Chapter 38
Chapter Thirty-Eight
~DEX~
“Idon’t know what else to tell you, Dex. If it were me, I would have cut bait by now and moved onto someone else,” August tells me.
We’re sitting in his living room, and I’m asking him yet again if he has seen Amelia and if he knows how she is doing.
The only contact that I’ve had with her is updates from Lucas about how her therapy is going.
He said that it’s going slow. I’m worried that the slowing down of her progress is because of us.
But I can’t be sure, unless I evaluate her, which she doesn’t want. So, I’m at a loss right now.
Hence, why I’m talking to August again.
“Yeah, because that has worked out so well with you and Hendrix. You two are the epitome of healthy exes,” I remind him.
“Hendrix is the exception. She’s still so angry with me,” he remarks.
“She is. I don’t want that with Amelia.”
“Then you have to talk to her. There is no other way around it,” he says, his tone bored. I can tell he’s getting tired of answering questions about her and giving me the same advice over and over again. Maybe it’s time I took it.
But I want to be sure.
“Alright, well, if we’re done with this session of Amelia therapy, I have to go with my father to a charity dinner.” He straightens his bow tie. “Do I look okay?”
“You look ravishing,” I tease him.
August shoots me the middle finger. “Have a good night and play nice with others.”
“See ya!” I wait until the door shuts before I pick up the phone and text Jase.
Dex: Hey, man, feel like meeting for a beer? I want to talk to you about something.
I start to get up to go find my sneakers when my phone chimes. Thankfully, it’s not long.
Jase: Hey, sure, we can do that. Cassie is over, mind if she comes along?
I grin when I see his reply. Having Cassie there might be helpful.
Dex: Not at all, see you at the Backwoods in twenty?
Jase: Sure thing.
Great. I leave August’s immediately and head over to the Backwoods so that I can claim a table in the back, in case any of the other Blaze team members or Amelia’s friends happen to come out tonight.
Once I arrive I order a pitcher of the dark beer I know Jase likes and enough glasses for the three of us.
“Now we wait,” I say to myself, as I scroll on my phone while trying to casually watch the door.
It doesn’t take long for Jase and Cassie to get to the bar. I stand up and wave them over. Jase spots me and waves. I watch as he reaches behind and grabs Cassie’s hand, leading her over to my table I’m at. I watch the simple action, the way he looks back at her and her face lights up. I miss that.
And that’s why Jase and Cassie are here, because maybe they can help me either get Amelia back or find a way to let her go.
“Hey, man,” Jase says when they reach me.
“Hey, thanks for coming, guys. Good to see both of you,” I tell them.
“You too, buddy,” Jase replies, grabbing a bar stool.
“Hey, Dex,” Cassie says quietly.
I notice she seems a bit uncomfortable being here with me and Jase, so I say, “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to put you in an awkward position, Cassie. I needed to talk to someone. I’m not sure what to do here. August said I should try to move on, but I don’t know. I don’t think that I can do that.”
Cassie smiles. “I figured that was what this is about.”
I pour them both a beer and pass them over.
“Thanks, man,” Jase replies.
“Yeah, thanks,” Cassie echoes. “Now, what do you want to know?”
I grin. “How is she?”
Cassie speaks first. “She’s doing her best. What happened that morning wasn’t easy for her, as you can imagine. And now she has a lot of doubt about what was real during the time you two were together. She spends a lot of her time comparing herself to Elise.”
I’m shocked at what Cassie openly shares. I thought this might be something I would have had to pry out of her.
I nod. “I wish I could talk to her.”
“What would you say?” she asks.
“I would tell her that I love her and that everything I feel for her is real,” I begin.
“Were you ever going to tell her about how your marriage ended?” Cassie asks.
“Cas—” Jase begins, but I shake my head.
“No, it’s okay. She has every right to ask those questions.
She’s one of Amelia’s best friends and it’s perfectly fine for her to ask,” I say.
