Chapter 11
Chapter Eleven
Lia
I 'm sitting on the bed, staring at the yellow flowers in the drawer next to it. There are ten of them inside, all brought to me by Kallum over the past days. I can’t stop thinking about them, something niggling at me as my eyes drift over the petals and when I touch them. I hold one in my hands, trying to work out what’s so special about it. But it just looks like any other flower to me. There’s nothing that makes it stand out specifically.
I hear muffled voices in the hall outside my door and drop the flower back into the drawer, closing it quietly and moving away from it. I think it’s best if my little collection isn’t common knowledge, considering how Grith reacted to them when he found my drawer full of them all those years ago. I’d always assumed he’d been jealous that someone was giving me gifts and had destroyed them to be cruel, but now I’m not so sure, or, at least, perhaps it wasn’t just that. He certainly was thorough about ensuring he burned every single one to ash and searched my room for them every day over the days that followed before I escaped.
I look up as my door opens to see Jak, and I smile. I haven’t seen him since he healed me, that day that Dane ... I’ve lost track of how many days ago that was. When he didn’t return, I sort of wondered if perhaps he’d felt put upon by having to deal with the human’s many injuries, which had smarted a bit because I thought we were on our way to becoming friends. Because of that, I find myself a bit wary as he enters, wondering why he’s here.
‘Are you well?’ he asks, looking as if he thinks I might not be.
I nod, and he frowns.
‘I’m sorry I haven’t come to look in on you.’ He glances away. ‘Healer Skith told me ... I wasn’t permitted to see you now that he’s taken over your care .’
His last word is said with such animosity that I’m certain he knows what Skith’s brand of care looks like.
‘I snuck away, so I won’t have long before he begins to wonder where I’ve got to.’
Jak surveys me slowly as he talks. ‘You look tired,’ he remarks, his brow furrowing as he peers at me carefully.
I chuckle. ‘A lack of sleep is the least of my worries.’
He winces and looks concerned. ‘I heard about Varrik’s orders ... Is there anything I can bring you? If you want anything, anything at all , you need only ask me.’
‘Do you mean that?’ I ask, a bit overcome by his generosity.
In the fold, a place where I’m despised, an offer like this is more rare and more precious than anything I can think of. Never have I been given such a promise.
‘Of course,’ he replies readily. ‘After everything, I’d like to think that we’re friends, Lia. Anything. Herbs. Teas .’
He says those last words meaningfully, and I give him a small smile. He would risk Varrik’s wrath to ensure I wasn’t bred against my wishes. I’m glad I don’t have to ask that of him.
‘Dane brings me a tea,’ I murmur. ‘Thank you. And we are friends,’ I whisper, blinking back foolish tears. ‘But there’s nothing I need.’
It’s a lie that rolls smoothly off my tongue because although there is something he might be able to help me with, I’m afraid he won’t understand. Jak might be my friend, but I don’t know how he really feels about Varrik or how he’ll react if I tell him about the fae lord’s threats against the faeling.
Still, perhaps he’ll be able to answer my questions about Ryon, at least, considering what Skith told me about the boy spending time with the healers.
‘Do you know a faeling that was brought here recently?’ I ask. ‘He’s not very old, with blond hair.’
‘Ryon?’ Jak’s eyes unfocus and he gives a fond grin. ‘Aye, he’s a good little fellow, always trying to help.’ He sobers as he speaks. ‘Misses his family though, poor lad. What of him?’
I stutter, trying to think of something to say that won’t give anything away. He won’t believe me if I say that the boy is being used as leverage over me. Why would he ever countenance such an accusation?
‘I just ... noticed him ... in the keep, and I wanted to make sure he was well,’ I say vaguely.
Jak stares into my face for a moment too long, seeing too much. I look away first.
‘He’s well,’ he murmurs, ‘and ... I’ll make sure he stays that way.’
My eyes snap back to his face, wondering if he does know something, but he doesn’t say anything more about Ryon.
‘I have to go,’ he says. ‘I’ll try to come back again when I can, but Skith has been keeping a closer eye on me than usual. If I don’t see you as soon as I’d like, it’s not because I don’t want to come, you understand.’
‘Thank you,’ I whisper.
He gives me a playful wink and leaves the room quickly, closing the door with an almost inaudible click behind him.
I stare after him, hoping that he meant what I think he did, that he’ll really ensure no one hurts Ryon. My shoulders relax a little, and I realize how thoughts of the faeling being hurt because of me have been weighing on me.
A moment later, almost without thinking about it, I have the drawer open, and I’m touching the flowers again. The fascination seems to be growing, but even the Harbinger doesn’t have an explanation for my interest.
Maybe my mind is finally breaking after so long in this room.
I'm still staring at them when I hear my door open again. This time, it's Dane. I've been hearing the sounds of the banquet all evening. He doesn’t say anything; he just regards me. He puts a bowl and the wooden cup of tea he’s carrying on the table.
‘I brought you some fruit,’ he says.
‘Thank you.’
His eyes glitter at my monotone reply.
‘They’ve brought you clothes?’ he asks.
