Chapter 16
Chapter Sixteen
Nantucket Island
It was a gorgeous day for sailing. Janie swept through the beach house at nine thirty, knocking on bedroom doors and hollering for everyone to get their swimsuits.
She’d already packed the car with plenty of water, wine for herself and Chloe, snacks like chips and popcorn, fresh fruit, hummus, bread, and cheese.
Like all mothers, she anticipated every need.
The idea was to spend as much time as they could on the “open seas,” to drop anchor in gorgeous locations and swim beneath the cerulean sky.
Miraculously, her kids were faster getting ready than even Chloe. They waited on the front porch, Janie jangling the keys distractedly, until Chloe made her way outside, adjusting her sun hat.
They drove to the harbor, where Janie had rented a sailboat for the day.
The man who owned it was about as rugged-looking as the shark catcher in Jaws, but he had a big-bellied laugh that charmed Janie.
He showed Janie where everything was, checked on her sailing license, and sent them on their way.
“I’m here till eight thirty,” he said with a wink. “Make sure you get it back by then.”
Her kids were impressed as they watched her manipulate the ropes and take them out onto the water.
“I didn’t know you could sail by yourself,” Gwen said, her eyes narrowed. And it was true that Alexander had always been with them when they’d taken the kids out, playacting as the man perpetually in control.
Janie didn’t think before she answered. “Your grandfather Benjamin taught me before he died,” she explained, then cursed herself. She could feel Chloe’s dark eyes on her. But when she turned to apologize quietly, Chloe shook her head and mouthed, “Don’t worry about it.”
Gwen, Conor, and Xander were busy at the bow, their legs strung beneath the iron railing as they sailed.
Janie’s muscles felt quick, alive, and warm.
Chloe helped when she could, presumably because Benjamin had taught her, too.
Janie and Chloe still made a good team, all these years later, transitioning their skills from a restaurant kitchen to the bludgeoning waves.
Eventually, they found a quiet place to drop anchor.
Chloe popped a bottle of champagne and poured their flutes while Gwen grabbed sodas for herself and the boys.
When Janie gave Xander a look, he hurried to help his sister, grabbing snacks for the three of them and even offering them to Chloe and Janie.
Janie had always maintained that boys and girls were needed for all tasks from serving to cooking to cleaning and housecleaning, among others.
She was a feminist. She didn’t want her boys to be helpless.
Seagulls cawed overhead, and the day was dreamy and lazy. Janie was happier than she’d been in months.
With the kids distracted, Janie and Chloe began to talk lazily, drifting from one story to the next. Although they’d spent a great deal of time together since Chloe’s spontaneous appearance in Venice Beach, Janie still had numerous gaps when it came to Chloe’s story and what she’d been up to.
The thing was, Janie had never wanted Alexander to know how close she and Chloe still were.
She knew that Chloe reminded Alexander of his dark past, of a father he didn’t really understand and who’d never fully tried to understand him, of his mother’s pain.
No matter how often she pointed out that Francesca had also cheated on Benjamin (and first!), and no matter how often she said that was a long time ago, Chloe has never really recovered from it either.
Alexander remained pained by the very thought of Chloe.
For this reason, Janie had only had Chloe over to their place in Malibu when Alexander happened to be on one of his business trips.
They’d kept up via phone calls as well. But as Chloe spoke about her past, Janie became increasingly aware that Chloe had lived numerous lives.
She had properties all over the world and had many boyfriends and different, wonderful friends.
Hearing Chloe talk about her past made Janie feel a pang of loss. Back when she’d first met Alexander, Janie had been the one with the wild-eyed dreams. She’d been a vagabond, eager never to live in the same place for long. When she’d met Alexander, she’d thought he was the same.
But growing up had a way of ripping out everything you’d always thought about yourself and filling in the gaps with what you thought you were meant to be. Children did that. Society did that.
Maybe Janie had gotten too tired to remember what she’d wanted from her life.
“I couldn’t have done any of it without you,” Chloe said to Janie now.
“Every time I called, you kept me grounded. You reminded me that someone from my past still cared about me. You were there when I had absolutely nothing. Before we’d met, I’d spent the past ten years or so reeling, brokenhearted, unsure about where I would end up next.
Going back to Nantucket in 1996 was terrifying, but it also fixed everything. ”
Janie furrowed her brow. “How did it fix everything?”
Chloe smiled and sipped her drink. She was acting mysterious. “Benjamin finally admitted how wrong he’d been. He set me up. For life.”
“He didn’t!” Janie’s blood pressure skyrocketed. She remembered the bungalow in Key West, all the travels Chloe had gone on, and all the life she’d squeezed from the past thirty years. It had been possible because Benjamin had given her money. But had she blackmailed him?
Before Janie had a chance to ask, Gwen, Conor, and Xander leaped from the boat and into the turquoise waters. “Mom!” Gwen cried. “Aunt Chloe! Get in here!”
Gwen was on her feet, removing her sundress and performing a swan dive. Was she getting away from Janie’s line of questioning? Or was she feeling the same “carpé diem” she had since Benjamin had taken care of things?
But if Benjamin had given her all this money so many years ago, why was Chloe so set on finding out what had happened to him and where he was now? Janie’s head pounded with questions.
“Mom!” Xander called. “Come on!”
Janie got to her feet and untied her dress, revealing her black one-piece beneath. She took a moment to look at her feet, the toenails of which she’d painted a dark blue last night, watching television with Gwen as the boys played video games upstairs.
Conor joined her children in urging her to dive in. Janie forced a smile and peeked over the edge to see that Chloe had submerged again. She was swimming out away from the boat, her limbs long and slender. Her hair glinted in the sunlight.
Right before Janie made up her mind to dive in, she looked at her phone for a time.
It was a habit, something she did automatically every thirty minutes or so.
Immediately, she wished she hadn’t. Alexander had called her four times in the past hour.
But he’d also texted. Ever since he’d left and she’d moved the kids out of their house, his text messages had been vague, asking where she was, telling her they needed to talk.
But this time, his words were assertive. They ran right through her.
ALEXANDER: Hey. I just got to Nantucket. Staying on Madequecham Beach. I’d really like to see you and the kids. Can we arrange something?
ALEXANDER: There’s so much I don’t understand about this situation. But I’d really like to explain.
ALEXANDER: And I miss you.
Janie nearly dropped her phone.
How did he know they were on Nantucket? She remembered how sure she’d been that he was tracking her, that he knew, somehow, where she was at all times.
Had he tracked her phone? Did he have a private detective stalking them?
Oh, but this was Alexander she was thinking about!
Not some crazy super spy! She bit her nails anxiously, wondering if she needed to take the kids off the island.
But ever since they’d arrived, she hadn’t heard a peep from the airline, nor from the journalists who’d been so sure that Alexander had done something wrong.
What if the story she’d been spun wasn’t true?
Did she really have the strength to let Alexander back in her life?
Before she made up her mind, she heaved herself over the side of the boat and swam under the water, holding her breath for what felt like a full minute before she burst from the surface and gasped. Her children laughed.
Gwen said, “We were worried about you!”
Xander laughed. “We didn’t know you could hold your breath that long!”
Janie’s eyes filled with tears. But here, so close to the water, she knew they couldn’t tell.