Chapter 34
Chapter Thirty-Four
~DEX~
Oh, how quickly someone’s world can be turned upside down. In all the ways that my relationship with Amelia could have been screwed up, Elise showing up was not on my bingo card. I can’t believe she came there and spoke to Amelia that way. Aired my dirty laundry that I never told her about.
Yes, questions had been asked about my divorce, but I was always careful with the answers.
Never really giving her the real reasons for why it ended.
I was ashamed of my actions and worried that if she knew that, she would react exactly as she did.
And whatever it is we were building would be over.
Just as it is now. She told me to leave and didn’t want to hear me out.
The only place that I could go is work. Here I am now, sitting in my office at the Blaze, wishing that I could turn back time.
Change things, and maybe if I had been nicer to Elise when she came into the apartment or even picked up any one of her damned phone calls, I could have avoided all of this.
But I didn’t and look where that has left me.
Alone.
Completely and utterly alone. Not that I don’t deserve it in some way, but it still stings, nonetheless. I pick up my phone, spinning it in my hand a few times before unlocking it to send a text.
Dex: Hey, are you still in town by chance?
I hit send and wait for Elise to get back to me. Thankfully, I don’t have to wait long.
Elise: Yes, my flight doesn’t leave for another 4 hours.
Good, maybe we can talk.
Dex: There’s a diner near the airport; would you want to meet? Talk.
I sigh and wait for her to respond.
Elise: Sure. Give me 20.
I nod and tear out of my office. My trip over to the diner will be longer than hers.
I check my messages from August; nothing yet. Thankfully, he’s letting me stay with him and he went to pick up my belongings. I wanted to do it, but he felt that it would be best if I wasn’t there to see her. He’s probably right, but it doesn’t erase my need to see her and talk to her.
But that will come in time. First, I need to talk to Elise.
I make it to the diner and find that she’s sitting in a booth in the back. There’s a cup of coffee in front of her and a menu off to the side. I join her and watch as she lifts a perfectly manicured hand and waves down the waitress.
“My husband is here, please bring him some coffee too,” she tells the waitress who answered her call.
“Husband?” I question her.
She shakes her head. “Sorry, it’s a habit and technically true since these haven’t been filed.” She pats her bag that must house the papers beside her in the booth.
I nod. “Might want to try and break that habit so that you can move on with your life, Elise. You do deserve to be happy.”
“Yeah, I suppose I do. I never figured that you would make yourself happy so quickly.” She leans back in the booth, appraising me for a moment before asking, “Did our marriage mean anything to you? I mean you slept with god knows how many women while we were married and then you move here and meet the soccer player so quickly.”
“Yes, our marriage meant a lot to me in the beginning, Elise. It really did. But you and I started living separate lives and we weren’t us anymore,” I tell her.
“We did, and I know that. You didn’t want to be that husband that attends charity events with his wife. Going home every night to a wife that didn’t work; attended charity lunches, served on committees and played golf at the club,” she admits.
“I didn’t. No, I didn’t. You were such an accomplished student. You graduated with honors, I just couldn’t reconcile how someone that driven would want to sit at home, go to lunch and have tea. I thought you would have wanted more than that,” I explain.
“So, you cheated because I wasn’t driven enough?” she asks, shaking her head.
“No, that’s not why. Our lives, weren’t what I thought they were going to be.
I could tell that you were resenting me for spending so much time at work.
Or hanging out with the people I worked with.
The truth is, I was doing it to avoid being at home with you.
Because when I was there, it seemed like I was your whole life.
There was no space, nothing else. You and I would go to dinners, benefits and all these other events where I had to dress up in the monkey suit.
I didn’t want that. And I honestly had no idea how we got there. ”
“Me neither. I guess we weren’t the best at communicating with one another, huh?” she asks.
“Well, I remember you tried. You really tried, but I got angry and shut you down.” The waitress delivers my coffee, so I take a breath until I’m sure she’s cleared out.
“That was the beginning of the end. I wouldn’t listen to you or talk to you about how I was feeling.
I felt trapped in a relationship, sure, but I never tried to fix that with you. And that’s on me.”
