6. CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER FIVE
SASHA
J ust remember to act surprised when Nick finally tells you what we’re doing tomorrow.
I’d received that text not long after Zeke left my suite. It was the first time he’d messaged me something that wasn’t work-related. Going through our message history it was only ever about which rooms the smoke detectors needed changing in, where Nick was, and what needed to be fixed onboard.
If I didn’t know he was straight, I’d assume that he had the hots for my friend.
I’ll act surprised, don’t worry. Now, what does one wear when jumping off a plane?
Stick to sneakers and closed shoes. Ditch the heels you wore last night and don’t even think about wearing any type of dress. You need to be comfortable so sweat pants, tights, or even jeans.
The only person who ever told me what to wear was my father, but since I asked Zeke I figured I’d let it go.
“I’m scared ” was all I texted back.
Usually when I was excited about something I could never sleep the night before, but I had a feeling that any lack of rest I may have tonight would be because I’d be jumping out of the plane the next day.
Nick and I will be there. Don’t be scared. There’s nothing to fear unless the plane goes down.
Jesus, Zeke, what the fuck?
I texted through a few angry emojis and stuck my finger up at him.
He responded with a little devil face. Zeke really liked to taunt me like it was a sport to get me riled up.
Asshole.
I got up and grabbed something small to eat from the mini fridge in my room. As much as I was starving, I figured I’d start slow to reduce the chance of throwing up again. Once my stomach was settled, I jumped back in bed and received a call from Nick.
“Zeke get you home alright?” he asked first. “How are you feeling?”
“You left me with that jerk. The only man in this beautiful country that hates me as much as I hate him.”
Again, hate was a strong word. I didn’t hate the guy. I was just confused by his attitude toward me.
Nick laughed. “Zeke doesn’t hate you.”
“I know he does. I mean sure, I know not everyone will like me and that’s fine. But seriously, Nick. I’ve done nothing wrong to the man.”
He disliked me from the moment he started but got along with everyone else. What was up with that?
“He’s never spoken bad about you before,” Nick assured me. “I even thought he had a crush on you because he can never seem to take his eyes off you. Not even for a second.”
Maybe I had noticed that a few times, but his eyes were usually filled with disdain.
“You’re not staying in your room the entire day, are you? We’re only here for a couple more nights.”
“I wasn’t planning on it.” Actually I was.
“Good. Meet me on Deck 5. We’ll go spend the afternoon at the beach before the party at night.”
Was it just going to be the two of us or was he going to invite everyone, especially Zeke?
“I’ll check if the others want to meet up since they’re off as well.”
Great. Just great.
T he harsh afternoon sun reflected against the Caribbean turquoise ocean. The waters shimmered as the soft waves poured onto the shore.
I’d lathered almost an entire lube of sunscreen suited to the climate on every part I could reach. And the parts I couldn’t, I covered with a sarong.
I was right. It wasn’t just me and Nick. He’d invited everyone from last night. They were worse for the wear as I could see their eyes sunken in from their late-night shenanigans.
Zeke was slightly uninterested, though he did sneak in a few peeks at me from the side gap in his sunglasses. I tried to act unaffected but I’d be lying if I said it didn’t do something to me.
“Is anyone actually going into the water?” Kate’s head rested on her knees as she tucked her legs closer to her chest. She shielded her face away from the heat.
I wanted to jump in and cool myself down. It was humid and I felt my eyes burn with sweat.
The group next to us on the right were locals and had a portable stereo playing some incredibly addicting music. There was a stage set up in the middle of the beach, so I assumed some DJ or artists would be playing some tunes during the night’s party.
People were dancing around, swimming, and even sunbathing in the nude.
“Ugh, it’s so hot,” I groaned. “I’m heading into the water if you want to join me, Kate.”
She twisted her lips while she pondered, finally deciding to stay behind. “I’m good. I might hang back for now.”
I stood from the sand and dropped my pink sarong. I used to prefer wearing one-piece suits but since I enjoyed my freedom more, I was a little daring, choosing to rock a simple black bikini.
Dusting myself from the white grains of sand, I walked over toward the ocean, zig-zagging between a sea of people, some naked and on their stomachs.
As soon as I stepped in, I felt the immediate rush of cool temperature against my toes, which then spread to my ankles and shins the higher the waves came crashing. Finally, my legs were submerged and I felt confident enough to dive in.
Big mistake. My nipples froze and I gasped for air as I emerged from the water. The temperature was deceiving when I first walked in but my body quickly got used to it.
