Chapter 35
Chapter Thirty-Five
ONYX
My grip on the handle slips, and I grit my teeth. It’s not heavy, exactly. Just awkward. Readjusting my hand, I pull the chest up and lay it flat so Lie can release it. “Got it,” I tell him.
Now that it’s up the stairs and flat on the floor, I can slide it over the rug to where I plan to put it. Lie follows me up and watches as I slide it into place.
The loft in the garage apartment has slanted ceilings, but they don’t come to a peak like you might imagine. They remind me of a barn with two different angles inward until the shallow peak comes together. It means the roof walls slant, but not at a sharp angle.
I can stand without getting a concussion every morning.
But putting furniture against the walls is still awkward because they don’t rest flat.
There’s this gap where the roof wall slants at an inward angle, and the straight ninety-degree angle of furniture is not conducive to the structure.
All that wasted space! And because furniture is made for square rooms and walls, the room gets smaller since nothing is flush.
Not a huge deal, really. This is the first place Cash and I have lived outside of our parents’ homes. Which means we’re not coming with a lifetime of furniture and things. We each have a boatload of little things from childhood, clothes, and whatever, but we’ve had to buy furniture.
The bedroom was most challenging because of the wall-ceiling.
It feels larger than it is because there is height.
We just lose a lot of floor space because of the angles.
We opted to purchase mostly all new furniture, so we have a brand-new bed that has drawers underneath for our clothing.
There’s no closet in the bedroom, so we’ve outfitted the space under the stairs into a closet for our hanging clothes.
It’s worked out well, and I love everything about living here with Cash. Knowing that we share a place and I get to spend every day with him has been… like living on a cloud. My feet never touch the ground.
“What’s going in this?” Lie asks, reminding me that he’s here.
I slide the chest into place against the low wall of the loft and stand up. It’s a little bigger than what I had planned. Then again, with Cash’s growing interest in… things… I have a feeling we’ll fill it easily enough. Nothing wrong with beginning mostly empty and filling it together.
“It’s a toy chest,” I answer.
His grin turns wicked. “No fucking way!”
“It’s your fault,” I tell him, leveling him with a look that I struggle to keep straight-faced. “All those filthy books you’re feeding him.”
As I knew he would, Lie cackles wildly. “You’re welcome.”
Actually, yeah. That’s what I should have said. Thank you for the wild rides. I don’t think Cash and I have ever needed more excitement in our sex life. We weren’t lacking. I think we could take away all the extra now, and our sex life would still be out of this world. We just have that chemistry.
But I’m enjoying experimenting with Cash. I love that he asks for something he reads about and wants to try it with me. Sometimes we fail epically, and sometimes it’s not good, and sometimes it’s absolutely out of this world. The point isn’t the level of pleasure, though. It’s doing it together.
“Actually, yeah. Thanks.”
He grins, and I have a feeling he knows I’m not thanking him for all the dirty content.
Not really. I think he understands from his life with Laiken.
It doesn’t truly matter what we do; it’s doing it together.
Making those memories. They may not be stories we share over dinner, but we love to reminisce about them already.
“You need pointers on what to fill that with?” Lie asks.
“Please don’t be offended, but get out.”
Lie laughs again but turns around and practically skips down the stairs.
I listen for the door to close and then follow him down.
One of the things I’ve learned is that hiding things from Cash in a small space like this isn’t easy.
There just aren’t places to hide shit that isn’t obvious.
Like he wouldn’t see a plastic bag from the toy shop on Anapos under the sink with the dish soap or in the closet next to his sneakers.
Thankfully, my mom didn’t ask any questions when I told her I wanted to store a few bags there for Cash’s birthday.
I stuck them in a tote so she couldn’t see the logo of the shop.
My mom and I are close, and I love her, so I know she wouldn’t judge me.
But honestly, there are some things your parents just don’t need to know about you.
Sex life details seem like one of those things.
I didn’t go wild. Most of the things I picked up are kind of basic and borderline vanilla.
