Chapter 24 #2
“The next team to get two out of three questions correct will officially be our winners, folks!” DeSantos says. Genderfluid Frosty’s arms are thrown up in a V, and the bar explodes in cheers.
Then we get down to business.
“Where did the tradition of the Christmas tree originate?”
“Germany!” Audra shouts, practically jumping out of her seat.
“Nice work!” Izaac says, and high-fives his sister.
“I mean, I did study international relations for a semester,” she says, and blows on her nails.
“What three words are used to describe a grouchy green creature in the 1960s classic cartoon?”
“Stink, stank, stunk!” Krista shouts to DeSantos, who responds, “Su perb !”
“Told you… pure Grinch energy,” Eve mutters to me, and I can’t help smiling, even though it means we’re tied with the Vixens.
“Okay, last one. For all the marbles. In the category of Christmas music, can someone tell me what Frosty’s nose is made out of?”
I’m so impressed with the question, so tricky that it’s almost playing dirty, that I don’t get to the buzzer fast enough. Cash whacks the red button and shouts, “Carrot!”
My stomach drops. I know he’s wrong, but I don’t want to make him feel bad. It is a tough one.
“That is incorrect !” DeSantos says, and Krista smirks. It is so maddening.
“If the Vixens can nail this one, they will have the victory.”
Cash apologizes and Izaac rubs his back.
But then the Vixens look at one another, and to my great delight, Krista’s smug expression disappears, because it appears that they’re stumped too. The timer ticks down and before they can respond, it hits zero.
“No one? Okay. The correct answer is… a button! A corn cob pipe and a button nose.”
Cash slaps his forehead.
“It’s okay, my friend. Honest mistake,” I tell him. “We’re still tied!”
“Okay, everyone, this is the one for all the marbles. Or, probably more appropriately here, the pinballs. Which, incidentally, sounds like a very painful infection. But I digress. The final category is… Christmas movies.”
“Yesssss, you got this!” Izaac whisper-shouts to me.
I’ve already answered questions related to Christmas in Connecticut, Santa Claus: The Movie (not to be confused with The Santa Clause ), and the little-known Star Wars Holiday Special . But now the stakes are profoundly serious.
I take a breath and look out at the crowd. I’m painfully aware of Eve watching me. Not to mention her brother, her cousin, and an entire bar full of strangers. Plus, my own camera is still rolling on the table, recording my success or failure for posterity.
DeSantos lowers their voice for dramatic effect. “Okay, folks. In the 1992 feature-length classic The Muppet Christmas Carol , what does one Mister Kermit the Frog say is standing between him and Christmas?”
I can picture the scene, hear the opening bars of the song. I can practically smell the winter air that surrounded Kermit and those ice-skating penguins that night. But everyone looks to me and when I try to conjure up those lyrics… I freeze.
It feels just like my applications—when the pressure is on, something that should come so easily completely eludes me.
Like when it really counts, for some reason I can’t seem to pull it together.
My pulse quickens as I try to think. Because that just means you have to find another way, right? Or… learn to ask for help…
The air is thick with the pressure of the crowd’s gaze. The spotlights are white-hot. And ticktock ing is drowning out my own thoughts. At any moment, the Vixens could buzz and Eve’s ex could run away with the crown. I feel beads of sweat form on my forehead.
“I should know this,” Eve hisses. “We’ve watched that movie literally a million times!”
I see Hugo in the crowd, eyes glued to his sister, like he’s trying to transmit the answer into her mind. Maybe she got the message, because she starts to reach for the red button, but before she can press, the buzzer sounds from across the stage.
“Krista,” DeSantos says, their focus shifting to the Vixens’ table. “Do you have the correct answer for us?”
Eve sits back and runs a hand through her hair. I can’t tell if she’s relieved that she doesn’t have to try, or furious with herself for not acting faster.
Cash is tapping his foot like a rabbit on a sugar high and I’m holding my breath.
Krista nods proudly, then takes a deep, dramatic breath before leaning into the microphone.
“What is a visit from three spirits?”
“No,” I say, at the same time as Eve shouts, “No! That’s wrong!”
“Of course she thinks I’m wrong,” Krista says. “Next she’ll say I’m cheating.”