I nod, wondering why he’s trying to make conversation when he’s hardly spoken two words to me since Fiana returned. ‘Servants brought a few.’
Along with enough wood to last the night and into tomorrow, as well as a decent meal for once. But he already knows that. He must have spoken to Varrik.
‘And how were they, the servants? Did they say anything to you? Were they rude or disrespectful?’
‘No, they didn’t say anything.’ Only stared at me in anger that they were being forced to attend me at all.
He stares at me for a moment, and I almost wonder if he's thinking anything other than what he has to do now. Does he think of her when he takes me? I shy away from the thought, not liking that at all, yet hating that I care. I have no claim on him.
‘Where?’ I ask.
‘On the bed,’ he says.
‘Dress on or off.’
His jaw tightens. Whether it’s my words or my lack of emotion, I don’t know.
‘On,’ he grates out.
I get on the bed.
‘On your hands and knees,’ he says.
I shudder a little bit as I remember how the healer did things today, but before I can move, he stops me and gestures to my neck.
At the bruises from Fiana, I realize. I shrug. She must not have told Rikoth to hide them as she has in the past. Perhaps she forgot, but more likely, she no longer cares that anyone knows what she does. She is Varrik’s favored elite now, from what I’ve gleaned from listening to the servants.
‘Kallum,’ I say.
Another lie flows from my tongue easily, and I see his eyes narrow.
I meet his gaze. ‘I asked for it,’ I elaborate numbly.
He doesn't say a word, and I turn, getting onto the bed on all fours as he told me and counting the stones of the wall.
I feel his fingers part me, and I wince at his breath on my core. He begins to lick me to readiness. He seems to prefer it, and he makes it feel good, but I despise the intimacy of it. I should just ready myself, but I suppose some foolish part of me doesn't because when he has to do it, he spends more time with me.
Pathetic.
When I'm wet enough to his satisfaction, he pushes into me, stifling his groan as if he doesn't want anyone to know he enjoys it. I brace myself, knowing that his pace will be quick. He wants it to be done fast so that he can leave again to go and be with Fiana.
I say again to myself that at least it's him and not one of the others, but it's a hollow comfort now. He finishes in record time, and I'm thankful that it’s over and that he didn’t force me to come. I hate it when he makes my body betray me even further. He pulls out of me and pushes my dress down to cover me as if he’s trying to pretend it didn’t happen, that his seed isn’t dripping from me.
He goes to the door. He looks furious. Much more than usual. I still barely stop myself from begging him to stay with me, to hold me.
But he hesitates at the threshold, his hand on the latch, and casts his eyes around the room. They linger on the mirror, on my reflection in it.
For a moment, I’m afraid he guesses my thoughts. His eyes find mine and in place of his anger is a sorrow that throws me.
‘I didn’t want this,’ he whispers. ‘You know that, don’t you? I never wanted this .’
‘Yes, Dane, I’m sure that when you contacted Varrik, you didn’t think all this would happen.’ I scoff. ‘And, yes, I do know you never wanted me. You’ve always made that very clear.’
‘That’s not ...’ He shakes his head. ‘You don’t?—’
‘You’ve done what you came to do,’ I interrupt.
I turn away from him, not willing to assuage whatever guilt he’s clearly carrying, and a moment later, I hear the door. I don’t turn back around; instead, I go to the ewer that’s on a stand by the fire. The servants have left me a pot and a bucket of water now, so I can at least make tea and wash properly even if no one comes.
I clean the evidence of Dane away, knowing that the healer won't be here again until tomorrow now, so I don’t need to leave any evidence for him to inspect.
Afterward, I curl up by the fire, and I shake my head at myself, hoping that I dream of the Harbinger tonight so I can find out what it’s been doing. It’s been quiet, and I wonder if it’s avoiding me. I also have a dawning suspicion that it’s keeping something from me.
If it’s hiding things, I’m sure it has its reasons, but I’m beginning to fear that the time for escape is never going to come. Successfully leaving the fold is something that's getting more and more difficult to imagine as the weeks wear on in this room. Despite Grey and Kal’s visits and their attempts to find answers, each day grows worse.
I drink the tea that Dane left on the table, glad at least that Varrik will never have a babe from me no matter what.
It tastes better than usual, and that reminds me of how much I hate this place, Dane, and what Varrik is making us do. Except that I don't hate Dane at all. I wish I did. It would make things simpler.
I hear the door again, and I errantly wonder if Kal has come back with more information about what he and Grey discovered tonight. I frown. Why would he come through the …
As I catch a glimpse of the dainty hand on the doorframe, I know it’s not a friend, and my heart sinks. But why is she back again so soon?
I steel myself not to show any of my feelings because I know that she'll magnify any emotion on my face tenfold.
I stand up in the middle of the room, facing her and not cowering. I keep my eyes on the wall behind her, and Fiana smiles at me. She doesn't even speak. She just snaps her fingers, and I fall to the ground, writhing in pain. I bite my tongue so that I don't give her the satisfaction of my cries, but my body feels like it’s on fire.
