Chapter 20
ESSENCE
“Ooooh, that’s definitely the one!” I told Bliss as she posed in the sequined gown.
We were out shopping for the charity event and neither Santana nor Valentino had spared any expenses.
My own Valentino gown was already being wrapped up along with the matching shoes because I was much less nitpicky than my sister and had fallen in love with my dress right away.
I thought it was cute that I’d be wearing Valentino’s name down to the shoes, and I couldn’t wait until he saw me in it.
“Yeah, I like that one too, Bliss, but I think the red would be more fire. Didn’t he tell you to show out?
” Micah said, and I shot her ass an evil look.
Fucking with her we’d be there for another hour waiting on Bliss, and my stomach was currently in my damn back.
I was so hangry I was ready to toss a whole box of shoes at her head, but I wasn’t trying to pay for anything more than I had to; I didn’t give a damn how much Valentino told me I could spend.
Frowning, she lifted her shoulders up to her ears and mouthed what while I bucked my eyes towards Bliss, who was already second guessing the dress now.
“You think so? I like the red, but I’m not tryna be looking like Jessica Rabbit the first time I meet his mama.
” She groaned, turning from side to side.
“Bliss, I swear to God, if you don’t come on, I’m gon’ knock all this shit over!” And I meant that. My stomach growled loudly, and their eyes shot to me.
“Ewww hangry much hoe?” Bliss’ nose turned up and she pointed at her bag.
“I got a granola bar from earlier in my bag you better eat cause I’m not leaving until I find a dress that’s gonna wow Santana.
” My jaw dropped at her even insulting me with the offer of a damn granola bar and it probably wasn’t even the good Nutri Grain ones.
“How long that shit been in the bottom of your bag while you offering it to me?” I muttered even as I reached for her purse.
“I said it was from earlier heffa don’t do me.” Bliss rolled her eyes and disappeared back behind the dressing room door.
“I’m hungry too! Give me a piece!” Micah held her hand out as soon as I produced the granola bar and I just handed it over.
There was no way, that little shit was going to do anything for either one of us and definitely not us both.
She didn’t hesitate to rip it open as I sat back and waited for my sister to emerge.
My phone dinged with a text from Dee, and I cocked my head.
Of all the women in our friend group, I had been cutting her the most slack because she was still newly married and getting into the feel of things.
That didn’t mean I wasn’t still side eying her ass though.
Even when I’d gone out of my way to check in with her she’d been incredibly short, so to see her on my line threw me for a loop.
Before I could read it, though, another text came through from Valentino, and I opened that first.
Baby: Wyd
Me: waiting on Bliss to pick a dress wyd
Baby: waiting on you to come feed me, a nigga starving
My neck grew hot and I squirmed in my seat.
I’d already been obsessed with Valentino but pregnancy had me ready to pussy pop from just a look from him.
He was just as bad and had been feeding into my whims without even knowing his baby had my hormones on twenty.
I was still unsure of what I even wanted to do so I was keeping the news to myself but it was getting harder and harder to hide my morning sickness when we stayed with each other.
I planned to make my decision after I met his parents at the charity.
As good as things were I wanted to make sure I even got along with his family before making such a life changing decision.
Not telling anyone was going to make it easier if I did terminate though.
Then I wouldn’t have the feelings of guilt or judgement being placed on me.
“Okay, I think I am gonna go with the red.” Bliss came out smoothing down the sides of her dress and I had to admit it was gorgeous on her. The deep red suited her light complexion and the material fit her like a glove.
“Told you.” Micah noted still chewing, while I nodded in agreement.
“Yeah definitely the red.”
Bliss stopped running her hands down her body to turn to me with her eyes narrowed. “You just said the black one was the one. Make up your mind!”
“You make up your damn mind! I’m not bouta play with you Bliss, both dresses look great on you pick one before I call Santana to pick it.” I threatened and she gasped like I said something crazy.
“Don’t do no shit like that! I’ll wear the red.
” She rushed to say and dramatically took her ass back in the dressing room.
Rolling my eyes, I looked over at Micah’s unhelpful ass to find her nose buried in her phone, smiling as her fingers flew across the screen.
