Chapter 38
“How’s your mom doing?” Cassidy asks me as I sit on the uncomfortable couch in our tiny apartment living room. She’s at least kind enough to ask it before my mic is on and the camera is rolling.
“She’ll be okay.” I sip on my coffee. Mom got out of surgery around nine this morning. I stuck around until they moved her back to her room on the floor. The only reason I’m not still at the hospital is because I had to film a talking head about what I’m thinking of as we go into our mandatory separation period before decision day.
Forty-eight hours to clear my head. I don’t know if I should be grateful or full of regret. After my fight with Andie yesterday and a shit night of sleep in a hospital chair, I’m lucky I can sit upright and put my shirt on the right way.
Petra and Dr. Leon join me after their makeup artist is done making them look bright and fresh and awake. Cameras are set up to capture different angles, their cords tangled on the floor at my feet.
The cameras all whir to life, and I’m definitely not ready for this. Petra opens her mouth to speak when the apartment door swings open, crashing against the wall. All heads turn to witness Andie in sweatpants and a T-shirt three sizes too big. She looks like I feel—bags under her eyes, hair askew, like she’s not sure how the hell she got here.
“Kit, listen, I’m sorry I—” She stops abruptly as her eyes bounce around the scene. Who’s here. What we’re doing.
The apartment door squeals closed in the silence. She clears her throat and stands up a little straighter. “Sorry to interrupt. I need to speak with Kit. It’ll just take a minute.”
I look into my coffee cup, a frown pulling on my lips.
“Andie”—Cassidy rests her hands on Andie’s shoulders—“you can’t be here right now.”
“But Kit and I need to—”
Cassidy shakes her head. “Decision day is in forty-eight hours. This is the part of the show where you can’t contact each other until the big day. Kit will stay here and you’ll stay in your loft, yeah?”
She looks at the floor, silent.
“It gives you both time to reflect on your marriage. Alone.”
“I don’t want—” Andie’s voice breaks. A tear falls from the corner of her eye. She hastily wipes it away. “Cassidy, please, I need to talk to him.”
“The show—”
“I don’t give a damn about the show!” Her declaration ricochets off the walls of the entryway. Her shoulders rise and fall with a deep breath. She looks me in the eyes. “This is more important.”
“You’ll have a chance to talk on decision day,” Cassidy says, holding the apartment door open.
Andie looks at me again. “Kit, please.”
I don’t know what else there is to say to each other at this point. She wants me to stay in Atlanta. She knows I can’t. Not if I’m going to take care of my mom the way she needs me to.
Andie said she loves me, but when I asked her point blank about decision day, she couldn’t admit she wanted to stay with me. What’s left to say?
Quietly, I tell her, “You should go.”
The noise that leaves her can only be described as a squeak. Her face is sheet white as Cassidy ushers her into the hallway. My heart sinks to the floorboards, and the air in my lungs comes out in a whoosh.
At Dr. Leon’s questioning look, I say, “We had a bit of a disagreement last night. Time apart might help.”
He nods knowingly. Both he and Petra shift in their seats before getting down to business, asking their probing questions I don’t have answers for.