Chapter 23
Chapter Twenty-Three
Vivian
The next morning, I’m tired. We didn’t get much sleep. We went several rounds, and now I’m addicted to Jonah’s body. The command in his voice. The way he pulled me in close and held me all night.
But the family vacation must go on. I just hope like hell they don’t figure out their “sons” aren’t acting very brotherly together.
We pile into the van and head to the railroad museum.
The museum has a large area with everything from steam locomotives to vintage cars to old weapons. There’s even, for some reason, a dinosaur display. Maisy and Jonah are excited about that. And it’s cute. He’s such a golden retriever.
I usually love going to museums, but not today. My focus is gone. When I’m not staring at Jonah, I’m replaying our night together. He was so eager to learn everything.
But this gets me in trouble more than once. The others are ahead of me, checking out the model train city. I’ve dropped behind—again—but this time, I’m not alone.
“What’s this about?” Mom asks, gesturing toward my face. The look in her eyes tells me this isn’t about my injury.
But I deliberately misinterpret her words. “We talked about this. A guy at the bar knocked me into a table.” I pat her arm. “Getting old sucks.”
She glares, and it’s so familiar that I almost cry with relief. “That’s not what I meant, and you know it. Who’s the guy?”
Panic flares in my chest, and now I want her to be clueless again. But that thought leaves a giant pit in my stomach.
No sense in denying it. “Just a guy. It’s fun. That’s all. Nothing serious.”
We walk by an old wagon from the 1800s, and I pretend to be interested.
“I miss us talking about things.”
I laugh. “We don’t talk about things, Mom. You ask. I deny. You make up some story in your head about how I’ve fallen deeply in love. Just like you and George.”
And then I try to convince myself that this is like all those other times. Except, how can it be? I’m risking my relationship with my mom and my stepfather.
What happens when we get to San Diego? If I get this job and move in with Frankie, where will that leave Jonah and me? I never saw him much before. Add a thousand miles to that, and it seems impossible.
That’s not even the biggest hurdle we’d have to get through. Jonah and I can never be together unless we tell our family. And that will never happen.
Which is why this thing between us is casual. Except it doesn’t feel casual.
And if Jonah realizes I haven’t told him everything, will he still even want me?
The smart thing to do would be to call it off. But I can’t do that. If I can only have this time with Jonah, I’m going to enjoy every minute.
Mom nudges my arm and smiles. “I’m ready to listen anytime you want to talk.”
“Thanks, Mom.” I appreciate her offer. I really do. But there is no way in hell I’m talking to her about Jonah.
We catch up to the group. George is holding Maisy’s hand and pointing out the tiny trains in the model train city when she spots us.
“Mommy, hurry up.” Maisy stomps her foot, and I hold back a laugh. She reminds me of me when I was that age. Before my uncle died and my father crushed the joy from our lives.
It’s getting harder to push those memories and the sadness away. Not caring about anything used to be easier.
“What’s wrong?” Jonah asks, his voice and face telegraphing his concern.
Thankfully, Mom and George aren’t paying attention. That won’t last.
“You need to stop.” I’m serious, but it’s hard to snap at him when he’s being so sweet. That should definitely worry me more.
“Stop what?”
I bump his shoulder. “Being nice to me.”
“I like being nice to you.” His voice is serious, which makes me feel all kinds of things. “Is that a problem?”
Yes, I want to tell him. What if I get used to it?
Instead, I nod to our parents. “Others will notice.”
He frowns, and it’s like the light has dimmed. And I can’t stand it. “Did you see the exhibit…?” I scan the area until I find something that will work. “That one. It’s the train car used in Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.”
“That’s cool.” He tilts his head, like he’s trying to figure me out. Good luck with that.
After checking no one is watching us, I grab his hand and lead him to the exhibit.
I’m just hoping to find a place with no people in it, but when we step inside, it’s even better than I’d hoped.
The train car has rows of seats on both sides, and in the front, a screen plays a video on a loop.
One person is sitting on a middle bench.
Jonah and I squeeze onto a bench in the back.
When the person finally gets up and leaves, I turn to Jonah. “What are you doing?”
His eyes are on the screen. “I’m watching the video.”
“You’re unbelievable.”
He reluctantly looks away from the video. His forehead has that cute little crease I want to smooth away with my fingers. “You brought me in here.”
“Not for the video.” I stop any further protests with my mouth.
Jonah quickly gets on board. Our kisses are light and sweet, and for a few blissful moments, I’m happy. It’s a strange feeling, but I don’t hate it.
We hear the people before they enter the area, which gives us just enough time for Jonah to move to the seat in front of me. And while I miss having Jonah’s lips on mine, the goofy grin he gives me helps make up for it.
“You’re staring,” he says in a low voice, a red tinge running up his neck. “Stop it.”
I check the new arrivals for any parental figures. Finding none, I lean forward and whisper, “I wish I could.” Then I sneak a kiss.
We stay and watch the video over and over, sneaking kisses when we can, until George and Mom find us.
Of course, Jonah has actually watched the video, so he enthusiastically tells them all about the movie and the set.
I try to keep the smile off my face, but I’m not sure I’m successful.
My phone buzzes several times with messages from Frankie. I ignore them for now.
As we’re piling into the van, I’m not surprised to get a call from Frankie.
“Why are you ignoring me?”
“I’m not.” I hold up a finger to Jonah to show I need a minute. The distance from here to the Grand Canyon is only about four hours, but he’s driving.
“You used to be able to lie better. What’s going on?”
I step out of earshot. “We’re running a little behind.”
“Define a little.”
Frankie can be scary when she wants to be. “We’re just now leaving Durango.”