“Wow. I never thought I would ever hear you admit to that. I didn’t exactly help either, though.
You never knew that I hadn’t intended to work,” she admits.
“Well, at least not right away, I pushed so hard all throughout my schooling that I wanted a break. We had my trust fund, and I saw that as an opportunity to relax and breathe for a bit.”
I nod. “And I never talked to you without fighting about it. So how could you explain anything to me? Why would you want to, if you knew that it was going to immediately turn into a fight?”
“That’s true. And then by the time I was ready to start going back to work, into our second year of marriage, I figured out that you were cheating on me. I decided if you were going to cheat on me then I was going to stop working and piss you off further.”
“And it did, trust me, it did,” I say laughing. “But by that time, I was chasing that high and acceptance that I found when I was inside someone else.” I see her grimace at my choice of phrasing. “Sorry, that was rude of me to put it like that.”
“No, I’m a big girl. Say it however you want. Besides, it’s not like it matters anymore.”
“It still does to me because I never gave you a proper apology for everything. That night that we called it quits, and I went to stay at work, I never said I was sorry,” I remind her.
It’s Elise’s turn to laugh at me. “No, you sure didn’t.
I think your words were, ‘Oh, so now you know that I’ve been sleeping around.
Guess we’re getting a divorce.’ I thought that was the funniest way to say it, but I agreed with you that we were, and you left that night.
” She shrugs her shoulders and adds, “You know, I never even really cried after we agreed to divorce. I mean, I cried like a baby when I found out that you were cheating those first few times, that was enough to kill me. Then I cried. But not over the divorce and I think that’s because our marriage was already ending. ”
I nod, “It sure was. How did you figure it out? How did you know I was cheating on you all those years?”
She watches me for a beat. “You’re not going to like this.”
“I don’t care. Just tell me.” I take a sip of my coffee and look around at the other patrons in the diner. No one else appears to be having a heartfelt conversation with their ex-wife. They are all sitting there eating, enjoying the good food and conversation.
“I had you followed at first, when I had suspicions. A private investigator was able to give me some intel. And then Drake, your assistant, apparently knew all about your extra-curricular activities. He was pissed because he went for the same job as you. You got it, right out of PA school and he didn’t.
Even though he worked there for so long.
So, he was more than happy to tell me everything. ”
“Asshole.”
“Yeah, he may have been. But he was useful to me, letting me know that I wasn’t going crazy, that you really were cheating.” She bites her lip and then continues. “If it helps, I didn’t feel good about it. I wanted enough evidence so that I had peace of mind.”
“Peace of mind in knowing that I was cheating on you?” I scoff.
“Yes, peace of mind in knowing that I wasn’t making it all up in mind.”
“Makes sense.” I sigh.
“Why did you really ask me here, Dex? What is this really about? Are you looking for me to explain to your girlfriend that we really are divorced now?”
I shake my head, “No, no that’s not it. I realized that I never apologized to you about all I put you through.
I confirmed it. I never apologized, I never said I was sorry.
” I swallow hard. “I am really sorry for all the cheating and lying. That wasn’t fair to you.
I should have left you, not cheat on you until you couldn’t take it anymore.
That isn’t fair. I’m really sorry, Elise. ”
She gives me a shy smile. “Wow, Dex. I never thought that I would ever get that kind of an apology from you. It means a lot, it really does. I guess it was unfair to you, the way I handled things this morning.”
“I call it karma. I was probably due for some bad karma. And you have certainly earned the right to be the one who gives it to me.”
“We had some good times though, right? It wasn’t all bad. I wasn’t the world’s worst wife, right?”
“No, you weren’t,” I admit. “I think we should have communicated better. It wasn’t you; it was me too. We shouldn’t have gotten married.”
“So, this divorce is a blessing,” she says with a laugh.
“I think so.” I run a hand down my face.
“Good to know.” She pauses for a moment then rises.
“I’m going to go. While I still have this last nice memory with you.
And I promise, should you move on again, or get back with your soccer girl, I will stay far away.
I have no intentions of coming to wreck your life.
