Chapter 3
Nora and Dixie were good friends even though they hadn’t known each other that long.
About eighteen months ago Nora had picked up a flyer for a new local club, having found it on a table in her usual coffee shop.
With nothing else planned, she’d decided she might as well check it out.
It had been wintertime and, if she was being honest, she went along purely out of intrigue at the title of the proposed new club rather than anything else, as the flyer promised rafting and cocktails – a combination even she struggled to calculate the odds of danger and death for.
But it turned out to be a printing error that Dixie hadn’t spotted.
The first few had come out correctly and read ‘Crafting & Cocktails’.
Only three people had turned up. They were Nora, a man called Jay and an elderly lady called Renee.
Renee was the most disappointed of all to discover that they were tackling crochet squares rather than white-water rafting as she had been looking for an adrenaline rush that the sheltered housing was not providing and thought rafting and cocktails was right up her street.
She’d been a young woman during the swinging sixties and was not how Nora pictured the average eighty-year-old.
With short, stylish, light blonde hair, bright red lipstick and a sheepskin flying jacket, she had more than an air of a rebel Helen Mirren about her.
Despite Renee’s initial disappointment, after a couple of Porn-star Martinis she had knocked out a number of granny squares that evening, even if some of them had been a little less than perfect.
Jay had also been disappointed, but to his credit he had joined in and with some help from Dixie and Renee became quite the dab hand with a pair of knitting needles.
And so the odd bunch had become firm friends and met every Tuesday in the little side room at their local community centre on the outskirts of Melton Mowbray.
Renee liked to call it the ‘bloody broom cupboard’ because it pleased her to add a mild swear word to most of her sentences.
But the bigger rooms were used by the local Brownie pack and a wellness class, so it all worked out.
‘They’re buggering about with the heating again.’ Renee patted the radiator. ‘What idiot puts the heating on this time of year?’
‘I think the caretaker is doing a check,’ said Dixie.
‘He’s not on the last few rows of a double-bed-sized blanket, now is he?’ Renee lifted one end of the impressive piece she had crocheted. A carnival of reds, pinks and purples with a distinct tulip border. ‘I’m hotter than a Scotch bonnet’s bum crack under here.’
‘Do chillies have bum cracks?’ asked Dixie, looking confused.
‘I love the colours in that,’ said Jay, picking up one end of Renee’s blanket. He was still doing granny squares, although they were getting more intricate.
‘Thanks,’ said Renee. ‘If you could keep wafting the blanket that’s sending a lovely breeze to my—’
‘Anyway this week’s cocktail is …’ Dixie left a dramatic pause to no effect. ‘A Painkiller.’
‘I’m on enough of those buggers,’ said Renee. ‘Bloody arthritis in my knee is playing up again. Go on then, what’s in the cocktail?’ she asked.
‘Rum, pineapple juice, orange juice (from a carton, not fresh), with creamed coconut. It’s meant to have freshly grated nutmeg on top too, but I’ve brought this.’ She dusted the already poured drinks with some ground nutmeg from a little jar.
Renee was first to taste hers. ‘Lovely, but could do with more rum.’
‘You always say that,’ pointed out Nora, and she took a sip of hers before cracking on with her knitting.
‘Three things to update you all on,’ said Dixie, and Jay and Renee froze. Nora carried on knitting her project as she figured she knew what was coming. She was working on a jumper for her dad’s birthday and she needed to get on with it.
Dixie took a deep breath. ‘I’ve got a discount code for the online wool place we all like. I’ve lost my job and—’
‘Oh bad luck,’ said Renee.
‘Dixie, that’s awful,’ said Jay. ‘I’m so sorry. Are you OK?’
Dixie grinned. ‘I am great. Thanks to Nora it’s the best thing that could have happened. I drew up a list and now I am absolutely focused on my next venture.’
‘That’s a splendid attitude,’ said Renee. ‘What’s your new job?’
‘I’m going to be a social media influencer,’ she said proudly, pausing her crochet to watch for their responses. ‘Instagram-focused mainly.’
Nora gave what she hoped was an encouraging nod.
‘Sounds blinking brilliant to me,’ said Jay. ‘All the big brands are reaching out to influencers to spread campaigns. It’s absolutely the future of marketing. Well done you.’
Renee was squinting at Dixie. ‘Sounds like gibberish to me. Who do you work for?’
‘Myself,’ said Dixie, pulling back her shoulders.
‘Hmm. Good luck with that.’ Renee went back to speed crocheting.
