Chapter 10
Chapter Ten
Years ago, I visited Jaeger’s parents’ house when my mom asked me to run up and grab Tyler for a soccer game.
I waited in the entry while Tyler changed into his uniform.
As I recall, Jaeger’s parents were warm and friendly, with awesome Austrian accents.
Jaeger and his sister have American accents, but they were born in the U.S.
, or moved here shortly after—I’m not entirely clear on the details.
Tyler does the honors and knocks on the large, elaborately carved wooden door while Gen and I wait patiently beside him.
I lean closer, taking in the subtle design in front of us.
A landscape of mountains juts toward the sky, with streams, and birds, and all manner of wildlife.
The door flies open and I flinch, my nose too close to the surface.
Mrs. Lang ushers us inside and doesn’t appear surprised at the fact that I nearly fell into her home. She must be used to strangers gaping at her front door.
She grabs my brother in a bear hug. “Tyler, so good to see you!” This actually comes out, Tylar-r, zo goot to see yu! with her Austrian accent. “And Cali, such a beautiful, grown-up woman.” She hugs me too.
I introduce Jaeger’s mother to Gen and we enter the cavernous living room with its massive windows overlooking a breathtaking view of the lake.
I vaguely remember the floor plan of the first level, but the furniture has been updated with plush leather couches, cream woven throw pillows, and blankets in Native American zigzag patterns.
A beautiful girl with long blond hair rises from a barstool at the island separating the living room from the kitchen. “Tyler, Cali, you remember Jaeger’s sister, Kerstin?” Mrs. Lang asks.
I don’t, but my brother does. He’s grinning like a boy with a bag of candy. Beautiful blondes, beautiful brunettes—he’s pretty equal opportunity. Beautiful being the main criterion.
Behind Kerstin, on the other side of the island, Jaeger opens a sliding door, entering the room in front of a tall, handsome older man with light, wavy brown hair peppered with white.
Deep in conversation, neither man notices us. Words like crushed granite, compaction, and interlocking pavers fly from their lips as they dust off their feet on a mat. Jaeger glances up, catches his sister standing, and scans the room. His gaze lands on me, and his mouth twitches.
He walks over to my brother and they greet each other with a manly, backslapping hug, the force of which would have knocked me over.
Introductions are made for Gen, and all of a sudden I get shy.
Which isn’t like me. But this is the first time I’ve seen Jaeger since my breakup with Eric.
The party doesn’t count, because he was so drunk I’m not even sure he remembers pulling me into the bedroom and falling asleep with me on top of him—a humiliation from which my ego shall never recover.
The group of us chats for a bit and it’s not long before Jaeger’s mom announces dinner.
She made beef stroganoff and we eat it family style around a large trestle table made of what looks like reclaimed wood planks.
The food is delicious, and Jaeger’s parents and Gen, of all people, keep the conversation going.
Gen and I have flip-flopped. Tonight she’s the talkative one, while I’m quiet. Or maybe she can tell I’m uncomfortable and she is doing her best to make up for my conversational ineptitude.
“What made you decide to move to the States?” Gen asks Mr. Lang.
He dabs the corner of his mouth with a cloth napkin.
“We own a family business that specializes in soft plastics. Two of our factories are in California. I work from home, but travel often to the factories. We liked California and decided to move here when Jaeger was a baby so that I’d have more time with the family. ”
A plastics empire. Explains the enormous home on the lake. The timetable accounts for why neither Jaeger nor his sister has an Austrian accent.
“Lake Tahoe provided an excellent training location for Jaeger when he was competing,” Mr. Lang continues. “My wife and I were very happy with our decision to move.”
The dishes are soon whisked away and Jaeger’s parents disappear downstairs, while Gen, Tyler, Jaeger, Kerstin, and I sit around the table with a bottle of expensive wine. Mrs. Lang also left a batch of apple strudel, which Tyler and Jaeger are inhaling.
With his parents gone and Jaeger sitting across from me, I can’t help glancing over. He looks up at the same time I do and smiles. I return the smile, but his brows crease together, eyes scanning my face.
