Chapter 4
4
Noelle
I ’m practically vibrating by the time we get to Hiro’s cabin, and I can’t blame it all on the sugar. Watching his strong hands capably maneuver the SUV up the steep, winding road through the falling snow is doing something to my insides.
I’ve always imagined Hiro as a fairytale prince. His dark hair, golden skin, and sharp cheekbones, are like something out of an anime. He looks like the type of guy in a rom-com who the heroine dances with at a masquerade ball, and he lifts his mask and you realize he’s actually the king or something like that. He’s intense, gorgeous, and always seemed about as distant as a guy on a movie screen, until now.
He's not really doing anything special either, but his actions are making my heart beat faster anyway. He might be focused on getting us to the cabin, but somehow I feel like precious cargo.
He keeps shooting me little glances that let me know he’s watching out for me. He caught me shivering once and he turned up the heat, tucking his jacket under my legs a little firmer. He pulled over and dug through our shopping bags, handing me a snack when he saw me trying to reach for something in the back. He’s attuned to me in a way that makes my skin tingle. Every brush of his hand, every one of those half smiles, even his sigh of resignation when I won the war of the car stereo, turning it to a station playing all Christmas music, made my belly flutter.
But now we’re at the cabin. In the middle of nowhere. It’s a log cabin that could pull double-duty in a Hallmark Christmas special – all it needs is a golden retriever with a red bow frolicking in the fresh, fallen snow, and a pair of skis leaning against the front porch. But there isn’t a Christmas light or decoration in sight.
It’s big enough, I suppose, but nothing close to the chalet Baxter bought last year for his ski obsession. It’s not big enough for me to pretend that my old crush on Hiro hasn’t roared back to life in a very non-childish way. My fairytale fantasy has changed over the last few hours from having Hiro walk into one of the boring formal events we always have to attend and asking me to dance to having Hiro walk in, whisk me away in a big, black vehicle and spank me until I’m promising to be a good girl.
I swallow hard, clenching my thighs together.
“Does it hurt?” Hiro finishes bringing in the last of the bags and closes the door against the swirl of snow.
My mouth goes dry at the question, heat rising in my cheeks. My entire body is vibrating from awareness of being in the same place as Hiro. Alone. Very much alone. Is it too much to hope that there might only be one bed in this place?
Hiro points at my knees. “Are they worse?”
Oh, he’s not talking about the ache low in my belly at the thought of being here with him for the next however many days. I nod to cover my flustered reaction. “Right.” I clear my throat, awkwardly. “They’re sore, yes.” I give an exaggerated wince, heading into what looks like a living room, complete with comfortable looking dark wood furniture and over-stuffed couches.
I’m suddenly, terribly self-consciously aware that I’m standing in Hiro’s cabin in ripped tights and a too-short skirt, my hair a tangled mess and I probably reek of beer. More than one partygoer bumped into me last night. The combination of my sugary breakfast, too much alcohol from last night, the weirdness of Karli’s new boyfriend and Hiro’s arrival is making my temples throb. I rub my forehead, not really knowing what to do. I turn to see Hiro unpacking our stuff.
“Can I help?”
“You won’t know where anything goes.” He doesn’t glance up. “Why don’t you have a seat?”
I watch as he opens a cupboard, noting the cereal boxes lined up meticulously, like soldiers in a line. The box of cereal I picked out doesn’t fit.
Of course.
“How come there’s food already here? Did you drive down to get me?”
He shakes his head, trying to move some of the stuff around, but it’s apparent to me that it’s not going to slide in to his neatly organized cabinet. He’s going to have to leave it out on the counter. I eye the perfectly bare charcoal granite. That’s going to drive him nuts.
“No, someone stocks the cabin for me the day before I come up.” He sets the cereal box down before picking it up again, frowning down at the colorful cartoon drawing on the front. “You were the only thing unplanned.”
“Oh.”
His head snaps up. “I didn’t mean it like that. I’m happy to help Henry.”
I bite my lip. Of course, this is just a favor to my brother, like holding onto a package. I shake it off, poking around in one of the bags for something to wear. “Is there somewhere I can shower?”
He straightens. “Yes, of course.” He points at the open staircase. “Up the stairs to the left. Take your pick.”
I climb the stairs, my eyes widening at the bookcases that line the open area at the top. There’s a cozy reading nook I wouldn’t mind settling into later. I go left, noting the two guest bedrooms on either side of the hallway. Maybe this place isn’t as small as I initially thought.
I step into one room, the cream-colored walls and old-fashioned quilt on the bed drawing me in. It’s simply decorated but feels cozy and inviting, and I’m drawn to the window where I can see snow softly falling outside on green trees. There’s even a lake, its unfrozen surface a dark gray with silver ripples in the distance.