Heck, I didn’t even mean to really do it this morning. ”
“Oh, come on, part of you found that fun.”
She shrugs, “Yes, part of me did.”
I stand up and hold my arms out to her. “One last hug?”
“Sure,” Elise slowly steps into my arms.
I squeeze her tight and kiss the top of her head. “Take care of yourself, Elise.”
“You too, Dex.”
I watch Elise walk away and I shoot August a text.
Dex: You back at your place now?
He answers immediately.
August: Yep, me and your stuff are here.
I send a thumbs up and head to what will be my new home until August can find me something else.
August’s house is exactly what I expected it to be.
It’s in a building in downtown Tampa, that has a doorman.
The living space is vast and open. The couches aren’t leather, which does surprise me, but he has sports memorabilia hanging all over.
I see there’s a framed picture of the Blaze standing with August.
I walk over and see if I can find Amelia in it. I can. I find her rather quickly; it’s like my eyes are drawn to her. She is slightly bent, hands resting on her knees, grinning at the camera.
“If I catch you beating off to the picture, I will kick you out,” August teases me, coming from the hallway.
“Fuck off, man, you won’t,” I reply back, giving him the finger in the process.
“Sure, you won’t.” He walks over and claps me on the back. “How are you doing?”
I sigh. “Well, in the span of the last eight hours, I’ve had to see my ex-wife twice and lost Amelia. So not so great.”
“Why did you see her twice?”
“I met her while she was waiting for her flight. I felt that I owed her an apology for everything,” I say with a shrug.
“Wow, how did that go?”
“Yeah, it went well. I owned up to things, and she accepted my apology.” I move to sit on this couch. “You know, I never said I was sorry for cheating on her like that. I acknowledged that she knew and left her.”
“Guess it’s good that you got some closure then.”
“I think so. I hope it was more helpful for her than me. She deserves at least that much. Maybe now she can move on.”
“Like you did?” he asks, pouring us each a glass of amber liquid.
I nod. “Yeah, like I tried to do and failed miserably at.”
“Because you lost her not because you’re doubting her?”
“Yep, that would be why.” I take a sip of the amber liquid and discover it’s smooth. “This is nice.”
“Thanks, it’s some pretty old Scotch. I got it as a gift when we opened the stadium.”
“Thanks for sharing.”
“You’re welcome.” He watches me for a moment. “You know, I saw her when I was cleaning out your room.”
“How is she?” Hearing he saw her sends a weight crashing into my chest. The dull ache doesn’t fade — it clings to every breath, in and out.
“She’s hurt. She looked like hell. Hendrix and Mac were there helping her clean up the mess you left in her kitchen.
So that was nice.” He pauses and then adds, “But she seems so sad.
I think meeting Elise really shook her. Not because you were married over a damn technicality but because she had to face your ex-wife and Elise is, well, Elise.
“Yeah, she wasn’t the nicest to either of us. But that’s Elise.”
“You never should have married her,” August admits.
“You never liked her, did you?”
“I did not. But I never wanted to tell you that I thought marrying her was a bad idea. But you’re here now and we can figure this whole thing out as we go. Maybe even get Amelia back for you.”
“Really, you’d actually help me with that?” I say leaning on the edge of my seat.
“Like I told her, I like you two together. We have to figure out how to fix your fuck-up.”
“I appreciate that.” I look around this apartment. “I mean, your place is nice, but I never saw myself in a place with a doorman. Are you ever going to find me an apartment?”
He nods. “Yeah, I can probably have you something by the end of the week. So don’t get too comfortable here.”
“How is that possible? I thought it was going to take a while. Did you always have the ability to place me that quickly?”
August grins. “Truth is, yes. Amelia’s could have been for a few nights. But I could tell there was chemistry there the first day you met her, so I figured what harm could it do. I was happy when I was right. I never imagined it happening like this.” He shrugs. “Are you mad?”
“No, not mad. I’m glad I came here to work with you, August. This was one of the smartest decisions I’ve made.”
He hold his glass up and clinks mine. “What did I always say? You gotta stick with me because I know what I’m doing. Or some shit like that.”
I laugh and agree. “You do, August. You really do.”