3. Bodhi
BODHI
“ F ucking hell. Pull your punches a bit, Bodhi, or I won’t make it out to the defence this year,” Hayden demanded as he copped his second kick to the gut from today’s training session.
Not keen to bend to his demands, I struck again, a right fake followed by an uppercut to the jaw, which he dodged and then returned with a left hook, which just managed to scrape my chin. I grinned wickedly, loving the thrill of competition, even if I hated being part of the city’s defence—my lifetime punishment for ending up here, not that I even remembered how I ended up in this city.
Sweat was pouring down both our faces, evidence of how hard we were working today with the threat of the first thinning of our city’s shield in the coming days.
It was another year where we were desperate to both protect the citizens of the Haven and survive against the Dominants, those disgusting beasts who believed in the subservience of Omegas.
Harsh pain exploded on my chin. “Fuck!” I yelled.
The idiot laughed. “Stop thinking about her and focus!” he teased, and I glared at him.
“I wasn’t even thinking about her this time!”
I came at him harder, with punches and kicks quicker than he was used to as I threw him off balance. He tripped over himself onto the mat, laughing.
“You usually are, though, and that’s the problem. When are you going to do something about it, bro?”
I held out a hand to help him up, which he took, as the others in practice began to move off the floor for a break.
“This is going to be my year,” I said as we walked towards our own water bottles and sweat towels, sitting on the bench for a rest.
“Yeah, well, it better be, because I’ve seen some of the other Alphas eyeing her off,” he commented before pouring a steady stream of water down his throat.
“I’ve already warned them to back the fuck off. If they want to test me, they can go ahead, but they won’t like the outcome.”
Hayden rolled his eyes, dabbing at the sweat on his brow. “You can’t just look at her forever and threaten everyone who wants to pursue her when you won’t act on your feelings. What if she doesn’t want you? What if she has her eye on someone else?”
He waggled his eyebrows, and I growled then, something nasty and possessive waking to life inside me at the thought of it.
I forced a calming breath out.
“Nah, she’ll fall in love with me this year, I know it. Once I make my move, I know she will. You can’t mistake this thing between us as anything other than the real thing,” I added before gulping my own water.
He shrugged his shoulders, unconvinced. “Maybe, maybe not. All I’m saying is, don’t wait, because there are others eager to replace you.”
My jaw clenched. He was beginning to grate on me. “Like I said, this is the year that everything changes.”
He laughed again. “Yeah. For all we know, we could be dead in a week.”
I frowned at that, though I usually laughed, because it was the only way to survive a life sentence of serving in the defence.
I wanted to spend a lifetime with Raya, not a week.
A heavy hand fell on my shoulder with a squeeze, his sweat towel now thrown around his neck.
“See you tomorrow. But go easier on me; I need to be in good shape for the thinning,” he begged.
I tipped my head up in acknowledgement, watching him walk to the steel door that led to the stairwell to ground level. He quickly typed in the code on the side of the door and cast a quick glance back with a wink towards me before allowing the door to slam shut behind him.
I looked around the now-empty room, resolve now firming my decision for the year. I couldn’t stand to think about her with an Alpha who wasn’t me. A laugh escaped me, that nasty feeling inside me twisting. No, definitely not.
This year, I would finally make my move on Raya, make her fall in love with me so I could live out the future I’d been dreaming of.
Tonight would be a good time to start.
N ever in my life have I been short of willpower.
Living in the Haven with a life sentence to serve in the Defence required significant amounts of it already, but having the willpower to survive despite the odds was incomparably different to the sort of willpower required to restrain all my impulses. It was an uncomfortable sort of itch that had only increased in intensity over the last couple of months. Since we kissed. Then, she acted like it never happened.
Lights inside homes began to flicker on, drawing my awareness to the few stray Alphas finishing their day as they made their way home alongside me. The neighbour waved just before the door opened behind him, his lover’s arms opening wide in welcome, both dirtied but happy to see each other as they embraced. A small face peeked out behind the female’s leg, peering at me, and I smiled and waved to their daughter too. She ducked her head away, just as she always did, but still, seeing their bond brought a sense of lightness to my chest.
But with it came a sense of longing.
I walked the last few dusty steps towards the rickety front door, licking my lips ready. I intended to charm Raya and be incredibly convincing this year, not giving her any option to consider another in the Haven. I couldn’t allow it. Even the thought of it made something sharp and deadly rise inside me.
Raya was mine, and I hers.
With a twist of the handle, I pushed the door open and spied her sitting on the floor, a pad of paper on the coffee table and a pencil in hand as she used her few handmade tools to measure and map.
“Oh good! You are just in time for some dinner,” Tia called, and I dumped my small pack down on the floor near the door. I made my way over to the kitchen, shooting Raya a warm smile as I passed. Her gaze drifted over me ever so briefly before flicking across to her mum, a slight pinch to her expression.
Great. Raya was still not happy about Tia trying to help the girls so openly this morning. It was a futile argument, given how stubborn the pair of them are.
Two bowls of steaming rice, some meat, and vegetables were handed to me, which I took gratefully, heading towards Raya to pass her a bowl. I slunk down next to her on the couch as I usually did, and she instinctively shifted further away. It was something she’d been doing since the boundary between us had been breached by that kiss.
My lip twitched in irritation.
I tried not to show her how she had affected me, how desperately I wanted her to stay close to me. So instead, I shoved some of the food into my mouth and chewed slowly, thinking of how I would lead this night where I wanted it to go.
The sounds of pots and pans clanged in the background as my stare fixated on her sketch. Tonight, I saw it as an answer, my lips now lifting into a smirk.
