Chapter 36
Lumi
The men exchange another glance, and my heart races.
I’m dressed in an oversized shirt now. Ambrose is fully clothed minus a rip in the bottom half of his shirt, and Nyx is now completely naked—like Isolde thinks he’s the only one so beneath the rest of us that he doesn’t even deserve clothes.
She just sees him as an animal she can control.
Nyx turns his attention to me with a wicked gleam in his eyes. He scrapes that fang over his bottom lip in a tantalizing way. I guess they’ve decided he gets to go first.
I shift my full attention to him, trying not to think too much and just letting this happen. This is what I want. I want to enjoy this moment. It might be the last moments of pleasure I ever get in this world.
But then I spot Ambrose moving closer as well, out of the corner of my eye, his heat drawing me to him in equal measure.
“What are you doing?” I speak out loud, my voice hoarse and dry.
“Fucking you, love—together. We aren’t giving Isolde the satisfaction of figuring out which man fucks you better. We are taking control and making this all about your pleasure. Besides, there is no way we can watch you with the other while not touching you ourselves. Are you okay with that, love?”
Both of them.
At the same time.
My cheeks flush as my eyes cut back and forth between the two men. I can’t get a word out. Can’t think straight about what I’m agreeing to. Just that I want it. I want them. Both of them.
I nod, it’s the best I can do.
But there is no way this is happening. They hate each other. They won’t work together. They’ll fight, stir up drama, and stop this from happening in the end. This won’t end up happening.
At least, that’s what I tell myself as I watch them both inch toward me. I don’t know who to look at. I don’t know where to look. They both prowl, both walk toward me like they know exactly what to do with my body.
But the problem is, Ambrose hasn’t touched me since I fell for Nyx, and Nyx hasn’t touched me since he fell for Amora. For that reason alone, I should stop this from happening.
This can’t happen.
It would be wrong, especially if we survive this.
Odds are we won’t. That’s the comfort I keep repeating to myself.
I’m leaning against the wall, gripping onto the thin blanket like my life depends on it. There is no comfortable bed for us to fuck in. There will be nothing comfortable about this. It doesn’t change what I want, though.
I want them.
Both of them.
As much as I know in my heart that Ambrose is my mate, I, too, want more proof than what the seers have said. It’s been so long since I’ve been with either of them, maybe this will remind me why Ambrose is my mate.
Or confuse me further into thinking that Nyx should be my mate, my subconscious says to me.
Stop thinking.
This isn’t about thinking.
This is about controlling my own destiny.
This is about pleasure.
This is about us.
The men stop, both towering over me, and I’m eye level with both of their cocks.
I stare at Ambrose’s; it feels safer, as his is still covered by his shorts. While Nyx’s is on full display.
Both extend their hands to me, and I hesitate.
Am I really going to do this? Am I really going to ask them to do this for me?
This is insane.
I can feel Nyx’s intense stare, and I look up at him. “Slip into his mind—now.”
My chest heaves at that. I want to tell him no. He doesn’t get to boss me around. But that serious gleam in his eyes, the one that says defy me and find out, has me slipping into Ambrose’s mind so fucking fast I feel dizzy.
“I want you, love. I want to fuck you. You aren’t coercing me. I don’t care that I’m fucking you at the same time that Ambrose is. I just want you to feel the most pleasure you can. Don’t you dare for a second think otherwise.”
“I want this, too. I want you, anyway I can get you. While I’d prefer to have you on my own in a big, comfortable bed, I’m not going to deny myself this. And I’m definitely not going to deny you. I’d never deny you. You deserve the world—let me give it to you,” Ambrose says.
I shudder at both of their words. I’m going to regret my decision in the best possible way.
Nyx takes my hand in his, wrapping his fingers around mine. He lifts my palm to his lips and kisses me tenderly on the center of my palm.
The softest of moans pushes through my lips.
“Gods, I want you,” he says in Ambrose’s mind.
Ambrose takes my other hand. His touch isn’t quite as bold as Nyx’s.
His touch isn’t as familiar. He moves a fraction of a second slower, like he has all the time in the world.
Slowly, he cups my hand, lifting it to his lips as if he’s about to drink from my hand, and then kisses the center of my palm.
Another shudder races through me. My mind is already comparing the two men. Thinking about who touched me better, who had the better kiss, who do I want more.
“Don’t compare us. Don’t even think about the word mate. This isn’t about that, not for us,” Nyx says as he steps into my space. He pulls hard, lifting me to my feet.