Her loyalty lies with Amelia, as it should.
Not with me. “I was planning on telling her what happened to my marriage.” Cassie gets ready to speak, but I hold my hand up to silence her.
“I know that I should have done it sooner, before we slept together, but I didn’t.
I was afraid of what she would think of me.
I’m not saying I don’t deserve her judgement.
I don’t know how to overcome my fear of it. ”
Jase says, “I get it. I understand. There’s a stigma when you’ve been divorced. Some people don’t want anything to do with a man who’s divorced, regardless of the reason. And some people can’t keep their hands to themselves.” He winks at Cassie. She blushes.
Cassie sighs, “I told you once that I thought you were a good man, and I stand behind that comment, Dex. I think you are a good man. I think that you got caught up in this relationship and the idea of a blank slate, and that blew up in your face.”
I nod. “I wish I would have picked up the phone when Elise called me. She called me so many times before showing up on my doorstep, but I couldn’t pick up.”
“Why?” Cassie asks me, leaning forward. “This all could have been avoided.”
“I wasn’t sure what she wanted and frankly, I didn’t want to know.
” I scrub a hand down my face. “I thought the only reason that she could be calling me is because she either wanted to do the ‘ex’s backslide’ thing or she wanted to bitch me out for being a lousy husband.
Either way, I didn’t want to hear any of it. ”
Jase nods, agreeing with me. “I don’t blame you.
Had I seen my ex’s name flashing up on my caller ID I wouldn’t have picked up either.
Nothing good could have come from a phone call from an ex.
How were you to know that it was because of a missing signature on a paper?
Your lawyer should have known and contacted you, not her. ”
“He was out of the country. That is what Elise said when she got there. I called the office later and followed up with them, and his legal secretary confirmed it. She also confirmed that they were aware of the missing signature. She was very apologetic but said that it had been worked out with Elise’s attorney that she would get that signature.
I asked why no one contacted me so that I knew to expect it.
Apparently, no one thought that Elise was looking for it personally.
They thought it was going to be a lawyer or legal aid doing it.
I guess that’s where she got one over on everyone,” I say, shaking my head.
“And blew up the new life that you had started here in Tampa,” Jase confirms.
“Yep,” I reply, taking a sip of my beer.
“And it’s not that Elise was mean to Amelia.
She was being Elise. The know-it-all with the superior attitude who enjoyed the fact that she caught me with someone.
That was, I think, the best part to her because I hurt her, and now she had a chance to hurt me.
Unfortunately, for Amelia, she was collateral damage.
Elise was all too happy to put the nail in the coffin of our relationship. ”
I take long pull of my beer, waiting for Jase and Cassie to say something.
“In her mind, you got what you deserved, I’m sure,” Cassie says, breaking the silence. “So, you don’t want to know how she’s doing. You want her back. Am I right?”
I nod vigorously. “Yes, I’d like her back. If you think she would have me.”
“I don’t know, you hurt her pretty bad,” Cassie admits.
“She is still a mess. Girls’ night the other night wasn’t exactly a fun night of talking and laughing like it normally is.
Amelia is missing that spark that makes her Amelia.
You stole that from her. I’m not sure that you have earned another shot. ”
“Cas, we can’t be that judge,” Jase says, carefully placing his hand over hers. “I mean, I love Amelia. She’s great, but Dex didn’t cheat on her. And I almost feel like that’s how she’s acting.”
“I think she feels cheated because I wasn’t technically divorced when we were together.” I remind them.
“But you didn’t know that.” Jase says. “I agree with Cassie, I don’t think you’re a bad guy.
I think you weren’t honest with her and that bit you in the ass.
I mean, should you have told her why you were getting a divorce, well, that’s up to you.
But the whole still married thing was a legal error and not something you kept from her.
I think the situation that morning got out of hand, and she never gave you a chance to explain yourself.
Because when she found out about your past, she was worried that you would cheat on her too.
