Chapter 17
RAFE
I feel like a creepy stalker as I watch Juniper strut her stuff in her itsy-bitsy, teeny bikini up and down the beach.
She looks amazing with her long, dark hair hanging down her back and her curvy figure.
There are other women who are strutting their stuff like peacocks to be admired by every male in the vicinity, but I don’t notice any of them. I only notice her. I know she’s seen me as well because she gave me a small little wave, almost teasing, taunting in its simplicity, in its casualness.
I want to stride over and interrupt the shoot.
I want to pull her into my arms. I want to scream to the world that she’s mine.
And yet I don’t. I want to but I know that I can’t..
Because she’s not mine. Juniper Meadows has gotten under my skin in a way I never thought was possible.
Just years ago she was a pretty butterfly that I never paid that much attention to, but in the last few months, I began to notice her more and more.
Began to need to know her better. Began to want something more. Something deeper. Something real.
Ever since Mia and Luke started to proclaim they were in a relationship, I’ve felt some sort of pull, some magnetism toward Juniper.
Maybe it is because she is always friendly, always has a smile on her face.
Maybe it is because she is such a good friend to Mia.
The way that she treats customers, the way that she carries herself.
And even when we bicker back and forth, I still feel something.
I can still clearly remember that night years ago on her eighteenth birthday.
The way she blew the candles out and made a wish, and then her eyes sought mine.
I sauntered over to her because I was attracted to her like a moth to a flame.
And even though I knew I should give her space and distance, I couldn’t.
She looked at me and just smiled. I asked her what she’d wished for her birthday, and she told me she couldn’t tell me or it wouldn’t come true.
I placed a tendril of her hair behind her ear and brushed an invisible speck of dust off her shoulder.
She looked up at me with wide, innocent, beautiful brown eyes.
So haunting.
So familiar.
So full of tenderness.
And I asked her if she wanted to dance.
She looked surprised because I wasn’t much of a dancer, but it was her birthday, and I wanted to make her happy.
Something inside of me just wanted to give her a moment.
And so I grabbed her hand, and we danced under the moonlight.
It felt like forever, but it couldn’t have been more than a couple of minutes.
Frank Sinatra’s throaty voice carried through the night sky, and I held her to me, and she held onto me.
And we glided across the sand like we were two ballet dancers at the height of our careers.
And then I thought I’d seen a shooting star. We both looked up.
And then the kiss happened. So magical. So sweet.
So tender. Her lips felt like cotton candy.
They were so juicy and sweet, and I wanted to ravish her.
But I could tell from the expression on her face that the kiss had meant something to her.
It had been meaningful. The way she looked at me had made my heart race. And for a few moments, I was excited.
But then I saw Mia in the distance, looking for her, and I was reminded that Juniper was Mia’s best friend. That Juniper had just turned eighteen. That she was innocent. That she believed in things like soulmates and serendipity and true love. And I was just me.
I wasn’t the worst guy in the world. I knew that.
But I wasn’t looking to settle down, and I wasn’t looking to be her first or her knight in shining armor.
And I knew that if it wasn’t going to be a certain thing, I could not act upon it because she was Mia’s best friend.
She was almost like a sister. And there was no way I was going to ever play any sort of role in ruining that friendship.
And as the years went on, I tried to forget about that night. I tried to forget about the way she had tasted, the way she had looked, but she just blossomed and blossomed into this beautiful young woman. And now she is fully grown, and I am finding it harder and harder to resist her.
I don’t want to resist her. I am not scared of where it may lead.
I am not scared that I won’t be enough. I am scared that she no longer wants me in that way.
Sure, we have a physical connection that is undeniable, but I don’t know if she will ever be able to open herself up to me, to look at me so innocently and vulnerably as she did on that night.
I look down at my phone and realize I have to get back to the office.
I shouldn’t have even come out to the beach.
I don’t know why I stumbled down here.
Maybe just to catch a glimpse of her.
