disclosure.’
‘I can’t apologize for my principles.’ His face softens. ‘I promised secrecy, and I take that seriously. But they’re no longer employing me. They released me today and wrote my last check. I picked it up at the memorial.’
‘What about her killer? He’s still out there! Don’t they care?’
‘The contract was to find her.’
‘And a body part and a bag of ashes is enough?’
‘I can’t speak for them. But, Margot – it’s not over for you, so it’s not over for me. We’ll find out what happened to her. I promise.’
‘I can’t pay you.’
‘I’m not asking for money. This is for …’ He hesitates. ‘Well, it’s for me.’
I give him a questioning look and wait.
He licks his lips. ‘I became a PI because of Janie.’
Of course. Something in my heart switches. Like a dam releasing, the anger drains out of me. Liam isn’t the enemy. He’s the guy who’s trying to make the world better.
‘My specialty is trying to reunite families,’ he says, his gaze steady on me. ‘It’s my passion – that I also happen to be very good at. On the good cases, I find them when they’re alive.’ He pauses, his eyes full of something I recognize all too well: grief. ‘But they’re not all good.’
I step forward and let my head fall against his chest. Slowly, his arms come around me. We stand there. I can feel his heartbeat. I can feel mine.
‘I’m sorry for everything you’ve been through,’ he says.
‘The world keeps breaking my heart,’ I whisper.
‘I know,’ he murmurs, and the way he says it, I know that’s how he feels too.
We stay there for a long time. This is what I crave – someone to help ground me. Someone to hold me up when I’m weak. I guess I’ve never had that.
When I finally pull away, I can feel the exhaustion crashing down on me. There’s so much to process, from the disappeared ashes to the very different version of Zoe’s childhood I just got from Tim, to the art connection with two of the victims.
I heave out a breath. ‘I don’t even know where to start.’
‘We’ll figure it out.’
‘It’s not just Zoe, though. There are two other women who disappeared before her that I know are linked. And now there’s Brooke, that influencer …’
‘You think they’re connected?’
‘Yeah. I think there’s a serial killer involved.’ And then, my eyes are leaking again. ‘Sorry,’ I sniffle, ‘I don’t know if I’m up for talking it all out right now. I think right now I need to go home and sleep for about twelve hours.’
‘I completely agree. And as your boyfriend—’ Liam waits to see if I challenge him. I don’t. ‘—I think you should consider taking some days off work.’
‘I don’t know how to do that.’
‘It’s easy. You call and say you’re not coming in.’
‘That’s not what I do, though. I always keep pushing. I don’t know if I know how to stop.’
His voice is tender. ‘Maybe it’s a good time to try.’
I take in a shivery breath. ‘I feel weak as shit, Liam.’
‘That’s normal. But you’re an incredibly strong person, Margot. I hope you know that.’
Oh, no. I can feel a knot in my chest loosening, like I’m about to cry. It’s been a shit day. Maybe one of the worst days of my life. The memorial was a lot. My friend is gone. I thought I was holding it together, but … Fuck. All I want to do now is fall into Liam’s arms and weep.
‘I mean, more like an obsessive wreck.’
Instead of cracking a smile, his gaze intensifies. ‘No. You’re tenacious. Intelligent. Passionate. Interesting.’
‘I’m not that interesting,’ I say quickly, trying to cinch myself back together. ‘I’m really kind of average, if you think about it—’
‘Average?’ His voice is low. ‘You move bodies so you can investigate your friend’s disappearance.
You think the world is unhinged chaos but you’re still living from a place of hope, you’d date a guy who you thought was a serial killer just to get answers about your friend.
You’re loyal to a fault, and stubborn and maybe a little reckless too, and you don’t try to say the right thing, you’re just yourself, outspoken and smart and funny, and that’s so – so damn—’
At that, I burst into tears.
Liam gently folds me in his arms.
‘Let’s get you home.’