Maybe salted vanilla with a little chocolate swirl, but still vanilla all the same.
Various dildos. A handful of different kinds of wearables.
A single paddle because he’s recently been listening to books with impact play.
A blindfold and a ball gag. Handcuffs, because I feel like that’s a staple in a toy chest, right?
There are even a few lingerie items because… well, maybe those are for me. I saw them and kept coming back, so I grabbed a few different things to try.
Since Cash likes to call me Daddy while we fuck, I’ve also bought him a collar with a tag that reads ‘Daddy’s Little Slut’.
It was the only one that didn’t make me cringe.
He’s not my good boy or baby girl or pet.
I’m pretty confident we don’t live the Daddy lifestyle at all.
Daddy just happens to be an indication of the mood he’s in or a shouted expression of pleasure.
Once I have most of the new toys loaded into the toy chest, I bring one of the lingerie pieces into the bathroom and hide it behind the washcloths under the sink. I have plans for tonight.
As three o’clock comes and goes, my eyes continue to drop to my watch every few minutes. I don’t pick Cash up every day anymore. There’s no need to accept that I love it. However, I’m aware that maybe it can get suffocating having me hovering as much as I do.
This isn’t about trust or even protection now that Benson is gone. I just want to be with Cash all the time. I can’t get enough of his laughter and the way his honey brown eyes sparkle when he smiles. He’s everything. I’ve dreamed of him being mine.
It’s quarter to four when I hear the door open, and my stomach flips with excitement. Finally! My boyfriend is home.
Leaning over the half wall, I look down at him. His eyes rise to mine almost immediately. As if they’re magnets and drawn together with a snap. Cash smiles.
“Hey,” he says as he tucks his earbuds into their case.
My smile feels far too big. Like it’s splitting my face. “Hey. Happy birthday.”
There it is. His eyes seem to glisten as he looks up at me.
“Thanks.”
“Come up here.”
“Are you going to breed me for my birthday?” he asks, almost slyly. Like he knows I can’t resist that request.
He’s right. I can’t. As messy as it is, coming in his ass without a condom is a strange high that I can’t explain. Like I’m branding his very DNA with my seed, making sure every cell in his body knows he’s mine. He belongs to me.
“Yes, but not yet. There are two things I have for you first.”
He sighs. Cash drops his earbuds on the charger and comes upstairs.
He’s still in his shorts and mesh tee that denotes him as a tour guide on the boat.
His body is lean and perfect, even hidden inside an unflattering uniform.
He’s griped on more than one occasion that uniforms should be flattering.
He thinks he looks like an Oompa Loompa.
I think he’s breathtaking, no matter what he wears. Which is why I’m completely hypnotized as I watch him walk up the stairs toward me. Maybe I even lick my lips.
Once he’s within touching distance, I pull him into my chest and hug him. Everything inside me settles because he’s home. Especially when he sighs in contentment and lets his body relax into me.
“Hi, baby,” I murmur. “Welcome home.”
“This is my favorite part of the day,” he says.
“Oh yeah? Not waking up together or going to bed together? Not fucking or sharing meals? Showering together?”
Cash smiles, turning it into my collarbone.
“I love all that. I love that I get to have that every single day. But I think coming home to you is my favorite because you’re my peace, my love, my home, my comfort.
Does that make sense? I haven’t experienced this…
” His voice trails off as he searches for the word he’s looking for.
“I don’t know. Just this in so long, and it’s not just family that I have, but you. ”
I hug him securely for a long time. “It makes sense.”
He picks his head up to look at me. “So give me what you have so you can breed me. I’m so fucking horny, Onyx.” The way he says it is almost a pout. Like I’ve been denying him, and it’s not due to his listening to filth on his way home.
Grinning, I turn him around and show him the chest. Cash stares at it, startled that he walked right by it.
“Open it.”
He does, and then nearly falls over. “Oh my god!”
I laugh at his mortified expression. Because it’s literally three seconds before his horror turns into hunger. “I love everything about this,” he murmurs as he leans over the side. Not touching anything but peering inside as if he’s looking into a pen of puppies.
