11. Lawton
Lawton
Walking away from Talitha last night proved to be a harder task than I thought. I don’t recall ever having a pull that strong to any female other than Adele.
Something about the way her body shook in my arms while she cried had me wanting to kill anybody that had ever hurt her. I wanted so bad to make her feel good last night. I couldn’t and wouldn’t dare take advantage of her in that state.
While she was on her call, I tried so hard not to listen which proved to be impossible. One because she had the damn phone on speaker, and two, because she was loud as hell as she argued back and forth with her family.
I don’t know what it was about her mother that set her off but every time she spoke it seemed like the fire in Talitha incinerated more.
Without me even knowing the history between the two, it was easy to decipher that something had happened while she was in her mother’s care and Gema stepped in and raised her.
If anyone knew what it felt like to have a woman push you out and not fuck with you, it was me. I wouldn’t dare tell her she needed to fix her relationship with her mother.
I wanted so badly for the rest of the family to figure out a way to coexist with Taitha for Gema’s sake. I knew it was a hard enough task having to be someone’s primary caregiver and they wasn’t making the job easier on her.
Had I known she would go through all of this, I wouldn’t have invited her. I could’ve set something up back in Atlanta for us. I brought her here for business, no doubt, but selfishly wanted to be with her out of her element.
I wanted to see her in an environment where she couldn’t run off. The more time I spent with her, the more drawn I was to her. Holding her while she was in her most vulnerable state had me desiring her even more.
I never had a desire for Dahlia. We lasted as long as we did because I enjoyed her company and I loved her. As I reflect on the relationship that we had, I can wholeheartedly say I was never in love with Dah.
I loved the idea of her and the sense of security she provided because I knew she would always be around. Loneliness was my biggest fear outside of abandonment, and Dahlia provided that comfort.
Adele was a different case. I was in love with her. I wanted forever with her and unfortunately, she didn’t share the same sentiments.
Adele reminded me of a love that I never received when I was growing up and I think that’s part of the reason I hold onto her as much as I do.
The gala was later this evening and I had planned for Talitha and I to have breakfast this morning, but I had spent the better part of the day hiding out from her.
I was trying to practice restraint. I thought sleeping it off would bring me down, but I woke up with a hard dick and her face heavily on my mind. She was on my mind to the point where I had to relieve myself in the shower.
I hadn’t heard a peep from her side of the suite so if I had to guess, I was certain she was avoiding me as well. Time was slowly inching by so at some point the avoidance would have to end. That and the fact that I hadn’t ate anything yet.
Grabbing the iPad off the nightstand, I placed an order for brunch. Both of us needed to eat and what time like the present to end this awkwardness.
After receiving confirmation for the order, I hopped out of bed and swaggered into the bathroom to handle my hygiene for the second time today.
Once I was done, I threw my robe on top of my pajamas, slid my feet into my house shoes, and walked out of the room.
The suite was eerily quiet. If it wasn’t for the low hum of the television from behind the closed door, I would’ve assumed I was alone.
“Knock knock.” I tapped on her room door.
“One second,” she called out. It took a few minutes for her to come to the door but when she did, her swollen face did nothing to soothe my aching heart.
Running my finger under her eye, I noted, “Your eyes are puffy.”
“That’s what happens when you cry yourself to sleep,” she joked but the humor didn’t quite reach her eyes.
“You’re killing me, Howard,” I groused.
“I know. I’m emotional as hell, Law. I’ve tried to pull myself out this slump. It’s hard.” She sniveled before backtracking, “But I’ll get there.”
“You want to leave? We can skip the gala and head back to Atlanta if it’ll make you feel better.” All Talitha had to do was say the word and I would have the pilot at the hangar waiting for us.
If going home would make her happy, I would grant her that. Whatever she needed me to do, I would do it for her.
“No,” Talitha sighed. “We didn’t come all this way for nothing.”
“We can figure it out, Talitha. If you think going home will help your mood, we can go. I promise… I won’t be mad.”
“Law, you drug me to New York so you could pimp me out to your rich friends. I wouldn’t dare cut this trip short.” This time when she laughed, her whole face lit up. That simple gesture casually slowed my racing heart.
“Get dressed and meet me out here. I haven’t eaten shit and I know you haven’t either.”
“I’m not hungry, Law.”
“Get dressed. Talitha.”
