Chapter 4
Chapter
Four
Jayne
“I don’t want you to go to work.” My seven-year-old sister’s sad little voice breaks my heart.
My internship isn’t optional, though. If I don’t do it, I won’t graduate, and getting my master’s degree is the goal.
“You’ll be at school while I’m working on Mondays and Wednesdays, so it’s just Tuesdays and Thursdays where you’ll miss me.”
“But who’s going to do my numbers with me?” she whispers.
God knows, her mother has the patience of a two-year-old hyped up on sugar. Not to mention, Lourdes probably doesn’t even know how to do basic math. She certainly doesn’t have the ability to teach someone else if she does.
“And you always quiz me for my spelling tests on Thursday nights!” There are tears in Lindy’s eyes and it guts me, but I have responsibilities and the internship is a mandatory part of the graduation requirements.
“We can study on Wednesday night,” I suggest gently.
Tears fill her eyes. “But we always do it on Thursdays.”
She’s not my child, so I usually have plenty of patience but today it’s taking a lot not to snap at her.
We’ve been having this conversation for a couple of weeks but tomorrow is my first day and she’s on the verge of melting down.
If that happens, and Lourdes notices, she’ll probably spank her, which is the last thing I want.
“Listen,” I say softly, pulling her onto my lap. “It’s going to be fine. And maybe sometimes you can come to work with me, when school is out or on Saturdays when they have story time. I promise I’ll make plenty of time for you.”
“You’re working Saturdays too?” she cries in distress.
“Only one Saturday a month, for story time. And that’s when you can come with me.”
“Okay.” She nestles against my chest, sighing much more deeply than a seven-year-old should. But her life is complicated for a kid her age.
She’s normally a pretty even-tempered child, but the move has been hard on her.
And her parents either haven’t noticed or don’t care.
I figure it’s the former with my dad and the latter with Lourdes—all Lourdes cares about is parading her around like a living little doll and showing her off at the pageants.
“Now get into bed, and I’ll read to you.”
“Are you riding to school with me?”
I always ride with her on the first day of school, and luckily the private academy Dad and Lourdes enrolled her in is on the way to the library.
“Of course.” I pull the covers up as she gets into bed and I pull out the book we’re currently reading—The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe by C.S.
Lewis. It was my favorite as a child and she’s completely enthralled with it too.
My mother read it to me every night before bed, just like I’m doing for Lindy.
We read two chapters before she starts getting sleepy, and I softly close her door behind me as I pad back to my own room.
The only good thing about this move is that my room is pretty incredible. It’s en suite, so I have my own bathroom with a massive shower and a soaking tub, a walk-in closet, and even a fireplace.
My dad is the head coach for the new expansion professional hockey team here, the Atlanta Thunder, so he’s gone all out with optics.
From the ridiculously large house to an SUV that cost more than a hundred grand to the trophy wife and angelic little girl.
Granted, he had the wife and child before this job came along, but this was always the goal—coaching in the big leagues.
The day he signed his contract is the happiest I’ve seen him since my mom died, which is saying a lot.
If I’m honest, I’m actually kind of excited about his job as well.
Especially the prospect of going to the games.
I love hockey and before she died, Mom and I used to watch all of Dad’s games.
In those days he coached at the college level, and we went to every home game.
He was different then, laid back and happy.
When he wasn’t married to a manipulative bitch.
The change in him was almost immediate once he met Lourdes, and it ramped up exponentially when she got pregnant. I don’t believe he wanted a baby at his age, which was his late forties then, but he married her and did the right thing.
But it changed him and not for the better.
Once Lourdes got her claws into him, I quickly became an afterthought.
I had a roof over my head and my basic needs met but neither of them had time for me.
By the time I was ready for college, I couldn’t wait to get the hell out of there and I probably wouldn’t have moved home afterwards if not for Lindy.
Dad offered to pay for grad school, though, so it was an offer I couldn’t refuse.
In spite of that, the father I knew no longer exists and I’ve given up on having any kind of meaningful relationship with him. No matter how many times I’ve tried to talk to him, he doesn’t listen or see how Lourdes has changed him.
