Chapter 19
Nineteen
When I’d told Alfie I didn’t want to think this weekend, I hadn't anticipated being back at the club, tied to a table while my fiance explained the benefits of using hemp rope.
I wasn’t listening. I was transfixed, watching his mouth move. I was hyper aware that I was naked, in a houseful of strangers. The door was locked, the room was sound proof, but I knew they were out there.
I wished he’d take off his shirt. His jacket and tie lay neatly folded over the back of an highbacked armchair. His cuff links sat on the dresser. His shirt sleeves were rolled over. A person's forearms shouldn’t be this tantalising.
This room was designed for sex. I couldn’t tell at first. But now, everywhere I looked, I could see a loop or carabiner to hang someone from, drawers that contained who knew what, bottles filled with oil and lotion.
The light was dimmed, shadows from candle light flickered on the deep green wallpaper.
There was a four poster bed behind me, a green leather couch by the drape-framed windows.
He’d chosen the table for me. I’d stood, frozen on the spot as he undressed me, explaining carefully what each of the items on the table were for and how he was going to use them on me. He wanted me to know, he needed me to trust, he needed me to consent.
I didn’t fight as he stripped me of the pink gown he’d bought for me to wear tonight. It now hung from a hanger on the hat stand like a shedded skin.
I knelt on the table, knees right at the edge, hands folded together.
There was a metal hoop at the edge of the table and my hands were tied securely to it.
Simple knots were tied around my knees too, forcing me to remain in a kneeling position.
I couldn’t get down, couldn’t move. I was trapped, sitting on a Sybian that any moment would start vibrating between my legs.
It was terrifying and exhilarating. Putting my entire trust in a man who had broken it so many times before.
The items were laid out next to me, waiting their turn. He picked up the clamps first. One of the many tools he was going to use on me. The rope, the Sybian, the plug still inside me. I wondered when it was going to be too much.
“Remember this isn’t a punishment. I want to find out how well you can control yourself, how well you can stay focused on me, no matter what else you’re feeling.”
My nipples were already hard but he gave them a pinch anyway. I held my breath.
“Lola, breathe. Don’t close your eyes. Watch what I'm doing to you, engage with it.”
I released my breath and watched as he attached the clamps. I whimpered, they hurt more than the cufflinks. They had very small hoops attached, looking almost as if I’d had my nipples pierced.
“These were the gentlest ones I could find.”
“They still hurt.”
He lifted my chin, studying my face. “Not too much. You can handle it.” It was a statement, not a question.
He picked up the rope next. It was very thin, almost like thread, but stronger. I gulped, I knew what was coming next and my core clenched in anticipation. He threaded the rope through the hoops and pulled it through the metal loop my hands were tied to.
I watched him, my beautiful man, he was enjoying every fucking moment of this. I was lost in his ocean but I didn’t feel like I was drowning. Not even when he reached for the little bell.
He crouched and out of my sight I felt him tying the rope to the brass bell. Gently, he let it go and I gasped as it tugged on my nipples. The pain was exquisite. He stood, his hand slipping into my hair.
He kissed me, swallowing my pain, my panic. He kissed me until I was centred again.
“I will never betray you again. Not ever.”
“Mmm,” I murmured, feeling almost dreamy.
“Repeat it, Lo.”
“You’ll never betray me again.”
“Good. Relax now.”
“Take off your shirt. I need your skin…” He did as I asked and held me close. So intimate, so gentle.
“I feel dreamy.”
“That’s good.” He kissed me again. “Now straighten up.” He pressed my shoulders back until my spine was straight, the bell jingling as I moved. Then he reached the remote that would operate the Sybian I sat upon.
“I’m going to make you come now. You hold that posture, if that bell jingles…”
“I know.” He’d already explained to me what would happen if the bell made any noise.
“What do you know?”
“You’ll help me stay still.”
“How will I do that?”
“You’ll put that thing inside me and tie it to my hair.” I didn’t want to look at it. The hook shaped item next to me with a small ball on one end, or the length of rope that lay beside it, waiting to be wound into my hair just like he’d done to me in the glass house.
“What is it?”
