Chapter 6
Chapter Six
Liliana
I nodded at Javier, the cartel guard at the door.
“Senora Ruiz?” He appeared puzzled by my presence and suitcase.
Feigning a smile wasn’t possible. “It’s José.” The lump in my throat grew. “He’s…” I took a breath. “They believe a heart attack.”
Anguish showed in his stare. “Senora, lo lamento.”
“I’ll be staying here for the next few days until…” I wasn’t certain how to finish that sentence.
“Of course. You’ll be safe here. Senora Pérez?”
I hadn’t thought about where Renata would stay. “I’ll text her and invite her to stay with me.”
Javier was a regular guard for the apartments; however, I knew he did other work for el Patrón and the cartel.
I imagined he’d caused deaths as well as seen them.
Nevertheless, his remorse at José’s unexpected demise was evident.
If I hadn’t lived my entire life within the cartel, I might make assumptions about the men who lived in service of el Patrón.
I had.
I didn’t.
The information would be in my office, but I didn’t need to check it. I knew there were four empty apartments—bedrooms really. During the conversion, twenty apartments, each capable of housing three women were constructed. Each apartment contained a common room and a common bathroom.
We had one completely empty apartment and one with one empty bedroom. I chose the completely empty apartment. If Renata wanted to stay with me, she could. If not, I’d have more privacy. Wandering down the empty hallways, my mind was scrambled with too much information.
Had Nick Ruiz actually proposed marriage?
It wouldn’t be a real marriage but a legal one.
While in my apartment, I felt something akin to passion as Nick stared at me while I was in only my panties, but that didn’t mean I was ready for…
I walked past numerous apartment doors. On the nameplates were the resident’s first names.
Those women, most if not all of them were currently at the cartel’s club Wanderland. Their job was sex.
I supported their choices yet couldn’t fathom what they did, day after day, night after night.
Once, I’d broached the subject with Reina who works in the offices.
She shrugged and laughed, saying something about how making noise encourages the men to ejaculate faster.
She said she imagines a racetrack, the faster he pumps, the faster the cars were moving.
Her noises were her way of cheering for the first-place driver.
If she was truly into the race, his speed increased. ”
I’d shaken my head in a nonjudgmental way.
My experience was so completely different. My mother’s advice before my marriage was to comply and submit. I’d hoped that Gerardo would have had pity on an inexperienced woman the age of his daughter. He hadn’t.
To be honest, I’d only read about female orgasms. They sounded amazing in romance books. Actors on television made them out to be earth-shaking. As far as I was concerned, they were fables, fake news, or fiction—maybe all three rolled into one.
The library and dining room were dark.
My shoes clipped the floor, the clack echoing off the walls as I went to Apartment 17.
Three empty nameplates told me what I already knew.
This apartment was currently uninhabited.
Pushing the door open, I flipped the light switch.
The standard common room came into view.
There was a sofa with two chairs facing a big screen television.
Behind the sofa was a small rectangular table with four chairs.
Four was funny since the apartment held three bedrooms.
I went to the far bedroom, one of the ones with a window, and flipped another light switch.
A standard twin-sized bed, bedside stand, dresser, and small desk were present.
Lifting my suitcase to the bed, I unzipped the sides.
Removing my clothes, I slowly turned, remembering Nick’s stare as I did the same thing earlier.
Even without his presence, goose bumps materialized, and my nipples hardened. Without rational thought, I lowered my fingers beneath the waistband of my panties. I couldn’t think about what I was doing. I’d never done it before.
With my eyes closed, I concentrated on Nick’s dark stare.
My fingers found my folds. I bit my lip, fumbling for what seemed an unobtainable goal.
A gasp escaped my lips as I slowly swirled my clit.
My insides tightened and twisted. I bounced with a newfound rhythm.
One finger and then two penetrated my folds, finding my wet, silky pussy.
The tightening grew almost painful. I pushed up on my tiptoes, one hand against the wall keeping me from falling as my circulation raced and my breathing quickened.
“Oh, oh…” My sounds ricocheted off the walls, warm essence covered my fingers, and my breath eased from my lungs.
It took a minute to get my bearings. Once I did, a sad smile spread across my face. That was an orgasm. I’d finally—a twenty-one-year-old widow—had an orgasm. Guilt overtook me as my thoughts went to Renata and José.
I donned my nightgown and after washing my hands and taking care of business in the bathroom, opened my phone. There was a text message from Izzy.
“I just heard about José. I’m so sorry. You can come stay with us. Valentina wouldn’t mind. Em should have brought you here.”
A smile curled my lips. That was sweet of Izzy.
She and Em were still living with his parents, Andrés and Valentina.
While Izzy said she was ready to move away, for her and Em to have a place of their own; I suspected she wasn’t.
At only nineteen, Izzy enjoyed Valentina’s mothering, and I was certain, Valentina loved having a daughter-in-law in-house, after her two daughters moved to Kansas City.
I sent Renata a text message.
“I’m worried about you. I’m staying at the apartments. The one I’m in is completely empty except for me. There’s a free bedroom if you need someplace to stay.”
I hit send.
Despite the late or early hour, after locking the main door and the door to my bedroom, I lay in the dark as moonlight from the mostly covered windows danced in the shadows.
Nick’s proposal, or whatever it was, played on repeat.
His solution would solve my housing problem, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that it wasn’t fair to him.
Nick Ruiz, top lieutenant in the Roríguez cartel deserved more than a loveless marriage. And maybe, just maybe, I did too. My self-worth was up for debate, but what if Mia was right? What if there was a good man out there who could love me?
Waking to the sound of my alarm, it took me a moment to remember where I was and why.
The happenings of last night came back to me. I reached for my phone, expecting a text message from Renata. There wasn’t one.
There was one from Nick.
“I’ll be by the apartments around noon to check on you.”
I started to reply that I was fine, and he didn’t need to bother, but I stopped. I needed to know if he woke this morning with the realization of his crazy proposal and had changed his mind. That would be the best-case scenario. I texted back.
“I’m okay. I’ll have the kitchen bring lunch to the offices.”