I put the few things I carried upstairs on the bench at the end of the bed. My phone lights up and I see several messages from Karli.
I hesitate, looking at the door. My friend must be worried. I think about the knife I saw flashing in the dark. I’m worried about her . Did she know Tom was violent? Did he do anything to her? She must be okay if she’s texting me, right? I clench my fist, Hiro’s warnings echoing in my head.
I flip my phone over so I can’t see the notifications. Everything is so quiet here. It’s a far cry from my apartment on campus, where I might technically live alone, but Karli and my other friends are always around. Plus, in an apartment building you can always hear other stuff going on, not just from residents, but from outside. A dog barking. A siren wailing. Here it's like everything is muted by the snow. Even when I’m home, with so many siblings, cousins, friends, and the house staff, it’s never quiet, no matter which property I happen to find myself.
I press my forehead against the glass, the cold easing the ache there and just watch the snow steadily falling for a minute. Is Henry just being paranoid? I don’t pretend to know everything he does to keep our various holdings and business interests organized and profitable. I imagine it’s a lot like running several countries at once, at least that’s how our father used to describe it. I squeeze my eyes shut. No matter where Daddy was in the world, we were always together for Christmas.
A shuddery breath escapes me, and I head for the bathroom, stripping off my clothes. Goosebumps race across my skin when my feet touch the chilly tile floor and I switch the shower on, letting the hot steam rise around me. The shower matches the rustic feel of the cabin, an alcove of natural stone with a large skylight so it feels like I’m standing outside when I step in and gaze up.
I rake my hands through my hair, tugging at the tangles before I soap up with a bar that smells like I’m walking in the woods. The hot water stings the raw skin at my knees, and I wish I could call Karli and ask what is going on. Is that Tom guy her new boyfriend? Why did he follow us out to the parking lot? What happened after we left?
The water beats down on my shoulders, easing the tension from the long drive and I sigh, arching my back and turning to let the heat wash down my front, my breasts heavy and sensitive.
A sudden wave of dizziness hits me, and I reach for the ledge holding the soap and bottles. I breathe shallowly, slowly rinsing the soap out of my hair and switch the water off.
I step out onto the soft towel and sink to my knees. I should have had more than candy for breakfast. Nausea washes through me.
I definitely should have been more careful about what I ate, considering the drinks I had last night. I shiver in the cool air, water trickling around me from the ends of my hair as I suck in streams of air between my teeth.
“Noelle?”
I flinch as the door swings open. How fucking embarrassing. Naked on the floor with some combination of low blood sugar and a hangover. “Get out,” I mumble.
A warm towel wraps around my back. “Did you fall?”
“No, I’m just sick and stupid. Leave me alone.”
Gentle fingers comb my wet hair back from face, and a soft towel covers my head, those deft hands working some kind of fancy towel origami that wouldn’t be out of place at my usual salon. “I’m going to pick you up, Noelle. If you feel like you need to throw up, just tell me.”
Hiro lifts me like I weigh next to nothing and cuddles me against his chest, striding into the bedroom. I’m caught somewhere between mortification and relief as he lowers me to the soft bed and the shivery feeling passes.
“What happened?” he asks.
I bite my lip. “Maybe one too many drinks and not enough food,” I mumble.
“Did you eat and get enough sleep through your finals?” he inquires, his voice quiet.
I think back over the hectic last couple of weeks. I had three back-to-back exams in a twenty-four-hour period and had to turn in a paper within that same time. My fifth exam gave me some breathing room, but the exam counted for the majority of the final mark, so I couldn’t slack off, not that I would have. Then there were the late-night calls with Karli and getting ready for the end of the year parties… I’m not certain when I last ate a full meal, to be honest.
Hiro smooths the lines across my brow. “You’re probably the one Black who is the most like your brother. He’ll go until he drops too.”
The mattress shifts as Hiro stands. “Are you going to be okay if I leave you for a few minutes?”
“I’m fine.” The room is silent and the soft quilt smells faintly of lavender. My forehead tingles where Hiro brushed his fingers over my skin, and I drift off thinking about the way he carried me in here and his comment about me being too young. Am I imagining the gentleness in his hands when he touches me? Is it wishful thinking or did he actually press his lips to my hair before he put me down?
“Noelle?” His low tone vibrates through me. “You need to eat something.”
My eyes pop open and when I lean up and can drag my eyes past the site of Hiro in soft, gray sweatpants and a rugby shirt I see he’s set up a little side table with a tray. “You get Uber eats up here?” I ask.
He rolls his eyes but there’s a grin tugging at the side of his lips. “I can cook. Did you not see all the groceries downstairs?”
