Chapter 17
Two weeks and two days since Izayuh was born. The moon was expected to be a complete new moon this evening, which meant tomorrow would be the first night Quinnlyn would have to shift since we’d been here. We hadn’t really talked about what he would do or what I’d do.
I felt back to myself, except for the emotional waves that hit me.
Physically, it hadn’t felt like I even gave birth.
All the milk had dried up. I hadn’t spotted in days.
The pendant around my neck was a reminder that I indeed gave birth.
I’d agreed to let him wait on hand and foot until today.
I decided that I’d start making meals and doing some of the house chores.
There wasn’t much to do. We didn’t have a lot there anyway.
I opened the door slowly, heading for the kitchen.
We went to one of the small grocery stores a couple of days ago, and we’d picked up everything for biscuits and gravy.
It was something I was really good at making.
Quinnlyn was lying on the floor on top of a sleeping bag.
As I looked at him and then looked at the kitchen, there was no way I was gonna be able to cook without waking him up.
I tried anyway. As soon as the sausage started sizzling in the pan, he rolled over and twisted his head up at me.
“I would have made you breakfast,” he mumbled.
“Yes, I could have let you, but I like to do for myself. You said that you would let me help as of today,” I said.
He loudly groaned.
“Did you start the oven?”
“Good Lord, yes,” I said, before letting out a loud sigh.
He rolled back over on his back and put the pillow on top of his head.
“You can go back to sleep in the bed?”
“Absolutely not,” he grumbled.
“Jeez, forget I mentioned it,” I said.
I carried on cooking the sausage before I added flour to the sausage and grease.
Once it was mixed, I added milk slowly, making a thick gravy.
About the time the timer beeped, letting me know the biscuits were done, the gravy was just the right consistency.
I made myself a plate and went to the table to eat.
“It’s done,” I told him.
“I know,” he said, flatly.
“Ya know, when it's shifting time, you're like a woman about to start her period. Pissy as fuck,” I said.
“Yes. No. Yes. It’s complicated. If only you fully understood, and no, before you ask, I’m not explaining it,” he said.
I pressed my lips tightly and blinked rapidly for several seconds. I wanted to yell at him so loud, but I didn’t. I closed my eyes, took in a huge breath, and then continued eating my food. A few minutes later, he sat at the table. His brows were furrowed as he focused on the plate in front of him.
“What is the plan for tomorrow?” I asked.
“What do you mean?” he countered.
“It’s the start of the full moon, you will shift…” I said.
“Yes, I’m exactly aware of the moon cycle,” he said.
“PMSing woman,” I said under my breath.
“I’m ignoring that.”
“Is someone coming to stay with me tomorrow?”
“No. I’ll stay in the woods.”
“I’ll be by myself,” I said.
“Aw, will you miss me?” he teased.
“No,” I said quickly.
“I’ll be outside hunting my favorite… deer,” he said.
“You’re a fucking ass,” I said.
I grabbed my plate. All appetite gone. I cleared the rest into the trash.
I washed the pans and my plate before I headed out the door.
I decided that I’d start running. Once I got to the river, I started running up the riverbank.
I only made it so far before the bank ran out, and I had to turn around and run back down the bank.
I ran past the trail to the house. I'd never been down that way.
I ran down the bank until I was no longer able to.
By the time I made it back to the trail to go back to the house, I had to stop to catch my breath.
As I ran up to the house, Quinnlyn was sitting in a chair on the porch.
He looked up from his book at me. He made a low growl noise and looked back down at his book. I squinted my eyes at him.
“Running, eh?” he asked.
“I used to love running years ago. It had always helped me work through things,” I told him.
My mouth was dry, desperate for a drink.
Back home, the crick water had been so clear and clean that you could drink it.
The Mississippi lived up to its nickname as the muddy river.
I wouldn’t drink it unless I were already dying.
I gulped a full glass of water down quickly, filled it up, and walked outside with it. I sat down in the other chair.
“You smell… ripe,” he said.
“Thanks… I guess,” I said.
“It's not exactly a bad thing… just… was your run good?” he asked.
“Yeah… I ran the bank until it ended.”
“Just watch for the wildlife,” he said.
“I know… dad. Alligators and snakes are mostly dormant, and any bears should also be hibernating…” I snarked.
“If you don’t want to be alone, you could go stay at Lina’s,” he said.
“No, I’ll be alright,” I told him.
“Well, I’m sure she will probably stop by tomorrow to check on you, so don’t be alarmed,” he said.
