22
By the time we’re sitting across from Rainn and the Greenfield Pack Luna for lunch in the Forest Café, my stomach knots hard enough to evaporate my appetite.
Lilian’s golden-brown skin glistens beneath the cafe’s gentle lighting, but her angular eyes are just as set and hardened as Noah’s, if not more. Her graying hair winds into a tight bun behind her head, youth still gracing her full lips and lean cheeks. I’ve tried to keep my eyes off the white scar streaking the left side of her forehead, slipping past the right side of her nose and just beneath her eye, but it’s difficult to make eye contact without my gaze catching on it. Guilt permeates my lungs when she notices me staring, but Lilian carries on as if it’s expected, not sparing me a second glance.
Introductions went okay, but not even Rainn’s lighthearted chatter can take my mind off Lilian’s set jaw. I’m getting the sense she’s talking to Noah privately through mindlink, which means I feel like the odd one out. Embarrassment and hurt simmer in my gut. I know Noah feels awful about it; his stormy eyes shoot me pained glances every minute or less.
But I want to learn from Lilian about becoming Luna, and get on her good side while I’m at it.
As the waiter takes Lilian’s order, Rainn cups her hand over my ear. “Mom likes it when people ask specific questions. She’d never admit it, but she’s a bit shy without a little boost.”
My rising headache softens. I touch Rainn’s arm with a smile, leaning in to whisper. “You’re an angel.”
Rainn’s grin brightens until it scrunches her nose at the top.
When Lilian turns back to me, I straighten. “Luna, I’d love to hear about something you admire most about the Greenfield Pack. I’ve been so curious how it’s been for you as an Omega here over the years.”
Lilian lowers her fork, settling in with her stare. At least I think that’s a stare, not a glare. “Greenfield is highly admirable. I remember wondering the same thing as an outsider Omega and being pleasantly surprised.”
I don’t appreciate being called an outsider, but I smile anyway. “I can see why. The pack you and Noah are holding together makes me feel at home. Thank you, Luna.”
Lilian nods. “My mate left our pack in incredible shape for Noah to inherit. I personally believe we didn’t have to change much, but Noah is never satisfied with tradition.”
My heart sinks. Did she have to phrase it like that? On top of slamming Noah’s belief system, she gave him basically no credit.
But Rainn folds her hands under her chin, grinning at Noah. “And Noah’s advocacy work really took it the extra mile. We’re really living up to the Greenfield name, wouldn’t you say, Mom?” She nudges Lilian softly, and I bite back a laugh - the two of them suddenly looking like a Maltese puppy poking a mountain lion with her nose.
Noah scoots closer, but his voice still comes out so soft that I have to lean in as he speaks. “I-I forgot to mention my grandma was the first Greenfield Alpha.”
“Your grandma?” I gasp. “Wait, that must’ve been decades ago. Wasn’t a woman leading a pack pretty untraditional?”
Noah grins wide enough to show off his sharp incisors. “Absolutely.”
I follow his eyesight to Rainn’s proud smile. But when Lilian looks up from her water glass, Noah drops his head to shake out his tousled hair - or to avoid his mom’s glare. She rolls her eyes.
But Rainn pays her no mind. “Grandma would be so proud. Her son and his son already left a vital mark on the world.”
“Your dad certainly did,” Lilian mutters.
I can’t take this anymore.
“It seems like they’ve all been incredible Alphas,” I blurt out.
The resulting silence raises my shoulders.
When Noah peeks over with a stifled grin, I lighten my tone. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here to see Alpha Ritchie’s leadership. But in meeting your son, I have no doubt his dad was an outstanding top Alpha.”
Lilian quirks one eyebrow. “Well, you don’t really know Noah yet. You’ve only marked him.”
Rainn gasps.
But Noah’s gentle voice sharpens. “Mom.”
Oh, no. With how defensive Noah already feels, my wolf is boiling.
I grip Noah’s hand beneath the table. “I did mark him. And after waiting my whole life to find my mate, I’m excited to get to know him more every day.”
Lilian drops her stare, shaking her head as she sips her water.
Rainn puts her arm around my shoulders in a gentle squeeze. “I’m excited for you both too.”
I try to give her a reassuring smile, but it’s a wimpy excuse of one - only lifting one cheek.
The waiter arrives with our order, including a full plate of meat for Noah. I shrink into myself; I probably shouldn’t have fed a wolf mostly vegetables this morning. He’s so sweet to have eaten it anyway.
But Lilian is right. I have so much more to learn about Noah.
Noah slips his hand from mine to rub my back. My tense shoulders soften.
His gentle voice is even quieter than usual, lowering our conversation into a hum. “Mom, I was hoping you could tell us more about what it’s like to be Luna.”
“So she can strip me of my title?” Lilian snaps, intending to silence us, but Noah doesn’t miss a beat.