If you could cheat on Elise, it’s very likely you could cheat on her. That caused a whole lot of hurt.”
Cassie is staring at him for a bit like she’s processing it. I, however, grin at Jase.
“Thank you for saying that. I was worried that you all felt like I was the devil and any chance I had developing friendships outside of August was over.”
Jase shakes his head. “You may not be hanging out with the whole crew, but I’ll hang with you, because I like you. I’m not damning you for making mistakes.”
I smile at him and say, “Thanks.” I look over at Cassie.
“I get it if you don’t feel the same way, I really do.
Your loyalty is to Amelia, as it should be.
But please know that I miss her so fucking much.
I want to her to know that I am a good person.
How do I go about doing that? There has to be something.
She made me feel things that I haven’t felt before.
I was happier with her in those few short weeks than I was in my whole marriage.
So please, if you know what I can do, please tell me. ”
Cassie sighs and takes a sip of her beer. “I knew I liked you.”
“Does that mean you’ll help me?”
She laughs out loud. “Yes, that means that I will help you. But you have to help yourself, which means you have to stop avoiding her. You have to say what you are saying to us to her. She is the one that needs to hear this. Don’t get me wrong, I like hearing it.
I knew I liked you,” she repeats. “Hell, you took her and bought her fucking books.”
I laugh and say, “Yeah, I thought she could use some new ones since she’s still recovering.”
“That was a nice gesture. She is reading them,” Cassie tells me.
I grin. “I was worried that she wouldn’t keep them. I hoped that wasn’t the case because she was so happy when I got them for her.”
“Oh, she kept them and she’s reading them,” she confirms.
“So how do I make sure I get to see her again?” I ask them both.
“I think there’s an easy solution to that.
Assign Lucas something else to do when she is supposed to have some PT, perform it yourself.
That’s how you get some time with her. You might have to start out small, but it’s better than this no-contact situation,” Jase says with a grin. Cassie is nodding and smiling.
“You know, I can see her looking for you when she’s at the Blaze. She looks for you on the practice field, when we’re walking the halls and in the team room. She looks for you.” She repeats the words, and each time I hear them, my heart sings.
I grin at her, “Yeah, that’s brilliant. I can do that.”
“You really couldn’t have thought of that one on your own?” Cassie says, laughing at me. “I thought that one was pretty obvious.”
“I wasn’t sure that it would work. I thought she was angry with me, and I would be the last one that she would want to see,” I confess.
“At first, yes, but I think now you could,” Cassie confirms.
“Great, then that’s what I’ll do.” My knee bounces nervously under the table, hoping that the simple plan that’s been crafted works.
“When is she scheduled to be in there at the next game day, when you all play the Houston Dash? I can have Lucas do something else and I’ll work with her. ” I grin widely.
Jase nods. “I like it.”
“Think it will work?” I ask them both.
“It’s a start and a step in the right direction, Dex. Give her time, though. Don’t rush and don’t push her,” Cassie warns me. “She is fragile.”
My heart seizes. I hate that I’m the one who made her that way. I took a sweet, beautiful woman and made her fragile. I have got to make up for that.
“I’m not saying I’m the answer. I’m not arrogant enough to believe that, but I will try to fix what I broke, and I’ll never hurt her again, if she gives me the chance,” I promise them.
Jase claps me on the back. “I hope this works. After everything that you have been through, and Amelia, you both deserve a happy ending.”
Cassie nods in agreement. “You both do.”
“I’m sure this goes without saying, but please don’t tell her what my plans are. Or hint around that I want to talk to her or anything like that,” I ask them.
Cassie nods.
“You got it,” Jase replies.
“Thank you. Thank you both so much.”
We spend the rest of the night shooting the shit.
Jase and I talk about our experiences playing ball-him soccer and me football.
It actually turns out to be a nice night.
It’s a hell of a lot better than staring at the wall or crying into my protein shake.
But that is all about to change because now I have a plan. I hope it works.