Chapter 4
Nora was getting ready to leave the house on Friday evening when a key went into her front door.
For a second she wondered what was going on.
Her imagination conjured up a number of scenarios where she died horribly in every single one.
But the images disappeared as soon as her parents walked in chatting happily to each other.
‘Mum, you gave me a fright,’ said Nora, giving her a hug.
‘Why? Who else has a key?’ asked Una.
‘Nobody, although my neighbour has one in a box locked with a combination for emergencies. Anyway, your key is just for when I’m away.’ This was not the first time she’d had this conversation with her parents.
‘Put the chain on if you’re worried,’ said her dad, kissing her cheek and walking through to the living room carrying a shopping bag.
‘Actually, guys, I’m just going out. I’m climbing tonight.’ Nora indicated the front door but no one was paying attention.
‘I thought you would be out, which is why I used my key,’ said Una, lifting her chin.
‘It’s always lovely to see you both, but why have you come round if you thought I was going to be out?’ Nora checked her watch. There was only about five minutes before she needed to leave. She hated being late for anything.
Nora waited for her mum to reply but she just stared at her and smiled. It was the exact same thing she did when people used words she didn’t understand. ‘Dad? Why are you here?’
‘Your mother thinks you’re hiding—’
‘Ali!’ shouted her mum.
‘What do you think I’m hiding?’ asked Nora, amused by the horror on her mother’s face at being ratted out by her husband. ‘Treasure? A man? An illness?’ It was only fleeting but her mother’s expression changed. ‘You think I’m sick?’
‘Nooo,’ said her mother. ‘Because you would tell me, wouldn’t you? You would say if something was wrong? Anything not right with you. Yes?’
‘She thinks you’re too skinny,’ called her dad from the other room.
‘Ali, I swear, one day your mouth—’
‘Mum, I’m fine. I’m not too skinny. I’m in the green zone on the BMI chart along with 29 per cent of the population. I’m perfectly fine.’
‘You have no fat on you. Only muscle. It is not healthy. Women are meant to have curves.’
‘Actually, Mum, it is healthy.’
‘I disagree. You need stuffing up.’ Una gestured with her hands.
‘Mum, I’m stuffed up enough, thanks. What were you going to do? Load my cupboards with doughnuts?’
‘I made a goulash … Ali! Bring the goulash.’
Nora knew they meant well but they did drive her slightly potty. ‘Thank you. I think. Can you pop it in the fridge please? And now I really do need to leave.’
Nora’s other hobby was indoor climbing. She loved to climb, and as the indoor version was approximately 35 per cent safer than the outdoor version, was lots of fun and had safety at its core, it ticked all her boxes.
She went to a smallish club on the way to Loughborough where the walls were regularly updated and the people were friendly.
Climbing wasn’t exactly a team sport but to do it safely Nora did need a partner who could belay and for that she had Jay.
Handily he had been looking for something exciting when it became clear Dixie’s club did not involve rafting of any description.
Nora and Jay had discovered a mutual interest in climbing and a partnership had been formed.
Jay made her laugh and they had an easy friendship.
As they lived near each other, they travelled together and took it in turns to drive.
Jay parked and they walked inside. Coming out of the sports centre was a group of boys at the younger end of the teenage spectrum.
‘Hey!’ shouted one of them, and he began pointing frantically at Jay.
‘You’re that guy.’ His friends looked both alarmed and embarrassed by his actions.
‘He’s that man on the advert.’ They all stared at Jay as he and Nora walked up the steps.
As the penny dropped, the lads all started burping loudly. This happened quite a lot.
‘Thanks, boys,’ said Jay, giving them a wave and ushering Nora inside as the youngsters fell about laughing.
‘You OK?’ asked Nora.
‘Yeah. It’s the price of fame,’ he joked. ‘One day I would like to be famous for something other than burping a lot in an indigestion advert,’ he added wistfully.
‘One day,’ said Nora, and she gave him a reassuring pat on the shoulder.
They got changed and met on the mats by the climbing wall where other climbers were putting on shoes and harnesses.
Another regular was Trent. He liked to climb in a tight-fitting racer vest and even tighter shorts that left little to the imagination about how excited he was about climbing.
In contrast, Jay favoured a long-sleeved top and baggy joggers.
Trent and Jay were like the yin and yang of men.