I don't know how long it goes on, but when the agony finally ebbs, the floor beneath me is wet.
She’s chuckling to herself, and I’m silently begging the Harbinger to help me. But it stays quiet and it doesn’t come forth.
‘Did you think there would be no comeuppance, swine?’ she asks.
She comes closer and turns me over with her silk-slippered foot so that I'm looking up at her. She laughs at my wet dress, where my bladder gave up during her torture, and then puts her foot on my neck, keeping me anchored to the floor.
‘Answer.’
‘I don’t know what you mean,’ I rasp.
The foot digs in. ‘It doesn't matter what he does with you. He’s mine. He’s always been mine.’
This is because of Dane’s visit tonight, I realize. I should have known that despite her words to the contrary, I’d still be punished for ‘taking’ what was hers. It doesn’t matter that I have no choice.
I say nothing, and she lets out a small sigh. ‘Still, Varrik’s orders must be followed for now,’ she says airily, looking at her fingernails, ‘and so must mine.’
My face must show my confusion.
‘Did you forget my words so quickly, piggy?’ Her foot disappears, and she moves around me to step between my legs, forcing them wider as she leans over me. ‘Gods only know how your kind procreate so rapidly,’ she sneers. ‘I told you that when he seeds you, you’re to stay in the bed at least an hour after.’
I grimace. ‘I-I forgot.’ I swallow the words I actually want to say to her. In the absence of any real power over Fiana, I only have my words to ensure my safety and that means biting my tongue.
‘I’m sorry,’ I choke out, finding it harder to cajole her than anticipated.
Her shoe presses on my thigh hard, and I’m sure I feel the bone bow.
‘I WILL have my babe, Harbinger,’ she hisses. ‘Must I order Skith to watch each time and tie you to the bed after Dane is finished?’
I shake my head. ‘I’ll stay in the bed,’ I tell her.
Her eyes narrow, and she nods, removing her foot from my leg and stepping away. ‘See that you do.’
I successfully keep my angry tears at bay and listen as she leaves the room with a sniff of derision, bored of me now that she’s punished me for my transgressions. Sitting up a few moments later, I note that Fiana has left no evidence that she was here. There are no new marks on my body from her torture, not even on my leg, just a lump coming up on the back of my skull where I fell to the ground.
Perhaps she doesn’t want anyone to know, after all.
Torpidly, I get to my feet and strip off the soiled dress, my movements slow. Resigned. I put it over one of the chairs and don the long-sleeved chemise that appeared today along with the dresses. I get into bed and stare at the wall.
‘How much longer?’ I whisper to the Harbinger.
But it doesn’t have an answer for me.
‘As soon as I break through this binding, I'm going to kill that bitch!’
I give the Harbinger a rueful look as we sit beside the Black Lake. It’s been three days since the banquet, and an unwritten schedule seems to be in effect.
Every morning, Dane comes. He ensures food has been brought and the fire is lit. He gives me the tea, which I drink. Even if it’s too hot, I force every burning drop down my gullet.
Then, he does what he’s there to do, and each time, he seems angrier than the last. When it’s done, he leaves without speaking, and then I stay in the bed as Fiana has ordered. Although I may be downtrodden at the moment, I’m far from broken. I take a perverse joy in knowing that her edicts will make no difference and that she will never have a child from me, no matter what.
She usually comes almost an hour after Dane leaves, as far as I can tell, poking her head through the door as soon as she’s opened it to catch me out. She delights in my obedience, walking around the room and telling me in great and sordid detail what she and Dane have been up to in her room across the way.
I loathe listening to her words, hate hearing how he finds joy in her arms ... and she in his, of course. She describes all he does to pleasure her, the time he takes with her, how sweetly he takes her, and all the positions they’ve done it in.
Yesterday, she brought the healer with her, and they spoke about me as if I wasn’t there, as if I couldn’t hear them or was too feeble-minded to understand them. I stared at the wall as I felt his revolting hands on me and listened to their snide remarks about my human body. Fiana told Skith that she was sure ‘the slave’ wasn’t keeping to the bed after she was mounted, and he told her about a special stopper used on human females that don’t have time to lay about in bed all day. When he was finished with me, she gave me a vicious smile and told him to send for one from the Dark Realms for her wayward human.
It didn’t shock me that she believes that I’m hers to do with as she wills, just as I’m not surprised by anything her cruel and depraved mind comes up with.
After she leaves, I’m usually left to myself for a while. I wash and then read. Jak came this morning for just a few minutes and told me he’s been keeping an eye on Ryon and that he has a place to hide him should the need arise. After he left, I cried in relief.
I glance at the Harbinger’s profile next to me, so similar yet different from my own.
This strange plane and my times with Grey and Kallum are my only respites from the keep, but even those stolen moments have become fewer as Fiana barges in whenever she likes. Spending more than a moment or two with me is too dangerous for them both. That, and they’ve been using much of their unoccupied time trying to plan the best way for us to leave ... as well as finding a viable means of escape, which is proving to be nigh on impossible.