I reach for a small plate filled with crackers, cheese, almonds, and strawberries. “I mostly saw cereal. Don’t you have someone who comes in and cooks for you?”
Hiro shifts to give me access to the table, propping some pillows behind my back for comfort. “I don’t. When I’m here, I like my privacy.”
I pause in the middle of chewing. “Mumph,” I mumble. These strawberries are delicious. I swallow and then glance at Hiro’s muscular thigh, so close to mine. I swallow again. “Sorry I crashed your party for one.”
He shrugs. “I’m happy to help Henry.”
I huff a sigh. “Right. It’s like dog-sitting for your bestie.”
Hiro pauses as he lifts the dome from a plate of scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast. My tummy growls, surprising me. He laughs. “I’m glad you’re feeling better. I was worried when I saw you on the floor.”
“Don’t remind me.” I eagerly tuck into my plate, moaning as I bite into the thick-cut bacon.
Hiro’s jaw tightens and it intrigues me enough to do it again, practically purring as I lick the tiniest bit of salty grease from my lips. “Mmm. You even have bacon treats for your temporary pet.”
Hiro tilts his head, meeting my eyes. “You’re hardly a dog, Noelle.” His gaze drops to my lips. “And if you keep licking your lips like that, I’m going to forget that your brother is my best friend.”
My throat goes tight. “Is that what stopped you before?”
He shakes his head. “No. What stopped me before was your age. What kind of man takes advantage of a sixteen-year-old girl?”
“You’re not that much older than me.”
“Almost a decade. When I walked into that New York party and saw that stupid boy with his hands all over you I wanted to smash something.” Hiro takes a deep breath. “But you were sixteen and he was sixteen and that is perfectly normal. What wasn’t normal was my reaction.”
A tremor shivers through my stomach and it has nothing to do with being sick. “I tried to kiss you that night.”
His lips twist. “Tried? You did kiss me that night.”
Heat floods my cheek and I bite my lip, remembered embarrassment leaving a heavy feeling in my chest. I straighten my shoulders. “You didn’t kiss me back. You pushed me away. It’s not like I was some innocent girl at sixteen anyway.” I was pretty wild, in fact. I look away, suddenly wishing I hadn’t tried to be so much older than I was back then.
Hiro moves closer, lifting his hand and taking my chin, forcing me to look at him. “It doesn’t matter what you did or didn’t do back then. You were sixteen with all the privileges of being a Black and all of the limitations too. Of course, you tried to rebel. But it doesn’t matter how old you looked, or acted, or even what you asked for. I was the adult and I had to protect you.”
“Just like now.”
His eyes search mine. “It’s a little different. We’re both adults now.”
“What would happen if I tried to kiss you now?” I whisper.
“Do you still want to?”
I nod, afraid to take my eyes off his, afraid that if I move, I’ll break this spell. His fingers slide along my jaw, under my ear and tilted my face up to his. “Would you mind if I kissed you instead?”
Before I can even draw in a breath, his mouth is on mine, his lips coaxing mine to open. The kiss is like fireworks, lighting me up everywhere all at once. I tentatively press my tongue against his, my nipples tightening instantly as he groans, deepening the kiss between us.
My towel slips and I arch into his embrace, rubbing myself all over the soft knit of his shirt.
He breaks the kiss, panting as he looks down at me. “Shit. You’re sick and I should be taking care of you.”
I straighten, letting the towel fall away completely. Cool air sweeps across my nipples and the hunger in his gaze makes me bold. “I feel one hundred percent better, but I do need you to take care of me.”
His eyes darken. “Where does it hurt, baby?”
The endearment, uttered in low tones, feels like a caress. I don’t know what’s happening here but if this is the only shot I have with Hiro, I’m going to grab it tight and wring every drop out of the experience.
I glide my hands up my ribcage and lift my breasts, deliberately skating my fingers over the sensitive peaks. “Here,” I rasp.
Hiro covers my hands with his, the warmth sinking into my skin. He molds my fingers around my nipples, using my own nails to rasp the tips before bending over me and sliding his tongue up my cleavage. My head falls back, and he drags his teeth lightly over my collarbone, eliciting a shiver that feels like sinking into a hot bath after coming in out of the rain. A warm glow spreads in my chest. I open my eyes to see Hiro grinning and my belly clenches just as a flood of warmth rushes lower. He leans in, doing it again before kissing and nuzzling higher, making me squirm.
“So sensitive aren’t you baby?”
My pulse kicks up another notch at the dark promise in his voice. I’m not a virgin but somehow this feels different from anything I’ve ever done before.