Hockey was always his priority—Mom and I were afterthoughts to an extent—but with Lourdes, it’s like she has him under some kind of trance.
I hate her and now I’m counting down the days until I get my degree.
I’ve been putting away money since I turned eighteen, just a little here and there because I don’t know if my father will give me anything to help me get started in life.
I have some of my mother’s jewelry so I can pawn it if I have to, but I’d prefer not to—it’s all I have left of her other than pictures and memories.
In the meantime, all I have to do is keep my head down and—a notification on my phone startles me and I see it’s the dating app I recently signed up for.
I don’t know what came over me to do that but even though I’m attractive enough, I’m both nerdy and busy, so meeting men has never been a priority for me.
I figured this would be a safe enough way to at least dip a toe in the dating waters.
I like this app because it’s completely anonymous and the rules of engagement are kind of cool.
It’s called Blind Love, and you can’t exchange pictures or any personal information unless and until you want to.
I had one guy reply to my profile last week but as soon as we started talking he wanted to see a picture and I basically swiped left.
The whole point is to connect without being distracted by looks, so why is he immediately demanding to see pictures?
Today, someone new has sent me a message.
Broderick M.
brODERICK: Hey, Jeannie. I saw your profile and wanted to say hi. I’m twenty-five and live in the suburbs of Atlanta. If you’re interested, say hello.
Hmmm.
I used my mother’s name instead of my own just for an added layer of security since friends I haven’t talked to since high school have been crawling out of the woodwork once Dad got hired by the Thunder.
Someone interested in me solely because of my dad’s involvement in hockey is the last thing I need in my life.
That’s one of the reasons I joined a brand-new dating app.
And I like that Broderick is local, even though with traffic, it seems like anything outside of Peachtree Heights is an hour’s drive.
But I’ll be driving soon enough. At least, that’s my hope.
I chew the inside of my cheek for a moment and then start typing out a response.
JEANNIE: Hi, Broderick. Nice to “meet” you. I’m twenty-three and moved to the Atlanta suburbs about a month ago. I’m in college getting my master’s and like long walks on the beach.
Let’s see if he has a sense of humor.
brODERICK: LOL You know it’s about a four-hour drive to the nearest beach from Atlanta, right? But if that’s your favorite thing to do, we can definitely make the drive over to Tybee Island at some point if we decide to meet in person.
JEANNIE: I was kidding, but that’s sweet.
brODERICK: What brought you to Atlanta? School?
JEANNIE: Actually, no. I moved with the family since I’m living at home while I finish my degree. What about you?
brODERICK: I came here for work.
I don’t want to get too personal too soon, so I shift the conversation.
JEANNIE: What do you think of ATL so far?
brODERICK: I like the cost of living—the traffic and humidity, not so much.
JEANNIE: Same. Luckily, my commute from my bed to my desk is pretty short. Most days anyway.
brODERICK: I wish mine was that short!
JEANNIE: Is your job downtown?
brODERICK: No, it’s in Alpharetta, so it won’t be too bad.
JEANNIE: We’re practically neighbors! I’m in Peachtree Heights.
brODERICK: Holy shit, me too! If we decide we want to meet in person, this makes things a lot easier.
JEANNIE: To be honest, I’m not sure how this is supposed to work. I understand that the concept is to get to know each other before we decide to meet, but I’ve never been on any kind of dating app before.
brODERICK: Me either. I figured I’d give it a try since I’m in a new city and will be busy with work starting in a few weeks.
Plus, the anonymity was interesting to me.
No photos. No details other than age and state we live in.
Most of my past relationships have been one-night stands, if I’m honest.
JEANNIE: That’s kind of the opposite of me—I’ve never had a one-night stand.
brODERICK: Nothing wrong with that. I’ve just been sowing oats, I guess.
JEANNIE: And now you’re ready for something more?
brODERICK: With the right woman, I think so. I’ve been working on myself this summer. Seeing a therapist.
JEANNIE: Can I be honest with you?
brODERICK: Sure.
JEANNIE: I’m kind of nerdy. And most guys are turned off by it.