18. STERLING
I”ve spent the entire day cleaning. I know. What an exciting way to spend a Saturday.
This time last week, Peter and I were out on the lake. After what seemed like a never-ending chat, we finally did some fishing, and it was a successful outing.
We were baited for catfish and Peter caught a whopper, over twelve pounds. I got one a little under four. It was much easier to catch something when we weren’t jabbering nonstop. We came back to my place to fry them up. It was a relaxing afternoon on the deck, just like old times.
Thankfully, we only talked sports for the rest of the day. No more inquisitions.
But as I take note of my current situation, blue rubber gloves on my hands, holding onto a toilet scrubber, it strikes me that today isn’t quite as enjoyable.
I keep a pretty clean house in general, but deep cleaning is not really my thing, unless I’ve got something on my mind. Then my Mr. Clean mode kicks into overdrive so I don’t have to think about whatever’s got me weighed down.
Four hours in, I’ve found tons of things that have gone missing in my house. I’m up to eight random single socks found in various locations, in the old standby behind the dryer, but also in all sorts of other places.
There was one under the stove and a few others in the couch cushions. A couple more fell between my nightstand and the bed, but the most unusual was the lone survivor lurking in the pantry, where it had inexplicably joined forces with the canned goods.
Why I took off one sock while searching for a snack I’ll never know. It begs the question, what kind of day could I have been having?
There have also been some good finds, like the extra set of car keys that have been lost for months. For unknown reasons, they were in a measuring cup.
And finally, I found the living room remote control in a shoe in my closet. I’ve been watching TV in my bedroom for weeks. Given my obvious absentmindedness, I’m not sure how I run a successful clinic.
Oh well. We’ll take the treasure hunt finds as a win. I need one. I finally heard from Emma this morning, but her text was all business. She ignored my comment about the other night and just went right into the progress she’s made with the project.
Don’t get me wrong. It was all good news. She already hired a band for the concert and Zoe found a great location for the silent auction. The raffle in the town square next weekend is a go. We moved it ahead of the concert.
Seems like Emma put all of her focus on the project over the last few days, which is great, but we’re supposed to be doing this together.
She said she and the girls are going to gather donated items for the raffle next week, so I didn’t need to worry about it. So much for spending lots of time together on the project.
I wasn’t exactly sure how to respond, but I didn’t want to make things any more awkward, so I thanked her for her efforts and didn’t mention anything personal.
But I’ve been thinking about her all day. And when I’m not thinking about her, I’m thinking about Peter and our dinner tonight. Man, that family is dominating my head space.
Everything is really coming together for the shelter project, though, so I should be happy and I am. On cue, Buddy ambles over. He isn’t so sure about the cleaning stuff I’ve been toting around so he’s been keeping his distance.
But now that I’m taking a break on the couch, he’s instantly by my side. It’s great to see him fully healed at this point. He loves the lake. We spend every morning by the water and he frolics up and down the shoreline.
“You like it here boy, don’t ya?”
Buddy’s tail starts thumping at the sound of his name, then he sprints off to find his ball. Emma was right. I have enjoyed having him here.
There it is again, invasion of my head space. I can’t stop it no matter what I do.
Fold some laundry, think of Emma and how good she smells.
Drink a cup of coffee, think of Emma and when we are at ”Perk Pour.”
Make some lunch, think of Emma and takeout. You get the picture.
And now it’s time to get ready for dinner with Peter. Yippee.
No, it’s going to be fine. He’s my best friend and we’re just gonna have a nice dinner together. Maybe he didn’t even see the kiss and I’m being paranoid.
Let’s go with that because my dishpan hands are begging me to put an end to all the housework for the day.
***
Peter and Linda live just a few blocks from my clinic in town, which is why he was out walking near it the other night. I’m not sure why I never thought about that while Emma and I were having our moment.
Scratch that. I know exactly why I never thought of it. Peter’s face isn’t what came to mind when I was up against that wall. I’ll keep those thoughts to myself.
I park my car in his driveway and head down the path to the front porch. Peter owns a landscaping business, so the front of his house is straight out of a magazine.
Of course, with this being North Carolina, Magnolia trees, with their fragrant scent, stand majestically on either side of the home. The grass looks like a lush green carpet. Perfectly trimmed hedges flank the meandering pathway of stamped concrete.
There are flowerbeds of varying sizes, boasting a mix of perennials and annuals of all colors in perfect coordination, along with a tasteful water feature that tops off the oasis.
It”s impressive. Maybe I should just hang out here; it’s very peaceful.
But no, I’ve got to do this.
I take the stairs up the porch slowly, like I’m headed for a root canal appointment. Before I have a chance to waver at the door, it springs open and Linda envelops me in a hug.
“Hi, Sterling! So glad you could come. We’ve missed you around here lately. Everything was so crazy getting ready for the wedding.”
I give her a friendly squeeze. I’m not a big hugger, but Linda is really a great person. Peter found a good one, so it’s the least I can do.
“I really appreciate the invite. And enchiladas? You really know the way to my heart.” I flash her a smile.
“Well, they are not my specialty, but Peter says they’re your favorite, so here’s hoping they’re good.”
We head inside. “I’m sure they’ll be great. And if not, it’s the thought that counts.” She lets out a small laugh.
I find Peter out back setting the table under the pergola. “Hey, Peter!” I say in my most chipper “I am not at all nervous about tonight” voice.
“Hey, bud. How’s it going?”
“Great.” I am really on a lying streak with him.