Trent was tall and blond with muscles like the Hulk whereas Jay was not much taller than Nora, classically handsome with a slender build and the ability to wiggle his ears.
Trent did a few one-armed press-ups for no apparent reason.
That level of warm-up wasn’t necessary for climbing but there were a couple of women watching from the reception desk so that was most likely why he was putting on a display.
‘Hey, check this out,’ said Jay, wiggling his bum as he showed off his new chalk bag.
‘Very nice,’ said Nora. ‘How’s things with work?’ she asked as they roped up.
‘I had four auditions this week,’ he said, looking quite pleased.
‘That’s brilliant. I hope one of them hires you.’
‘Thanks. Because I also had three rejections so it all hangs on the truck company health and safety video.’ He grimaced and crossed his fingers and Nora mimicked him.
She felt for Jay. He was a jobbing actor, and as someone who cherished her steady nine-to-five job, she struggled to understand how he coped with the constant auditions and frequent rejections.
Somehow he managed to make a living from it, thanks mainly to voiceover and audiobook work.
‘Sorry about that. Otherwise you’re good, are you?’ she asked.
Jay’s expression became serious. ‘Actually, I had a bit of a shock in the shower this morning.’
‘If this is a gross body thing, then I’m out,’ said Nora.
‘It’s not. I thought I was losing my sight. Everything went all foggy and blurry,’ explained Jay.
‘Are you OK now?’ asked Nora.
‘Yeah, I’d left my glasses on,’ Jay gave his frames a wiggle. ‘What a doughnut I am! It took me a moment to realize but for a second I really thought there was something wrong with my eyes.’
Nora chuckled. ‘I’m glad you’re OK, Jay.’
‘Me too,’ he said, with feeling. ‘How did your date with the bookkeeper go?’ he asked, handing Nora a cup of water from the cooler.
‘About as badly as it could have done.’
‘Not what you ordered?’ he asked, beginning to do some warm-up stretches side by side with Trent, making him look like an Ewok next to Chewbacca.
‘Funnily enough, I did not order a bald forty-year-old who chats to his mother when he’s on a date.’
Jay was making a face. ‘So what now? You could take Miley Cyrus’s advice.’
Nora began to sing ‘I Can Buy Myself Flowers’.
‘Exactly.’
‘Nope. I’ve done that. Turns out flowers are really expensive and the florist had no idea what I was on about when I sang that line.
Uber embarrassing. She just felt sorry for me and added in a few extra blooms and packaged it all up in cellophane.
I left with a hole in my bank account, a pink-bowed arrangement and feeling like a right loser. ’
‘You’re not a loser,’ said Jay, trying to copy Trent’s exaggerated leg stretches.
‘Cheers. But I think I might take myself out of the equation. Stop dating altogether.’
‘Ooh, now don’t be too hasty,’ said Jay, lunging forward and yelping. ‘I think I’ve pulled something.’ His voice was higher-pitched than normal.
‘You OK?’ asked Nora as Jay held his groin.
‘Fine,’ he squeaked. ‘I’ll just get some ice on it. On this. On the muscle. The one I pulled.’ Nora and Trent stared at him. Jay pointed to the refreshments area and walked away as best he could with his thighs clamped tightly together.
‘Ouch,’ said Trent, doing some impressive tuck jumps.
‘You know, Nora, we would make an exquisite couple.’ He gave her a toothpaste smile as he walked to the wall and got his first foothold stable before stepping up.
His arms flexed as he climbed higher. ‘Would you like to go on a date with me, Nora?’
She couldn’t help thinking that she was very much not Trent’s type and he was only being kind.
And while on the face of it Trent was definitely her type with his beefy physique, he was too vain and arrogant for her, plus she wasn’t sure they had anything other than climbing in common. ‘Thanks, I’ll think about it.’
‘What did I miss?’ asked Jay, walking back with a large icepack clutched to the inside of his thigh like he was trying to ride it.
‘Nora has turned down my offer of a date.’ Trent pulled an overly sad face.
‘You asked her out?’ Jay’s head swivelled unnaturally between the two of them. ‘He asked … but you declined. You’re not going out then. Right. Good. Or shame. You know. Whatever.’
‘Actually, I think I’m going to retrospectively apply the 37 per cent rule to my love life.’
She wasn’t sure why that popped into her head at that precise moment but it felt like a plan.