Chapter 22
TWENTY-TWO
VIX - PRESENT
Classes drag on, and I can’t seem to pay attention to the lecture.
I’d always been a decent student, especially when I was genuinely interested in the subject being taught.
Still, lately, I feel like I’m just coasting along, attending classes out of obligation to stay enrolled, rather than for the purpose of bettering my future.
By the time it’s over, and students are shuffling out the door, I’m tired and ready for a night in.
Kash is waiting for me, leaning against the doorframe with a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.
I smile back, confused as to why he’s meeting me here.
“Did we have plans I’ve forgotten about?”
“You forgot?” he asks, slapping his palm over his heart as if I’ve wounded him. I stare at him, eyes wide, unsure of what I could have forgotten.
“I’m kidding,” he toys with me, and I whack his shoulder.
“I just wanted to see if you want to have a movie night tonight,” he says so nonchalantly. I gaze at him with squinted eyes.
“What’s your game here, Kash Money?” I ask, and he laughs.
“No game, I swear.” He holds his hands up, feigning innocence.
“Aussy has class tonight,” I tell him.
“Yes, he does,” he says, and we stop walking, having reached my door. I look into his eyes, and my stomach flips. The dark blue rings around his irises draw me in. Before I know what I’m doing, I nod my head in agreement to have a movie night with Kash.
“Sure,” I tell him, my voice quiet and unsure of itself. Kash smiles. A smile that lights up his entire face.
“Cool, come by around seven?” he asks, and I nod. Unsure what I just agreed to.
I head inside, not sure what just happened. Leah sits on her bed with her textbooks and study cards scattered about.
“Jeeze, you look like you’ve just seen a ghost,” she says, and I groan. “What’s eating you up?” Sauntering over to my bed, I flop down.
“I think I just agreed to a date with your brother,” I say, half joking, crinkling my nose as I say it out loud.
“You did what now?” she asks, actually wanting me to repeat the words I struggled to get out the first time.
“Aussy has class tonight, which Kash knows, and he wants me to go over for a movie night anyway,” I tell her.
“Uh-huh,” she says, nodding her head, “and you told him where to shove it, right?”
“Lee…” I warn her.
“God, please don’t throw your relationship away with Austin for my brother.” She physically cringes. I shoot a glare in her direction.
“I’m not throwing anything away, Leah. Maybe he just wants to hang out. I mean, we’ve never really hung out alone before or gotten to know each other. He already knows you, and he is Austin’s best friend.”
“Right… Remember, you said all this when you come home later, telling me he put the moves on you.” I roll my eyes, knowing she’s being ridiculous. “If you’re so worried, then why don’t you come with me, and we can all watch a movie together?” I asked her.
“As much as I would love to go watch a movie with my dear old brother. I have an exam I have to study for,” she claims.
“Right…” I throw right back at her, “an exam,” I say in quotations.
Throwing on a pair of yoga pants and Austin’s HHU hoodie, I put my hair up in a messy bun, giving absolutely zero effort in my appearance, in an attempt to prove to Leah that this is, in fact, just a hangout as I would do with her.
“Tell your mystery man I say hello.” I give her a wink and head out the door.
It’s 7:02 and I’m still standing outside of Kash’s door.
I haven’t knocked. I’m tempted to walk away and pretend I forgot we were supposed to hang out.
But that would be awful, right? Why am I so nervous?
Am I making a bigger deal out of this than it needs to be?
Would this make Austin uncomfortable? I inhale a deep breath, hold it for a few moments and exhale, trying to calm my nerves.
Don’t be stupid. It’s just Kash. I tell myself, and the door opens.
“You gonna stand out here all night, Gremlin?” Kash asks.
“What… I—uh… just got here,” I say a little embarrassed. He taps two fingers on the peephole on the door and smiles.
“Would you like to come in?” he asks. Would I? I enter his room, where he has made a makeshift couch on the floor out of pillows and blankets. Spread out in front of it is another blanket with snacks, and my favourite vitamin water.
“This looks… cozy,” I tell him. His smile grows. “I like to be comfortable when I watch movies.” He holds out his hand as if showing me where to go and sit down.
I sit down on a pile of pillows, and Kash sits beside me, grabbing the remote and turning on Netflix. “I thought we could watch The Conjuring. I know you love horror movies.”
“I do,” I tell him, grabbing a peanut M&M and popping it in my mouth. “I also love M&Ms, the vitamin water, sweet and salty popcorn, and licorice nibs, but clearly you knew that too.” I give him a side-eye look, but he shrugs.
“I pay attention, and you have the biggest sweet tooth of anyone I know,” he replies.
“Kash?” My voice softens, suddenly shy. “Why am I here?” He runs his hand through his brown, wavy hair.
“I just thought we could hang out tonight. Is that weird?” he asks.
Yes.
“No, not weird.” I shake my head and lean back into the makeshift couch, pulling a blanket over my lap. Kash pauses for a moment, his mouth slightly ajar as if he wants to say something else, but he doesn’t. He hands me the bowl of M&Ms and sits back.
“Let’s rock ‘n’ roll,” he says, and hits play on the remote.
We’re almost an hour and a half into the movie, and we haven’t said anything to each other since it started.
I can feel him watching me. I pretend like I don’t, but I can feel the intensity of his eyes on my face, and it makes me feel self-conscious.
I look over at him, and he looks away just as quickly.
I pick up the remote and pause the movie.
When I turn back to the screen, his eyes are back, and I try to hide my smile.
It feels like we’re playing a game, and he’s trying like hell not to get caught.
I whip my head towards him and catch his eyes glued to me, and he smiles, his little dimple showing on his left cheek.
“What?” he says with a soft chuckle.
“Why do you keep staring at me? Do I have a bug on my face or something?” I ask him, but he doesn’t answer. He watches me, his eyes dipping to my lips as I call him out. “Kash!” I shout, snapping him out of it. He blinks and shakes his head, snapping himself out of whatever thoughts he was lost in.
“Sorry, no bug on your face, it’s perfect. You’re… perfect,” he says, and I can feel my cheeks turning pink. “Vix, I—I have to tell you something,” he stutters. He looks nervous. Kash is never nervous, which makes me nervous, too. “For a while now, I’ve been feeling—”
“Cocky? Loud? Like your ego might burst through your thick skull?” I tease. The energy in the room shifts, and I’m anxious about the words he’s about to speak out loud. He shakes his head and grabs a handful of popcorn, chucking it directly at me.
“Hey! At least aim for my mouth next time!” I giggle.
“Oh, I’ll aim for your mout—”
The door opens, and Austin walks in, flicking on the lights.
“This is a surprise,” Austin says. “Hey, babe, I didn’t think I’d see you tonight.”
“Yeah… Kash and I are hanging out.”
“I see that,” Aussy says with a slight grin on his face. “Did you want to spend the night? I know you don’t have classes until tomorrow afternoon.”
“No!” I snap. “I think I’ll go home tonight.” I look at Kash and give him a small smile. “This was fun.” He smiles back, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. He seems almost sad that I’ve chosen to leave.
I stand up and stretch from sitting on the pillows for so long, and make my way to Austin.
I give him a light kiss and walk out the door, closing it quickly behind me.
He’s been feeling… what? What was he going to say?
Guilt blankets my heart as I walk back to my room, because even though there was some tension in that room tonight between us, I really did enjoy spending time with him, and I’m sad that it ended so soon. What is wrong with me?