He stretches his arm across the table and tugs the sleeve at my wrist. “What’s wrong?”
I plaster another smile on my face more fake than the last. I shake my head. I may be loud and outspoken, but it comes from genuine conviction. I’m no good at lying, even when my best interests are at stake.
From the moment Jaeger walked into the room with his dad, electric zingers have been shooting through every cell in my body at strategic moments.
During chance eye contact—Jaeger tugging my sleeve—it doesn’t take much.
It’s like he’s the plug and my body is the electrical receptacle.
And isn’t that a raunchy yet accurate analogy.
I don’t want this. The timing is off. I’m not ready for anything serious. And for some reason, I get the sense that a casual hookup with Jaeger would destroy me in a way the breakup with Eric didn’t come close to doing.
Jaeger continues to stare, the puzzled expression shifting to mild worry. I look down at the table, avoiding his eyes.
“Remember when you tried to grow sideburns, Tyler?” Kerstin says. “All you managed were patchy blotches.” She beams and my brother frowns.
I like this girl. Kerstin must have spent time with Jaeger and my brother in high school if she remembers Tyler’s facial hair misadventures.
“He was so determined, he let them grow to his jaw line,” Kerstin continues to Gen, “convinced that the added surface area would thicken his burns.” Kerstin snickers and I do too.
That shit was funny as hell. Tyler looked like a patchy Chewbacca for a month. The best part is, Tyler’s facial hair grows bright red. But even that didn’t deter him.
As funny as this conversation is, I can’t sit while I sense Jaeger’s knowing eyes on me. I rise and walk a few feet to the large windows overlooking the lake.
Nothing interrupts the electric vibe between us tonight—not other relationships, not alcohol.
What I’m feeling is pure and real. He’s even in tune with my conflicted emotions, and that can’t be good.
The invitation to see if something could happen between us beckons, but I can’t give in to it.
Jaeger is a temptation I’m not ready for.
“What’s wrong with her?” my brother mumbles to Gen.
Bugger, no! I swing around, but before I can send Gen the evil eye and warn her to keep her mouth shut, the new, more outgoing Gen speaks.
“Her boyfriend broke up with her,” she says under her breath, though everyone hears. I can hear and I’m a few feet away. “How do you expect her to act?”
“What?” Tyler says loudly, eyes flashing to me. “Is that true?”
Kerstin sits straighter and glances hesitantly at me. Gen has her mouth open, frozen in place, as if realizing her mistake.
I instinctively glance at Jaeger, praying he wasn’t paying attention, but he’s holding a forkful of apple strudel near his mouth and staring at the table. His gaze slowly moves to mine and his eyes darken. He sets down the fork, jaw flexing.
“Tyler,” I say quietly. “We’ll talk about it later.”
Tyler balls his hand into a fist on the table, his eyes narrowed. “I hate that dipshit.”
Excellent. Perfect time to hash this out. Thank you, Tyler. I will kill you when we get home, along with Gen.
“You’re not getting back together with him, Cali,” Tyler declares.
I let out a long-suffering sigh and look to the ceiling. “Genevieve, whatever happened to best friend confidentiality?”
Gen covers her mouth, grimacing. “I’m so sorry, Cali,” she mumbles through her fingers. She drops her hands helplessly. “I thought he knew.”
Jaeger looks off into the distance, his mouth tense.
I never told him I had a boyfriend. Why didn’t I tell him?
A million logical reasons kept me from mentioning it before, but nothing comes to mind now.
I feel like I’ve betrayed him, and that’s the last thing I want to do. I know firsthand how it feels.
Jesus. I’m no better than Eric. If Jaeger and I are friends, which we are, my relationship status should have come up. Now it’s too late.
Jaeger stands and busses the last dishes from the table. He offers more wine to everyone, his gaze barely touching me.
Tyler, Gen, and I leave shortly after the last drop of wine disappears, and I want to throw myself into the lake. Getting dumped by Eric was humiliating, sad, and enlightening in a painful, growing-up sort of way. Our relationship was shallow. I realize that now.
But tonight—the betrayal on Jaeger’s face? I’m devastated.
What have I done?