CHAPTER 24 #3
Caroline shifted, her eyes dropping briefly from the window. “You don’t have to worry about protecting me. It’s my responsibility to protect you.”
This house and her staff were her responsibility. She had to keep them fed and safe. She hadn’t done the best job of it lately, but she would fix it.
Lucy placed a hand on her arm, and Caroline tensed for a moment before looking at her maid and her kind eyes as she blinked up at her.
“You take such good care of everyone, but we’re also allowed to care for you. This is our home, and we want to protect both it and you. It’s not all up to you.”
She was at a total loss for words. Part of her desperately wanted to run away from both Lucy’s words and the sentiment.
Her eyes burned because she was so tired.
Tired of being strong for everyone. Carrying all of the burdens so no one else would have to.
This was what she wanted, wasn’t it? To share the burden.
Marrying Edgar was for the good of her family, tenants, and all of the servants, but it was also because she was so tired of carrying everything alone.
“But—,” she started.
“There is no shame in getting help. Especially not when there are so many people begging to help you. Let us.”
Caroline turned back to the window, blinking rapidly to clear her tears. “What if I don’t know how?” Her voice was small because it was so embarrassing to admit that it was easier to do everything on her own.
“You only have to take one step at a time. Start by going to sleep. It’s been so long since you’ve gotten rest. I’ll get someone else to stand watch with me.”
It was so difficult for her to cede control, but she bit her lip. “You’ll wake me up if he’s here.”
“Of course. No one will let him in, but I’ll wake you up, and then we can figure out what to do next. Together.”
She liked that idea, but it was still too difficult for her to vocalize. Instead, she smiled at her maid and left the study. She heard the bell ringing behind her and knew Lucy was enlisting help, but she left before seeing who answered. Lucy could handle it.
Her eyes grew heavy as she walked up the stairs, and she wavered for a moment before entering her bedroom.
She was far more tired than she thought while she stood vigil at the window.
She was too tired to even undress, so she kicked her shoes off and curled up in her bed, wrapping her thick quilt around her, still holding her stake as she fell asleep between blinks.
* * *
Warm rays of sunlight woke her up with a start. Her entire body tensed until she remembered the conversation with Lucy the previous evening. The idea of passing a lazy day in bed was abhorrent, but she felt like Lucy hadn’t woken her up to prove a point.
Her hand hovered over the bell pull by her bed, but she hesitated. If the others had also had a late night, she didn’t want to disturb them either. It wouldn’t be right for her to sleep in and not allow her staff to do the same.
A sharp thought hit her like a punch to the gut: what if the reason why she slept for so long was because The Count had been there and killed everyone in the house, leaving her as the sole survivor to prove a point.
Perhaps it was cowardly, but she feared pulling the bell and no one answering.
She was still debating what to do when her bedroom door opened, and she nearly collapsed in relief when Lucy entered.
“Good morning, Miss,” she said while navigating the room with her silver tray as if it were any other day.
“What happened last night?”
“Nothing.” Lucy smiled at her before returning to setting her table for breakfast. “I had Susie stand with me for the rest of the night, and we didn’t see anything. We even stood there after dawn, just in case, but not a soul passed. Everyone is still on notice, but I feel much better today.”
Caroline walked to her breakfast table, still in yesterday’s clothes. Her head hurt from sleeping with hairpins poking her scalp, but the fact that she slept through it proved her exhaustion.
“If you were up all night, you should still be asleep.”
“I slept for a few hours, but I’ve never been able to sleep late.”
“You still should rest.”
“It’s half past twelve. No one is overworking themselves right now.”
Caroline settled. It certainly explained why her room was so bright, but it was disconcerting that she slept so late without any dreams either. She picked up her spoon and started on her porridge.
“A letter arrived for you. I’ll leave you to your breakfast. I’ll prepare the tub for your bath, just ring the bell once you’re ready,” Lucy said before leaving the room.
The cream colored letter lay beside Caroline’s porridge. The writing was unmistakably Dr. Murnau’s, and she didn’t know why it was so disappointing. There was no chance Valeria would have written. She was the one who stopped writing the first time too. To expect anything else was foolish.
She picked up the envelope and popped the red seal. Anxiety twisted within her at all of the possibilities of what could have happened. The Count was no longer in his cage.