“You mean like you did when you mated with Dad? That’s how it usually works, yes.”
Noah’s stoic stare is icier than usual, leaving no room for questions. Not even Rainn gives her room to budge, meeting her with a rare straight face.
Lilian falls silent, turning to her food.
I feel too sick to keep eating. I don’t even know what to ask, this time.
“It’s a lot of work, being Luna,” Lilian mutters. She says nothing more.
I try not to visibly dissolve, wishing I could hide beneath the table.
But Lilian clears her throat. “However, it’s manageable for the right person, considering much of it just requires some compassion for those who need it.”
Okay, I can work with this. I give her my preschool teacher smile. “That’s wonderful. Thank you for sharing that, Luna.”
She nods, shoving more food into her mouth without meeting my stare. I bite back a smile; with her flushed cheeks and short, fleeting glances, I recognize a little bit of Noah in her now.
“Luna, I’m curious, when you say those who need it, which pack members are you referring to? Do you feel like certain groups need more support lately?”
She softens her glare, still gluing her focus to her plate. “The Rogues. Noah is like his father, seeing the majority who suffer over the few who create chaos. I’m grateful for our family’s long-term values in that.”
Rainn glances over my head at Noah, her voice soft and sincere. “Me too. You still have no idea how much you help the pups I meet.”
Noah’s tense jaw finally loosens, allowing a sweet smile to shine through his eyes. “I-I’m glad. They have the best teacher, so they should be happier during the day, at least.”
Rainn laughs. “Oh, stop. You’re too sweet to me.”
I gasp. “Rainn, you’re a teacher too?!”
Rainn’s chest lifts. “I am - Greenfield’s Forest School daycare teacher! I was so excited to hear that we had that in common!”
I peek at Noah, surprised by my shy mate. “You didn’t tell me Rainn was a teacher!”
Rainn laughs. “Because I’m not his mate. Once you get Noah talking about something he adores, he’ll never stop.”
My heart flips.
Noah sighs, his focus buried into his plate over burning cheeks, but he’s still grinning. “Never?”
Rainn grips his shoulder over the back of my chair to give him a playful shake. “No, never!”
I can’t stop smiling as the two siblings beam at each other, Noah rising into a playful giggle that lifts my heart.
But Lilian isn’t smiling. “My heart genuinely aches for those Rogue pups. Your Alpha is right; they’re lucky to have you as their role model, Rainn.”
Rainn bites her lip, but she’s smiling softer than I’ve seen all day, her eyes glassy with emotion.
From what I’ve gathered, Rogues are Lycans outcast from a pack. They have a bad reputation in most places. But I had to find that out through Amy and Kira; Noah never says a single disparaging word about Rogues. In his eyes, they’re displaced refugees. Abuse survivors, stuck without resources to move like I was – if my parents didn’t die and leave me everything they ever owned.
I clear my throat, not expecting to get as choked up as I am. “I’m so grateful for your family’s compassion in that too, Luna. You have no idea.” But she must have some idea of how much I really mean it, holding my stare a fraction longer with a surprising burst of warmth.
Lilian fiddles with a meat scrap, passing it back and forth across her plate. “But I believe you initially asked about my personal opinion, yes? About who needs a bit more compassion?” She only meets my eyes for a split second - just long enough to see me nod before zipping back to her plate. “I have to admit I have an extra special place in my heart for those who have lost a loved one. A mate.” Lilian chews on her lip. “Well, if they survive. There’s only a few survivors every decade.”
Noah’s overwhelm spikes. I grip his hand harder, attempting to stabilize us both, but I’m shocked too. Lilian is offering this information herself, and it’s deeply personal. Not only to Lilian, Rainn, and Noah but to my parents too.
She swirls the meat scrap around her plate faster, her voice quieting into a delicate purr. “Maybe I’ve become more jaded with age, but being Luna didn’t feel like a job when I was Noah’s age. And certain tasks still don’t feel like work, so I hang onto those moments. Let them carry me through the rest.”
“I love that. What types of tasks?”
“Even before we lost Ritchie, Noah was our rainbow baby after his sister’s loss, so I understood grief on a level many can’t without experience.”
I clench my jaw, stifling the sharp pain in my chest. So they lost Noah’s older sister during pregnancy? I have a million questions and heartaches, but I wouldn’t dare interrupt Lilian.
Her voice rings with confidence, no matter how quiet. “I visit grieving wolves and check in with them, ensuring they feel supported. We have a network of wolves bringing grieving pack members daily meals and comforts.”
My heart pounds. “I wish I had a community like that when I lost my parents.”
She places her hand over mine, her comforting scent washing over me. “Now you do.”
With loosening shoulders, I smile away the threat of tears. “Thank you, Luna.”
“You’re welcome, my dear.”