Kallum stole and tested Rikoth’s necklace last night but found it wouldn’t open the Breach inside the fold. It’s only a means of returning. He was angry when it didn’t work and, though he tried to hide it, I know that they don’t have any other ideas yet.
The only way is to get rid of the binding and the Harbinger is still not ready.
‘I don’t know how much longer I can do this,’ I whisper to it, looking at the lake.
The Harbinger winces and embraces me tightly. ‘I’m almost strong enough, but I need to conserve my energy so that I’ll be able to break through when the time is right.’
But when will the time be right?
I sit down on the nearest boulder, wondering if I’ll feel guilty when the Harbinger is finally able to make good on its vow to avenge us. I don't think I will. In fact, I make a promise to myself that I will not feel remorse when those who’ve hurt me get what’s coming to them. Some things can’t be forgiven and some things are deserved.
‘There’s something else,’ it says. ‘I’m not sure if it’s important, but the map that Grey showed you ...’
‘What about it?’
‘I’ve remembered ... I’m sure I’ve been there, but I don’t recall much else.’
‘Keep trying,’ I say, squeezing its hand. ‘I know it’s taking time, but things do seem to be coming back here and there.’
It snorts. ‘It needs to happen faster if we’re to destroy that cunt and escape this fucking place.’
‘Can you feel the Dark Realms? Is it closer to finding the fold?’
‘I don’t know. I can’t sense it now.’ Letting out a small sigh, it looks up at the void of the sky. ‘It could be that I’ll know it’s close only when it’s almost here.’
‘So we might not have much time to get the fae out of the fold before it’s too late.’
‘I’m sorry,’ it says. ‘I’ve been reaching for it, but I think it’s hiding itself from me somehow.’
‘It’s not your fault,’ I sigh, looking out at the Black Lake.
I frown as I notice a flash of color, something that I haven’t seen here before. I thought I’d noticed everything during the countless hours I’ve spent with the Harbinger.
‘What is this?’ I ask, leaning forward to look at it. But I already know from the hue.
My eyes widen. It's a flower growing out of a crevice in the rock beside us. It’s one of the flowers.
I look at the Harbinger, and it shrugs.
‘Have you ever seen one of these here before?’
It peers down at the yellow flower with me, its face next to mine.
‘In all the years I've been here with you and this place inside your mind has been my home, nothing has ever grown.’
‘It's one of the flowers that Kal brings me. Why would it be here? Is my mind making this happen? Is it because I keep thinking about them?’
The Harbinger stares at the flower. Then, it reaches out and carefully brushes its fingertips against the petal. It shivers.
‘I like it,’ it says quietly. ‘There's something about it.’
I look at it sharply. ‘Yes,’ I say. ‘Something about it is ... important.’
It nods thoughtfully.
‘I think you should ... keep them close to you. When you’re awake, I mean. I think they’re helping us.’
‘Helping us how?’
Its eyes don’t leave the small plant. ‘I had been getting weaker, as you know. This binding saps my strength with every moment. I thought I might not ... have long before I faded away.’
‘It’s that strong?’ I exclaim. ‘Why didn’t you tell me? I could have ... told Varrik. He doesn’t want you gone . Perhaps he would have changed it.’
‘You think he’d have believed a deceitful human ?’ It gives me an incredulous look. ‘We each have our ... trials here. I didn’t want to add to yours. But since Kallum has been bringing the flowers, the conjure isn’t affecting my power as much.’
‘I’ll keep them close then,’ I promise, but I can see it barely hears me, its attention taken completely by the little yellow flower in front of it that it’s gently caressing.
We stay like that for a long time before I’m drawn back into the waking world with the sun.
Dane is next to me on the bed when I open my eyes. He's early. I suppose he wants to get it out of the way. He doesn't say a word. He just raises my nightgown and spreads my legs, settling between them. He pushes in gently, and I find that, for once, I'm already wet for him. He also takes me calmly. Slowly. Gently. His gaze doesn’t leave my face, and I don't like it.
I'd rather he turned me over and ignored me than whatever this is. It’s as if he's making love to me, but that's not right because he doesn't love me.
He loves Fiana.
I try not to look into his eyes even when he cups my face and surges forward. Even when he becomes frustrated that I'm not looking at him in whatever way he wants me to.
My muscles ache from Fiana’s favored pain conjures, but I don’t show it. It’s not as if anyone can do anything to help. Next to Varrik, Fiana might be the strongest Skilled in the Fold as I can’t really count the Harbinger at the moment. I can just imagine Dane’s incredulous reaction if I said something about her visits as well.
When Dane is finished, he pulls my clothes down to hide me from his view again. He looks at me pensively.
‘Did Kal tell you about the amulet?’ he asks.
I nod.
‘I’m trying to sort through Varrik’s wards to see if I can find a way to use the Gate without his permission.’
My eyes search his. I didn’t realize he was trying to actively help still. Since Fiana got back, I assumed he didn’t have the time.
‘How did you do it when you escaped before? I know you used it. You must have made it work for you. How?’
‘I don’t know,’ I answer, a brittle laugh bubbling up at his disbelieving expression. ‘The Harbinger did it.’