The water was calm. I floated with my arms out and let the waves lift me slightly before gently bringing me down again. They slowly crashed behind me on the shore. The sun heated me on the outside but I knew the protection was doing its job.
I was alone for about a good twenty minutes before someone swam up beside me. It was Zeke. This guy was everywhere I was lately.
His thick hair slicked back when he dunked under the water. He swam a couple of meters ahead and then came up for air, this time facing me.
Zeke’s body was something to admire. Broad shoulders, well-formed muscles, but not like an intense bodybuilder whose veins would stick out. I’m talking about someone who could wrap their arms around you and you’d feel like the safest person in the world. He was perfectly fit like Alex O’Loughlin.
“You drool when you’re not sleeping too.”
“I do not,” I whined again. He’d caught me gawking at him and there was no way to convince him otherwise.
Geez what the hell, Sasha?
Some saliva had fallen onto my chin. I must have been staring at him a little too pervy. That was so unlike me. What had I turned into? I swore more which was not very ladylike of me, but there was something cathartic about curse words that used to be forbidden to even whisper. I would hide who I was back then for the sake of my father and that made me a fraud to myself.
Now I’m just me. And apparently, a pervert too.
Zeke swam a little closer and stopped right where I could almost smell his breath. He may have had peanut butter and banana for lunch.
We were both treading the water watching one another. He swallowed a few times and his tongue darted out of his mouth at least twice.
“What’s wrong?” I asked him. The silence was killing me.
He wanted to say something to me. I knew it by his blank stare and the way he sometimes would open his mouth but nothing came out.
“Do I have more drool on my face?” I wiped my lips to make sure nothing was there.
Zeke slowly shook his head and then he finally said something, “I’m thinking of asking Kate out. What do you think of her?”
Well, that was disappointing and again, confusing. My shoulders dropped before I hunched over a little. I broke eye contact with him briefly. “Kate’s lovely. You should definitely ask her out.” Before he could say anything else, my eyes caught sight of a rogue wave coming straight at us from behind Zeke. “Lookout,” I yelled.
Normally I’d dive underneath it but it was too high and crashed right on top of me. I felt myself spin under the waves and didn’t know which way was up. I even swallowed some sea water which tasted like salty crap. It wasn’t until a pair of strong arms guided me out from under that I was able to breathe again. I gasped for air but some more water caught in my throat. I coughed it all out and noticed Zeke still had a tight hold on me.
“You okay?” he asked. His expression was one of concern when he stood still to observe me. That was before he pulled me against him. “Sash, are you okay?” he checked again.
“I’m fine.” I managed to let out a laugh. “That was actually fun.”
I was right. Zeke’s arms did feel safe. I was tempted to stay in them until I reminded myself that he was thinking about asking Kate out.
Zeke furrowed his brows when I pushed back and was able to tread the water again. I didn’t want to be near him, at least not this close. “Thanks for saving my ass, again.”
“Yeah, let’s not do that again either.”
I cracked another smile. “I’m gonna head back out.”
“I’m gonna stay in the water a little while longer,” he said.
“Catch you later.” I turned and swam right up to where I was able to stand, then walked to the shore to meet the others.
I wanted to get to know Zeke. The person who he was, what he loved, and what he hated, besides me. But it was clear he wanted nothing to do with me. He wasn’t interested in knowing who I was or anything about my past.
I guess he wasn’t joking when he said didn’t want to be friends with me at all.
T he sun lowered to the horizon and the stars brightened the sky. A local DJ played music on the stage that’d been empty just hours before. Crackling flames lit up the entire beach intensifying the heat, so I only needed to wear a light sundress. The six of us joined the group that was next to us during the day, who’d also decided to stay for the beach party.
One guy in the crowd caught my attention. His blue eyes mirrored the deep color of the ocean. He looked slightly younger than I was, but not by much. It must have had something to do with his lack of facial hair.
He decided to come over and talk to me as soon as I shot him a smile. “Name’s Ben,” he said, reaching out his hand.
“I’m Sasha,” I responded by greeting him back. His fingers were soft and gentle and his hands felt like they’d spent the majority of time in moisturizing gloves.
“Where are you from?” He crossed his legs and lifted them so his elbows could rest on them.
“All over really,” I said. “Originally from Greece but I moved to the U.S. when I was twelve. And now my home is wherever I am. What about you?”
“I’m from the U.K and I’m here for a couple more nights before I head back.”
“When did you arrive?”
“Yesterday. I was on board the Asherah.”
Oh shit. He was a guest. I thought he looked familiar.
“So, I was thinking of getting out of here,” he mentioned boldly. “Wanna hang?”
