Chapter Fifteen #3
She didn’t know what she was asking. “I’ve spent the past twenty years learning how not to need anyone or let anyone get close.”
“So? Unlearn it.” She shoved his shoulder until he was facing the window again. “Do you see that? You could have that. All you have to do is admit you love her. You do, you know. You have since the moment you met her. Just take one small chance. I promise you won’t regret it.”
He heard her walk away, but he didn’t move from his place at the window.
He stared at the family scene in front of him and felt a longing so strong he thought he might die.
His entire life history told him she couldn’t possibly love him.
That somehow even if she did, he would fail her.
But he wasn’t sure he was strong enough to let her walk away.
A gust of wind sent the kite crashing into the ground. He watched as Heather spoke with the teenager, then headed back to the office. Jim quickly took his seat.
Suddenly, Heather walked into the office and paused. “Where’s Flo?” she asked. “I have to leave for a dentist appointment and she said she would watch Diane.”
Heather was wearing a pink dress with short sleeves and buttons down the front. Soft blond curls teased at her face. She was tall and slender and the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen.
“I can watch her,” he said, a little surprised that he could talk.
She didn’t look convinced. “Maybe she’s in back.”
“I think she left, but I don’t know where she went.”
Heather frowned. “How odd. That’s not like her at all. We just talked about it earlier this morning. I don’t think she forgot.”
“Don’t worry. Diane and I will be fine.”
He stood up and walked around to take the baby out of her stroller. Diane grinned when she saw him. He picked her up and kissed her cheek. At least being with Diane would help him forget about Heather for a little while.
“I don’t really have a choice,” she said. “Not that I don’t appreciate this, but I’m a little worried about Flo. Are you sure you’ll be all right? I could take her with me.”
Are you sure you’ll be all right?
He understood how she meant the question, but suddenly those seven words took on a significance far greater than what she’d implied.
Would he be all right? He looked at the baby smiling up at him, at that baby’s lovely mother.
He thought about all the joy they’d brought to him.
How he only felt complete and healed when he was with Heather.
He thought about the shared laughter and how she understood that it was important for him to help people.
He thought about how she’d seen into the withered darkness of his soul and still claimed to love him.
No, not claimed. He knew Heather well enough to know that she didn’t say things she didn’t mean.
She loved him. Who was he trying to kid?
There was no way he could live without these two in his life.
He couldn’t stand to be alone anymore. He had to let her inside.
He had to love her and let her love him back.
Heather shifted her handbag onto her shoulder. “I guess I’ll be going.”
He took a step toward her. “No. Don’t go. Please. I want…” He paused, not sure what he needed to say. Then he realized the truth would be the easiest. “I love you.”
Her eyes opened wide. “What?”
“I love you. I need you so much. I can’t breathe without you.
You are the light of my world, and so is your daughter.
I don’t want you to take another job and I don’t want you to walk out of my life.
I don’t want Diane to know a father other than me.
” He took another step closer until he could have touched her.
He shifted the baby so she rested in the crook of his right arm, and with his left, he pulled Heather close. “I thought if I kept rescuing everyone else, no one would notice that I was the one nearly drowning. But you saw that.”
“Oh, Jim.” She rested her forehead against his shoulder.
“I love you, and I want to marry you. I want us to be a real family. I want us to have more kids and to always be together. I’ll do anything. Just please don’t go.”
She raised her head and he saw tears glimmering in her eyes. “I could never leave you.” She smiled. “Even when you were too stubborn to realize we belonged together.” Her smile faded. “Are you scared?”
“Terrified. But I’m going to risk it all because I don’t want to lose you.”
“You won’t.” She kissed him. “You can’t.”
“You can’t lose me, either.” He touched her face, then cupped the back of her neck and drew her to him. “Let me love you forever.”
“Only if you let me love you right back.”
He agreed, because now there weren’t any doubts.
As she held him close and murmured how much she cared, he felt the last shard of pain fall from his heart and blow away.
The past would always be a part of him because it had shaped who he had become.
But it no longer owned him. He’d found a different place to live.
He’d finally found where he belonged…right in Heather’s arms.
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