Does he think I’m lying?
‘If I knew exactly how it did it, don’t you think I’d tell you? I went in. I set the fire. I willed the Gate to open, and the Harbinger made it so.’
‘I didn’t mean to imply that you weren’t telling the truth. I’m sorry, Lia,’ he says quietly, and then he turns toward the door without waiting for a response.
But as he passes the table, he knocks the pile of books on it, and a piece of paper flutters to the floor. He picks it up and frowns at it.
‘What is this?’
I flaunt Fiana’s rules as I get out of bed. She never comes while Dane is still here anyway. I look at the paper.
‘Just the map that Grey and Kal found in Varrik’s study the other night. I don’t think it’s a way out of here, and without the key, we don’t know where it is or where it leads.’
I realize that he hasn’t seen it yet. We haven’t all been together since Fiana returned. I was going to show it to him, but ... ‘It slipped my mind.’
He stares at it, and his brows rise. ‘I think ...’ He glances at me. ‘This is the Light Realm, Lia.’ He sounds in awe. ‘I’m sure of it.’
I look down at the parchment. ‘So ... the Light Realm is the place to start?’ I shake my head. ‘But then where does it go? And what’s the point of it? The Light Realm is impossible to get to. Why would he care about this?’
‘He wouldn’t,’ Dane mutters. ‘Not unless he already had a way to get to the Light Realm first.’
He looks down at me, his expression unreadable. ‘You’d be safe there. Once we can find a way out of the fold, Grey and Kal could take you there.’
‘But ... we can’t get out of the Fold,’ I say quietly. ‘Remember? What use is this?’
He takes my hand gently, seeming to make a decision. ‘You can’t get out yet, but you will. And when you do, that’s where you’ll go.’
My knees weaken at his touch, even as I reel at his words.
You. Not us. The thought of him not coming makes me turn away from him lest he sees my upset and guesses the reason.
He gives my fingers a squeeze, and it feels more real than anything else we’ve been forced to do in this room.
‘I vow it,’ he whispers and lets me go.
He gets to the door and gives the room a final sweep, his eyes lingering on the mirror again and giving it a frown before he leaves without another word.
I get back into bed and stay there until Fiana comes. She’s alone, and, for once, she doesn’t stay to torment me. She seems preoccupied and on edge. To my relief, once she sees where I am, she leaves again quickly and without speaking to me.
After that, I get dressed in another gown and look through the latest tomes Kallum brought me. One of them is a book on flowers, which I’m guessing he picked because of our conversation the other day. I don't find the yellow one, but its pink counterpart is drawn in detail. The faerie flower of the healers about is painted in all its glory. The section gives its uses and where it can be found. The book itself looks quite old, but there's no mention of the flower ever being yellow. It’s exactly the same except for that, though.
I can’t help but think that if its sister, the pink flower, is so potent, then perhaps the yellow one is as well. But maybe in a different way. Maybe that’s why it’s healing the Harbinger.
I open the drawer where I keep them safe and I put one in my palm, staring at it for a long time. Almost without thinking, I put it in the bust of my dress next to my skin.
It just seems like the right thing to do.
Grey
We stalk the cunt through the woods. I haven't shifted, but I can still hear him lumbering around up ahead, and I grin as I glance at Kallum, who's also smiling wide. He looks unhinged in the moonlight, and I know he's letting all his frustrations out tonight.
We’re at another dead end. The amulet didn’t work. We can’t leave the fold without Varrik’s leave unless the Harbinger is unbound. Even Dane can’t get past the wards he’s woven into the very stone of both the main ring and his own private one that he uses almost exclusively now. I noticed that even the Fold’s supply delivery from the Dark Realms came through the keep as if the main Gate is unusable for some reason. There’s a reason for it, I’m sure, but no one knows anything nor thinks much of it. Varrik simply doesn’t use the main Gate anymore.
I draw my attention back to the hunt. I’m letting my own aggravations out as well. Perhaps this is why these outings are quickly becoming an addiction for me.
I think back to the shifter guard Kal picked out in the hallway as one who’d harmed our female. I’d stalked him through these very trees the other night. The memory is a bit hazy, though, as it was the beast doing the pursuing. But we watched him, waited for him to shift, and then we followed him. We trailed the cowardly fuck for a while, playing with him, letting him smell us. It turned out he was just a lowly wolf. No match for me and the beast.
He tried to survive, but in the end, I held him down and forced him to shift back so that I could look him in his fae eyes and tell him why we were doing this before we ripped out his throat. His fear and the scent of the blood in the air were powerful, but they weren't enough to sate my anger, which is why Kal and I are out here again so soon. I’d kill them all, every single one who’s laughed at her, hurt her, or stood by and watched it happen. She would save them when we leave.
She doesn’t have to know how many we destroy for her.
This guard is no shifter, but Kallum, who had a drink with him in the pub, found out that his skill is at a very low level before he drugged him. Then we dragged him out here far from the village and left him to regain consciousness so that we could hunt him together. We watched him wake from our vantage point on the ridge above him. The fool looked around, noticed his boots were missing, and shook his head ruefully, muttering to himself about getting too drunk. Then, he began ambling in the direction of the village, having no idea of the danger he was in.
