Chapter 26
Summer
I arrive in Las Vegas a day earlier than planned because Taryn invited me to her bachelorette party and it sounds like a really fun evening.
She’s a model, and now that I’ve met her, I realize I’ve seen her face a lot more than I initially thought.
And some of her model and designer friends are throwing her a bachelorette fashion show.
Alexa Humboldt, a huge name designer whose clothes I love but could never afford, rented out a hotel ballroom and is hosting it.
There’s going to be a fashion show where people get to bid on the clothes—all of which are being donated—and the proceeds are going to charity in Taryn’s name.
And someone named Hettie, who owns a clothing line called Rock Vibe, is dressing all of us.
That’s saying something because there are some huge names here.
Cheyenne is literally the biggest supermodel in the world—I had no idea Taryn knew her.
Not to mention Stevie Marchand, Saylor Bonetti, and a few other celebrity models and actresses. I’m a little intimidated at first but Taryn must sense that because she goes out of her way to introduce me to everyone and then I’m the first person in the makeup chair.
“You have great skin,” the makeup artist on site says to me. “You practically glow.”
I flush because that’s something they say about pregnant women, but I didn’t think it was literal.
“What size do you normally wear?” Hettie asks me.
“Uh, well, usually a six but…” I hesitate. “I’m thirteen weeks pregnant so even though I haven’t gained any weight, my waist is disappearing.”
Hettie nods like it’s no big deal. “Don’t worry about a thing—I know just what you’re going to wear.” She bustles off, and I watch in fascination. I’ve never had professional hair and makeup done, so this is fun for me, and everyone is in high spirits.
There’s a bar onsite, and Taryn assured me there would be plenty of mocktails so I didn’t feel left out.
And I don’t. In fact, as I get through hair, makeup, and letting Hettie dress me, I feel like a princess.
Like this could almost be my bachelorette party.
In a way, it feels like Taryn has done it on purpose, going out of her way to include me in everything—even more so than her model friends and Ryleigh, who’s going to be her maid of honor.
And everyone is just…nice. Normal. I wouldn’t know I was in a room full of supermodels and actresses except for how gorgeous they are. I look pretty great too, and I take a quick selfie, sending it to Tate, who’s going to his own bachelor party tonight.
SUMMER: I know you’re busy but just in case you forget who you’re coming home to tonight…
He responds immediately.
TATE: I never forget who I’m coming home to—and holy wow, you look incredible! What are you wearing?
Taryn’s mom, Tracy, is nearby, so I ask her to take a full-length picture of me, and she does.
I’m wearing a low-cut black leather vest that hangs just past my hips.
Because of the way it’s cut it portrays a waistline I don’t actually have anymore, and I absolutely love it.
She paired it with a stretchy red miniskirt that laces up the front, giving lots of room for my expanding stomach, but still makes me look sexy.
And Taryn told me to wear black heels to bring the outfit together nicely.
I send Tate the picture, and he calls instead of texting.
“Are you trying to kill me?” he demands.
I chuckle. “Maybe?”
His voice softens. “Are you having fun?”
“I am. This is the wildest bachelorette party I’ve ever been to—but I have to go. The fashion show is about to start.”
“Have a great time—and I’ll see you later.”
“Bye.” I quickly hang up and get into my seat to watch the fun.
Taryn opens the show wearing a gold lame ball gown with miles of ruffles. On anyone else it might look tacky but it’s actually beautiful—and Taryn wears it well. They’re playing “Living on the Edge” and she lip syncs along with the song as she does a twirl, letting the dress fan out around her.
There’s a photographer taking pictures, the room is full of women having a great time, and for the first time since I found out I was pregnant, I forget.
Forget the pregnancy, the baby, and for a few minutes, even that I’m eloping in a few days.
The only thing that matters tonight is living it up with a wonderful new set of friends.
I don’t harbor any illusions that I’m going to be hanging out with people like Cheyenne in the future, but I also don’t feel as out of place as I might have two months ago. This is my life too, and I’m going to enjoy the hell out of it.
“This is so fun,” Ryleigh yells in my ear. “Only Taryn would have a fashion show by a famous designer for her bachelorette party.”
“It’s ridiculous,” I agree. “But so much fun.”
She nods. “Now I’m going to have to find something equally unique for mine!”
“Have you set a date?”
She shakes her head. “No. We’ve been in couples counseling—we hit a rough spot early in our relationship—so we’re just going with the flow. We live together and are finding our way as a couple. We’re not in a rush to make it legal.”
“But you want to marry him?”
“Oh, absolutely.” She nods emphatically. “But I’m happy to let him focus on the band for now. I can do my own thing while they work on being the biggest rock band in the world.”
“Do you worry about being apart a lot? Don’t you own a magazine?”
“I don’t worry about us being apart because even when we are, we talk and text all day long.
And we own the magazine together, though he’s more of a silent partner.
I’m busy with that so I have responsibilities separate from our relationship, which is important to me.
I didn’t want to have to rely on him for everything.
I mean, I absolutely rely on his emotional support, always, but I like having my own career.
My own friends. My own life that isn’t about his.
” She cocks her head. “Are you worried about losing yourself in Tate?”
“I’m worried about losing myself in motherhood.
That’s kind of what my mom did, and while she was the best mom, she gave up the best years of her life for me.
At the expense of her own happiness. When my dad left, she never dated or did much of anything that didn’t include me.
Now she’s sick, and I feel like she wasted her life. ”
“But that was her choice,” Ryleigh says gently.
“I mean, I don’t know her, but she made a choice to prioritize you.
That doesn’t mean you have to. You can’t go into this relationship assuming he’s going to leave and then you’ll be on your own.
That’s not what my independence is about.
I think it makes us stronger to have our own things going on. ”
“I’m trying to build up my baking business, but I don’t want to open a bakery because that would mean crazy hours, away from both Tate and the baby. That’s not what I want.”
“Think about what’s going to make you happy—outside of Tate and the baby.
And also, just because I wanted my independence, that doesn’t mean you have to find a career.
Lots of women are happy being mothers and homemakers.
You can still build a life that way. Friends.
The baby will be starting school before you know it, and I hear that’s how most women make friends during the child-rearing years.
And of course, you’ll have us. The band wives. We’re a family too.”
“But you live in Minneapolis, right?”
“I do, but Taryn technically lives in Los Angeles. She and Mick are basically nomads at the moment because she doesn’t want to upset her son’s life. He had enough of a struggle with the leukemia.”
“I can’t even imagine finding out my kid has cancer,” I whisper.
“I know. That’s why they’re a bit nomadic.
They live with her mom when they’re in L.A.
They keep stuff at our house in Minneapolis right now, because we have a lot of room and there’s no reason for them to spend money on an apartment they’re not in very much.
And Kirsten’s in college in New York, with no idea what’s next for her, so she and Sam do their own thing and then come together whenever they can.
There are no set rules in life or relationships.
Follow your heart, Summer. Don’t let Tate or the pregnancy or anything else derail your dreams.”
“Thank you for this,” I say. “I needed to hear that.”
She smiles. “That’s what friends are for.”
It feels really good to hear her say that—and she’s given me a lot to think about.