Chapter 18
“How is this happening?It doesn’t even make sense.” Lorelei paced across the guest cabin, looking out the window but not seeing anything but Slick’s handsome face in her mind, his cheeks red from exertion.
Her dad leaned against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest, and Margot sat on the edge of the bed.
“I’m so confused. Out of all the people in the world, how is Ginty’s agent Stevie’s father?”
“It’s crazy,” Margot said.
“I can’t believe it.” Memories pelted her.
Him, coming in with a Christmas tree. Stringing popcorn on fishing line. He’d made cocoa for her when it wasn’t even something he drank. He’d been so kind. So generous. “He said he left me a note.”
“You don’t believe him?” Margot asked.
She thought back to that morning. It had taken her all of fifteen minutes to decide to get the hell out of there. She’d hidden long enough. Thanks to Slick, she had a purpose, a to-do list, and the determination to attack it.
“Honey?” Margot prodded.
“It’s not like I looked for it, and I left almost everything behind.” She’d been so sick of wearing the same clothes for three months.
“And the service you hired to clean didn’t try to get in touch with you?” Margot asked.
She turned to her stepmom. “No. But the place was a mess. We’d made decorations and meals and cocoa. I don’t know that they would’ve noticed a note.”
“Do you think he’s lying about it?” her dad asked.
“I don’t know him to be a liar.” She lifted her arms and let them drop. “But then, we hung out for all of thirty-six hours. How well could I know him?”
And yet, even as she said the words, she felt resistance. She had known him. In some small way, he’d shown her his true self. She had a feeling he’d given her a gift he didn’t share with many.
“So, now what?” Margot asked.
“Now…” She turned back to the window, pressing her fingertips to the cool pane. “I have to tell him.” Tears blurred her vision. “How crazy is this? I’ve dreamed of giving Stevie a dad. But it was some guy who lived locally, who worked a nine-to-five job. It wasn’t a workaholic who lived in New York City.”
“Yeah.” Margot sounded concerned. “It’s complicated.”
“I don’t want to share her. She’s my daughter. My girl. The idea that he’ll take her from me?—”
“No one’s taking Stevie anywhere.” Her dad’s tone was firm. Implacable.
“Dad, he lives two thousand miles away. If he can prove paternity—which he can—then he has rights, too.”
“I think he has to sign an affidavit.” Margot read the screen of her phone.
Because of course, while Lorelei flipped out, her stepmom had looked up the legal process. She was so grateful for her. She was the most nurturing, kind, smart, creative woman Lorelei had ever met. “I mean, she’s his daughter. I can’t imagine him walking away. And then what? He’ll want fifty-fifty custody.” She pressed a hand over her aching heart. “What if he takes my baby away for half the year?”
Her dad pushed off the wall. “He’s not taking Stevie.”
“He could,” Lorelei said. “As her father, it’s his right.”
“First of all, we don’t know if he even wants to be a father.” Margot’s tone had steel in it, too.
She thought about what he’d just said about his schedule. I’d be a terrible husband.
He’d said the same thing in the cabin. He didn’t want kids.
Was it possible he’d walk away?
Why did that hurt just as much? She didn’t want Stevie growing up with a father who didn’t want her. What would that do to her?
“Stop.” Her dad came to her, enfolding her in his arms. “You’re making up scenarios in your head. Right now, none of them are real.”
“You’re right.” She breathed in his mountain man scent—pine and woodsmoke, a hint of spicy soap.
“Just know, we’re in this with you,” he said.
She fell against him, letting the fear wash over her because she knew her dad could take it. He’d stand with her through anything.
Margot joined them, her hand on Lorelei’s back. “We’ll take it one step at a time. There’s absolutely no point in jumping ahead to the what-ifs. It won’t get us anywhere. First, you have to tell him.”
When she’d figured out he’d left, she’d cursed him out for being a coward. Was he so afraid of their connection that he’d just snuck out the door? Then she’d wondered if something terrible had happened. Maybe he’d gotten bad news. Finally, she’d made peace with it—he’d given her so much in such a short amount of time.
“In any event, Stevie’s not even two yet,” her dad said. “No court is going to give him physical custody of a toddler who doesn’t even know him.”