I help him put the finishing touches on the table, then go in to see if I can help Linda at all. Am I avoiding being alone with Peter as much as possible? Uh, yeah, obviously.
We sit down to eat a few minutes later and the meal is amazing. It’s been years since I had good enchiladas. One thing we don’t have in town is a Mexican food restaurant, and I don’t really cook, so there’s little opportunity to eat them.
The meal conversation is pleasant. I ask Linda about the honeymoon, and she has lots of details to share. Interesting how the responses you get from men and a women to the same question are so different.
Peter clearly couldn’t think of anything beyond… well, you know.
We all tag team the cleanup and it goes quickly. Yeah, more bro time. Anybody have a toilet that needs a good cleaning?
Peter and I make our way to the front porch and sit in the rocking chairs. He has a great view of the downtown from here. You can see the square if you squint.
It’s such a charming area. All the shops have flower boxes on their windows and there are ferns hanging from every streetlight. Cedar Creek has taken great care of the sidewalks, and the businesses have frontier style storefronts like in the old west.
They’re simple rectangular shapes with flat facades, most with wooden awnings. Walking around downtown really transports you back in time. But the best part is the creek that runs right through the park.
Sometimes I take a lunch break there on one the benches and there’s kids always playing in the water or feeding the ducks. It’s relaxing. I’m so glad I came back home.
Peter is quick to start up the conversation, as always. “I’m sure you know why I invited you over tonight.”
“Yep, the enchiladas. Thanks for that.”
“Not quite. The kiss, Sterling. You kissed my sister.”
“Yes, okay, there’s also that, I guess.” Technically, she was the first one to do it with the thank you kiss. Then this time she dangled the keys, what was a man supposed to do?
We sit in silence for what seems like hours. I hope he’s not expecting me to take the lead here, because that’s not going to happen.
“And?” Peter finally prompts.
“And what? I’m not sure what you want me to say.”
He leans back in his chair, taking some time before he talks again.
“We’ve talked about this Sterling.”
I jumped in suddenly. “Yeah, like twenty years ago.”
He chuckles. “You’ve got me there. But I still feel the same way I did back then. You being involved with Emma is not a good idea, even less of a good idea than it was in high school.”
“What does that mean?” I’m a little annoyed by his comment.
“Come on Sterling, I think you know.”
“No, I don’t. Enlighten me.” The blood is suddenly pumping through my body at the direction this conversation has taken. My head is the first to notice, and I press him despite my discomfort because I need to know what he’s talking about.
“Celia.”
“What does Celia have to do with Emma?”
He shifts in his chair, then leans forward, looking me directly in the eyes. “She has everything to do with Emma. You were destroyed after that relationship ended. You’ve never been the same. You completely shut down. You haven’t dated anyone since.”
“So?”
“So, I don’t want Emma to be the first person you decide to jump back into a relationship with. That type of baggage is hard to get over.”
I shake my head. I can’t believe this. I stand and pace the porch for a few minutes. There are some things I want to say, but I’ll do much better expressing them if I take some time first. I’ve got one shot at this. What I say next is too important to mess up.
When I’m as ready as I’m going to get, I take my seat again, pulling my rocking chair directly in front of his. “If it’s okay with you, I’d like to talk now and not have you say anything until I’m completely finished, all right?”
Peter nods his head in agreement.
“You’re right. Celia did break me. And yes, I didn’t think I’d ever want to date anyone again. Not that Emma and I are dating just yet, by the way. It was one kiss.”
Well two actually, but I”m not going to go there right now. ”Plus, she’s kind of been avoiding me since.”
I see Peter gulp. Yep, he definitely said something to her.
“Emma wasn’t just a silly high school crush. There has always been more to our relationship than you knew.”
Peter opens his mouth to chime in, then closes it to let me continue.
“I don’t mean that we were ever more than friends. But we spent a lot of time together when you weren’t around, confided in each other, really connected. That connection has never gone away. As soon as we saw each other again it was there. I know you want to ask. It was mostly when you were at baseball practice.”
He seems satisfied with my explanation.
“I can understand you being nervous about Emma and me getting into a relationship. I don’t even know for sure that she wants one right now. But if she does, I would like your blessing. I will do everything in my power to make her happy. She makes me want to open up again, to take a chance. There’s no one I’d rather do that with than her.”
I’m on a roll now.
“You know I’m not a mushy guy, so let me just end with this. Your sister is special, and you know it, but so do I. I’ve always known it. There are things I still need to work on, but I’m willing to do anything I need to for her. We are good for each other, but I don’t want to ruin my friendship with you either.”
Peter stands, and I stand with him. He claps his hands on my shoulders. “Ok, that’s enough. I don’t need you making me all teary-eyed. I get it. I can see you’re different now by the way you talk about her. If she really means that much to you, you have my blessing.”
I feel all the tension release in my body. “Whew. Thanks, man. That blessing may be all for nothing, though. I think the kiss spooked her. She’s kind of been ghosting me the last few days.”
Peter tsks. “Hmm, well that might have been partly my fault. I told her about Celia.”
Tension snaps back into my body like a soldier saluting his captain.
Peter sees my obvious frustration. “I’m sorry. I was worried. Just talk to her about it. Don’t give up on her.”
“You’re right. I won’t. Thanks for tonight.” Peter gives me a slap on the back as we head back inside.
I’m not sure exactly what I’ll say to Emma, but now that I have Peter’s approval, I can’t let anything stop me from proving to her how much she means to me.