“Oh, okay, that’s good to know,” I said.
We sat there for several minutes, in silence. Something both of us were comfortable sitting in. I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. I thought about what Lina had told me about taking my anger out on him and him wrestling with his siblings.
“Do you… Would you.. Um…” I said, struggling to get the right words out.
“Ask it, Zalayuh,” he said.
“Would you teach me self-defense?”
“What?”
“You know, show me how to fight? Fend off, someone?”
“Who do you need to fend off?”
“Maybe you?”
“No amount of training could train you if I wanted you,” he said. My head spun to look at him. He was still staring at his book.
“Yes or No, Quinnlyn?” I asked. He lifted his head and turned to stare at me.
“Just Quinn, and sure. When do you want to start?”
“Today,” I said, without skipping a beat.
“Today?” he repeated.
“Yeah, is that a problem?”
“Not exactly… would you be opposed to waiting until Sunday?”
“Why Sun—oh, after your wolfy thing?”
“If you insist, we can do it today, but I’d really prefer to wait until after,” he said, his eyes back on his book.
“Sunday is fi—that’s Christmas. Oh my lord, we haven’t done anything,” I said.
“Do you want to do anything? Do you want a tree?” he asked.
“I don’t know…”
The following morning, he was awake before me.
The smell of bacon filling my room woke me up.
I was a sucker for bacon. Once I made it out of the room, he’d finished his plate and was washing it in the sink.
I made myself a plate and sat at the table.
I could tell by the way he was standing there that he wasn’t in a great mood. After he was done, he walked outside.
Last night, I ran again right as the sun was setting.
I didn’t want to be weak again. I wouldn’t be weak again.
Izayuh would motivate me to be strong. I walked outside to go on another run.
Quinn was still not to be seen. I carried on and headed to the river.
Once I got to where the eagles' nest was, I stopped and looked up at them.
Loud chirping came from overhead. Butterflies rushed through my stomach.
It was one of the most joyous sounds to listen to.
I sat on the rocks, staring up at the nest. I saw part of one of the eagles in the nest bowl.
I knew from the nest back home that fresh eaglets stayed under their parents for several weeks before they came out.
The babies must have settled in, as the chirping slowed down and then stopped. I finished running the bank, turned around, and ran all the way back up the other side. It was a cool morning, even with running, I was cold.
I headed to the house and walked inside.
He wasn't inside, or anywhere I could see outside. The truck was still here, though. I knew that when he usually left, it was closer to sunset, and surely he wouldn’t have left without actually saying bye.
Did I care if he didn’t say bye? I shrugged my shoulders.
I headed for a shower, wanting to get rid of the post-run smells. I took way too long in the shower, enjoying the extra hot water. As I’d turned the water off, I heard the door close. My heart skipped a beat. It had to be Quinn, but part of me worried that it wasn’t.
“Zalayuh, it’s me,” he called out.
It was like he knew I was panicking. Then I remembered how he could smell my fear. He must have smelled it. Surely, he couldn’t have heard my heart through the door. My heart started slowing back down as I got dressed.
“Where’d you go earlier?” I asked.
“Exploring the area,” he said.
“Is there anything I should know about tonight?”
“Don’t go outside alone?”
“I can’t leave the house?” I said, my eyes widened at him.
“No, I’m pulling your leg,” he said.
“I’m being serious,” I said.
“I told you, we aren’t interested in eating humans. Most of us don’t even eat or hunt other animals. This is some curse that has been put on us,” he said.
“So, if you’re outside turned, and I’m outside, you wouldn’t try to eat me?” I asked.
“Definitely not…” he said.
“Okay, okay. Good to know,” I said.
“Do I need to take you into town to get anything?” he asked.
“Hmm… I don’t think so. If I need something, can I drive your—”
“No,” he said, cutting me off.
“Doesn’t hurt a lady to try.”
“Yeah… I’ll be hiding my keys,” he muttered.
“What if there is an actual emergency?”
He narrowed his eyes at me. “Call 9-1-1.”
I blinked my eyes rapidly at him. “Whatever.”
“Lina’s number is written on the paper next to the fridge,” he said.
I grabbed the book I’d been reading and plopped into the light blue chair.
He paced around the house, going outside, then back in.
I was used to this. I didn’t fully understand it before.
I hadn’t seen this in the cellar, but I had when we were at the Lupo house.
He would pace and be agitated on the nights he shifted, with the full moon being worse.
I learned to keep to myself, not pry or pay much attention to him.