My grin widens as he turns and still doesn’t see us. I chuckle darkly, glad I’m the one holding the reins this time instead of the beast because this one’s mine.
It's not often I let myself give in to the darkness inside me, but there’s no better reason than avenging Lia.
This will only be the second one I've taken down, and it irks me that I can’t reap all of them. I know I won't be able to get another for a few days at least. It'll be too suspicious while we’re still no closer to finding a way out, and I can't help Lia if I'm locked away for murder. I’ll have to wait. For now.
I wonder how we're going to make this one look like an accident. We decided earlier that's how it should appear.
As if finally sensing us, he begins to move faster through the terrain, stumbling and cursing his bare feet, and I almost wish that Kal had left him his boots so he’d give us more of a chase.
We flank him and I see him emerging from the wood onto the crest of the hill. The village is still some distance away, so we aren’t worried that he’ll somehow make it back there before we can take him down, but my patience is at an end.
‘I want to take him now,’ I growl.
Kal’s answering grin tells me he agrees, and we start towards our prey a little faster.
‘Don't shift,’ Kal says, his smile widening. ‘I want him to see us both coming.’
‘What did this one do specifically?’ I ask him so I know what level of pain to make him feel before the end.
Kal’s eyes narrow. ‘This one likes to look at her with lust in his eyes while she sleeps,’ he snarls.
We’re close enough now, and Kallum lunges, catching the guard by his tunic and roughly pulling him around to face us.
The guard’s eyes are wide, and his hands are up. But when he sees who we are, he visibly relaxes.
‘I don't know what happened,’ he splutters, ‘but I woke up out here without my boots. I don't know where the village is. Thank the gods you found me.’
He thinks we're here to help him.
‘I wouldn’t thank them just yet.’ I laugh loudly.
Kal pushes him down the small hill, making him fall with a soft cry that makes my lip curl in derision. He rolls the rest of the way down it, and we stay where we are, looking down our noses at him in perfect imitations of Dane. I don’t even need to pretend my disgust.
‘If you can make it to the village, we won’t kill you,’ Kallum says softly.
The guard’s expression morphs from annoyance to confusion to fear in seconds. He turns and runs.
‘I was going to draw it out a bit longer,’ Kal murmurs, ‘but he’s not really worth the time. I think I’d like to kill him now and then look in on Lia.’
‘Agreed.’
I launch myself off the side of the hill, and I catch him, knocking the wind out of him as he hits the rough ground hard.
‘What do you want with me?’ he practically wails.
Pathetic. He’s not worthy to even be in our female’s presence.
‘Tell me,’ Kal says, crouching down next to the guard and me. ‘Did you touch what was ours, or just put your worthless eyes all over her?’
The guard just stares. ‘I don't know what you mean. I haven't touched anything of yours.’
‘Lia,’ I snarl, lifting him up and banging his head against the ground.
‘Who?’ he groans, grimacing in pain.
‘The Harbinger.’
His eyes widen. ‘I haven't touched her,’ he pleads. ‘I swear it.’
Kallum leans in closer. ‘I saw you looking at her. I heard what you said. So tell me the truth. Did you harm her? Were you one of the guards who tortured her in the dungeon? Did you put your hands on her in any way?’ Kal’s tone hardens further. ‘Did you wait until she slept and fondle her? It’s all right. The powerful Harbinger reduced to a beautiful, vulnerable human is quite the temptation. I know I enjoy playing with her while she slumbers.’
His eyes widen still further. ‘No! I didn't do any of that.’
Kallum draws back and eyes me.
‘What did you do?’ I snarl in the guard’s face, gratified when he cringes away.
‘Nothing! I followed my orders. That’s all!’
I grab him by his scrawny neck and haul him to his feet.
I grin at Kal. ‘I want to make it hurt.’
Kal snorts. ‘As do I, but there will be others, and we do need to make this one look like an accident.’
‘You won't get away with this,’ the guard wheezes. ‘Varrik?—’
‘Varrik?’ Kal scoffs. ‘Varrik won't care that you're dead. He doesn't care about any of us, you fool.’
‘That's not true!’
Rolling his eyes, Kal scoffs. ‘This is practically a mercy. We’re putting this poor cunt out of his misery, and he doesn't even know it.’
He looks at the guard like he's nothing.
‘Pathetic.’
‘They’ll notice I'm gone. They'll look for me.’ The guard tries.
I snort. ‘And they’ll find you,’ I tell him, an idea quickly coming to me. ‘At the bottom of the back steps in the keep.’
‘Everyone knows you do your rounds that way later,’ Kal adds with a grin.
The guard looks between us, terror overtaking his features.
‘You can’t do this!’ he yells. ‘You’re going to kill me? A fae ?! Over some human bitch?’
I hear the crack as Kallum breaks his neck, and I snarl at him.
‘He was mine!’
