45. Charli #3
“We’re adults here. It’s in the past.” She drains her glass and turns to get a refill.
I fist my hands at my side, wanting to melt into the porch. “It’s not always all about you.”
“Obviously.” She sloshes her overfilled wine glass onto my shoe. “Playing the poor Charli card again to get sympathy?”
I swallow hard, disappointment flushing my body.
She’s getting to me and I’m letting it happen.
It’s like I’m a teenager again, just looking for the slightest bit of approval or attention from her.
“Look Mom, I’m happy, that’s all you need to be concerned about.
” I glance past her and see Sam and Ian watching us.
“I always knew you’d be fine. Too afraid to make a mistake.”
It’s as if she slapped me with her words. My face heats with anger and hurt rolled into one. My chin quivers. This is what she wanted. She’s digging deeper this time since I’ve been stronger.
“So you’re still running off to Iceland next week, alone,” she continues, tipping back her drink.
“Yes, I’m looking forward to it. It’s been planned for a while. I’m going with a travel group, not alone.” I try to keep my face impassive.
“Once you get out of here, you might not want to come back, unless it's for your new man. You've got the desire to wander like me.” She leans in and the smell of wine is thick on her breath.
A hand is on my hip and I know it’s Gage. I gather my strength, really wanting to tell my mom off, but it won’t matter. My dad was right before, I need to stay detached from her. I can only control myself. Feeding into her taunts will just get me worked up so I take a deep breath.
Fighting back tears, I say, “Maybe I do, mom, but I wouldn't leave if I had a kid here that’s for sure. Have a good visit with everyone. We need to leave now.” I push past her.
We turn and I wave to my family and say, “See you all later.” Mimi blows me a kiss and Gage takes my hand as we quickly take the steps to the driveway.
But my mom can’t stop herself. She follows us down the steps and catches up to me in the driveway.
She reaches for my shoulder and I yank it away from her.
“Charli, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to travel and have a fling with a cute guy.
You’re too young to be tied down. Don’t make the same mistakes I did. ”
I freeze, my back to her and my grip tight on the handle.
Gage faces her, tension radiating off his body.
He puts his hand across my middle protectively.
“Look, Susanna, you lost the right to give your opinions to Charli when you took off on her a long time ago. You don’t know her and she’s nothing like you.
And unless you’re going to apologize for a lifetime of hurt, I suggest you shut the hell up. ”
I look at her over my shoulder. “He’s not a fling.”
My mom stands there stunned by his words. No one ever told her off despite her shitty behavior. They've treated her delicately like the immature adult that she is, ignoring her verbal assaults and enabling her behavior.
He takes the keys from my palm, and I collapse into the passenger side of the Jeep as he drives to the docks.
I stay in the cabin for the sunset sail and lay on his bunk hugging his pillow.
It smells like him. The guests board and listen to Gage and Teddy speaking as they motor out of the harbor.
I rummage around and find a pair of my leggings and one of his sweatshirts, and I change out of my dress.
Once they pass the channel marker, Gage comes down below to check on me. I’m finally relaxing after that visit with her. He sits beside me and strokes my hair.
“How are you, Sweets?”
“Thanks for being there for me and letting me hide out here. I just don’t want to be alone right now. But I don’t want to be at Mimi and Pop’s if she’s there.”
“I get it.” He places a kiss on my head.
I sigh and look at him. His eyes are filled with concern. “I kept it together and didn't let her break me again.” Still, my eyes are watery and I’m so spent.
“You did great. I hope I didn’t overstep with what I said.” He runs his hand through his hair. “She deserved it.”
“She did. No one ever talked to her like that for me.” I say, my voice small. “I love you so much.”
“I love you too.”
I blink at him in disbelief, as he reaches for me, pressing his lips to mine. Immediately, I get lost in his kiss, in his love for me. He covers me with his body, flattening me to the mattress. I run my fingers through his hair as our tongues wrap around each other’s.
He makes me feel like I can do anything, like anything is possible if we’re together. But it’s more than the happy moments. It’s being there for each other even when things aren’t pretty. He picked me up when I was rattled. I want to be there for him when the time comes, if he’ll let me.
A loud thump from above breaks our moment. He lifts his face from mine. “I have to go up there to help Teddy.”
He drops another kiss to my forehead before he walks away. I roll to my side. This is what I wanted, but I still want more.