11. Dom
I’m going to hell, and I know exactly what I’m going to be tortured with. Emma’s smell, fading away because not only can I not have her, but I’m the reason she’s gone.
I sit in my office, wishing Emma had been sent home after fainting. Really, I do. Instead, she changes back into her uniform, tells her brother to go to hell, and goes back to work like nothing happened.
The girl has balls. I have to give her that.
But she should have gone home.
Anything to get her away from me.
No, not Emma.
She walks through the office and makes me want to gouge out someone’s eyes just for looking at her.
By someone, I mean Stryker.
Stryker, who hovers around her in dispatch and every time she walks into the bullpen like she’s going to collapse and he’s going to do whatever he can to keep it from happening.
“She’s fine,” I hear Linc tell him. “Back off, Stryker.”
Daisy barks, and I laugh at what I can only imagine is Remy ordering his dog to go after another deputy.
“You’ve got it almost as bad as I do.” Logan throws a wad of paper across my office and it lands in the garbage can. “Are you gonna do anything about it?”
“Can’t,” I answer. “She’s my rookie, and she’s going to the academy next week.” I give him the abridged version. The same one that would convince any other man to drop it.
Logan sighs and then leans back in the chair to grab my door handle and close it without actually getting up from his seat. Then he slams the feet of the chair back down and stares at me with all the intensity of a man on a mission.
“Don’t fuck it up, Dom.” He lowers his voice like we’re having a secret conversation about a mission with the chance of being overheard. “Don’t do what I did, man.”
I open my mouth to tell him that I’m not him. That I haven’t broken Emma’s heart like he did Poppy’s, but I can’t force the words out.
I can’t force the lie past my lips, because it would be a lie.
I hurt her, and I knew exactly what I was doing while I did it.
“I ruined her,” he admits darkly. “I took her, and I broke her, and I hit below the belt. I make sure that no one gets her because she belongs to me. But that was where I messed it all up. She’s not mine. She’s no one’s. And now, I just have to wait for her to see me again. To give me a chance. You don’t want to end up like me. To end up like Remy was. He pushed Parker away a long time ago. Right into Danny’s arms. Look at all that drama and chaos.” He waves a hand around. “It’s like we live in a soap opera where the men are idiots. You have the chance to eliminate all of that bullshit and get the girl from the start.” He huffs. “Okay, enough with the girl talk. I gotta go prance around the office and make sure that Poppy sees me here.” He gets up with a snort. “Ten bucks says she quits and moves to Alaska.” He lowers his voice again. “Don’t tell anyone what I told you, or I’ll convince Linc we need to murder you and get rid of the body.”
When he opens the door and walks out, I feel like I’ve just been given the only warning I ever will from him. Although, it isn’t like I’m going to open my mouth about his relationship with Poppy to anyone. Not only do I like being alive, but it isn’t my business.
Still, when I follow him out and see Stryker hovering over Emma, with her smiling up at him, I lose my cool.
The chief’s office is open, so I walk in without knocking.
“Dom.” Alex waves a hand at the empty chair. “Go ahead. It’s not like I don’t have an entire department to run and a detective who keeps making my job more difficult by the hour.”
“Stuff it, pops.” I laugh. “Thanks for bringing Logan on with such short notice. I know my leaving isn’t convenient.”
His eyes darken. “Not in the slightest. But at least you gave me notice. You could have just up and left, so I’m thankful. But don’t think this buys you an easy ride when you get back.” His pen taps against the desk, like it always does when he’s trying to figure something out. “How’s she doing?”
“Good,” I answer honestly. “She’s probably better than her brother when it comes to remembering information or coming up with a creative way to speak to citizens. She’s got the persona to be a cop. On the street, she’s very no-nonsense. Gives off the aura of someone six feet tall, instead of her five-foot frame.”
“She fainted today.” He raises an eyebrow. “Have any information on that? Something I should be aware of?”
“She’s pushing herself.” I find myself defending her. “She’s working out at lunch, after work, and probably beforehand too. I think she’s going to pass at the academy, without a doubt.”
“Good.” He nods. “You know, I’m gonna have to give half the department the day off when she graduates. They’re all related to her.”
“Get coverage from Maine State Police,” I offer.
While he rambles on about the inconvenience of having another agency cover our jurisdiction, I try to figure out if there’s a chance that I might make it home before she graduates. Hearing the details of everyone else being there sends a spike of jealousy straight into my brain that I can’t get rid of. Logistics start flying while I tune out my boss. The academy is only eighteen weeks, which means I have less than six weeks to play with for leeway. I know I’m gone at least twelve, but shit always tends to go sideways. At least it does when there’s a reason for me to be in play.
“When’s she leaving again?” I pull out my phone and open the calendar app, counting forward eighteen weeks from the answer he gives me, and put it in as a hard return date.
Commotion in the bullpen draws our attention, and I lead the way out of his office into utter chaos.
Daisy, completely ignoring a furious Remy, runs around the room, knocking into chairs, desks, trash cans, and people like they are nothing.
“Someone gave her a treat,” Logan calls out over the cacophony of noise.
“I’m that someone.” Emma laughs and throws another treat in the air for Daisy. “She’s such a good girl.”
“I don’t know whether to yell or laugh,” Alex says from my side. “She’s not technically doing anything wrong, but Daisy’s an asshole.”
I stare at Emma, smiling and cheering for the dog who keeps spinning around and jumping in the air like there’s a pogo stick under her back legs. “Let her do it. Her life is about to change.” Everything is about to change.
In the midst of all the noise, I forget what I even came to talk to Alex about. But Emma does that to me. Her presence makes everything chaotic and noisy, all without even trying.