“I want to practice tonight, Ray,” I started, cautiously turning towards her as she paused, her spoon raised halfway to her mouth.
“I was going to paint one of my sketches tonight,” she replied casually before pushing the spoon past her soft lips. I watched as they wrapped around the utensil, rosy and pink. Heat immediately flooded my cheeks, and I quickly turned away before she noticed I’d been staring. Fucking hell, I was just as bad as the other leering, possessive Alphas of this ring.
I ran a hand over the back of my shaved head, the prickle of hair against my skin welcome.
“You can paint. I’ll work on either the back of your leg or back whilst you lie down and work on your art.” Triumph flared inside me as I watched her pause and look around the room in thought. We were friends, after all; good friends, in fact. A couple of months ago, I’d complicated things a little bit when I’d kissed her after I’d stolen some of the alcohol from the compound. When she’d said nothing after it and made no move to continue, I’d just lied and put it down to the fact that I was drunk, which I was. I just wasn’t drunk enough to not know what I was doing, and that had embarrassed me. She’d been trying to escape one-on-one interactions since. It told me it had affected her in some way; good or bad, I didn’t truly know, because I’d never done anything about it again. But I could have sworn that, every so often, I would catch her ogling me, her eyes ablaze with the same need that had consumed me ever since her lips touched mine. Those same damn lips I was now staring at again. Fucking hell.
“Okay,” she replied. “Down here?”
I shook my head, nerves making my stomach gurgle as I tried to process my food. God, why did I eat?
“In my room, if that’s okay. I have better lighting.”
She blinked at me. I was an absolute liar, but I’d fight for this moment she’d been avoiding.
“Sure, I’ll be up soon. I’ll put our plates away.”
I all but shoved my plate at her, taking the stairs swiftly to do a quick clean of my room—as in, shove whatever shit I could into the drawers to hide it and prepare the floor with my doona cover and some pillows for her hips whilst I worked. A smug smile lifted my lips.
Until I remembered I was still in my sweaty training gear and sniffed my armpit just to check, only to recoil immediately. I was now an idiot too.
Her footsteps against the wooden floor alerted me to her incoming presence before she stepped into the room and immediately set up her art pencils and sketch, one of the most intricate designs of our night sky I had seen her draw yet. Whilst she considered her art a hobby, her celestial mapping was good, really damn good, and her style, soft lines showing plenty of movement and depth, was as unique as her.
There was no time to be embarrassed.
I sat quietly beside her, regretting the fact that I did not shower first, but she didn’t comment and immediately got to work. I laid out my own markers, makeshift pens of her design from spare materials at her workplace. The fact that she could make paint and inks meant I could experience the joy of the art I liked, which was designs on the body—all lines, no shading or colour, completely opposite to the way that Raya drew things. I was grateful to her for giving me this. It was the little attentive things like this that spurred me into action and made me think I meant something more than just a friend. It wasn’t like she did things like that for any other Alpha.
I stared at the back of her long legs, noting the curve of her muscles as I envisioned my drawing. What I wanted to draw was the view I had when I could stretch my wings and shift, the view I was only Gifted when our shield thinned to defend the Haven against those who infiltrated us. It was one of the few times I truly felt free and wild. There was no other Alpha shifter in the Outer Ring who could fly and therefore witness that view like I did.
I placed my hand on her inner thigh, gripping her leg and holding it in place as I lowered the marker. A soft smile crept across my face as I watched her toes curl under to steady herself, pausing in her work with an audible exhale. That small smile never left my lips, and it only grew in size when I trailed my hand up her inner thigh, my fingers ever so lightly touching her skin, leaving a trail of goosebumps behind them.
With every stroke of my marker, I watched her between movements, my drawing becoming more detailed, more elaborate, a gift to her that no other had seen before. The grip of my hand turned to soft caresses as I dared to venture further, higher than before, up the soft golden skin of her thigh, her head lifting in response, only for me to stroke and pause, my thumb sweeping just against the crease of her ass cheek as my drawing expanded far beyond what I had intended.
I wanted to touch her everywhere and never stop. But I didn’t, not tonight.
With every sweep, something eased inside of me as my shoulders fell, relaxed, as if the Alpha in me had been soothed through the touch of her skin alone.
By the time I’d looked up again, satisfied with my work, her drawing had barely been touched, and hope flamed more fiercely inside me.
“I’m finished,” I announced, and she immediately moved to stand. “What do you think?”
She turned to the tiny, scratched-up mirror near my dresser and twisted to inspect the back of her leg, her lips slightly parting in what I hoped was a pleasant surprise.
“I love it.” Her fingers reached out to lightly coast over it, and my heart could have burst out of my chest. I truly felt like this was some of my best, most intricate work yet, and hearing that she loved it made me feel proud.
Her opinion was the one I valued most.
She cleared her throat and bent down to pick up her drawings quickly. I hadn’t realised I had been staring at her until that point, and I quickly brushed my hands over my thighs before picking up my markers to put them away. I felt bold right now, powerful, even.
I didn’t want her to leave yet, not when I felt like moments like this meant progress. So, I piped up before she darted from my reach.
“Raya,” I began, but she cut me off.
“I’m going to keep working on this drawing. I want to get it done before the next eclipse,” she blurted before opening the door and hurrying away. For some reason, that made me smile, watching her go. I knew I’d ruffled her feathers. I knew her incredibly well, whether she cared to admit it or not.
What I knew now, without a single doubt, was that Raya would fall in love with me this year. Because if I had nothing else, then at least, I would have her.