‘I couldn’t listen to any more of his drivel. Could you?’ Kal sounds bored. ‘I hope the next one is more entertaining than this.’
I let out a noise of displeasure but say no more about it. I will get the next one. The beast agrees.
‘Let’s get him to the keep,’ I say with a huff, and Kal nods.
I hoist him up over my shoulder, and we begin walking side by side back through the forest.
‘Which one shall we take next?’
I side-eye him. ‘We can’t do another one yet. We’ll have to wait. Besides, we need to put our energies into coming up with a plan.’
Kal looks long-sufferingly at me. ‘Fine, but I am going to get revenge on the guards for Lia even if we don’t do it here.’
I shrug. ‘The guards, the servants, the elites. The Harbinger had the right of it when she escaped the first time and tried to destroy the keep, but she wasn’t thinking big enough. I think you and I should get rid of them all.’
Kal glances at me in surprise. ‘Finally,’ he says after a moment.
‘Finally what?’
‘A Grey I can stand behind.’
I laugh in spite of myself. ‘It’s settled then. No more one-offs. If we truly want to avenge our female, we take them all at once.’
Kallum shakes his head and lets out a sigh. ‘She already told me she wants to save them all.’
‘I know.’ I make a sound of disgust, and Kallum looks commiserating.
‘She thinks that if it’s Varrik’s skill to make them love him, then she can’t blame them for what they do to her.’
I snarl. ‘That’s ridiculous.’
I think it through for a bit in silence as we trudge through the trees and I make a face. I’d love nothing more than to kill each one slowly while I told them their crimes, but if saving them is what my female wants …
‘Fine,’ I say with a sigh. ‘I’m willing to compromise. We won’t kill the servants and the lower Skilled, but the guards and the elites can’t be allowed to leave the fold. Their crimes against her are too severe.’
Kallum nods. ‘We leave nothing to chance where she’s concerned.’
We walk along for a few moments in silence. ‘We also still need to decide where we’re going to take her when we leave,’ Kal says with an annoyed look. ‘I can’t believe Varrik has no map books at all.’
I sniff. ‘Need to figure out how we’re going to leave first, I think.’
Kallum puts his arm on my shoulder as we reach the edge of the forest, and we disappear.
‘I know,’ Kal says. ‘I just wonder if we should decide on our destination and work backward from there. Perhaps it’ll help us to think ... differently about it. Come up with another idea.’
‘Fine. In the absence of any map books, any thoughts from memory?’ I ask, not breaking my stride.
‘Not from memory. There’s only one place I would take her,’ he answers.
He doesn’t say it, but I know he means the Light Realm, a place we can’t get to.
We don’t talk anymore as we skirt the village and make our way into the keep. We leave the guard on the floor at the bottom of the cracked stone steps. It’s not the first time there’s been an accident here, so we should be in the clear.
‘It’s a pity we won’t be able to do this again tomorrow night,’ he says as he belatedly pushes the guard’s boots back on and then pours half a flagon of wine over him that he then places strategically on the floor close by.
I nod. ‘But we'll get them all.’
‘Aye. Every single one who hurt our female.’
I hear voices coming closer, and I put my hand on his shoulder again. We blink out of sight.
‘I want to do some scouting while we’re up here,’ Kal says in my ear.
I roll my eyes. I suppose I’m tagging along then because he doesn’t give me the option of not.
Kal takes us through walls. We watch servants working and listen to their chatter. I get some more names to add to my list of people who are being cruel to my Harbinger or speaking ill of her. Even though we aren’t meant to be killing any of them anymore until it’s time to go, I decide that if I do get any chances, I’ll take them.
In truth, I’m not glad that some of these cunts will survive. As far as I can tell, most of them deserve to die, even though they're ignorant about Varrik and his true nature. None of them, bar that healer, Jak, have even tried to be kind to our female. None have shown her any decency at all.
We make our way around level by level, going through rooms and listening to conversations.
When we reach the hall where the elites are, I watch narrow-eyed as Dane leaves the Harbinger’s room after performing his duties to Varrik for the second time today. We haven’t talked about what we’ll do about Dane if anything. He was one of us, after all. He’s saved our lives more than once as we’ve saved his. But if he still blindly loves Varrik as much as that guard did by the time we kill the fae lord and leave, there won’t be any other way than to get rid of him like the others.
We’re about to go to Lia’s room when we see Fiana coming down the hall slowly.
We haven’t seen much of her at all since she’s been back, I realize. Not even in Dane’s company. I almost snort aloud. Well, not after his cock didn’t work at any rate!
‘They aren’t together much,’ Kal says under his breath, his remark echoing my thoughts. ‘I've barely seen them together at all except for at the banquet the other night when we saw Dane fail to fuck her.’
I don't know what to make of it. As far as I knew, Dane couldn't wait to see Fiana. Surely, if they both felt thus they'd be spending a lot more time with each other. But perhaps after Dane couldn’t perform ...
We watch her enter her room, and Kallum follows. We go through the cold wall as quietly as we can, and we find her drinking tea at her small table. There's a knock on her door.
‘Come,’ she says.
It's Vern.