Alex turns around and shuts himself in his office, leaving me in the bullpen with the rest of the noise, and I have the briefest moment of regret for defending the chaos. Until Emma pauses and looks at me with her heart in her eyes.
Daisy jumps up on her lap, and Emma looks away to give the working dog a rubdown.
Remy joins me on the far side of the room, crossing his arms as he watches what’s happening. “Why are you letting her do that?” Usually, Remy at least tries to keep his K-9 partner from destroying the world.
He stares at Daisy and then looks over at Linc and Emma before making eye contact with me. “Just got back from the vet. She’s got cancer in her bones. They don’t know how long she’s got.” His voice is rough with emotion, and I can’t blame him. “But they’re gonna do their best to save her.”
Daisy isn’t just a service animal. She isn’t just another working K-9 partner. Daisy started as Danny’s partner in the Marine Corps. And after he died, Remy moved mountains to make sure that she could come home, to be with family. When Remy got home, he fought for Daisy to go to work with him.
Daisy’s entire life has been spent serving with Remy, Danny, Linc, and me, along with the rest of our team. Losing her will be just as bad as losing Danny had been.
“Life’s too short, man.” Remy’s words catch me by surprise.
“I know.” I can’t remember a time when Daisy wasn’t there, reminding all of us about living our best lives.
“I don’t think you do.” He lowers his voice. “You’re going back. To the sand. I don’t blame you, because you were always the best over there. But you’re going back without us. I know we’re all butting into your business, and I know you’re tired of it. Believe me, I know. But you’ll be a fool if you leave without trying.” He doesn’t have to say her name. He doesn’t have to say anything else because I’m stuck and he knows it.
Like she knows we’re talking about her, Emma and Daisy both look up. My eyes are locked on Emma, and I can’t look away when she brushes a strand of her bangs out of her face. Her hazel eyes flash with unrestrained humor as her eyes lock on mine. Then that little minx winks at me.
Winks.
Right in front of everyone.
Remy snorts, not missing a beat. “Daisy.” He whistles sharply. “Time to go to work.”
Immediately, Daisy stops what she’s doing and sits back on her haunches. Her chest heaves and her tongue lolls out of her mouth, but she sits at attention like she’s been trained to.
“Thank you, Remy.” Emma smiles brightly. “I needed that after that headache earlier.”
“No problem,” he answers with a pat on her shoulder. Then he and Daisy walk out without another word.
Work gets back to normal, as much as it can with the shift change happening.
I check my watch and then decide I’ve done enough for the day. Besides, I need to get home and get the fire started, because Linc is going to show up whether I want him to or not. With everyone from our unit in tow, too.
I’m walking out, doing my best to ignore the women’s locker room where Emma has vanished to change, before the door opens and I’m caught completely off guard.
Well, not completely. I was staring at the door even if I want to lie to myself and say that I wasn’t.
She walks out with her duffel hanging on her arm and a familiar shirt on her back, almost big enough for it to be a dress.
It’s dark blue, emblazoned with bright silver letters reading MCJA across the front. Her leggings poke out from under it, and her blond hair is wrapped in a bun on top of her head, making her look like she’s sixteen all over again.
Except when she walks by, leaving me with my mouth hanging open, I see the name plastered across the back.
“Hey,” I call out, not caring who’s watching. “That’s my shirt.”
“Yeah.” Emma looks at me over her shoulder, not quite turning all the way around. “It is. If you want it back, you know where to find it.”
“Where did Emma get your shirt?” Stryker scratches his head, not understanding the implication in Emma’s words.
Linc, however, claps his hands together with glee. “Oh shit, I get it now. That’s what happened to your truck.”
Another one of the officers who works nights, Carter Malone, snorts. “Avery stole my truck once. That was a fun night. I mean, fun for her. Not so much for my balls.”
Ignoring the growing crowd of people who can’t mind their own business, I turn and walk right back into Alex’s office.
That’s what I was headed to do earlier.
I almost forgot.
When he looks up at me with a surprised expression at my sudden intrusion, I bite my tongue for about a second before deciding to hell with it.
“I can’t be her training officer anymore.”
“You said the kiss didn’t mean anything.” His eyes flash, and I want to punch him for the reminder, even if he is my boss. “In fact, I seem to recall you assuring me that you were leaving for deployment, so it wouldn’t be an issue.”
“I lied.”
“Did you sleep with her?”
Suddenly, getting the fourth degree from my boss feels a hell of a lot like I’m getting it from Emma’s dad instead. There’s heat rising up the back of my neck, finding its way into my face and I’m struggling to breathe through it.
“Why does that matter?”
“Because.” I can see the wheels turning in his head. “If you slept with her while you hold a position of power over her, it not only complicates things on a personal level but also on a professional level. You could be putting the department in a position of liability. Not to mention the fact that she’s my goddaughter. So yeah, if you slept with her, it’s an issue.”
“No,” I tell him honestly. “I haven’t slept with her.”
“Good.” My boss waves me off. “Means the department doesn’t have to fire you. But her father might have to kill you. That’s his problem, though, not mine.”
Two can play at the asshole game. “But I’m going to sleep with her.” He doesn’t need to know that Emma is most likely going to reject me. And that I’m going to have to grovel to earn my way back into her good graces. That’s a conversation for me and Emma. “Which is why I can’t be her training officer.”
“You’re a pain in my ass.” Alex pushes his chair back. “Do you know how much paperwork I’m going to have to do for this shit?”
“I don’t care.” I turn on my heel. “That’s why you’re the chief of police.”