Chapter 36 #2
I’d taken the medication and accepted the paper underwear with the giant sanitary pad in it. I felt wrong, deeply wrong inside. My body hurt everywhere but inside I was numb.
A plump woman with gold-rimmed glasses and a pixie cut came by offering us tea and biscuits. We accepted both but touched neither.
“You should go and get some sleep,” I told Alfie through the pain and nausea.
“As if I could sleep while you’re here.”
Over the next few hours, my dignity disappeared.
When I bled so much they had to change the sheets, Alfie carried me to the bathroom to clean me up.
He lowered me onto the toilet and despite the nurse offering to do it, he pulled off the underwear and pad himself.
He folded it quickly so I couldn’t see and put it in the disposal.
When it hurt to wipe myself he did it for me, somehow more gently than I could have done it.
I cried, leaning on his shoulder, sitting on a toilet in a hospital gown.
He didn’t tell me I was alright, or that everything was going to be okay.
He just knelt on the floor in his expensive suit and held me until I could breathe again.
With him holding me up, I made it back to bed. I lay there, in too much pain to talk. I cried, I slept, I tried to drink something only to throw it up again and cry more from the pain in my ribs.
It was early hours of the morning now. The ward was quiet but there was noise outside. The rush of A&E on a Friday night. I felt like we were hiding in a castle while a war waged outside. A war we had no part of.
There were no windows and I couldn’t see the time, but I knew when day came. The cramps had eased a little but the throbbing in my head and chest were worse.
Alfie asked me if I was hungry for the hundredth time. He wanted to fix everything but he couldn’t.
“I need you to tell me what will help.”
“I just want my mum,” I said and then fresh tears came.
“I can get Keira. Or Natalie. I’ll bring them.”
“No, please. I don’t want to see anyone right now. Can we leave? I just want to go.”
“Not until the doctor says so.”
I wanted to argue but I knew there was no point. “Are there any updates on Maia yet? Or have the police said anything?”
“You shouldn’t be worrying about that right now.”
“It’ll take my mind off it. Please.”
“They’ve arrested a couple of people but the family is well connected enough that it will probably come to nothing. The police will want a statement from you when you’re feeling better, for now I’ve told them to stay away. Elliot has already reached out to arrange paying off your fathers debt.”
“Maia?”
“Out of surgery. Not out of the woods.”
I waited for him to elaborate but he didn’t. “I want to see her.”
“Not today.”
“Please…”
“No. I forbid it. You’re staying in that bed until they discharge you and then I’m taking you home. You will rest and you will fucking relax and stop worrying about everyone else when you were nearly fucking killed. Do you understand?”
We stared at each other, each of us waiting for the other to attack again.
I didn’t have it in me and he was already sorry for snapping at me.
He was grieving too. It was his baby too.
I stroked his cheek and he kissed my palm.
Finally he laid his head down in my lap and after a while, I felt him drift off to sleep.
It was late afternoon before they finally agreed to discharge me. Alfie made getting me ready his project while they got the paperwork together.
My phone was in a plastic bag along with my purse, both rescued from the crash site.
I hadn’t switched it on yet. I wasn’t ready for the onslaught of concern from friends, family, or to face what was likely all over the news.
A shoot out resulting in the deaths of multiple people didn’t just happen in small towns in England.
I was sipping a cup of tea under Alfie’s close supervision when I recognised a familiar voice coming down the hall.
“Why is Ada here?”
“I asked her to come and bring some of your things with you. I thought she might know better what you need…what women's things you need. Also, I wanted Elliot here.” He raised a hand before I could say anything. “I know you didn’t want visitors but we still need protection and you need care, I assumed you’d prefer them over strangers. ” Once again, he was right.
When they came around the curtain even Elliot, stoic Elliot who had seen more violence than I would ever know, couldn’t hide his shock when he saw my face.
Ada was unusually quiet as she handed over a bag with a change of clothes. Twenty minutes later, I was dressed and my teeth were brushed. I did my best to make myself presentable though I didn’t dare look in a mirror yet. I didn’t need my reflection to tell me how awful I looked.
I kept my eyes glued to the floor as they led me out in a wheelchair. The setting sun greeted me as we stepped outside. While we waited for Elliot to bring the car around, I breathed in the fresh air. I felt like I’d aged a lifetime in the last twenty four hours.
The slam of a car door snapped me out of my thoughts. I opened my eyes to see my father storming across the road. His car was still running, he hadn’t bothered to park it.
“Didn’t think to call me yourself, you smug bastard?” His fierce gaze was fixed on Alfie. For the first time, I saw the man that had been sent to prison for almost beating someone to death. I saw the dangerous criminal he’d been.
“Why did I have to hear this from her sister? My daughter is in the hospital and you don’t think to tell me?”
“Why would I tell you when it’s your fault she’s here?” Alfie snapped. He stepped up to my father, chest to chest. I looked around, panicking as there was no Elliot here to diffuse the situation. “Who do you think did this to her?”
That stopped my father cold in his tracks.
“Your friends did this because you owe them money.”
John shook his head, his mouth opening and closing like a fish. “Lola, I didn’t—”
“We’ll see you at Natalie’s wedding and I’ll pay off your debt for you, after that you stay the fuck away from her.”
“That’s not why I’m—”
Elliot arrived then in another black Sedan.
He jumped out of the car, stepping between Alfie and my father before it could escalate into violence.
“You should leave. Now. The only reason you aren’t getting your head kicked in is because I don’t want the bruises to ruin your other daughter's wedding photos.”
John looked at me one last time. “I’m so sorry.”
“Go!” Alfie yelled, cutting off any further excuses. I couldn’t look at him, couldn’t talk, couldn’t fight. For once, I was happy to let Alfie handle my problems for me. My father walked away. I watched his car disappear, hot tears pouring down my cheeks.
“Take me home, please.”
Alfie took my hand as Ada wheeled me to the car. “We’ll be there in a few hours.”
“No,” I told him. “Not to London. Take me back to Harrington.”
It was the only place that felt like home right now.