I already knew she wasn’t talking to Travis’ goofy ass since she finally broken up with him but I hadn’t heard about any new niggas being around.
I was being so nosy, I’d forgotten all about the message Valentino had sent as I leaned over obnoxiously. The way she quickly pulled her phone to her chest had me grinning as I nudged her. “Uh uh who is that?” I asked making her try to fight the smile on her face.
“Nobody, just Quick. I been checking on him and making sure he’s doing his exercises.” She downplayed it but I saw right through that shit, twisting my lips doubtfully.
“I ain’t never seen you that damn happy about therapy exercises, hoe. Try again.”
Rolling her eyes playfully, she let out a sigh. “We talk about some other stuff too, but it is mostly therapy since he refuses to go to anybody else.” She tried not to let it show that it flattered her. “I can’t in good conscience let that man go without physical therapy in his condition.”
“In good conscience, huh?” I teased just as Bliss finally came out in her street clothes, and I shouted excitedly.
“Girl, it was never that serious.” Bliss walked off to the register, and I was right on her heels. I was more than ready to get out of here so I could go eat and then go home to get ate!
A couple of days later I was at work trying hard to fight off the sudden wave of nausea that had hit me when one of the mothers came in. Whatever perfume she was wearing didn’t agree with my baby, and not only that, but I’d asked her not to wear shit like that up here.
“Ms. Kane, you know you’re not supposed to wear perfume if you know you’re visiting.” My face contorted as I tried to keep from gagging. I didn’t know what kind it was, but it had my stomach turning. The woman looked at me like I said she smelled like shit and quickly copped an attitude.
“I don’t got nothin’ on, though.” I studied her for a second and noted the look in her eyes but shook off my thoughts.
Ms. Kane wasn’t up there nearly as often as she should be for a mother with their baby in the NICU, and I thought maybe it was because she didn’t want to see her son Kelson that way.
I’d experienced that before and was trying to show grace, especially since her son was getting better every day.
Honestly, I was happy for her to see his progress, thinking maybe it would fix her nasty tone.
“Babe, you got something on ’cause I can smell it, and you’re barely in the room.
You’re gonna have to go get cleaned up and change your shirt before I can let you in.
If you want we can at least give you a gown but if you’re planning on doing skin to skin, you’ll need to wash as much of your upper body as you can.
” I was real life proud of myself for keeping it together, but I could literally taste the bile rising in my throat.
She shook her head and let out a bitter chuckle.
“If you think you’re gonna keep me from seeing my baby you’re out your mind.
” She shifted her body like she wanted to fight and I realized I was going to have to stop being so nice about it.
Most of the time, I never had to explain the rules more than once to the mothers with NICU babies.
They wanted to see and hold their baby’s so bad they did whatever was required of them with no arguments.
There was always one or two that wanted to act up though.
I resisted the urge to roll my eyes just as my supervisor came in.
“What's going on?” Samantha wanted to know, looking between the two of us with piercing blue eyes.
“I’m just here to visit, and she’s telling me I can’t, which is crazy as hell because y’all know me. I shouldn’t have to get permission and go through all this just to see my baby.”
The smug look on her face as she called herself snitching had me more than a little annoyed, but my first and main priority was creating a safe space for our sensitive babies.
I didn’t have time to be going back and forth when we both knew I had a degree that said I could tell her whatever when it came to the health of her baby when he was in our care.
Instead of going through a long explanation, I simply folded my arms and said.
“She’s wearing perfume. I just let her know in order to come into the nursery she needs to wash it off and change into a gown.”
“Girl, I had on some earlier but-.”
“Ms. Kane, it doesn’t matter how long ago it was.
You’ll need to freshen up to come into the nursery.
If you’ll come with me I’ll help you with that.
” Samantha swept her arm toward the offices, and the woman sucked her teeth but headed in that direction.
“Thank you, Essence, you can go ahead and finish your rounds.” Samantha basically dismissed me before following the woman and I went the opposite way.
It was feeding time anyway and I needed to make sure my babies were good before it was time for me to go.