Chapter 9 Jaylynn #2
“I just didn’t realize…” She trails off as Dad gets to his feet, wrapping me in a hug before clapping Penn on the back hard enough to make him rock a little.
“Good to see you, son.” I don’t miss the way Penn swallows, like the word ‘son’ hit a soft spot. I’m guessing it did. “Been hearing good things. You’ve been hard-hitting…” Dad stops, a flash of embarrassment crossing his face. “…hard-hitting player. On the boards…on the team, I mean.”
Yeah, sure he’s not going to bring up the hard-hitting Penn’s been doing outside of the rink—with Santa and possibly his daughter, but in different ways. Crap, now my cheeks are blushing.
“Thanks, Coach.” Penn grins, then shakes his head. “I mean, Mr. Quinn.”
Dad barks a laugh. “You can call me Will.”
“Right. Will.” Penn chuckles and then clears his throat. “I don’t know why that sounds so weird.”
“You’ll get used to it.” Dad steers him further into the room, “Come meet everyone.” Uncle Jack and Aunt Maureen stand. “We’re all putting together a fun, festive hockey game out on the pond tomorrow. I’m sure they’d all love it if you join us. Jaxon is home and he’ll be playing too.”
For a moment, I lose sight of him in the swirl of family bodies, the buzz of conversation shifting around his tall frame. I stay where I am, surrounded by Mom and Bella, when my other sister-in-law, Katy, comes hustling over. Her eyes are wide, her voice pitched in a scandalized whisper.
“You’re with Penn?”
I can feel Penn’s gaze from across the room, and the weight of it makes my next breath hitch, because his eyes look like they’re silently asking if that’s true, if what’s going on between us is more than just for show.
But that’s silly. We’re different people who want different things.
I am not looking for a relationship and neither is he.
We’re doing this for a purpose, so here goes…
“Uh… yeah. I’m with Penn.”
“Like with with…?”
“I’m not sure what ‘with with’ means, but if you’re asking if we,” I pause and shoot Mom a glance.
This isn’t awkward…much. “If we’re ah, romantically involved, then yes.
” Look at that. Not a lie, which is probably why it so easily slipped from my lips.
I knew sleeping together was a good idea. It makes pretending so much easier.
That, and it totally rocked my world.
As Dad drapes an arm across Penn’s shoulders—just like he’s done countless times on the ice—I find myself watching them.
Penn moves easily among my family, greeting each person with that practiced, easy smile.
But beneath it, I catch glimpses of something softer.
Something almost…hungry. It hits me then.
Penn could use a man like my dad in his life—outside the rink.
My brothers, Oliver and Conrad, are more the academic types.
They played hockey, sure, but not at a level that ever brushed against the NHL.
Not that Dad was disappointed—well, maybe a little.
And maybe for the next two weeks, Penn can be the NHL-playing son Dad never had.
The thought settles in me like warm hot chocolate.
I think that could be very good for Penn. Maybe for Dad, too.
“Well,” Katy says suddenly, looping her arm through mine and giving me a playful shake. “On that note. You have to tell us everything.”
I blink back to the present and realize I’ve got three pairs of curious eyes—Katy’s, Bella’s, and Mom’s—trained squarely on me.
“Look at her,” Bella laughs. “She’s so into Penn she hasn’t even heard a word we’ve been saying.
“Okay, come on.” Mom waves her hand. “Now that everyone is here, time for a family photo.”
Across the room, Penn catches my gaze. That silent connection we’ve been building since we first ran into each other, since I first offered him my room—my bed—stretches between us. He’s not comfortable with being in the family portrait.
“Mom,” I begin. Heck, what am I supposed to say? Penn and I are pretending so he really shouldn’t be in the photo? Ugh.
Mom gathers us all up, and the next thing I know the timer on the camera is set and I’m tucked in beside Penn. His arm circles my waist, steady, but as unsure of this as I am.
After a dozen or so pictures, everyone disperses, and I glance up at Penn. When he nods, I know exactly what he’s thinking. It’s time to make our announcement. My heart starts pounding again as something tight and uneasy coils low in my stomach.
Guilt.
Damn. This is my family. I don’t want to deceive them. Not about something as big as this. Maybe we shouldn’t have pushed this to an engagement. The word only slipped out yesterday because Penn was trying to put Dylan in his place…for me.
The doorbell rings.
Speaking of Dylan.
Penn’s eyes narrowing slightly as he reads my expression. “You okay, Lynny?”
“Not funny.” My voice is quiet, almost lost in the buzz of Dylan and Sloane’s arrival.
Penn slides his arms around me again, pulling me into his warmth, and I shiver just enough for him to notice. I blink rapidly, my mind racing, my lips twisting.
“Hey,” he murmurs quietly. “What’s going on?”
“I just… I feel bad,” I admit, tilting my face up to his. “Maybe we shouldn’t say we’re engaged. Just boyfriend and girlfriend. It’ll make it easier when—”
The rest of my sentence is swallowed by a booming voice.
“Happy holidays!”
Every head turns as Dylan steps inside, brushing snow from his coat as Sloane trails in behind him. The smirk he sends me is all teeth and challenge, his gaze lingering far too long before he waves his finger between Penn and me and speaks again.
“Tell me I didn’t miss the big announcement?”
Penn’s arm tightens around my waist, his stance shifting, not just in defense, but in possession.
“Announcement?” Mom asks.
And just like that, any plans of backing out are ruined.