“Agreed, don’t compare us,” Ambrose says, stepping forward so that each man is standing so that they are straddling a leg. I feel both of their hot breaths on my neck. I feel the draw to both of their bodies.
“Besides, if you did, I’d win hands down,” Nyx says.
I’m about to chastise him for his comments when Ambrose fires right back. “Like hell she would, blood-sucker. She’s mine.”
And then Ambrose kisses me. Without thought. Without awkwardness. He leans into the kiss in an all-consuming way. He devours me, angling my head so that he can kiss me deeper and harder than he’s ever kissed me before.
That ancient, earthy scent invades my nostrils, a hungry fire that burns through my body. His scent is strong, comforting, and overwhelming. The kind that says this is who I am, and I won’t apologize for it.
I open my eyes and see Nyx smirking at me. As if this was his plan all along.
“Asshole,” I say to Nyx through Ambrose’s mind, knowing that Ambrose can hear me as well.
“Definitely,” Nyx says, grabbing Ambrose’s bicep. He pulls him back, stepping into the space that Ambrose had just occupied. Ambrose grunts, but otherwise allows Nyx to take the space that Ambrose was just standing in, but he doesn’t let go of my hand.
Nyx doesn’t hesitate. His hand comes up to the nape of my neck, his finger tangling in the base of my hair as he presses his entire body against me, kissing me.
Icy cold alights the spots that Ambrose just heated to fire-level temperatures. My entire body chills in the most delicious way as his tongue separates my lips, allowing him entry into my mouth.
He pushes against my body until my back hits the wall behind me, and I’m thoroughly pinned to the spot.
“Her back, you asshole,” Ambrose shouts in my mind, trying to pull Nyx off me.
Nyx doesn’t budge. His lips release me, but his arm cages me in, staring at me like he’s waiting for me to tell Ambrose that he didn’t hurt me. Quite the opposite.
“You two are going to be the death of me,” I say through the bond.
“That’s the plan, love. If we die together in blissful fucking, I couldn’t think of a better way to die,” Nyx says.
“Is your back okay?” Ambrose ignores Nyx.
“I don’t think it’s possible for me to feel pain when either of you is kissing me. I want more. Are you up for the challenge?” I purr.
Nyx leans in and immediately kisses my neck. I throw my head back, giving him more space to kiss me. Before I can even process what’s happening, Ambrose is kissing the other side of my neck.
This can’t be happening. This can’t be real.
“It’s fucking real, love,” Nyx growls into my mind while he nibbles on my earlobe.
I close my eyes, trying to relax as I let myself feel this moment. With both of them kissing me at the same time, it’s easy to compare them.
Nyx’s kisses are purposeful, demanding, fleeting—like he thinks every kiss is going to be his last and he can’t get enough of me.
Ambrose’s kisses are tender, claiming, possessive—like he hates sharing me, but will to bring me pleasure even though each kiss is him claiming me as his.
Fire on one side. Ice on the other.
Two completely different men. Different alphas. Different styles. And for one night, I get them both.
“What do you want, love?” Nyx says. He angles his head as he says it, demanding more of my skin to kiss and giving Ambrose less of me. Ambrose doesn’t let him bother him, though, as he kisses down my collarbone and over the top of my breast through the T-shirt I’m wearing.
Both men inch closer until their bodies are pressed against each side of me.
I gasp as I feel how hard both of them are. Nyx’s cock is hard against my stomach, my shirt the only thing separating us. But Ambrose’s is equally hard through his pants.
Gods, what have I gotten myself into?
“I want you both. In every way, you can have me. I give you both full control of my body, of my pleasure. Fuck me,” I say.
“Good girl,” Nyx says, before he drops, kneeling down.
My eyes follow him down, and I’m not sure I’ve ever seen anything sexier than him kneeling in front of me. His dark eyes full of dirty promises. Ambrose turns my head, demanding my kiss as I feel Nyx trail kisses from my ankle up my leg.
Their competitive nature will work in my favor.
Both of them are trying to one-up each other.
But for once, it doesn’t feel like a competition to me.
I don’t have to choose one over the other.
I don’t have to claim one as my mate. I don’t have to say I love you to either.
I get to have them both. Mate, lover. Love and lust. I get both.
Nyx kisses up to the hem of my shirt before his hands dive under, pushing the fabric up in a desperate desire to feel more of my skin.
I reach my hand down to tangle in Nyx’s hair, but Ambrose grabs my arms and pushes them over my head as he kisses me aggressively in a claiming manner.