After he’s looked for several minutes, I guide him to his feet with my fingers under his chin. He stands, and I love that I can see the outline of his erection through his work shorts. Beautiful man.
From the edge of the bed, I grab the collar and show it to him. I have no idea what I’m expecting, but love that it’s excitement followed by heat. He looks up, and I just know he’s waiting for me to put it on him. So I do.
“Fuck,” I say as I take a step back. “That’s hotter than I ever imagined it’d be.”
“Now breed me, Daddy,” he demands.
“Uh… no,” I say, and his expression turns to shock. Confusion. Maybe a little hurt. Leaning in, I kiss his lips. “Honestly, I’m not sure if this next thing is for you or me, but before I breed you, there’s one more thing.”
“You said two.” He points to the open toy box and then to his collar. “Which, I think, this counts as, like, thirty.”
“This is part of the toy box.” I touch the tag. “Just hold on. Also… strip. I’ll be right back.”
“I can totally get behind that,” Cash agrees.
I kiss him once more, then practically run down the stairs. I grabbed one of the lingerie sets at random. It was a subconscious choice. Whichever my fingers touched first.
This might have been a mistake, though. I’m not entirely sure how to wear this. It takes me far longer than it should to figure it out, and based on how loose this one strap is, I don’t think it’s correct. However, as I look in the mirror… I don’t necessarily hate what I see.
I’ve never considered myself feminine. Not for any reason in particular, of course. I just don’t feel feminine. Yet, there’s nothing masculine about the frilly, lacy, skimpy piece of fabric that’s… well, it’s not exactly covering anything. It’s sheer.
Shifting to the side, I look at my bare ass cheeks on display in the thong; the way the straps cross over my back a few times, and the little ruffle at the top of my ass.
Huh. Okay. Let’s go see what Cash thinks.
I pause briefly with my hand on the doorknob as a wave of nerves brushes over me. What if he hates it? I’m feeling weirdly self-conscious all of a sudden.
Internally, I shove the insecurity away and open the door. Cash isn’t waiting over the side of the half wall of our loft. Which means I take measured, careful steps up the stairs to him and focus on my breathing.
We’ve never talked about lingerie. I have no idea if he finds men in lingerie sexy or hilarious. Oh my god, I might be sick!
Cash is lying on our bed when I finally see him.
He’s watching the stairs with his dick in his hand wearing nothing but the collar I just put on him.
I hear the way his breath comes whooshing out of him when he begins to see what I’m wearing.
His hand stops moving on his cock, and his eyes get wide.
I’m careful not to hesitate as I walk up the stairs. I pause at the end of the bed. Cash’s lips parted at some point. After a minute, I make a slow turn so he can see it all. Then silence fills the room.
Cash’s eyes move over my body everywhere. All. Over. Is it my hopeful imagination that I see hunger in his eyes? Is his dick leaking or am I imagining that too?
I forget to inhale when his eyes eventually meet mine. “How did you get hotter?” he asks, voice low and sexy.
“You like it?” I ask.
He looks at me like I’ve grown three heads. “Do I like it?” Cash sits up and scoots to the side of the bed. His hands land on my hips and slowly trail up. Once again, his eyes roam over my body. “Do I like it?” he murmurs again. “Holy fuck, Onyx. I’m going to come right now just looking at you.”
The relief that rushes through me is a little embarrassing.
I dig my fingers into his hair, but he pushes my hand away.
“Oh no. Hands to yourself. It’s my birthday, and I’m going to inspect every single inch of you in this.
” He pinches the end of the ruffles and lifts it to look at my lace-clad cock.
The groan I hear makes me shiver. “Goddamn, Onyx. Your level of sexy is soooo not fair.”
Even though he just swatted my hand away, I push both my hands into his hair and tip his head back so I can kiss him. I’ll give him all the time he needs to touch and look and torture me. But I need to taste him first. He can’t possibly understand how reassured I am that he’s not horrified.