I gulped. “A hook.” I left out the other word that would describe exactly which part of my anatomy it was for. The plug was already enough. That thing scared me. This was unchartered territory for us.
Alfie grinned. “It makes me so fucking hard when you blush.”
“Alfie, I want you, not a machine.”
“You’ll have me. For life. I won't be done with you till dawn. Till death, even. That’s a long ride, Lo.
Enjoy it.” He pulled up a chair and sat, remote in hand.
I’d seen this machine in action before, the first night I’d come to the club.
Only I’d been the one operating it on Kals’ rope bunny.
I’d watched that woman come apart on this machine.
The vibrations started and my eyes fluttered closed.
“No, don’t close your eyes. Watch me. Look at me.
Don’t look at anything but me. Don’t think about anything but me.
Nothing exists for you but me.” His words echoed across my memories, reminding me of a time where all I could think about was him.
That’s what he wanted to do to me now. Fill my mind and body with nothing but him and teach me that he would bring me back to the world, that he wouldn’t try to consume me whole this time.
He unzipped his trousers, pulling his length free. My mouth watered. I wanted it. I wanted his touch so desperately I felt starved. He began to touch himself, driving the vibrations up a notch. I gasped.
“That’s it. You’re sitting so well, Lola. That bell hasn’t moved at all.”
“I want—”
“You want what I want. You’re exactly where I want you. I want to watch you fall apart.” He pressed the remote again and this time I cried out. Almost throwing myself back but remembering just in time I was attached to that bell. I did not want that hook thing inside me.
I gripped the edge of the table and focused on breathing shallow breaths that barely moved my chest. My nipples pulled in the sweetest agony.
I watched him. The candlelight flickering over his chest. His hand moving over his erection, it was thick, I knew how soft the skin was.
The veins in his forearm, the lines of muscle.
The tick in his jaw and that heat in his eyes. This was a man who would kill for me.
“That’s it. You’re right on that edge aren’t you?”
I nodded, trying so desperately hard to stay still.
“Fall, baby. Let me watch you fall.”
As I hit my peak, my back arched, only a little but it was enough. The fucking bell jingled. I froze, panting my orgasm away.
Alfie smirked. “Oh, Lola. I was so hoping you would do that.” A shiver ran over my skin. He stood, putting himself away and fastening his trousers, though they barely contained his erection. He came to me and kissed me down from my high. “Tell me you trust me.”
“I trust you. I don’t know if I’m ready for…that.”
“Don’t tell me what you’re not ready for. Trust me to read you.”
He circled the table, my entire body tensed as he took his place behind me.
I could do nothing but wait as he bound the rope into my hair, braiding it along the way.
He picked up the hook shaped like a backwards ‘S’ with a ball on one end.
I gasped as he worked the plug in and out of me a few times before removing it entirely and setting it aside.
I twitched as I felt the cold steel press between my thighs.
He moved it over my core, coating it in my juices.
It slid backwards and he began to apply pressure. Oh fuck.
“Whether you resist it or accept it, it’s still going in. Do you want to accept it? There’s a whole new world of sensations waiting for you and I can’t wait to give them to you. Do you want to experience it with me?”
I closed my eyes. My stomach was a knot. I was afraid of the unknown but excited too. And I trusted him. I trusted he would take care of me. “Yes.”
He kissed my neck. “Then let your body open. Push down.” I did and gasped as it slipped inside.
He held me still as I struggled, moving away from the new sensation.
“It’s alright. You took that so well, I’m proud of you.
” He took my hair, hooking the end into the braid, securing my head so I could barely move.
“You look so fucking pretty. The way your back curves, your breasts pouting at me.” He spanked me, snapping me back into the moment. “How does that feel?”
“It hurts.”
“That’s not what I asked you. Tell me how it makes you feel.”
I tried to think. It was hard. Hard to form a sentence. “I like it.”
“Tell me how it makes you feel,” he asked again.
“Owned.”
“Good girl.”
He hit me again and again. I groaned, getting lost in the pleasure.
My legs hurt but I didn’t care. He turned the Sybian on, setting it to a low hum.
I hissed as he spanked me again, my skin starting to burn.
He rubbed a hand over the singing skin and came around the table again, grey eyes studying my face.