“You’re two days behind?” she screeches in my ear. I pull the phone back. I knew giving her a copy of our itinerary was a mistake.
“We’re skipping a few things. It’s fine, Frankie.”
“Uh-huh. Are you fighting with your brother?”
“Stepbrother.”
She pauses. “I’m FaceTiming you.”
“No, Frankie. Everyone’s in the van waiting for me. I don’t have time for this.”
She huffs. “Fine. I need a proof-of-life pic.”
“I’m fucking talking to you. What more proof—”
“Did you just yell at me? Your bestie?”
Shit. Frankie doesn’t do tears. Her cold silence is a thousand times worse.
“Sorry, babe. Hold on.” I take a quick picture, giving her a big smile. When I turn, Mom is right there, watching me.
“I— Bathroom,” she says and takes off.
I shake my head and focus on Frankie. “Did you get it?”
“Yes.” She lets out an angry-sounding breath. “Did that muscled brute hit you?”
I laugh. “No. It’s not like that.”
“Oh my God. Did you— I know you like that kind of thing, but letting him hit you in the face is not acceptable. Did you forget he’s your stepbrother?”
“Jesus, Frankie. He didn’t do anything. We were in a bar and—”
“You went to a bar with him? The man you profess to hate? What the fuck is going on, Vivian?”
I take a deep breath. But I might as well be underwater for all the good it does me. “I really can’t talk right now. I’ll call you tonight.” And then I hang up, knowing I’ll pay for it later.
Everyone stares at me as I get in the front passenger seat. Mom has already returned and is in the back with George.
Jonah watches me, and I roll my eyes. “Can we just go, please?”
He turns on the van, and I stretch my neck, trying to get the kinks out.
“Was that your boyfriend?” Mom asks with a knowing smile. Thank God she doesn’t know shit.
Jonah shoots me a look that’s part question and part kicked puppy dog. What the hell? Is he seriously jealous?
“Why would you ask that?”
“You were taking selfies and calling him babe, so I assumed…”
I try to ignore the glare from Jonah as I turn to my mother. “It was Frankie. My bestie. We’ve been friends since elementary school.”
“Oh right. Frankie.” She sounds puzzled.
Jonah is still shooting me looks, and it takes me a minute to figure out why. He still thinks Frankie is a guy. He assumed, and I haven’t told him differently. It still doesn’t seem possible after all this time, but past me shared as little information as possible with my stepbrother.
And now, after three days on the road, I’ve shared too much of myself, including my darkest secrets and several bodily fluids.
“She’s looking forward to seeing you again, Mom. And meeting the rest of the family.”
“Frankie’s in San Diego? I thought she was in Kansas City?”
My entire focus is now on my mother. “We talked about this before we left home.”
She laughs, but it seems forced. “That’s right. Sorry, dear. My brain is a bit foggy from the p—” She stops and clamps her lips shut.
“Can we listen to music?” Dad says. “Maisy needs to take a nap.”
“No nap.” Maisy grips her dragon princess like she’s afraid someone will take it from her.
Their focus is on Maisy, so I can’t do anything but let it drop. Maybe Jonah knows what she was going to say. But he’s shaking his head and glaring at me. I turn the radio to a country station, so we aren’t overheard.
“Do you really think I have time for a boyfriend?”
“I’m not— That’s not the problem.”
“Can you give me a hint?” I ask, squeezing his leg.
“You didn’t mention your friend was going to be there.”
“So?” I don’t get why he’s so upset. “Jonah, we were barely talking to each other.”
“Right.”
I sink back in my chair, drained from the last twenty-four hours. Longer, really. Is this Jonah being butthurt over something, which he tends to do, or is it more? Can he tell I’m lying to him? What am I supposed to do? Give up my dreams for something that can’t possibly last?
Things get more tense the closer we get to our destination. Jonah is being a dick. And I can’t blame him because even though he’s most certainly wrong in whatever he’s thinking, I deserve every minute of this.
We stop at a roadside park. This time, there are no sandwiches to share. No Jonah and Maisy playing while Mom and George watch fondly. We eat junk out of the vending machine, and George has to scold Maisy more than once for throwing rocks at people.
I walk around, needing time to myself. A message comes in, and I ignore it. I’m not in the mood to talk to Frankie right now.
“It might be important,” Jonah says in a soft voice.
“Are you following me?” Seriously? I didn’t even hear him.
“Yes.” He smiles, and while it doesn’t reach his eyes, it’s an attempt. “I’m sorry for being a dick earlier.”
I raise a brow. “Just earlier?”
God, I love his crooked smile. “Maybe longer.” He takes a deep breath. “I hate that there’s so much I don’t know about you. That I hated you for so long without giving you a chance.” He studies the rock in his hand.
This man is too sweet for his own good. “Did you take that from Maisy?”
“She was trying to throw it at you.”
He hands it to me, and for a moment, our hands touch. “I fucking hate this, Viv.” He glances over his shoulder. “Follow me.”
We go around to the other side of the building. There are plenty of people here, but none of them have the last name Baker.
“I’m sorry.” He pulls me into his arms and holds me. “I’m being a dick, but this feels like it can’t last, and it makes me so angry.” He cups my face. “I just… I want more than a few days.”
This kiss is soft and full of something. It’s nothing like the heated ones from the night before or the light ones from the train. It breaks me apart and leaves me aching for more. “Jonah—”
My phone rings. And I stare at it in horror.
“Your friend has terrible timing.”
Chopin’s Funeral March drones on and on. I swallow my fear. “It isn’t Frankie.”
Stepping away from Jonah, I answer. “Hello, Father.”