She pulled away. “That’s true.” And it did make her feel better.
“So, whatever happens, it won’t be for a while,” her dad said. “If he does want to be involved, he’ll have to come here to visit.”
“That makes me feel better.” Lorelei didn’t know much about Slick, but she knew he had a strong sense of integrity. He’d do the right thing. Which meant… “What if, when she’s older, she wants to spend Christmas with him? What if he tries to buy her love with big presents?” So far, her little girl had grown up playing with wooden spoons and metal bowls, chasing dust motes in the conservatory, and sculpting bread dough. “What if he gets her a car for her sixteenth birthday? A condo when she goes to college? What if she prefers him because he spoils her?”
“All right, get it out.” Margot made a gimme motion. “All your fears and worries. Let them go.”
Yeah, let’s do that. Because they were coming fast and hard. “What if he gets married, and his wife wants to be a mother? What if they have another child?” These were all possibilities she’d considered as she’d nursed late at night or drove long distances. “They might want Stevie, you know? Who wouldn’t want her? She’s feisty and bold and fearless. He’s going to fall in love with her, and he’s going to want to spend time with her.”
“You said he’s busy,” Margot said. “He works all the time”
“Yes. Which makes it even worse. He’ll want to do the right thing and be a father, but he’ll be too busy to deal with a child, so he’ll hire a nanny, and then Stevie will be left all alone in the city. What if she misses me and is too young to understand that I didn’t send her away, that I actually want to be with her more than anyone else on the planet?” She looked between them. “No offense.”
“None taken.” Her dad gave a soft grin, but the skin around his eyes crinkled with worry.
“What else could happen?” Margot asked.
“She could love her dad more than me and choose to live in New York.”
“You’re right,” Margot said. “That is a possibility. But you know what else is? She could also love this life you’ve made for her so much that she never wants to leave. She’ll have grandparents and aunts and uncles and cousins.” She gestured out the window. “And horses and goats and chickens and?—”
“Archery and snowboarding and dirt biking,” her dad said. “And there’s another possibility. He could decide to co-parent with you and move here.”
“There are no sports agencies in Calamity, but I get what you’re saying. There are a million possibilities, and I’m filling my head with the worst ones.” She sighed. “Well, it worked, Margot. You drained me of all my fears.”
“You feel better?” Margot asked.
“Yeah. I’ll just have to take it one step at a time.”
“I know it’s hard.” Margot rubbed Lorelei’s arm. “But one thing you have to remember, if he’s a good man, he’ll want the best for his daughter.”
And he was a good man. She believed that. “Okay. I’ll go tell him.” Lorelei headed for the door, and her parents followed.
“Now?” her dad asked.
She knew he was thinking about the wedding. “It’ll be worse if I wait.” She stepped outside.
The sun hovered right at the summit, leaving enough light to make her way back to the main house. The trees cast shadows, and a horse whinnied in the distance. She hadn’t thought to put on a sweater, so she rubbed her arms against the chill.
Her phone buzzed, and she checked the screen to find a text from Noa.
Noa: We’ve chosen the perfect venue for the ceremony!! Come to the barn.
She showed it to her dad and stepmom. “Of all the beautiful places on this property, they chose the barn? I haven’t even thought about renovating that dusty, stinky place.”
“It’s a great choice,” Margot said. “And we won’t have to do much. Let’s get a crew in there tomorrow to clean it out, and then we’ll transform it into something magical.”
“You think?” Lorelei couldn’t imagine it.
“Oh, absolutely. It’s too late to hire a wedding planner, but I can help you pull something together.”
“You sure you want to take that on?” Lorelei asked.
“I missed out on all the planning of my daughter’s wedding, so you bet I want to do it.” Margot grinned. “My mind’s already starting to come up with ideas. It’ll be beautiful.”
“All right then. Let’s do this.”
“When’s the ceremony?” Margot asked.
“I was supposed to talk to Booker tonight about a schedule of events, but I think that conversation might have to wait for another day.”
“It’s all right. We’ll get started right away. The question is, do you want to rent tables and chairs and a dance floor, or do you want to buy it all?”
“Whichever can get here the soonest.”