“And do what?”
My question caught him off guard. He laughed softly and put his head down for a second before looking at me. “You know? Hang…”
I was not the type of girl he hoped I was. “Thanks for the invite but I think I’m just gonna stay back here with my friends.”
And Zeke.
“Are you sure?” He pointed back and forth between us. “I think we have something here.”
Think again.
“She already told you no, pal.” Zeke’s deep voice drove behind me and I turned to look at him.
“Sorry, I didn’t know she was taken.” Ben put his hands up defensively before rising from the sand. He walked away and sat next to another group of people before introducing himself to one of the girls there.
“You’re welcome,” Zeke said. He made himself comfortable by sitting right next to me.
“I didn’t know I needed rescuing,” I told him. “Why are you always around to rescue me?”
“Why are you always needing saving?”
“I was handling him just fine.” I folded my arms together and tucked them over my breasts. “You didn’t need to say anything.”
“The guy’s a tool. He was flirting with every girl on the beach today.” Zeke shook his head in disbelief. “Scared a few off even.”
“And I suppose you were watching him the whole time, then?”
He lazily shrugged his shoulders. “A dickhead like that… it’s hard not to notice.”
Takes one to know one.
By midnight there was a slight gust of wind that cooled the air down. The thousand-strong pairs of feet that danced caused vibrations beneath the sand. The flames licking the air shone even brighter.
I decided to go for a walk along the shoreline to clear my head. The others were still around the fire, talking and drinking. Except for Nick and Zeke, who made the obvious choice along with me to stay sober. My excuse was that I didn’t want to spend the night throwing up again. Nick was obviously relieved because he didn’t have to ruin the surprise for me.
I didn’t stray too far away from them. I could see their figures around the campfire if I really squinted my eyes. People held glow sticks as they danced, and there were a few umbrellas still up from the day. Flashing floodlights helped liven up the beach and put a spotlight on the Capoeira Brazilian Martial Art dancers, who were performing majestic acrobatic and complex movements including handstands and kicks. There were incredibly gorgeous women with all body types enjoying what was probably one of the best parties I’ve been to. It was like a rave I’d heard about but never seen in person. Brazil was probably already in my top three favorite places I have visited and it was only my second night.
The sand felt soft and grainy between my toes. I had taken off my shoes and left them with the others. The light, cool water rolled in so gently and greeted me like a friend.
“Kinda dangerous you being out here by yourself, don’t you think?” Zeke’s voice came out of nowhere, though I should have expected it. He had a habit of surprising me at odd times.
“I’m not here by myself now, am I?”
“I guess not.”
I didn’t turn around to face him. I just kept my attention on the ocean ahead, and watched the waves crash further out before rumbling back in.
The crowd behind us was loud but their voices drowned out when someone called out a name. “Baris,” they yelled excitedly. “Don’t. Please stop.”
I swear I’ve never turned my head quicker than I did right then. Just the sound of his name brought back painful memories amongst the sea of good ones.
To the far right, there was a couple in the water. The guy, Baris, had dunked under and emerged between the girl’s legs. Now she was over his shoulders. She screamed again when he tossed her into the water. I used to smile like that. In love. Once upon a time when I was happier. Now I smiled, but I felt lonely sometimes.
Tears puddled in my eyes but I quickly blinked them away and I felt a sudden wave of nausea. “Why are you here?” I asked Zeke.
“If you hadn’t noticed, there’s a beach party going on right now,” he replied with a touch of sarcasm.
“I mean here,” I clarified. “In this very spot.” I turned my neck to the left to look at him. “What’s going on with you?”
“What do you mean?”
I hadn’t forgotten that he confessed he wanted to ask Kate out, but instead of spending time with her, he was with me.
“You’re like in between seasons in Australia.” One of my other top three favorite places I’ve visited. “You’re hot one minute and cold the next.”
“You think I’m hot?”
I knew it was meant to be a joke but I wasn’t really in the mood for bullshit, especially after hearing my old flame’s name being called out in the middle of Brazil. “You’re making it really difficult for me to enjoy myself.”
I shouldn’t let him affect me so much but he rubbed me the wrong way.
“I’m sorry.” His apology was sincere. “That’s not my intention.”
I wasn’t usually so confrontational but I needed to find out what his deal was. “So, why are you such an ass to me?”
“I didn’t realize I was.”
“Yes, you did.”
He let out the loudest sigh. “Look, I just wanted to come to tell you that Nick and I are leaving,” Zeke said. “We’ve got an early start tomorrow, remember?”