Lilian gives me an honest, shy smile, and the atmosphere in the whole restaurant lifts. I finally feel safe enough to take another bite, feeling Noah’s wolf relax with mine.
But then Noah stiffens. I look up to find Lilian glaring at him. He won’t even look at her.
Turning to Lilian, Rainn’s whisper is surprisingly sharp. “We’re eating.”
But Lilian doesn’t even look at her daughter, locking her focus onto her rigid son.
After a fiery silence, Lilian shakes her head with a scoff. “Oh, enough of this. If you won’t even talk, why are you here? Look at how uncomfortable you’ve made your poor mate.”
“Mom, don’t drag her into this.”
“I’m doing this for her sake! Especially since she’s a sweet girl, and I’m unhappy with you for a reason.”
Noah slinks into himself, and my heart breaks into a sprint.
“What are you even talking about, Mom?” Rainn rubs my arm, her protective, nurturing pheromones flooding my nose.
Lilian leans toward me. “I do think you’re a kind wolf, Aliya, but I’m not sure anyone is cut out to deal with my eldest. This pack is doomed without my mate.”
I can’t help it - I’m furious. I grip my napkin, focusing as hard as I can on keeping my voice neutral. “I’m sure things are different when any leadership changes, and I know it must’ve been horrific for your family. But I don’t appreciate how you’re talking about Noah. I’m not ‘dealing with’ your son. I’m his mate.”
“And a pity it is for you.”
Noah’s chest puffs, and I wrap my arm around his bicep. Through the shared pain in our bond, Lilian’s words sting me too.
But Lilian grips the table, ready to dig further. “He’s quiet. Guarded. So inflexible with his personal opinions about traditions to the point where he’s always clashing with respectable wolves. A bad name for Alphas everywhere.”
Noah scoffs, but I speak my mind before anyone else has a chance to talk over me.
“Because he cares about the pack. Like you do.”
“No one would know it. Hardly says a word. You didn’t see me stop talking when I was traumatized.”
Is Lilian implying that Noah stopped talking after a traumatic event? That’s not her information to share. I’m so shocked by her callousness that I can only stare; my thoughts whir too fast to form words out of them. Rainn’s wide eyes only sting my heart harder - the disappointing reality settling in.
Panic shoots through our bond. Noah jerks upright, bumping his thighs into the table and spilling my water glass all over me. He catches it, but it’s too late to keep me from being drenched, ice cubes toppling out after the frigid drink douses my thighs.
Noah gasps. “I-I’m s-sorry!”
I quickly soak most of the water with Noah’s napkin. “It’s okay! It just was an accident–”
Guilt seeps into our bond as he dries my wet lap, his face bright red. Then he turns to leave like his life depends on it.
Lilian scoffs. “You’re blowing me off, again? I forgot to mention he always leaves when it’s convenient for him. How can you lead when–”
It’s my turn to stand, glaring at Lilian. “Oh, he can leave whenever he wants to. But I’m not done talking to you.”
Noah freezes in the doorway. His breath is jagged as he glances between Lilian and me.
“I don’t see the point. I know you don’t understand why yet, but he’s not healthy. I’m just trying to warn you,” Lilian says.
Rainn is crying now, shuddering through hot tears. “Seriously, Mom? This isn’t what I came for.”
My stomach burns. Rainn is right. Lilian isn’t rubbing Noah’s trauma in his face for another second. No wonder Noah keeps his thoughts to himself.
I’m so angry that my voice shakes. “It’s obvious you’re bringing up something personal without his permission.”
“Something personal?” Lilian laughs. “You’re his mate, aren’t you? Or did you just bite him like a clueless pup?”
Her words burn, prompting Noah’s figure to tense in the distance. But after everything Noah promised me, I can’t let this go.
“Maybe I am clueless. But I sure as hell don’t own my mate.” I blink away the dizziness of my racing breath.
I know this game. She’s distracting me. Flinging personal insults until I forget myself and say something I don’t mean.
But this game is familiar. And I hate how familiar it feels for Noah.
I straighten my back, circling back to the actual problem at hand. “Trauma changes the brain. I can’t believe you’re acting like he changed on purpose.” My spine alights with electricity as my wolf speaks through me, warping my voice into a growl. “I’ll never be embarrassed by my mate experiencing trauma. I’m only embarrassed for you that you’ve held that against your own son.”
Lilian rises. Her infuriated pheromones shrink me. “You think I don’t care about Noah? Look at my face. I’ve protected him my whole life, and I have scars to prove it.”
“That doesn’t give you an excuse to be cruel now!”
“Come back to me when your mate dies and your big, tough Alpha son wasn’t there to do anything about it.”
I shudder as Noah’s emotions darken past anything I’ve felt in our bond. Noah bolts from the building, slipping from my sight.