Lady Juliet’s First Kiss
Chapter twenty-one
Lady Juliet’s First Kiss
Oh, no, she would not faint again! Yet Juliet’s head seemed to be spinning, her heart beating so wildly that she could barely draw breath. And then Christopher’s lips touched hers, soft and gentle, and the world suddenly righted itself.
Juliet was unsure what she had expected a kiss to feel like.
It certainly felt odd to be this close to another, to feel Christopher’s body pressed to hers, one of his hands upon the small of her back while the other cupped the back of her head, holding her to him.
It was not merely a touch of his lips to hers, but much more.
She felt his heart beat against her own; she felt the slight tremor that rocked him as she kissed him back.
A kiss seemed a thousand times more complicated than Juliet had ever imagined it to be, and yet it was the simplest thing in the world, was it not?
Slowly, Christopher pushed closer, his hands reaching to cup her face as he brushed his mouth against hers.
Juliet felt herself shiver, her hands curling into his lapels, seeking his warmth.
She knew theirs was not a passionate kiss, but one that whispered of two souls exploring a new facet of who they knew each other to be.
She felt his pulse beat against the tip of her fingers and knew that he felt hers as well as he held her face cradled in his hands.
Juliet leaned closer, the soft pressure of her lips against his tentative. Yet she was curious, wishing she knew how to communicate how much she wanted this.
Gently, Christopher deepened their kiss, and Juliet almost smiled, touched that somehow he had understood her. He held her heart in his hands. He always had but now he finally knew. He was in love with her! Had he not said so?
A part of Juliet was still considering the possibility that she had strayed into a dream, that she was at home in bed or out strolling the grounds, her head lost in this achingly beautiful moment.
A moment that only existed in her mind.
Yet Christopher felt so real. His heart beat strong beneath her hands, and when his arms came around her and he touched the tip of his tongue to hers, every last bit of doubt about whether this was truly happening went out the window. Never could Juliet have imagined a kiss like this.
Never.
Yet it was not enough. It would never be enough. She wanted more than a few stolen kisses. More than friendship. More than passion. More than…love even. She wanted him in her life for all the days to come. Always had he been her friend; only now she also wanted him to be her husband.
Somewhere deep down, Juliet had always known that she wanted him, but she was afraid to admit to herself what it was she wanted.
Perhaps Grandma Edie’s dependence upon her had not truly hindered Juliet’s chances of making a match.
Perhaps, after all, it had been her own doing, knowing full-well that no other man would ever do.
Indeed, the thought of losing Christopher even now was devastating. Yet it was not a thought she could easily push aside. Yes, he loved her but…secrets remained.
Was this moment the beginning of a wonderful life? Or only a heartbreaking farewell?
Knowing they could not remain locked in this moment forever, Juliet pulled back, breaking their kiss. She looked up into his eyes and felt tears gathering in her own. “Will you still leave? Or will you come back with me?”
A shadow crossed over Christopher’s face, proving without a doubt that there were things in his life he had yet to share with her. But would he?
Juliet awaited his answer with bated breath when the sudden sound of hoofbeats made her flinch. Christopher’s head, too, snapped up, and they both turned toward the sound.
“I’m verra sorry to interrupt ye,” Keir said before he cast a cautious look over his shoulder at the horizon, “but the sky has grown dark, and I think we should return to the inn.” He met her eyes, a teasing spark lighting up their pale blue. “Ye’ll not want to be soaked to the skin.”
Juliet nodded, and she heard Christopher clear his throat. “Right,” he mumbled, a faraway look in his eyes, as though he needed a moment to remember the world around them.
Assisting her onto her horse, Christopher then mounted his own. He urged the animal closer to Keir, and for a moment, the two men looked at one another, something silent passing between them that Juliet could not quite grasp. Then Christopher gave a quick nod. “Thank you.”
Keir returned the sentiment before guiding his mount back toward the road. “Quickly,” he called back to them. “Before the heavens break open and drench us all.” A chuckle flew from his lips as Juliet and Christopher hurried to catch up with him.
Fortunately, the inn was not too far away, and they reached its stables just as the first heavy drops began to fall from the sky.
Large clouds lingered above, darkening the sky, as though it were not midday but rather moments before nightfall.
“Hand me the reins and head inside,” Keir instructed in his usual manner.
“See yerselves settled.” His blue eyes met Juliet’s meaningfully before he led their horses away.
Christopher grasped her arm and pulled her along. “Come! Quick!” He held her close, guiding her to the entrance and holding the door open so she could slip inside the warm taproom.
A warm fire burned in the hearth, and delicious smells tickled Juliet’s nose and made her stomach rumble. Christopher quickly procured rooms and then led her upstairs. “Do you wish for a bath?”
Juliet shook her head as he stood in the hall and held open the door to her chamber. “I admit I’m hungry,” she told him with a hesitant look, “but what I want most of all is to speak with you.” She stepped inside, hoping he would follow.
Christopher merely nodded, yet Juliet breathed a sigh of relief when she saw that the look in his eyes spoke of the same need. “I ordered food to be brought to your room, but perhaps we should eat downstairs…so we can talk.”
Juliet hesitated, but then she gestured for him to come in. “We can talk here, can we not? Alone.”
A reluctant expression came to his face as he stood outside her chamber, unwilling to step inside. “I’m not certain we should—”
“I don’t care about my reputation,” Juliet interrupted, feeling oddly reminded of her youngest sister’s fiery temperament.
Indeed, Harry had never cared a fig about what other people thought of her choices.
And the world had yet to end! Besides, Juliet had already risked ruination when she had set out after Christopher with only Keir as her companion.
“But your parents—”
“My parents trust me,” Juliet objected, not the slightest doubt in her mind. “As they trust you.” She smiled at him. “That’s all that matters.”
Christopher gritted his teeth. “Are you certain?” When Juliet nodded, he finally stepped over the threshold and then slowly, hesitantly, closed the door.
For a long moment, they simply looked at one another, uncertain how to begin again. Then Christopher stepped forward, gallantly lifted her cloak off her shoulders and hung it by the fire to dry off. He shrugged out of his own coat and draped it over the backrest of a chair. “Are you cold?”
Juliet shook her head. “No, I’m fine.” She looked at him with expectant eyes. This was it! The moment she had been waiting for for six years. She could only hope it would not break her heart anew.
Holding out a chair for her, Christopher cleared his throat, his face tense.
“Thank you,” Juliet mumbled, seating herself, her eyes following him as he moved to sit across from her. His gaze darted to hers and then away before he closed his eyes and inhaled a deep breath.
Juliet could all but feel the tension in the room. It was as though she could reach out her hand and touch it. What was Christopher so afraid of? What had happened six years ago? Why had he disappeared? Why…Why had he never come back…at least, not truly…until now?
Reaching across the table, Christopher gently took her hands within his own, his brown eyes finally meeting hers.
Rain drummed down on the roof above their heads, and darkness began to fall over the land, wrapping them in a cocoon all their own.
“There is…something I need to tell you. Something I’ve been meaning to tell you…
for so long.” He sighed, his jaw rigid, and Juliet realized how deeply he feared her reaction. He truly loved her, did he not?
“Tell me,” Juliet urged, and she felt as though her heart was about to jump out of her chest as she once more found herself on the precipice between joy and dread.
He loved her! Christopher loved her! And yet…
“Please,” she said gently, their hands clasped together tightly as though they both feared that something might rip them apart. “Is it about Ireland?” He swallowed hard. “About…why you left?”
Slowly, Christopher nodded. “It is a long story, and I should have told it to you long ago.”
Juliet nodded, giving his hands an encouraging squeeze. “Then tell me now.”