I glanced back toward the ocean and watched the stars twinkle ahead. “I’ll just catch up with you later.”
“You’re staying?”
“Yeah, I am.”
“I don’t think you heard me,” Zeke said. “We need to sleep for the jump tomorrow. The three of us can cab it back to the boat.”
“No, thanks.”
“You’re not staying by yourself, Sasha.”
Ugh. He was so bossy. “I won’t be by myself. The others are staying, right?” I reminded him. Zeke nodded. “Well, I’ll cab it back with them.”
“They’re wasted and won’t be able to look after you.”
“I can take care of myself,” I said sternly, then glared at him. “I don’t need you to tell me what time I need to go to bed. You’re not my damn father.” I didn’t mean to raise my voice at him but the anger in me had risen and my frustrations took over. But just these last two days, he had confused the hell out of me. I got whiplash from his change in attitude. After a sharp intake of air, my breath came out choppy. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sound rude.”
“Don’t even worry about it,” he replied. “We’re leaving in five if you change your mind.”
Zeke didn’t even give me a chance to respond or tell him thanks. There was a loud splash of water with each step he made when he turned and walked away.
I’d been told that large bodies of water were supposed to help calm your nerves, like beaches and fish tanks. This one didn’t seem to be doing a very good job of it whenever Zeke was next to me.
Light sobs wailed between my lips and my hand clamped over my mouth to stop anyone from hearing me. I didn’t want to make a scene in front of my colleagues or a bunch of strangers.
Life was hard sometimes. As much as I loved it and found a new way to appreciate living, it wasn’t easy. I just wished I had someone to share it with.
There were two minutes left for me to get back to the group if I was going to cab it with Nick and Zeke. I wanted to see if I could get some damn sleep before the jump I was already second-guessing taking part in. I was this close to telling Nick to cancel the whole thing but I knew he’d be disappointed, and to be honest, I’d be disappointed in myself as well. I wanted to experience everything life had to offer and take advantage of the freedom I was lucky to have.
I stayed in the spot for longer than I anticipated. By the time I went back to the group, Nick and Zeke had already left. I figured I’d get back anyway so I flagged down a cab and arrived at the boat in twenty minutes.
All of us workers had suites in the same section of the cruise. Mine wasn’t too far from Nick’s, and Zeke’s was just a few doors from his. We’d sometimes run into each other before or after our shifts.
There was still sand between my toes and since I didn’t want to transfer that onto my bed, I decided to have a quick shower.
I checked my phone after I got dressed and there was a text from Zeke. You’re back in your suite, right?
Are you stalking me?
Yes.
I internally rolled my eyes and texted him back. That’s kinda creepy, dude.
Relax. Just making sure you’re ready for tomorrow. I know you’re probably freaking out right now.
Not just about the jump apparently.
Keeping tabs on me, are you?
You said you wanted to be friends, right?
I liked it better when we weren’t friends. In fact, I preferred it.
I thought you were the nice one. This text of his made me smile.
You thought wrong. Anyway, I need to sober up and get some sleep. I had a few drinks just now to calm my nerves since you didn’t let me drink at the beach.
You’re drunk?!?!?!
Maybe a little, I teased. I hadn’t had anything at all, but I felt like messing with him.
Suddenly, there was a knock on my door. “Open up, Sasha.”
Shit.
I grabbed my gray silk summer robe from behind the black chair and quickly slipped it on before opening the door. “Are you seriously here right now?”
He cupped my face in his hands and pushed me, driving me back some steps. Zeke leaned closer and took a whiff of my breath. I froze when I remembered that I hadn’t brushed my teeth. But that wasn’t the problem at this very moment.
“Zeke, what are you doing?”
“You’re not drunk?”
“I was joking,” I told him. “Something is seriously wrong with you.”
His warm hands still clutched my face and his gaze lingered on mine. It kept me in a frozen state, especially since he didn’t move either. I felt his breath on my face. His jaw tensed and the light disappeared from his eyes. I didn’t flinch one bit. I was afraid of what he might do in what seemed to be a hypnotic state.
“Zeke,” I managed to say his name gently. “You’re a little unhinged and it’s scaring me.”
It’s when I said those last words that he shook his head and took a step back. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to.”
There seemed to be a lot of things he didn’t mean to do.
“Are you okay?” I checked. Zeke looked quite embarrassed by his actions. His face lit up like a red balloon stuck in a drain.
“I’m fine. Get some rest.” He quickly turned away and walked out the door before slamming it shut.
If I had some deadbolts I would double lock that door. Get some rest, his voice mocked in my head. How the hell was I going to sleep after that?