Chapter Twenty
Oh God. It was actually going to happen, Tammy thought as she drove from Porthmellow to the festival site near Perranporth on the Monday before the festival.
Since their ‘restart’ at the Brew House, Tammy had met Ruan for dinner at a pub in Mousehole and they’d messaged and called each other every day in between their various work commitments.
However, that Monday morning he’d gone back to Bristol for a law society conference and was staying with his parents but promised he’d be back for the festival.
The stands were now under construction on the beach, making the event – and her part in it – seem scarily real.
Prior to being selected as a performer, Tammy had viewed with envy the billboards that declared how ‘awesome’ and ‘inspiring’ and ‘spectacular’ it would be.
While waiting at some traffic lights a few miles away, she was even able to read that one of the attractions, admittedly near the bottom of the bill, was: ‘Amazing Sand Art’.
That was her. She was expected to be ‘amazing’.
Her stomach went into a spin cycle.
A horn tooted behind her. The lights had turned green while she’d been fretting.
She drove on, reminding herself that today was only a recce, not the actual day, and that checking out the site would help her feel prepared and calm her nerves.
Over the years, Tammy had watched OceanFest expand from its origins as a surfing festival with a few local bands to a three-day arts and music spectacular.
Its unique setting on the Atlantic coast had made it a firm and lucrative fixture on the calendar, featured in guidebooks and national newspapers.
Although she’d been several times before, it was one thing dancing to the music and enjoying the vibe with her mates and quite another to be at the heart of the performance herself.
With the site looming ahead, she considered turning around and driving home, ready to email the organisers and tell them she couldn’t do the gig after all. Then she heard her dad’s voice telling her not to pass up the opportunity and Ruan’s rational, sensible side saying the same: seize the day.
A man in a hi-vis loomed in the window of her van at the site entrance. ‘Pass, love?’
Tammy scooped up the lanyard that had been sent to her by courier.
He grunted in grudging approval. ‘You’ll need to show that to get access to the performance area,’ he said, waving her towards a parking area packed with vans and low-loader trucks.
From the clifftop car park, the scale of the venue became even clearer.
A large covered stage was under construction, along with two smaller stages and a bank of arena-style seating, presumably for VIPs.
Scores of people were scurrying to and fro, and a tractor was transporting materials across the sand.
Tammy had never worked on Perranporth beach before, let alone in arena-style conditions. Drones, stewards, stages, security … this felt as if she was going to perform at Wembley. Her legs went slightly wobbly at the prospect.
It was as far removed as possible from the comfortingly familiar beaches and secluded coves she was used to, which made it all the more important that she’d shown up today to scope out her canvas.
She knew that the area reserved for her artwork was situated at the far end of the beach away from the performance stages, so there was that at least. The cliff rose above that part of the beach, enabling people to have a bird’s-eye view of her work.
The organisers had assured her that the edge would be barriered off and plenty of stewards would be on hand to make sure no one wandered too close.
They’d also arranged for a drone operator to fly over the design, taking photos and videos as she created it.
Tammy’s friends had occasionally filmed her creations with a drone, but she had yet to invest in her own.
After this event, she’d have to buy one and learn how to use it properly.
She’d also have to be more conscientious about creating content for her Instagram page, something she’d neglected while she’d been so busy helping Davey.
On her way down the road to the café bar above the beach, now the nerve centre of the festival, she had to show her pass twice to uniformed security guards.
You can do this, she kept murmuring to herself, feeling the sand under her feet at last. It’s only sand and the sea.
To her relief, there was almost no one at the far end of the beach where she would do her installation, so she aimed for that, phone and sketchbook in her bag to take pictures and get a feel for the landscape.
She was just passing in front of one of the stands when someone hailed her from a scaffolding platform. The voice was loud and very familiar.
‘Tammy!’
‘Hi, Sean,’ she called back and waved, yet still carried on walking.
‘Hey! Wait!’
Not now, Sean, she pleaded silently.
‘Hold on. I want to speak to you. I’m coming down.’
She had no choice but to stop and wait while he climbed deftly down the ladder from the platform and jogged across the sand towards her. His blond mane was hidden under the yellow hard hat and he was bare-chested under the hi-vis.
‘Hi there. I was hoping to bump into you,’ he said, cheerfully enough. ‘Heard you were on the bill here. About time your talents were recognised.’
‘Thanks,’ Tammy said with a smile of her own.
She was sure Sean genuinely meant his compliment.
She was sure he’d only ever had what he thought were the best intentions towards her.
That was part of the problem. She’d felt stifled in their relationship, cosseted like a fragile heirloom he wanted to keep on display rather than allowing her out into the big wide world.
‘I didn’t know you were working here,’ she said brightly, hoping to keep the conversation neutral.
‘Neither did I. A contractor let the stand builders down, so they were desperate. I was able to pull a few guys off one of my other jobs to lend a hand.’
‘Lucky for them,’ Tammy said, seeing the waves rolling in towards her area of beach.
‘So, it seems to be fate that we’re both here at the same time,’ Sean said. ‘Especially as I wanted to talk to you.’
‘Oh?’ Her skin prickled. ‘Now’s not the best time. I need to scope out the site before the tide comes in.’
Sean followed her pointing finger and smirked. ‘You’ve a good hour yet, as you know full well. There’s plenty of time.’
She fiddled with the lanyard, itching to leave. ‘I can’t have this conversation now. I have to go back and help Davey out in the gallery after I’ve seen the site.’
‘You’re a busy woman. I know that. You were always telling me but, Tammy, I need to say something. I’m worried about you.’