He lowers me completely to the bed, sweeping his hand under my hair and fanning it out across the pillow. “If you only knew how often I imagined your hair like this, spread out like ribbons of embers for my pleasure.” He dips his head, inhaling. “And scented with my soap.” His breath tickles my ear and I shiver, the movement causing my breasts to brush against his shirt. I’m so sensitive the touch sets off tiny sparks in my body.
“Y-, you fantasized about me?” I can barely form a coherent thought as he finds my breast with his hand, kneading and plumping until the ache between my legs becomes an inferno.
Smoothing the hair away from my forehead, he drops a tender kiss there. My eyes flutter open.
“I’m not a good man, Noelle. I shouldn’t have thought about you like that.”
My eyes go wide at the admission. “I thought I annoyed you.”
The corners of his eyes crinkle. “Oh, you did. Every little flick of your hair, the curve of your lips, the sway of your hips. Your intelligence and your determination to do exactly what pleases you, damn the consequences.” He kisses the tip of my nose. “I was especially annoyed by the fact that you are my best friend’s little sister, and I shouldn’t have noticed any of those things about you at all.”
Wonder washes through me as his hand strokes the side of my face, down my neck and over the curve of my shoulder before brushing against my breast again, gentle, feather-like touches that leave sparks rushing along my skin. I can feel him everywhere at once, the heavy, hot weight of him between my thighs.
“You have too many clothes on,” I whisper, raising my hips against the ridge of his cock.
Hiro presses my hips back down with his. His eyes are dark with desire. “Once I take them off, there’s no going back, Noelle.”
“God, I hope not,” I grind out, the length of him rubbing me in almost the exact right spot, but my hips are pinned, and I can’t move.
“Are you certain? I’m almost ten years older than you and over-bearing, over-protective and crazy about you.”
I pause, but only for a second. It sounds like he’s asking for a whole lot more than whether I’m certain about our current position. Hiro is the one thing I can’t imagine ever getting bored of and if he doesn’t put his hands on me soon, I’m going to die. “Are you certain, Hiro?”
“I’ve never wanted anything more than this.” He drops down, nuzzling my shoulder.
“I want you. I want this.”
His cuddle turns to kisses and the feather soft touches begin again, his fingers trailing over my hip before dipping between our bodies. He groans. “You’re so wet.” Swiping up the center of me, he swirls his thumb over my aching clit, and I shudder. “So wet and needy.”
“Please, Hiro.” I’m panting, every single cell in my body attuned to his.
“I dreamed about how you’d feel, but this surpasses even my most intense fantasies.” He looks down at me. “You’re so soft and warm. Like the best dessert, ever.”
While I watch, he dips inside me and brings his fingers to his mouth, licking them. It’s the hottest thing I’ve ever seen and when he grins at me, mouthing the word ‘delicious’ I nearly melt into the bed. He rolls beside me, spreading my legs wider, and teases my pussy, his fingers moving fast, then slow as he catalogues every twitch and moan I deliver under his ministrations.
I can’t remember the last time something felt this good. I turn, capturing his mouth with mine and kiss him with all the desperation building in my body as his fingers pump slowly in and out of me, pleasure snaking through me.
“You’re so fucking gorgeous when I touch you. You feel so good, like this. Spread your legs a little more, baby.” He hisses out a breath when I do as he says. “Good girl, just like that. Show me how good this feels.” Hiro strokes me, changing the speed of his fingers, watching me closely as he rubs my pussy.
“So soft,” he murmurs. “That’s it, baby, move your hips just like that. Ride my fingers.” His fingers stop their slow exploration, as he settles against my clit, gliding his thumb in a light circle, which makes my legs shake. “I want to feel you come on my fingers, want to feel this greedy little pussy squeeze me before I bury myself deep inside and make you come again on my cock.”
There’s an edge to his voice, like he’s losing control and oh, doesn’t that do amazing things to my body.
“P-please, Hiro.” My body is tightening, spiraling higher, while he whispers filthy things in my ear until my whole body contracts, like a flash reaction I saw once on some science show. His fingers work me through my orgasm, wringing out every little drop of sensation, like he knows my body better than I do.
His fingers slow, gentling, so the pressure isn’t overwhelming, his lips softly brushing against my shoulder. “You did so good, baby, coming apart on my hand.” He continues to pet me, dipping his head to lick at my nipple. “Do you feel better now?”
I’m too dazed to do more than nod, sated and a little sleepy as my heartbeat slows and the warmth of Hiro’s body snuggles into mine. When I looked down at his beautiful, stern face last night in the bar, the last thing I imagined is that I’d end up here, in his arms, my body still tingling from his amazingly talented hands.
I don’t know if this is a Christmas miracle, or some kind of dream I don’t want to wake up from, but whatever it is, I don’t want it to end.