Chapter 37 #3
“Oh…” The sting of it shoots straight down my spine before it’s swept away by the hot tangle of his tongue while he swallows every needy, desperate sound I make.
Riggs fucks himself against me, the heat and pressure of it so blinding I feel my entire body stiffen, toes and fingers tingling, a split second before every part of me shatters, pulled apart by wave after wave of unrelenting heat.
“Shit…” Tearing his mouth away from mine on a frustrated groan, I feel Riggs’s shoulders go stiff, his jaw tighten. “Gem…”
“Don’t.” Pulling my hand from between my legs, I shake my head.
“Don’t stop…” Winding my arms around his neck, I tighten the grip of my thighs around his hips until I feel the press of his erection against my bare pussy.
“Come with me, Riggs.” Flexing my hips, I rub myself against him.
I have no idea what I’m saying. I know what I’m doing even less.
All I know is that I don’t want to lose him.
I can’t let him go. Chin tilted in his grip, I press a soft, lingering kiss to the hard clench of his jaw. “Please, come with me…”
“Shit.” This time when he says it, there’s no frustration.
All I hear is defeat. The sort of resignation that will turn into regret when this is over.
Riggs was telling the truth. He’ll hate us both tomorrow.
I was telling the truth too. As long as he’s with me right now, I don’t care about tomorrow.
“Please…” Flexing my hips again, I feel tears of relief prickle against the corners of my lids when he responds.
Pumping his hips against the flex of mine, Riggs adjusts his grip, lifting me even higher while he drops his hand away from my throat to grip the neckline of my tank.
Yanking it down Riggs bares my breast to his mouth on a mindless groan.
Closing his lips around my stiff, aching nipple, he begins to suck, teasing and nipping it with his teeth and tongue, the thrust and fuck of his engorged cock against my swollen clit, dragging me right back to the edge.
Fingers twisted in his hair, I let my knees fall way from his ribcage, opening myself up to him completely while the edge crumbles under a second wave of searing white heat.
He must feel it. The hitch in my chest under the pressure of his mouth.
The way my entire body begins to shake because right before I scream his name, Riggs lifts his hand and covers my mouth for the second time tonight, this time smothering the sounds of another orgasm, moments before he finds his own, the hard, spastic jerk of his erection against my quivering pussy sending aftershocks of desperation and need, pulsing through me.
Pulling away from my breast, Riggs drops his heavy hand away from my mouth, letting its fingers slip around the back of my neck before lifting his head to bury his face in the crook of my neck.
For a few moments, we stay here. Pressed together, my hands relaxing in his hair.
His harsh, uneven breaths cool against my feverish skin.
The rough pad of his thumb skimming along the soft curve of my jaw.
My ankles still locked around his hips, refusing to let him go.
It won’t last. It can’t. Riggs won’t let it.
“Gemma…” He whispers my name, the sound of it telling me it’s already started. The regret. The self-hatred. We don’t have until tomorrow.
“Don’t.” Pulling my hands out of his hair, I drop them to his shoulders and tighten my fingers, trying to push him away from me far enough to show me his face. “Don’t do that. Don’t say you’re sorry.”
Finally lifting his head from the cradle of my neck, Riggs gazes down at me, that sick, terrified look on his face nearly gutting me, but he doesn’t say it.
He doesn’t say anything. Gently setting me back down, I have to force my legs to cooperate.
To unlock themselves from around his hips so I can stand.
Letting his gaze travel the length of me, Riggs’s face pales, seconds before his hands start to scramble to pull the pieces of my ripped tank top back together.
“It’s late.” Trying to tie the broken strap back together, Riggs shakes his head. “You should go inside.”
I don’t want to go inside. I don’t want to go anywhere because I know the further Riggs pushes me away, the deeper he’s going to bury himself.
“No.” Giving him a stubborn head shake, I reach up to push his nervous fingers away from my shoulder.
Tying the knot myself with shaky fingers, I lift my chin and look right at him.
“I don’t want to go inside. I want—” The realization of what just happened slams into me.
What I made happen without thought or worry about the consequences.
Who it might hurt. “Oh my god…” Hand flying to my mouth, I feel my eyes start to bulge. “Cheyenne.”
“Don’t…” When I say the name of his girlfriend, Riggs shakes his head. “Don’t worry about her. We broke up.”
I should feel relieved. I am relieved… but it does little to ease my guilt because I didn’t care. When Riggs was kissing me, telling me how to touch myself, I didn’t think of her. Not once.
Dropping my hand away from my mouth, I let out a slow breath. “Why?”
“It doesn’t matter.” Gaze aimed away from mine, his face folds into a scowl when he shrugs. “We just broke up.”
He’s wrong. It does matter.
“Right before prom?” I look at him like he’s crazy. Like he might be lying. “Who does that?”
“Me. I do,” he barks at me. Shifting his gaze to find mine, he sharpens it to a glare. “Look—I did what you wanted. I gave in. I gave you what you wanted, so just?—”
“What I wanted?” I stare at him, stunned. I shouldn’t be. Riggs warned me. He told me he’d hate me for it and I can hear in his tone that he was telling the truth. I shouldn’t be surprised that he’s finding a way to twist what just happened into something he never wanted.
“I… Jesus Christ…” Jaw set, he takes a step back, away from me, giving me room to move. “For once in your fucking life, quit being stubborn and do what I’m asking. Go inside—please.”
It isn’t the panic I hear in his tone that pushes me away from him. It’s the certainty that if I keep pushing, Riggs will do or say something that will break us both.
I don’t say anything else. I don’t beg or try to bring him back to the place where he’s left me standing, all alone. I just turn away from him and leave, moving through the trees, trying to get as far away from him as I can before I fall apart.