Chapter Nineteen #2
That admission made me want to kiss her. But this moment between us was fragile. Not to mention she’d asked for space.
Instead, I nodded slowly. “Thank you so much for telling me that. I appreciate it.”
For a moment, I just looked at her, as I still leaned on the speaker with one arm. Her pale hand came up and made contact with the center of my chest as she pushed me backwards.
“Back off, will you?” she told me, voice not angry.
I took a step back, but more out of respect than the actual force. She’d only pushed me lightly. Though she was capable of more. Saoirse was quite strong and fast.
“Sorry.” Not entirely sorry. “I meant what I said. You’re an amazing person and will make someone very happy one day. You have the right to be happy. I will still eviscerate someone in song for you.”
Who had hurt her? Probably an ex. There was always some asshole alpha ex. Or perhaps an overbearing alpha relative.
Or both.
Her blue eyes seared me. “Thank you for your song. That was the best apology I’ve ever received, even though, as I said, you have no reason to apologize. My reaction was the one that was out of line. I’ll do better, too.”
“That’s all we can do, right? Try to be the best we can be?” I gave her a hopeful look, glad she didn’t actually think I was worthless.
Her look went thoughtful. “Indeed.”
For a moment, the silence hung between us, heavy and thick, a little uncertain, a little hopeful. That knot in my chest, the one that was there at the thought of hurting her, of pushing her, unraveled. I was glad things were good between us once again.
Well, yes I wished it could be more, but I’d be all right with just being friends.
“Well, this looks cozy.” Carlos came over to us, Fiona and Hale in tow.
Even though the club was full of smells, I could tell that they reeked of each other and alcohol, and I wondered what happened when they seemed to have disappeared.
Not that it was any of my business.
“There you are.” Fiona launched herself into Saoirse’s arms.
“I’m right here. We were just talking.” Saoirse held Fiona to her.
“Good.” Fiona smiled at her.
Her lips pressed to her head. “What have you gotten up to?”
Fiona smirked. “All sorts of things.”
“That song you did was amazing.” Carlos clapped me on the shoulder.
“Thanks, man. Do you want to come onstage with me tonight? You don’t have to.” My song Guacamole paired well with the Cookie Song from Monstruo Lane. Sometimes we performed it together.
“I’d love that. Hey, there’s a set I want to catch tonight,” Carlos added.
“I want to see a few things, too,” I agreed. “We have three days to explore, but there’s some cool shit.”
Saoirse nodded. “There is.”
“I need to catch at least part of the Manic Dream Pixies tomorrow and send the video to my sister,” Hale said. “Maybe get her some merch.”
Fiona squealed. “I love them.”
“Never heard of them. Let’s do it.” One thing I loved about festivals was finding my new favorite bands. I never knew who I’d run into that would be great for a future collaboration.
“I’m still hungry,” Fiona stated. “Can we go to the festival and find the food trucks, or at least go have something to eat someplace. Please?”
“Oh, I have cheesy crackers to tide you over.” Hale unzipped his belt pack and got out some tiny packets of crackers, shaped like ducks.
Carlos eyed him. “You have snacks in your belt pack?”
“Well, yeah? I have the important stuff. Condoms, drugs, snacks, band-aids, pain relievers, sunscreen, energy shots, and hydration gels. I have little siblings, I know how to be prepared for an outing.” Hale looked proud of himself.
“I love these, thanks.” Fiona took a pack and kissed him.
“Being prepared is good,” I assured. That was pretty clever. Kace usually had something similar for shows. Though I was hoping Hale wasn’t packing condoms and drugs for trips to the zoo.
Though I could see drugs being fun at art museums.
“Food trucks at the festival are free for us, right?” Hale asked. “I vote for free food.”
“Sounds good to me.” My belly agreed. “Let me get my coat and we’ll head up to the festival and see what we can find.”
Kace hadn’t managed to track down a taco truck, but I’m sure we could find something.
The energy around us at the festival was electric. The elaborate decor I’d seen during my sound check now came alive with lights and movement, making us feel like we were indeed in some sort of candy cane wonderland.
It was probably amazing while high.
The decor wasn’t just on the stage, but around us, including suspended over the crowd on various long poles that were part of an elaborate system to cover us in the event of snow.
Right now, the weather was cold and crisp, but not freezing. Of course, that was mostly due to the sheer number of bodies and the strategically placed heat lamps.