“Makes sense.” Margot squeezed her hand. “We’ve got this.”
As they approached the barn, her dad put his arm around her. “Don’t think for one second that he’s got all the power.”
“That’s an amazing thing to say, Dad.” She gave him a big smile. “I didn’t realize it, but that’s exactly what I was doing. That’s why I’m so afraid. But you’re absolutely right.” She turned into his arms, needing a hug before the confrontation with Booker.
Margot joined them, and the three held each other tightly. With the air scented with dust, pine, and the ghosts of animals once frolicking in the corral and bedding down in the barn, she savored this moment. The last one before her life changed permanently.
Could be for the better, could be for the worse. She wouldn’t know until she saw the look in his eyes.
Because even though he tried to be all stony-faced, she could read him.
As they reached the entrance, a crew of ranch hands hauled out bales of hay. “Really? A barn?” She said quietly, for her parents’ ears only.
“Did you have somewhere else in mind?” Margot asked.
“If I were getting married here, I’d do it outside.” She gazed up at the darkening sky. “An hour earlier, when the sky’s purple and orange.”
Her dad cupped her elbow. “You ready?”
“Yeah. I am.” With her stepmom on one side and her dad on the other, Lorelei drew in a breath and headed into the barn.
Right away, her gaze landed on Booker. He stood out with his height, his muscular physique, and that commanding air and presence that had made her feel so protected, so safe, in the cabin. He was talking to Ginty and Noa, gesturing around as if describing his vision.
“Oh, look,” Margot said. “Walker and Colt are here.”
Her five-year-old nephew pulled a rusty red wagon with Stevie happily seated in it. She was laughing as the boy picked up his pace. Her little thrill-seeker daughter had no sense of danger. And while the pediatrician had encouraged Lorelei to let her have experiences so she learned boundaries and limitations, it was easier said than done.
But just as she started toward the bride, groom, and her baby daddy—my God, how can this be possible?—her daughter gripped the edges of the wagon and started to stand. Colt was jogging now, turning back to laugh with his cousin, and didn’t see the bridle lying on the ground.
“Stevie.” On the move, she shouted, “Sit down.”
Everyone in the barn turned at the sound of her voice, except her daughter who was having so much fun she didn’t hear. Lorelei made a run for it, but she had to watch helplessly as the wheels hit the bridle. The wagon rocked, causing Stevie’s neck to jerk back. Her little girl tried to hold her balance, but her laughter turned to terror when she realized she couldn’t.
Ginty, her dad, Margot…they were all racing over, but it was clear no one was going to get there in time. And then, seconds before Stevie hit the dirt, Booker threw himself on the ground, arms outstretched, and caught her in his hand like a baseball in a mitt.
The barn went silent for one second before Stevie’s mouth opened wide, and she let out a shriek. Tears streamed down her rosy cheeks, and she held her arms out for her mom.
Lorelei grabbed her and held her close, one hand on top of her head. “You’re okay, sweetheart. Mr. Hayes caught you. You’re okay.” She was saying it more to reassure herself, but she was so damn grateful her daughter hadn’t hit the floor.
“You all right, baby doll?” her dad asked.
Stevie looked to her mom for confirmation.
“Does anything hurt?” Lorelei pushed her daughter’s hair off her face, but it was clear she’d only been shaken by the fall. As she soothed her little girl, she saw Colt with shame-stained cheeks and his dad kneeling, talking to him.
“Can you believe that save?” Ginty laughed, patting Booker’s shoulder. “He was a first-round draft pick at eighteen, and he’s still got it.”
Her baby daddy wiped the dust off his jeans, his eyes on the little girl. While everyone chatted excitedly about what happened, his gaze narrowed.
Her pulse accelerated. Perspiration broke out on her hairline.
Because he was figuring it out. He looked from Stevie to Lorelei and back again, clearly processing. Finally, his gaze settled on Lorelei, the hardness of it giving her a jolt.
Instinctively, she tightened her hold on her daughter.
He started toward her. So intense. God, she remembered that intensity. In the cabin, it had thrilled her. Now, it rattled her bones.
It was all going to come out. Here and now.
He stood before her. “How old is she?”