“You do know that I’m grown.”
Biting down on my bottom lip, my eyes roamed her frame and eventually made their way back up to her face. She was still in the robe that she had on last night. The way it casually fell off her shoulders let me know that she was probably still bare under neath it. “Oh. That I’m well aware of.”
“Get out Lawton Harvey!”
“I’m getting out but if you’re not out by the time the food is delivered, I have no problem dragging out of this room, Talitha.”
“I’m going to call Gema and tell her threatened me.”
“Make sure you tell her I had every reason to do so,” I countered before walking out and closing the door behind me.
A few minutes after I’d exited her room, there were knocks on the door of the suite. I took a few minutes to get myself in check before going to open it. The cart containing the food was pushed into the room and after tipping the attendant, I busied myself setting up the table for us to dine.
Just as I was finishing up, Talitha was sauntering out of the room. The robe hanging off her shoulder earlier was now open displaying the black and pink silk Victoria Secret set of pajamas. On her face was some type of white mask, and if I had to guess it was to help with the puffiness.
“Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes?” I joked with her.
“I’m not in the mood, Law,” she giggled. “I figured I needed to be in pristine condition if you’re planning on pimping me out to your rich friends.”
“You’re going to hold that over my head I see.”
“Oh honey.” Ducking her chin, Talitha batted her eyelashes. “You have no idea how long.”
“Whatever.”
Pouring myself and her a glass of orange juice, I sat at the table and picked up the newspaper that was delivered with the food.
“For it to be a hotel, this food is actually pretty good,” Talitha noted.
Pulling the newspaper down from my face, I looked over at her. She was currently holding up a piece of bacon.
“Surely the bacon isn’t that interesting.”
“It’s not,” she laughed. “It tastes like beef bacon but from the looks of it, I would have to say it’s pork.”
“It’s neither,” I confirmed. “I ordered turkey bacon.”
“You’re fucking with me right.” She frowned.
Grabbing the white mug with the hotel logo stamped on it, I brought it up to my mouth and took a sip of the piping hot coffee. “Maybe.” I shrugged.
“God, you are so facetious.”
“I’ll be anything you want me to be as long as you’re smiling.”
Dropping the bacon on the plate, Talitha slumped her shoulders. “About that…”
“No need. It happened and this is where we are. I don’t want you to feel like you have to be on guard or walk on eggshells around me. You’re human and unbeknownst to the rest of the world, you hurt just like everyone else.”
“I know I do,” she clarified.
“Then don’t act like it’s a crime to show those emotions. You don’t have to be guarded with me, Talitha. You aren’t the only person in the world who has issues that they’re trying to work through.”
“Sure.” She snorted. “I’m sure your issues are vastly different than mine.”
“They might not be the same however, I have issues as well. I’m just good at hiding them.”
“What kind of issues, Law?” she queried. “Because from where I’m sitting, I would love to have rich people problems. At least I could go fuck off some money when I get in moods like this.”
“Money isn’t everything, you know.”
“Says the man who has a lot of it.”
Folding the paper, I placed it on the table and intertwined my fingers. We were back on the money thing and yeah, she may have been joking but it was only so many jokes I was willing to tolerate. “My wealth makes you feel a way?” I asked because she always referred to it.
“No Law, it doesn’t,” she sighed. “It could be intimidating but it doesn’t make me feel a way.”
“Well in case you haven’t noticed, it makes me uncomfortable when you mention it. I’ve worked my ass off to achieve this level of success, Talitha. This is my last time saying it, and I won’t apologize for it.”
“You’re right. I apologize again.”
“Don’t keep apologizing if all you’re going to do is turn around and throw it back up in my face.” Having had enough of this conversation, I pushed my chair back and stood. “The driver will be downstairs at six forty-five. I’ll be in my room if you need me.”
With that I walked away and left her sitting there, stewing in her own pity.
The quickest way to turn me off was throwing what I did and didn’t have up in my face.
Granted, I did have rich people problems and somewhere there was always someone with their hand out, looking for a handout.
But shit, I had issues with my egg donor, as Talitha referred to hers as. I had a traumatic past as well.
Unlike her, I chose to not deal with it as a way of escaping it. The longer my mother went unconfronted, the more the issue didn’t bother me. It’s the reason I never entertained Sincere when he brought her up in a conversation.