Chapter 30 #2
By the end, the entire audience has joined in, belting out the tune by heart.
When the song ends, the silence lasts for one perfect, breathless moment before the audience explodes into thunderous applause.
People leap to their feet, cheering and whistling for their kids, and through it all, Rourke stands center stage, beaming as he takes a final bow.
Then he turns, his gaze landing on me, and gives a final nod before heading off the stage.
When the curtain closes, I make my way through the crush of people, but it’s like trying to go through a traffic jam the wrong way.
I try to push toward him, but I’m immediately swarmed by Principal Callahan and David Peterson and what feels like half the audience—all wanting to congratulate me, take pictures, compliment me on the performance.
“Janie, that was absolutely incredible!” Mrs. Miller beams. “The best pageant we’ve ever had! And that leading man of yours—where did you find him? He was magical!”
“He’s pretty special,” I manage, craning my neck to look for Rourke over the crowd.
More parents surround me, and I try to be gracious, but my heart is pounding with the need to find him, to tell him how proud I am.
“Ms. Bennett!” Lily tugs on my dress. “Everyone wants pictures with you!”
I move to the cookie and punch reception in the foyer and pose for photo after photo, my smile growing more strained as the minutes tick by.
Where is Rourke?
That’s when I see Nick pushing through the crowd, and my stomach drops. I hadn’t even noticed him in the crowd.
“Janie!” He approaches with Lia right next to him, and there’s literally nowhere to hide.
“What are you doing here?” I ask.
“Lia wanted to see what all the fuss was about.”
Lia gives me a hesitant glance before tucking a strand of hair over her ear, her new diamond flashing in the light. “That was quite a show. Amazing what you did with those kids.”
“Thank you,” I say. “And congratulations on the engagement.”
She blinks, clearly surprised by the words, then fingers the ring absently. “Oh, thank you.”
Honestly, I’m shocked that I don’t feel the usual sting of betrayal. Instead, I feel nothing. And that’s the best thing I could feel given the circumstances. Because it means I’m finally healing.
“Where’s the hockey player?” Nick glances around the crowded foyer.
“Probably changing out of his costume.”
“Seeing how well you’re doing at this school, you probably should be careful.” He takes a sip of his punch. “I mean, having Rourke around so much…people talk, you know?”
Lia looks down at the floor.
“What are you saying, Nick?” I cross my arms, not hiding my irritation.
“I’m just trying to be helpful.”
“Helpful?” I huff out a laugh. “Is that what we’re calling this now?”
Nick’s jaw tightens. “Well, we should probably go.” He finishes off his punch. “And about Christmas…we’ve had a change of plans.”
My body stiffens. “What do you mean?”
“We’re heading to Aspen for Christmas. Lia found a great deal online.”
The words don't register at first. “But I thought…” I shake my head, trying to process what he’s saying. “…you wanted to see Aria on Christmas.”
He looks over at his fiancée. “Lia really wanted to take this trip. Besides, Aria doesn’t even know it’s Christmas, so she won’t miss me. It’ll be just like every other day of the year for her.”
For a second I think, I’ve misheard him. Then it all clicks. He never really cared about spending Christmas with his daughter.
I should call him out. Tell him what a real father would do. But all I feel is relief—and a deep sadness for Aria that her biological father cares so little.
“Thanks,” I say quietly.
“When we get back, let’s definitely talk about arrangements,” he says over his shoulder as he turns to go.
The custody fight isn’t over, but I have Christmas with my daughter. And suddenly, all I want is to share that with Rourke.
I push through the remaining crowd, looking for him.
“Hey, have any of you seen Mr. Rourke?” I ask a group of kids by the cookie table.
“He was back there a minute ago,” Jack says pointing down the hall where the dressing rooms are.
“I saw him leave,” Lily says, then she steps closer to me, her head tilting. “He looked like he was sneaking out.”
“Why do you think that?”
She shrugs. “I don’t know. He saw you talking with that man, and then he just turned around and left.”
I excuse myself from the kids and hurry toward the dressing rooms. When I reach Rourke’s, the door is ajar.
I walk into an empty dressing room and that’s when I see it—the costume folded neatly on the counter, all arranged for me. Beside it is an envelope with my name. I tear open the flap, scanning the paper quickly.
Janie,
The past few weeks with you and Aria have been the best of my life. Every memory we made—I’ll carry it with me, always.
I know you’re thinking about what’s best for Aria right now. You shouldn’t have to fight battles just because of who I am or what I come with.
You deserve everything good, angel. And I love you enough to get out of the way so you can have it.
Love, R
I stare at the paper, not understanding. What does he mean by getting out of the way?
“Janie?”
I whirl around to find Brendan in the doorway behind me.
“You came tonight?”
“Yeah, to support Rourke. Half the team showed up to support him.” He glances around the empty room. “I was supposed to get something he left behind.”
He reaches over and plucks a hair tie from the chair. I immediately recognize it.
“He didn’t want to lose it. Said it’s the only good luck charm he’s ever had.”
“My scrunchie,” I murmur. The one I wore the night we went to the arena. He slipped it around his wrist to hold it for me.
I take the scrunchie from him. “Do you know where he went?”
“He didn’t say goodbye?”
I shake my head. I don’t know what this means—what any of it means.
Brendan swallows. “He said he was leaving town for you.”
“Leaving? Why?”
“Uh…” Brendan shifts, clearly uncomfortable.
“Brendan, where is he?”
“I don’t know.”
I sink down onto the chair, still holding the note. In the distance, I can hear children laughing, parents chatting, the joy of a successful school event, while my own life falls apart.
Brendan’s brow knits. “He told me you were spending Christmas with Nick. Said it would be easier for you if he wasn’t here.”
I close my eyes. “It’s not easier. It’s unbearable.”
A pause stretches between us. “Do you want me to find out where he went?”
I nod, looking at the note for clues.
He reaches for his phone but glances at me first. “You know he’s trying to protect you, right? In the dumbest way possible.”
A half-laugh escapes me. “Yeah. Well. He forgot one thing.”
“What’s that?” Brendan asks.
“I don’t give up that easily.”