Chapter 24
Chapter Twenty-Four
Jonah
Vivian waves me off as he talks to his dad. “What? No. Nothing’s going on. Things are great.”
I should walk away. Let Vivian have his privacy.
This is none of my business. But I can’t.
His father is a monster. And I can’t stand the thought of him hurting Vivian again.
I follow behind him. Not quietly. I’m not trying to be sneaky.
I want Vivian to know I’m here. He scowls at me, but then his focus is on his dad.
I’m not trying to listen in, but Mr. Beauchesne is practically yelling.
“What are you doing in Arizona?”
“Are you tracking me?” The outrage in Vivian’s voice gives me hope. Maybe he’ll stand up to his father.
I step closer.
“Of course I know where you are. I pay for your phone. Phones have GPS. But even if none of that were true, I could still find you. What were you thinking?”
Vivian doesn’t respond. I can still hear his dad talking, but I can’t make out the words. Vivian pales and his eyes dart to me. “I swear, it was nothing. We were just singing—”
Singing? At the karaoke bar? How could he possibly know what we were doing? But I remember Vivian’s words from a few days ago. If it’s on the internet, he’ll find it. My stomach drops.
There’s more yelling, but I can’t make out the words. Vivian is cupping the phone away from me. Why is he protecting this guy? He lets out a frustrated noise. “I’m old enough to drink, Father. I’m an adult.”
“Then start fucking acting like it.”
That part is clear, and I’ve had enough of this guy. I take a step toward Vivian, but he puts up his hand to stop me. His eyes plead with me to let it go. I shake my head. He looks almost frantic. He mouths his next words. “Please go.”
What is he worried about?
And then it clicks, and it’s like a slap to the face. My defending him will lend weight to his dad’s suspicion that we’re together.
It shouldn’t hurt. Mr. Beauchesne can’t find out about us. It would be disastrous. I don’t blame Vivian at all. It just reinforces the fact that we can never really be together.
I should walk away and give Vivian his space.
He’s arguing with his dad, but he’s barely getting any words in other than “no” and “but.” Finally, he yells, “Okay, fine. You got me. I’m not going to California to check out UCLA.”
I can’t hear him anymore, but I know what his next question will be. Then why are you going?
“It’s a family trip. Mom and George…and Maisy. They’re here too.”
When Vivian gets another chance to talk, he sounds desperate. “I’m not lying. But I do have another reason—” His eyes dart to me for just a second.
Holy shit. I had it all wrong. Vivian wanting me to leave isn’t about his dad. He doesn’t want me to know why we’re really on this trip.
He shoots me another pleading look, but I cross my arms and wait. This is my only chance at the truth. I’m not leaving.
With a huff of annoyance, Vivian turns away. “I have a job opportunity. The job will be remote, but I have to interview in person.”
The world shatters around me. All of this was for a job interview? Why didn’t he say anything? But this is Vivian. He’s always been a master at lying.
Is any of it real?
Vivian lets out a broken laugh. “Don’t worry, Father. I’m not auditioning to be a singer.”
He goes quiet and says, “Yes, Father. I understand.”
I hate the submissive tone in his voice with every fiber of my being. Vivian submits to his father’s control, but it isn’t his choice.
Vivian ends the call and, without a glance at me, storms away.
I don’t let him get far. “Vivian, wait. Your father is wrong. He shouldn’t—”
He whips around, his eyes furious. “I don’t need your protection, Jonah. Not now. Not ever.”
I watch him walk away, and I’m not sure how I feel. Hurt? Betrayed? As if everything that happened over the last few days meant nothing.
Anger wins. It’s familiar, especially when it comes to Vivian. But now it feels like an old shoe that doesn’t quite fit anymore.
But anger is all I have.
As we get closer to the van and our parents, I stride past Vivian. I’m ready to be back on the road and done with all of this. Dad calls us over. “Hey, I’ve been looking for you guys. Ready to go?”
“I’m ready.” I nod at Carolynda, but she stops me with a hand on my arm.
“Is everything all right, dear?”
No. Definitely not okay. I resist the urge to yank my hand away. “Ask Vivian.”
I reach the van before anyone else and pull the driver’s side door open.
Vivian is close behind, ignoring his mother’s questions. “Are you sure you should drive, Jonah?” he asks, “You seem pretty angry.”
I stare at him, so done with his crap. “Do you want to drive, Vivian?” I toss him the keys. “Be my guest.”
There’s a certain satisfaction I get from the surprised and then furious look he throws me. I slam the door as hard as I can—which ends my tirade. The window on the driver’s side drops…and then shatters into pieces.
Fuck. I’m so angry at Vivian—at this trip where nothing seems to be going right—that I use cuss words I’m not sure I’ve ever said before. Carolynda calmly covers Maisy’s ears.
I stomp away, needing a moment before I break down completely. I count to one hundred. A thousand would be more helpful, but everyone’s waiting, so I make it short.
No one says a word as I climb back into the van and start the engine. I’m back on the highway in no time.
Vivian stares out the window. That’s fine with me. Anything he has to say will most likely make me angrier.
After thirty or so miles, I’m calm enough to think clearly. More clearly.
Vivian and I have known each other for five years. Hell, I’ve been “related” to him for all of that time. But the reality is that I’ve never really known him. The last four days have proven that. On the surface, this seems like the same old Vivian, lashing out at anyone brave enough to help him.
But I know things now that I didn’t know when I was seventeen. Or even a week ago. His father is an asshole. Vivian has a sweet side that he doesn’t show very often. But the thing that stands out the most is that every time Vivian has pushed me away, I’ve taken it personally.
And it was never about me. None of it. And it hurts a bit, which is ridiculous. Was our feud, our vendetta, all in my head? Did I make everything up?
And what about now?
I’m falling for him.
But it doesn’t matter. Even if Vivian wants more—which is a stretch—his father will never accept us being together.
And Vivian will never defy his father.
I’m so focused on my thoughts that I belatedly realize something is going on with the van. It seems sluggish. We have a full tank of gas, so that’s not the problem. And then I see the check engine light. How long has that been on?
“Is something burning?” Vivian asks, leaning forward and sniffing the air.
And then I smell it. Shit. “Hold on, everyone.” I pull off the road, but I’m barely on the shoulder when black smoke starts billowing out from under the hood.
Then there’s a loud boom and the van shudders to a stop.
Shit! “Everyone out.” I open the door and climb out, ignoring the pieces of glass still falling from the window. The rest of them stare at me. “The engine’s on fire. And we just filled up with gas. Do I really need to explain this?”
Everyone shuffles out, getting as far from the van and the traffic as they can. Vivian walks up to me, hesitating. “Maybe you should check? It might not be that bad.”
“Do you know what will happen if I open the hood? The fire will get bigger. If the van is savable—newsflash, it isn’t—our only chance is to call someone who knows what they’re doing.”
“But you know how to fix things…”
“As you’ve told me, more than once, Vivian. I can’t fix everything.”