Maybe to convince her to leave.
I head back toward the veterinary office, and I wonder what my next move should be.
I have no one I’m willing to ask.
No one I’m willing to trust with the complexity of this relationship.
As I make my way down the street, I see Rosie and Sage standing at the corner, eating ice cream, and I notice that they notice me, so I head over to them.
“Hi,” I say. “Enjoying your afternoon?”
“We are now. This ice cream’s delicious,” Sage says, licking what appears to be mint chocolate chip in a cone. “You’re so lucky that you get to live here and enjoy going to the beach and eating ice cream every day.”
Sage’s eyes widen.
“Yeah, I guess I am. Though I don’t eat ice cream every day,” I admit, laughing.
“If I lived here, I would totally eat this ice cream every day,” Rosie says.
“So, how’s your day been?”
Sage looks down the road and tilts her head to the side. “Did you happen to go down to the beach?”
“I was just taking an afternoon walk like I normally do,” I say quickly. “And, yes, sometimes that takes me to the beach.”
“Did you happen to see Juniper?” she asks.
I nod slowly. “Yeah, I think so. I think they were filming or something. I don’t really know. I obviously didn’t interrupt.”
“Of course, you would never do such a thing, would you?” Sage says with a grin, and Rosie starts laughing.
“I’m happy that she’s getting opportunities.”
“Are you really?” Sage says. “I mean, you showed up in the middle of the night last night and you spent the night doing who knows what.”
Rosie’s giggles become louder, and Sage just winks at me.
“Is there a question here, Sage? Because I do have to get back to work.”
“I just want to know, what are your intentions with our cousin?”
“I don’t really know what you’re …”
“Oh, give it up, Rafe,” Sage says. “Obviously, you didn’t just happen to walk down to the beach because it’s your afternoon walk. Let’s be real. You wanted to go and spy on Juniper and see if she was making out with some hot TV star.”
I realize as I stare at her that maybe this is a serendipitous moment for me because maybe I should just ask Sage and Rosie what I should do.
It feels awkward and weird, and I don’t really want to, but if they are going to keep bringing up the subject to me, I will entertain it.
“Actually, you know what, Sage? You’re right. I did want to see how Juniper was getting on.”
Sage’s eyes widen in shock.
She can’t believe I’ve actually admitted it.
“So, you tell me, Sage, what should I do next?”
“You what? Is this a serious question?”
She licks the side of her ice cream cone, staring at my face.
I can tell she’s trying to figure out whether or not I’m being genuine.
“I’d like to take Juniper out on a date. I realize the timing seems off now that she’s on this reality show.”
“But you realize she’s hot and a hot commodity, and you don’t want someone else to get her?” Sage says.
I shrug.
Rosie looks me up and down. “If you really want a shot, you have to be honest with yourself, Rafe. What do you have to offer Juniper that another man can’t offer her?
And are you genuinely interested in her because you really want to be with her, or is it because you just can’t stand another man having her? ”
I look at her, surprised at the question.
“We may be young, but we’re not dumb, and we know men,” Sage says, hands on her hips.
“And Juniper is our favorite cousin. She’s literally the best, and we would do anything for her.
And she deserves a good man—like, a really good man.
We actually think she deserves a billionaire, but she doesn’t seem to want a billionaire, so you’re lucky. ”
I just stare at them, nonplussed. “Okay. So, you’re trying to tell me that I may not make enough money for her?”
Sage shrugs. “I don’t know how much money you make as a vet, and I don’t care. But the biggest question is, are you genuinely interested in Juniper?”
“I like her a lot,” I say honestly and nod. “Really like her. She’s a good woman, and I’m attracted to her, and I want to see where it goes. And I am not quite sure exactly how to approach this.”
“So, you thought instead of asking her out on a proper date, you’d give her an orgasm?” Sage says, shaking her head. “Like, why would you go for the physical before you got to know her?”
“I don’t know,” I shrug.