“Well, it wouldn’t be the first time,” Eve says now, loud enough for the mic to pick it up, and the crowd reacts with oooohhhhh s.
I feel extra motivated to snatch that crown if the implication is true.
“Okay, things are getting spicy!” DeSantos says, and looks between them, intentionally drawing out the suspense. Then, very slowly they give a verdict.
“But I’m sorry, Krista, Eve is correct that your answer is not correct.”
Cash, Diya, Audra, and Izaac cheer. But I’m silent, barely breathing.
“And once again, I just want to say that the answers do not need to be in the form of a question,” DeSantos adds before turning to us. “This goes to you now, Tannenbaums. If you answer correctly, the fruitcake crown is yours…”
Now Eve looks to me. It’s clear despite her reach for the buzzer that she still can’t remember.
But I do. The near loss has shaken me out of my freeze and now I can’t believe I almost forgot.
I know this answer like the back of my hand, like Gonzo knows the story he’s narrating.
This is it—my redemption for choking earlier.
Like some perfect movie script ending to this scene, I’m about to win this for us. For Eve.
But just as I’m about to answer, I look out into the crowd and the spotlight shifts just enough that I can make out a small, Victorian-looking figure in the distance.
Hugo is standing tall. He’s shaking his head and waving his arms wildly.
For a second I almost think he’s going to be the one to shout it out himself. I hesitate.
“Ticktock, Tannenbaums… Do you have the answer?” DeSantos asks. “Otherwise, we will have to move on to a new question.”
There’s no time to overthink it. “I’d like to phone a friend,” I blurt out.
“Wait, what?” Diya whispers.
“Are you saying you don’t know the answer?” Cash hisses.
I can feel Eve’s eyes on me, puzzled.
“Well, all right, then. Who here in the audience do you want to poll?” DeSantos asks.
I look right at Carlos, who’s looking back and nodding.
But what I say is, “Hugo.”
We wait with bated breath as Carlos turns to Hugo. He’s no longer waving his arms frantically; in fact, he’s standing as stiff as an icicle.
I feel Eve freeze too, but then Hugo slowly leans over, cups a hand around Carlos’s ear, and even though none of us can hear him, it’s clear her brother is…
speaking, because a grin explodes across Carlos’s face.
Eve’s breath hitches as Carlos listens, then he cups his own hands around his mouth so he can project a response to the stage.
“The correct answer is one more sleep!” Carlos calls.
The bar is silent.
DeSantos looks at their note card as if they’ve somehow forgotten the answer in the last twenty seconds.
Krista has a hand on her forehead. Veronica is nervously sucking Diet Coke through a straw. The third girl—I forgot her name—might actually be filing her nails?
Hugo is leaning nervously over Carlos’s shoulder.
“That is…,” DeSantos begins.
No one at our table dares to move until they continue with:
“One thousand percent CORRECT!”
An eruption of applause, whistles, and stomps ensues.
Popcorn is flying. Audra is high-fiving Diya.
Cash and Izaac are kissing. And in an instant, before I can even realize what’s happening, Eve turns and hugs me.
Really hugs me. In a way that feels joyful and light and unburdened and about something more than just a fruitcake crown.
And then I’m hugging her back, because obviously, and she smells like cinnamon and vanilla and there’s confetti and definitely sparkles and oh my god I want to put my face on her face so bad.
But I don’t even have to work hard to remain chill, because although it’s pure chaos all around us, it feels like we’re the only ones in the room.
And somehow, despite that we’ve never done this before, and I’ve never been this close to someone I so badly want to kiss, it’s totally, completely… natural.
My whole body thrums with the energy of the crowd, and also the yearning for everyone around us to disappear, if only for a moment.
“Hugo!” she says finally, and it’s a shout, but it’s also a whisper—only to me. “You got him to speak! I can’t believe it!”
“I didn’t do anything!” I reply with the same amplified intimacy. “He already had the answer! I just left some space so we could hear him.”
“Thank you,” she says. “Thank you… so much.” She pulls back a little now and looks out into the crowd. She shields her eyes from the spotlights. “Where is he? Did you see where he went?”
I crane my neck.