Chapter 7
Lenna
The touch of Jake’s palm against the back of her neck was infinitely worse than his grip on her throat.
Jake’s aggressive necklace of fingers around her throat reminded Lenna of his control and how he played the role of the ruthless, used-to-being-hated heir of the Organ Mandor until very recently.
Until he found out Hope existed and she was, in fact, the true heir, based on the female-leading blood dominance that the Cardinal goddesses had ensured when they created this land.
Once they reached the rail of the navia, the waves of the Radel Sea crashing against the metal underneath them, he let go of his firm hold on her throat and moved her red hair over one shoulder with one effective and brief movement.
Before she could blink, the palm of his hand was on the back of her neck.
That less aggressive touch of his palm was infinitely worse than his vicious grip on her throat.
It was a mandatory part of the magic to touch there when mouring someone else away.
It was not mandatory for it to hurt so fucking much, though.
The way this reminded Lenna of how he would look at her right before kissing her lips, of how his hand would be precisely there when he pressed her firmly against his body, of how his leather and ginger scent would fill every single cell inside of her…
Lenna couldn’t focus on anything or anyone else around Jake and her. Perhaps there were still sangins attacking them, perhaps not. Perhaps the sun had fallen from the sky and they were burning. Perhaps the others had started jumping out of the navia, mouring away to the safeplace.
She wouldn’t know, because her world had dramatically shrunk in a heartbeat.
All that existed were the silver eyes she used to lose herself in, right in front of her. They weren’t the same. They were cold, distant, unrecognizable.
Who was this stranger, and where was the man she fell in love with? Where was the man she was in love with?
Gone. Gone. Gone. He is gone.
She swallowed hard, keeping her feelings at bay as much as she could.
“Such a good girl when you want to be, aren’t you?” he muttered. Lenna didn’t have to react, reply, or even analyze what his words did to her, because Jake counted to three faster than any sensible person would, and they jumped into the sea.
The touch of his hand didn’t falter, and their surroundings blurred, circling around them at a vertiginous speed. The world was a blur, her heart was a mess, her body a wrench, and those piercing silver eyes were the only thing unmovable.
When their feet stomped against the marble floor of the Crystal Clear Safehouse Ciaran had built the Fifth knew when, Jake removed his hand and stormed away immediately.
He didn’t look back. Not as he shook his hand as if he was cleaning it with the air, as though Lenna was a personification of poison.
Lenna didn’t take her eyes off his back, and even when he left the living room, she continued staring at the empty door.
Her teeth hurt from how hard she clenched them.
She could be hurt and missing Jake so bloody much it could kill her, but who the fuck did this man think he was to treat her like this? This man was not her Jake, but an asshole.
Aggressiveness on his end, she could play with. She was well versed in playing aggressively in a variety of ways. But what was this game? Disgust? Abhorrence? As if she would let him get away with that.
Hope arrived a few meters away with Ciaran and Stevian, and Ayla followed shortly after with Nyraxa and another courtrade Lenna couldn’t remember the name of. The rest of the courtrades wouldn’t make it alive, probably. Sasha and Brendon hadn’t made it out alive either.
Her lungs seemed to tighten and get smaller with the image of both their bodies dismembered. Fuck, that hurt too much. Lenna didn’t want to break down again and spiral down a mental web of pain and sorrow. Not now. Not yet.
She was not ready to start dealing with grief in this capacity.
Instead, she’d rather use Jake’s dismissive attitude to wield her rage like the weapon she was used to mastering.
So, her fast steps stormed towards the corridor Jake had disappeared down, and his scent took her to the open patio at the back.
The potent scent of jasmine plants trailing up the walls of the patio mixed with his ginger scent, and the combination seemed almost perfect. Almost painfully perfect.
Jake was staring at a fountain, and even when the crystal door slammed behind Lenna, he didn’t turn. Not a hair moved, not a muscle flinched. Was he made of stone? Was his heart made of stone now?
She walked until she was in front of him, right between his body and the stone of the fountain touching the back of her knees. “Excuse me,” she said, her arms crossed in front of her as her chin lifted to look at him.
Jake narrowed his eyes, still staring at the fountain above Lenna’s head.
Nothing in his stance gave any sign of acknowledgment of her.
Was he back to ignoring her, then? Like he had been since the Fifth Judgment until a few minutes ago?
Sorry, not fucking sorry, but she would not let him go away from her that easily.
“I said, Excuse me,” she repeated, pursing her lips.
“Excuse you? You got in my way.”
“Bless the Fifth, he can talk.” She forced a smile, tilting her head sideways.
“That does not mean he wants to, he cares to, or he will.”
“Why the fuck did you shake your hand after touching me? Am I that dirty?”
Jake’s eyebrow lifted slightly, and the rush of satisfaction running through Lenna’s veins after causing him to react was no small thing. It was, in fact, a feeling that could become dangerously addicting.
“You are,” he said, finally looking down at her, running his silver stare from her hair to her toes. “Very, very dirty.”
Only then was Lenna remotely conscious of the sickening amount of dried blood on her clothes, on her skin, on her hair. None of it was her blood, yet she couldn’t allow herself to think whose blood that was. Not yet.
“You never seemed to mind how dirty I was before, Jake.” The way her voice trembled with his first name on her lips snapped something inside of her.
He inhaled deeply, his broad, muscled chest expanding in front of her. “The past is gone, Brachyan. There is no point in holding on to dead causes.”
How could his voice sound so neutral, so cold? How could two sentences slice someone’s heart so sharply?
Before she could reply, Jake stepped back a couple of steps, distancing himself from her.
While looking at the sky, he took a few deep breaths.
Lenna couldn’t take her eyes away from him.
Some strands of his black hair fell over his forehead.
His tight fists were visible across the pockets of his trousers.
Underneath his marked jaw, his throat bobbed as he swallowed.
“I’m leaving,” he finally said, looking down.
“Where are you going?” Her voice was broken, and she was mere seconds away from breaking down for good.
“I have a House to rule.”
“No, Jake. You have a life to live.”
Over his silver eyes flashed a glimpse of frozen devastation. “No, I don’t. Not anymore.”
And then, he moured away.
Gone.
Gone.
Gone.