Music played from the stage as we danced in the VIP section. Hale and Fiona were quite drunk. Carlos was feeling good, but he also knew his limits in public. After all, he had a reputation to maintain. Saoirse, well, I think she was having fun?
Vigo The Space DJ took the stage in his crazy alien mask, as smoke and lasers swirled around him. A giant spaceship with a wreath on it joined the holiday decor.
He always put on a good show, mixing popular songs with warehouse beats, creating some of his own, even working with artists who did sing. I admired his work. He’s been around for a long time.
In fact, I’d seen him years ago at the very party that made me realize what kind of sounds I wanted to experiment with.
Kace and Tyrell joined us. As Vigo played, the lights danced, and the decor moved, along with fog and lasers. This festival wasn’t just about the music–it was an entire experience.
Finally, Kace checked his phone and nodded. It was time.
“I’ll see you up there.” I waved to everyone.
Following Tyrell and Kace out of the VIP area, we went through the musician’s entrance.
He led me to the small dressing room set aside for me to prepare and relax.
Drinking some more water, I allowed Tyrell to fuss over my hair and my outfit.
I changed into the sexy Santa outfit I’d worn for the parade yesterday, and a blinking Santa hat.
In the corner was the giant stuffed snowman, along with a Santa sack filled with baguettes, tiny boxes of cereal, and wrapped presents, which were T-shirts and holiday boxers from my company.
Kace beamed. “It’s good, right?”
“They’re going to love it.” I looked at Tyrell as he continued to mess with my hair. “My hair is fine. I’m wearing a Santa hat anyway.”
Tyrell took a step back to inspect his work. “I suppose.”
Bailey and I did a little video, as Kace checked on last minute details and made sure the inflatable dicks were cued up and ready to go.
We also had the T-shirt cannons and a few people to help us with them while wearing inflatable snowman costumes.
I’d gotten the idea when I’d played at a big state fair and there was this country music band that had someone in an inflatable dinosaur costume, shooting T-shirts at the crowd.
I went through my usual warm-ups and got prepared. I could still hear Vigo’s set as it wound down. There would be a quick break in between to set everything up.
“Are you and Saoirse better now? Is she coming up on stage?” Kace pre-opened the large boxes of cereal to make it easier for me to pour them on the crowd.
“I think we’re good, but she’s not coming up. It’s not her thing. But Carlos is going to come up when I do Guacamole, so that he can sing the Cookie Song.” I sent a couple of texts, but the reception was spotty here.
Tyrell nodded. “I have chips, but no cookies. Is that okay?”
“It’s fine.”
The stage manager popped her head in. “Ready?”
I popped up out of my chair. “I was born ready.”
We went to the wings of the stage, where they were switching things out.
My road crew set up my equipment at the front of the stage in record speed.
My background, themed for my newest album, was dragged out along with the giant stuffed snowman.
The boxes of cereal were placed nearby, along with some water and other things we’d need.
While we did that, I put on the usual face mic I wore, so that I could have both hands free.
Finally, the lights that had come on during the changeover lowered. I pressed the button on my phone, which let me control my equipment remotely, cuing up the intro I’d made for tonight. The song of bells jingling filled the air, then went right into Small Dick Energy.
“There’s nothing wrong with bringing that small dick energy. Sometimes the party needs that synergy,” I rapped as I grabbed the Santa sack, throwing out things from my bag to the crowd as I did a lap around the stage. In Lovely Fucker-Land, Small Dick Energy could be a good thing.
Taking my place with my equipment, I left the sack next to it, a few things spilling out onto the stage.
“Merry Christmas, my Lovely Fuckers, are you ready to party?” I asked as the song ended.
Given it was Christmas Eve there were a few festive outfits, including blinking reindeer antlers, and Santa hats.
“I can’t hear you. Technically it’s Christmas morning. Come on! Do you need some presents?” Starting an instrumental version of Jingle Balls, I grabbed the bag and threw some things at the crowd, enjoying the interaction.
Crowd sufficiently hyped, I launched into my medley of Jingle Balls and Fuckboy Santa.
Noticing how the crowd was vibing with the holiday tunes, I continued the theme, by mixing Christmas songs with Eat More Pussy and Cocksucker. I kept throwing out more presents, baguettes, and cereal.
As one does.
I moved onto my next song, dancing around and pouring cereal directly on the crowd. Catching Carlos’ eye, I motioned for him to get closer to the stage.
When the song finished, I talked to the crowd like I usually do, thanking everyone for coming out, for being into my music.