She stands and gives him the first genuine smile I've seen since she returned.
‘I missed you,’ he says. ‘I hate seeing you with that cunt.’
She titters, but it sounds a little forced to my ears, though Vern doesn’t seem to notice. She kisses his lips, and my hand clenches around Kallum’s shoulder.
Fuck.
‘I know. I’ve missed you as well,’ she murmurs. ‘I promise you it won’t be for much longer.’
He makes a noise of derision. ‘Wish I could just kill him and be done.’
‘We can’t draw Varrik’s attention like that,’ Fiana huffs. ‘Besides, Dane is stronger than he appears. It’s just until we go. Perhaps I can try again to undo that silly love conjure I put him under. Maybe then he’ll stop following me around like a pup.’ She rolls her eyes. ‘If I’d known how difficult the fucking thing would be to reverse, I’d never have chosen him to practice it on in the first place! Oh, the folly of youth!’
Did she just admit to...? My mouth falls open.
Fuck!
‘I could just kill him,’ Vern murmurs in her ear. ‘Then you wouldn’t have to worry about him anymore. I could make it look like an accident.’
I clench my fists at their flippant words. Was Dane’s unwavering love for Fiana simply the result of a conjure all along?
Fiana smiles at Vern. ‘He may yet be of use to us,’ she murmurs as she holds him to her, her expression turning longsuffering when he can no longer see her face.
We stand in the corner and try not to let our breathing be heard. Luckily, neither of them are shifters, so their ears aren’t as good as mine.
‘How long until we can be gone from here?’ he asks.
‘Soon, my love,’ Fiana whispers. ‘Soon, you’ll have me all to yourself.’
She kisses him again. ‘Gods, I can’t wait for the day that we don’t have to serve that cunt anymore.’
Vern snorts. ‘You better not let anyone hear you talking about Varrik that way. Not yet.’
She smirks. ‘I don’t care if they do. It’s not going to matter for very long.’
Vern draws back. ‘What will you do about Dane? I’m sick of him hanging around you. I barely see you,’ he complains again.
Fiana rolls her eyes. ‘I could do without him here,’ she murmurs, ‘but he won’t be a problem once it’s time to leave. He’ll never find us. We just need him to breed the piggy first.’
Vern sniggers. ‘Hasn’t he done it yet?’
She shrugs. ‘It should be soon. Skith says we’re nearing her most fertile days. Once the seed has taken, I’ll keep her as my slave until she births my babe.’
‘No one will comment on it?’ Vern asks doubtfully.
‘I’ve read all Varrik’s books on the Fae Court’s customs. It was common not long ago for the fae to keep humans for breeding as their numbers began to diminish. No one will remark on it, and if they do,’ she laughs, ‘I’ll have the Harbinger kill them.’
‘You have it all planned so well, my love,’ Vern murmurs, pulling her dress up and surging into her. ‘Gods, I adore you!’
She lets out a loud moan, and I turn away in revulsion, thanking Kallum silently as he takes the initiative and leads us from the room quickly.
Kallum is silent as we make our way to Lia’s door and go inside.
Our female is asleep in her bed and doesn’t wake up, so we keep our voices low.
We regard each other for a few moments before Kal breaks the silence.
‘Dane. She ... That bitch!’ he hisses. ‘She fucking made him care for her with magick. How long ...?’
‘It could have been since the very beginning,’ I mutter. ‘We can’t leave him.’
Kal shakes his head. ‘No. Do you think it’s like Varrik’s Skill? Might it ... wear off?’
‘Well, it didn’t seem to waver all those years in Alcana, not until Lia ...’
‘Until Rondorai,’ Kal finishes. ‘When we got closer to her.’
I nod.
I let out a breath. ‘They’re planning to leave, so they must have a way out. We need to find out what their plan is.’
‘And we can steal it,’ Kal says, eyes gleaming in anticipation.
‘Yes.’
‘They mentioned fae courts. I thought we were the last of our kind. Where could they be going?’
I shake my head. ‘I don’t care. But we need to make sure they don’t take Lia with them.’
‘They won’t,’ Kal says with a sneer. ‘They want her with child, and she drinks that tea Dane brings her every day without fail. We have time, or maybe they’ll simply go without her when she isn’t breeding by the time they need to leave.’
At Kal’s sniggering words, the color drains from my face as my mind begins to connect the dots.
‘Fuck,’ I whisper, my eyes finding Lia sleeping in the bed.
It can’t be so!
I didn’t see it. How could I not have seen it?
‘What is it?’ Kal looks uneasy as he notices my expression. ‘What’s the matter?’
‘The tea,’ I say. ‘The fucking tea . We saw her switch the jars. We just had no idea what she was doing.’
‘What do you mean? Who? ... No !’ Kal breathes. ‘Dane would have noticed, he’d have?—’
He breaks off as I stalk silently over to the bed and lean over Lia, taking in the smell of her deeply. It’s early. Only a day or two at most, but the scent is unmistakable.
My eyes cut to Kal, who blanches.
‘It’s too late,’ I whisper. ‘She’s bred.’