Tammy scoffed. ‘I know you mean well but I’ve no idea why you’re worried. I can look after myself.’
‘Mean well?’ He recoiled with a frown. ‘That’s a funny thing to say about a man who you were going to marry.’
‘I was never going to marry you, Sean,’ she replied. ‘You asked me and I said no.’
He sneered. ‘Wow. That’s harsh.’
‘I didn’t mean it to be harsh. I hated letting you down.’ Her stomach churned as she longed to be on her own again. ‘But it’s kinder to be honest. To both of us.’
He curled his lip. ‘Sure it is. Anyway, I’m not here to dredge up the past. I’ve accepted it’s over between us. It’s now that bothers me, and the future. I want to talk about this new guy.’
Tammy went ice cold and took a second to find her tongue again. ‘What new guy?’ she said, trying to sound as bored as possible while furious inside.
‘The one I’ve seen you with at the Brew House a couple of times. You looked pretty cosy – in fact once you actually jumped on him – so I’m guessing you’re not just mates.’
‘I did not jump on him,’ she shot back, unable to contain her indignation any longer. ‘I’d just found out I’d got the OceanFest gig and I was happy. Not that it’s any of your business, Sean, and I do not appreciate that you’ve been spying on me.’
He folded his arms, a self-satisfied smile on his face. ‘I wasn’t spying on you. It was chance that I happened to see you together.’
Tammy glared at him. ‘Really?’ she said sarcastically.
‘Yes, really, and I’d just hate to see this Ryan hurt you – that is his name, isn’t it?’
‘Ruan. He’s called Ruan,’ Tammy said icily. All pretence that she didn’t care about Sean’s interference had gone out of the window. ‘How do you know his name anyway? Even if you did get it wrong.’
‘Words gets round. Nothing stays secret in Porthmellow for long.’
‘There is no secret,’ Tammy said, ‘so you can wipe the smug smile off your face.’ She was itching to jog off across the beach but she wasn’t sure Sean would go away without having his say.
His eyes darkened in annoyance. ‘I’m not being smug. I’m looking out for a mate, that’s all. Do you have any idea who the bloke is?’
‘Yes, he’s a solicitor,’ she shot back.
Sean couldn’t keep the sneering edge from his tone. ‘A desk man. That figures.’
‘He doesn’t spend all his time behind a desk. He goes kitesurfing and he’s pretty good at it.’
‘Wow. He really has got under your skin,’ Sean said. ‘In every way.’
Tammy waved him away with a dismissive hand. ‘Bye, Sean,’ she said, walking off and refusing to rise to the bait or his insinuation about her private life.
‘Hey, wait!’ He caught her up and grabbed her forearm.
Tammy’s gaze shifted from his grip to his eyes. Her voice became steely. ‘Let go of me. Now.’
‘Sorry,’ he said, removing his hand, but his eyes still glittered with intent. ‘I can’t help caring about you and I don’t want you to end up hurt. You’ve only known him, what, a few weeks? Why is he here in Cornwall? I heard he comes from Bristol.’
‘Jesus, the gossip in this place …’ Tammy huffed in frustration. ‘Yes, he’s from Bristol – along with thousands of other people in Cornwall. Bristol’s hardly an alien planet. Don’t forget your girlfriend moved here from South Africa.’
Sean’s eyes glittered with surprise. ‘She’s not my girlfriend.’
‘Tell that to Rebel. She told Lola she’s hoping to move in with you.’
Sean snorted. ‘No way. You just made that up.’
Actually, thought Tammy, I didn’t. Lola had told her what Rebel had confessed in confidence and now she felt terrible for using another woman’s secret as a barb to wound Sean.
‘It’s only gossip. I could be wrong,’ she said. ‘Don’t have a go at Rebel because of what I said. Now, leave me alone. I’m busy and stressed and all I want is to be able to carry on with my work.’
Sean held up his hands. ‘OK. OK. I won’t hassle you. I only want you to take things slowly with this Ruan until you know him better. Where’s he living? Why has he decided to move here?’
‘His living arrangements are no concern of yours, but if you must know, he lives in a caravan.’
Oh, really …’ Sean snorted. ‘If that’s true, he can’t be doing very well as a solicitor then.’
‘It’s temporary while he looks for something more permanent,’ Tammy said haughtily.
‘If you say so. I’m sure you know best,’ he added with a sneer that implied he thought Tammy knew nothing at all.
Here he was again, she thought, acting as if he was her protector.
‘If I were you,’ Tammy said, mustering up a sarcastic smirk, ‘I’d focus on making sure that scaffolding is secure. We don’t want the stand falling down on your watch, do we?’
‘It won’t. I don’t take risks,’ Sean snapped. ‘Like hooking up with some stranger who’s been around for five minutes.’
‘Oh, grow up. We’re not at school now.’ Shaking her head, Tammy turned her back on him and forged off towards the far section of the beach.
‘Wait!’ he shouted, keeping pace before his hard hat fell off into a shallow pool.
She heard him swear and divert to pick it up, so she took her chance and jogged away from him. She didn’t look back until she reached the water’s edge, and when she did, he was reduced to a figure climbing up a ladder to the platform around the seating.
Tammy’s heart raced with the effort of running and the stress of their confrontation. Despite what she’d told Sean, his barbs had hit home. She was keen to know even more about Ruan and his future plans.
But that wasn’t any of Sean’s business and she absolutely did not need his interference. She’d coped when her mum had left her. She’d coped, somehow, after losing her father. She didn’t need anyone to protect her. She never had and she never would.