23. Silas
CHAPTER 23
Silas
P ounding on the door rouses me from my sleep. I groan as I glance at the clock and see it’s not even nine in the morning. Fuck. I get to my feet wondering what asshole is trying to beat down the fucking door. Who the hell is here?
I pull the door open and glare at the prick that’s been knocking. But my glare turns to confusion when I see Jack standing at my door. “Get dressed,” he tells me, his body locked tight.
“What’s going on?” I demand. My gut is screaming at me, that something fucking bad is coming.
He sighs. “Get dressed, we’re going somewhere. Don’t ask questions.”
I narrow my eyes, but turn on my heel and stalk toward my bedroom. I grab my jeans and pull them on, followed by my shoes and socks. Then I grab an old tee that’s lying on the floor and throw it on.
“Let’s go,” he tells me as he heads toward the stairs.
I dutifully follow behind him until we get outside, but I’m getting annoyed that I’m being left in the dark. He climbs into his car, not once looking back at me. Fuck it. I climb into the passenger's side. Where the hell are we going?
“Jack, what the hell is going on?” I demand when he pulls out of the parking lot.
“Trust me,” is all he says.
I fucking do trust him, but right now, I’ve no fucking idea what to think. That feeling in my gut intensifies. He turns up at my apartment and demands that I come with him. Something’s not right.
He talks about the game last night, and I let him, right now, the small talk is infuriating me. I bite my tongue and wait it out.
Fifteen minutes later and he’s pulling up outside a house. I frown, wondering where the hell we are.
He shuts off the engine and turns to look at me. His face serious, and his eyes full of worry. Fuck, what the hell is going on?
"This is your chance," he begins, "this is your make or break. I don't know the ins and outs, Ali never did say, but from what I have gathered, she's broken Si."
My brows knit together as I try to decipher his words. "What?"
“If you’re lucky, you’ll be able to get everything you’ve ever wanted.” He tells me, and I’m getting pissed with his cryptic shit. “Hurt her, and you’re going to have a lot of angry people after you. My sister Ali fucking loves her.”
“Stop talking in riddles,” I yell, my anger finally coming to the forefront.
He smirks and it just angers me further. But his next words have that anger dissipating. “Payton.”
Everything he’s just said comes flooding back, and the one thing that stands out has my heart clenching. “She’s broken?”
He nods, giving me a sad smile. “Yeah, man. Just don’t hurt her. I don’t want to have to go against my sisters to save your ass.”
His sister Ali isn’t a blood sister, but that doesn’t matter. The Cassly’s practically adopted her and she’s been a member of their family ever since. They all love her as though she’s blood family. Ali’s best friend is Jack's biological sister Carey, and Tanya. Jack’s wife is their friend too, since college.
“Ali knows Pay?” How the hell do they know each other?
Jack chuckles, “Yeah, go talk to your girl and sort this out. There’s a lot you’re about to find out. Your answers are behind that door.”
“What?” I’m fucking shocked, I’m rooted to the spot.
“I got a call from Ali this morning. She’s worried about Payton. She asked me to bring you here. She needs you, Si. Payton needs you.”
His words spur me into action, I push open the car door. “Thanks, man.” I slide out of the car, and my feet are moving toward the house. I hear his car reversing as I knock on the door.
It’s as though an eternity passes as I wait for the door to open. Why is she broken? What happened to her? I have some many dark thoughts running through my mind. But when it does, every thought leaves my mind. All that I see is the beautiful woman that I love so fucking much.
The pictures I’ve seen haven’t captured the depth of her despair. The pain in her eyes tears at my fucking soul. The weight she’s lost is even more noticeable than I thought. Her collar bone is protruding from her oversized sweater. She looks so fucking broken, and I hate it.
“Si…” she whispers, and I can’t bear the fucking pain in her voice. She licks her lips and glances around. “What are you doing here?” Her voice is tiny, much like how she looks right now.
“What’s going on, baby?” I ask as I move towards her, unable to keep my hands off of her any longer. I pull her into my arms, and instantly my body relaxes.
My t-shirt is instantly soaked, and I glance down to see tears streaming from her eyes. “Baby?”
It’s as though a dam has burst, her body wracks as a sob breaks through. Her entire body shakes in my arms. I sweep her up into my arms, hating just how fucking light she is. She shouldn’t be this small. Fuck. What’s happened? Has someone hurt her?
I kick the door closed behind me as I move into her house. She clings to my body as though she’s afraid to let go. I walk toward the sofa, not once glancing around her home, I’m too concerned about what’s going through her head.
“Baby?” I ask once I’m seated. She’s tucked up in my lap, her hands gripping my t-shirt as she continues to sob.
“I didn’t want to tell you over the phone,” she says through her sobs, and I tense beneath her. Tell me what? “But it’s too late now.” Her voice the softest I’ve ever heard, and yet filled with so much despair.
“What happened, baby, tell me,” I beg, trying my hardest to keep the anger out of my voice. I hate that she’s hurting, but right now, I need to know what the fuck has happened.
She’s silent for a moment as she composes herself. When she climbs off my lap and moves to the other side of the room, I instantly miss her, yet I’m put on edge. I hate that there’s fucking secrets between us. The fact that she’s been here in Seattle for more than a day and hasn't told me pisses me off. Why did she keep it from me?
“You’re going to hate me,” she whispers, and I feel as though I’ve been punched in the gut. Why the fuck would I hate her?
“Payton?” There’s a tinge of anger in my voice.
“I wanted to tell you when I saw you.” She’s said that before. “Christmas day was the happiest day of my life.”
I nod, wondering where the hell this is going,
“I finally had you back, and then I got the best news. I found out I was pregnant.” Her voice is a soft whisper, I just about hear her.
“Pregnant?” Fuck, what the hell happened to my voice?
She nods, “Yeah, I was so excited. I couldn’t wait to tell you.”
“You didn’t tell me?” She’s got to be at least three months pregnant. There’s no anger in my voice, I’m merely curious.
“I didn’t want to tell you over the phone. I wanted to tell you in person. I thought you deserved that much.” She gives me a weak smile, but there’s worry in her eyes, and I’m not sure why.
I actually would have been pissed had she told me over the phone. I’m glad she waited. “We’re having a baby?” Excitement bubbles up inside, fuck, I’m going to be a dad. I stand up and go to move toward her, but I stop when I see her face.
Tears slowly fall down her face, and she shakes her head. “No.” Her tongue swipes across her bottom lip.
My heart fucking stops. What the actual fuck?
“Silas, I went for my scan two weeks ago,” her body begins to shake, “there was no heartbeat. The baby died.”
She falls to her knees as painful sobs wrack through her body.
Our baby died.
I swallow past the lump in my throat as pain like no other erupts in my chest.
Our baby died.
Fuck.
Her words reverberate around my mind.
I breathe through the hot tears that fall from my eyes.
I’ve never felt as fucking helpless as I do in this moment.
My girl is in a heap on the floor as she sobs, the pain of losing our baby pouring out of her. I’m lost in the turmoil of picking her up and comforting her or crawling beside her and doing the same.
I never knew about the baby, and yet it hurts so fucking much.
She should have told me. I would have been here for her. She shouldn’t have gone through this alone.
Why didn’t she tell me?