Chapter 27 Genevieve
Genevieve
“Genny, what’s happened, my dear?” My father’s voice is soft and gentle as I look up at him from the floor. “Prince Leland suggested you might need some help.”
My face feels swollen from tears as I sit up straight. “I’m sorry you’re seeing me like this. I’ll be alright in a few moments.”
Father kneels to my level and brushes his gloved hand along my arm. “You don’t need to be alright. Cry if you need to. Tell me what’s hurting you—or don’t. I’ll be here for you because I love you, and I won’t leave when I see you like this.”
He takes a seat on the floor beside me, and I rest my head on his shoulder as I try to stifle my sniffles. He removes a handkerchief from his breast pocket, and I take it, blowing into it in the most unladylike fashion.
After a long silence, I say, “Prince Leland is reconsidering our alliance because of our incompatible gifts.”
My father nods. “Ah. I thought as much when he sought me out. He looked shaken.”
I lean into him, feeling his warmth and remembering what it was like to climb into his lap when I was upset or lonely. He was always attentive when we were children, always there when we needed a parent’s comfort or someone to show us the best hiding places in the palace.
Something changed as we grew older. Mother began to demand more of him, and now he’s entirely devoted to her.
I wonder what their marriage will look like when she passes the crown to me.
Will he be there for me when I need guidance navigating the burdens of ruling, or will he consumed by my mother’s every mood and whim?
“Father, I don’t know what to do. I want this alliance to work. We need it for the kingdom—and I want a husband before my coronation.”
He gives me a sad smile. “Yes, I know, darling. But marriage isn’t something you can force, and some matters are beyond your control. You’ll learn in time that wearing the crown doesn’t mean you can solve every problem. If you try, the weight of it will crush you.”
“Yes, but I cannot fail at this!” My voice comes out harsher than I intend.
“No one will see a mutual decision between you and Prince Leland not to wed as a failure.”
I shake my head. “But I will.”
“Genevieve, you’ve always been your own harshest critic. Take some time to think about what you and Prince Leland discussed. He’s a reasonable fellow, and there’s already that clause. Perhaps Astoria will have him?”
I let out a slow, steadying breath. “You’re right. Of course you are. No wonder Mother relies on you. It’s just… I’d hoped Prince Leland could be my own King Hugo. A man I could depend on to share the burden of the crown—someone who could understand the pressures I’ll face as queen.”
My father takes my chin in his gloved hand. “I do those things because I love your mother dearly. I want to help her as best I can—and that, my dear, is what you need in a husband. Someone devoted to you.”
I turn away and rise to my feet. Kieran’s crooked smile flashes in my mind—not the boy I once knew, but the man who’s returned. The man trying to convince himself he wants to ruin me, yet whose every action shows he’s still devoted.
“I should retire for the evening.”
He stands as well, leading me toward the door. “Would you like me to escort you to your rooms?”
“Yes, Father. Just guide me through the ballroom so no one stops to speak with me. I don’t think I could bear conversation right now.”
He opens the door and leads me into the dimly lit ballroom. Music swells through the room, couples drifting into shadowed alcoves. It’s all so sensual, and I want no part of it.
I see Kieran standing alone against a column. His eyes catch mine, and he bows from across the room, but I turn my head forward and walk resolutely on.
I cannot risk my heart any further until Leland and I reach a mutual decision.