‘I need to get established first,’ said Dixie, looking less certain.
‘You really only need your mobile phone and an angle,’ said Jay.
‘What do you mean by an angle?’ asked Renee.
Jay put down his knitting and gave her his full attention.
‘There are lots of people on social media. Big-name celebs the brands are always going to want to work with, the reality TV lot who do pretty well … There’s all sorts really but it’s a lot easier if you are already famous.
’ Dixie’s smile slid from her face. Jay noticed and hastily continued.
‘But,’ he said, waving his hands in circles as if winding himself up, ‘among the millions of wannabes there are the canny ones who have carved out a niche for themselves. They’ve done something a little different so they appeal to the masses but also stand out from the crowd. You could easily be one of those.’
‘Nope, all bloody gibberish to me,’ said Renee. ‘Times like this I wish I hadn’t given up smoking pot.’
Jay ignored Renee and carried on. ‘There are too many people doing it for you to follow everyone but you can find people who interest you. There are parents dealing with kids of all ages, the “mumfluencer” if you will.’ He left a pause for laughter but there wasn’t any.
‘Gamers are very popular. Fitness is a biggie – there’s everything from puppy yoga to unicycling.
’ Dixie wasn’t looking any happier. ‘If you enjoy knitting, you can follow people who do the same. They post videos with tips and hacks and share their latest projects. Is that what you’re going to do? ’ asked Jay.
Dixie swallowed hard. ‘I don’t know yet. I’m just building my following.’
‘Cool. How many have you got?’ he asked.
‘Two hundred and thirty-four now.’
‘That’s a lot of people,’ said Renee, finally looking impressed.
Nora was shaking her head for Renee’s benefit.
‘You can have a damn good party with two hundred people.’ Renee seemed to focus on a spot on the wall.
‘We had one hell of a night in sixty-five, until Cilla started singing. Luckily the Monty Python lot drowned her out until one of them got punched on the hooter. Someone chucked up in my bath and I don’t know what Norman Wisdom did to my potted orchid but it never flowered again after that night. ’ Renee chuckled. ‘Happy times.’
Jay pulled out his phone. ‘I’ll follow you on Instagram.’ He tapped away until he found Dixie’s profile. ‘There you go. Now you have two hundred and thirty-five followers.’
‘Thanks,’ said Dixie. She was also now checking her phone. ‘Jay, you’ve got three thousand, seven hundred and something followers!’
‘He is an actor,’ said Nora.
‘It’s not many really. Ryan Reynolds has over fifty million,’ said Jay. ‘But we all have to start somewhere.’
‘I guess,’ said Dixie. ‘I’m going to need loads before companies will pay me, aren’t I?’
‘According to the internet,’ said Nora, ‘not a reliable source, but still – it says you need a minimum of five thousand followers, and with good engagement and affiliate product links you could make a thousand pounds a year.’
‘That’s not much, is it?’ said Dixie.
‘That would barely keep me in gin,’ said Renee, more to herself than the group.
‘Maybe I would have been better being a living statue.’ Dixie stared at her yarn. ‘And now I’ve lost count of my stitches.’
‘Don’t give up at the first hurdle,’ said Nora. ‘You simply need to think about what your angle is.’ She looked at Jay and he nodded vigorously. ‘Once you know that, then you can start to target followers and build your brand. You’ve got this.’ Nora did her best to sound positive.
‘I guess.’ Dixie didn’t sound convinced.
‘Can you see yourself being an influencer?’ asked Nora. ‘Is it something you think you’d enjoy?’
‘Visualization is a great technique. Fake it till you make it. Imagine yourself doing the thing you want to do and then you’ll do it,’ said Jay, losing conviction the more he went on.
‘How does that work exactly?’ asked Dixie.
‘It’s not bleeding magic, is it?’ Renee knocked back the rest of her Painkiller cocktail. ‘If you can see it happening in your mind then you’re tricking your brain into believing it’s possible.’
‘I couldn’t have put it better,’ said Nora.
‘I have to believe first and then it’ll happen?’ said Dixie, brightening up.
Nora nodded. ‘You need to believe but then you need to take action. That’s the only way anything ever happens.’
‘Then I have to come up with an angle pretty quickly.’ Dixie became animated. ‘Like knitting for prisoners or cocktails for pets or making friends with wild animals …’
‘Maybe have a bit of a think about that,’ said Nora, topping up Dixie’s glass.
‘Yeah, good idea.’ The others both agreed.