“Because he’s dumb,” Rosie rolls her eyes. “Like most men.”
“You were thinking with your small head, weren’t you?”
“I think I’m going to plead the Fifth here, girls. This is not a conversation I feel comfortable having with you both.”
They both start giggling.
“Oh man, why are you so emotionally immature?”
“I don’t think I’m emotionally immature,” I respond. “I think I’m interested in your cousin, and I would like to take her on a proper date. And, yeah, I’m sexually attracted to her as well. So, maybe, just maybe, I let that attraction lead. But I want her to see that it’s about more than that.”
“Oh,” Sage says. “So, ask her out.”
“To do what? When? Where?”
“I think you can figure it out,” Rosie says. “You seem like a smart enough guy.”
“And do you think she would be open to that?” I stare at them, waiting for a truthful honest. Needing to know if this was just one-sided.
Sage rolls her eyes and finishes her cone.
Neither one of them says anything.
“Is that a yes? Is that a no?” I prod.
“What to you think, Rafe? You know Juniper. If she had zero interest in you, do you really think she would’ve let you spend the night last night in her bed, naked? Do you really think she would’ve let you go down on her when she was on the phone? Come on now. Why are guys so dumb?”
I stare at them, and it’s my turn to smile. “Are you calling me dumb?”
“Yeah, I am.”
“That hurts my feelings.”
“No, it doesn’t,” she says, shaking her head. “But you know what will hurt your feelings?”
She takes a step forward and looks me straight in the eyes.
“If you hurt my cousin, if you fuck this up, if you fuck up her life, if you ruin her shot at being famous and meeting some hot and amazing guy because you’re a jackass, I’ll fuck you up. Me and Rosie both. And you won’t even see it coming.”
“The only reason we’re not fucking you up right now,” Rosie says, “is because we know Juniper likes you, and we’re pretty confident that you like her too. But man up. If you want her, go and get your girl and stop being a little dickhead about it.”
“I was trying to respect her, and she’s also Mia’s—”
“Oh my gosh, give it up. Sure, she’s Mia’s best friend. Many men have dated their sister’s best friend. It’s not super taboo. It’s not like she’s your stepsister or something.”
“Well, I know that, but …”
“Stop being an idiot, Rafe. If you like her, go for her. If you don’t, leave her alone.” Sage shakes her head. “You hear me? I want to hear by the end of the week that you’ve asked her on a date or you’ve disappeared off the face of the earth. One or the other.”
“I’m not sure I know how to disappear off the face of the earth.”
“We could make it happen,” Rosie says.
“Are you two in the Mafia and I just don’t know it?”
“Oh, wouldn’t you like to know?” Sage winks. “Come on, Rosie. Let’s go head to Salty Pages. I told Mia we’d take over for her this afternoon. Good seeing you, Rafe.”
They both offer me a small little wave before they head back down the street.
I stand there with a huge smile on my face because my conversation with them was refreshing, to say the least.
It was odd, and I wouldn’t be shocked if I found out they were the leaders of an organized crime gang.
But I am glad that Juniper has them.
They have her back.
And what they had to say was correct.
I need to make a move and make it something impressive, or I just need to back off.
I am into Juniper.
Not just kind of into her, but into her, into her.
And I have been for a long time.
I want her in my life, and I do not want to see her with anyone else.
So, I need to think of a way to let her know.
I need to think of a way to make her feel special.
And I need to think of a way to make this all happen fast because, as much as I hate to admit it, I need to be with her.
I want to spend every night with her.
And that isn’t going to happen unless we are in a real relationship.
I can’t believe that I’m finally ready to spend the rest of my life with someone.
I can’t believe that it’s Juniper. But I know deep inside that it’s always been her.
She’s the best part of me and she doesn’t even know it.
When I’m around her I’m funnier, more charming, more caring, more loving, more everything.
When I’m around her I feel like I’m living and not just surviving.
Now I just need to find out if she feels the same way. I need to make her my better half.