“Safeword?”
“Harrington.”
“Good.” He caught me off guard by climbing up on the table, positioning one foot on either side of me. I gazed up at him as he unfastened his trousers. Shirtless in the dim light he looked like an angel. My mouth watered as he released himself again.
“Really? You’re letting me?” Was I finally going to be allowed to pleasure him back?
“I told you I was working up to it. I told you I needed to do it my way.” He needed complete control.
“Open.” His jaw ticked as he entered my mouth.
He moved himself over my tongue, I stayed still, letting him set the pace.
Both of us were taking new steps tonight.
He was showing me he believed he was worthy of my worship now.
With his free hand, he turned the vibrations up, making me moan. I still didn’t move. I was determined to keep that bell quiet.
“Relax, breathe around me.” He pushed back, further into my throat until I gagged. My mouth filled with saliva and he groaned, enjoying the slow fucking of my mouth.
He stared down at me, holding my gaze. He wasn’t trying to get off, I realised.
He was relishing every second and sensation.
I wished I could touch him. The Sybian turned up again and as his grip tightened on my hair, he knew I was getting close.
He held himself deep in my throat as I came.
I cried around him, I couldn’t move. The ball was so heavy inside me, my nipples ached intensely.
It was incredible. He still wasn’t done with me.
He climbed down, without reaching his own pleasure. He unfastened the ropes binding my hands and legs and removed the hook from my hair. The bell disappeared, he freed my nipples, kissing each of the sore tips. The ball he left inside me.
I groaned as he let me stretch out on the table. He massaged my legs, breathing life back into the muscles. Then the binding started again. He turned the hook so it rested on my mound, the ball still inside.
“Don’t let that out. You keep it in there while I tie you.”
He tied my hands above me, fixing me to the table.
He looped rope around my legs, pulling them back until I was spread wide, the knots fastened over my head.
Fresh rope was bound around my body, tying my breasts in a figure eight, forcing them to swell.
My eyes rolled back. It felt incredible.
My bottom rested just over the edge of the table, giving him complete access to me.
He knelt, latching his mouth onto me, moving the ball in and out of my opening.
I hissed as it stretched me open. Every time I tensed, he stopped, taking the pleasure away.
I opened up, it felt incredible, pressing against my g-spot.
Eventually, he removed it entirely and threw it away, letting it clatter on the floor.
He leaned over me and in one smooth motion, he filled my core, my aching flesh welcoming him in.
The only part of me he had neglected so far.
He kissed me, making love to my mouth, to my body.
Then he pressed himself to my back entrance. I tensed.
“Safeword.”
“Harrington.”
“Good girl.” He applied more pressure. “Push. Let me in.”
I cried out as I stretched. “Alfie—”
“It’s alright.” He leaned over me, cupping my face, stroking my hair. “I have you and I won’t hurt you. You can stop me any time.” The safeword. I had the safeword if I wanted it to stop. But I didn’t. I was overwhelmed but I didn’t want it to stop.
He pulled back, nursing my entrance with the head of his cock, opening me up.
It felt so strange, so alien. I couldn’t tell if I liked it.
But he did. Fuck, he loved it. His eyes were hooded, lost in lust. I trusted him.
He pressed in again and this time he didn’t have to tell me to push back.
As I did my body just opened up and he began to slide in. I couldn’t help it. I panicked.
“Shhh. Don’t fight me.” He pulled back when it hurt, inching his way in again until finally he was fully seated. He stood, held the rope binding my breasts and began to move.
All the way out and all the way in, punishingly slow. I thought I might cry. Everything ached, every part of me cried out for release and relief. All I could do was watch him, connect with him deeply and watch him fuck me. He was hypnotic, his touch, his gaze.
I cursed him when he slipped fingers inside me, working my core until I gushed over him. I’d never done that with him inside me before and it made my teeth clench. He fucked me through it as I sprayed, never letting me go. I shook, trembled, I swore at him. And he loved me, he held me.
Finally, he came, filling me in a way that felt so alien. He kissed me. He cleaned me and then he started again.
He hadn’t lied when he’d said he wouldn’t be done with me until dawn.