CHAPTER 3 #3
“Don’t.” I close my eyes, fighting against the seductive temptation to fall apart.
“Don’t even think about apologizing to me because I can read the horror on your face.
Now you think maybe you fucked up on this one.
” I give him a droll look, and I swear the tips of his ears turn pink.
“Let me assure you, you did. I warned you, but you kept sipping poison while telling yourself it was honey. That’s on you.
I don’t want your apologies because you didn’t hesitate to judge me and decide you knew the whole story.
She knew just how to manipulate you; believing her is on you too.
Don’t involve me in your bullshit anymore.
No more snide comments,” my words land like a warning.
Playboy swallows hard and nods. I glance around, making sure I’m not the only one seeing this. I’m not. Most people are looking at me with pride. If only that was enough.
“No more jeering insults,” I keep going, laying my demands at his feet. He nods and I breathe a little easier. “I don’t want to hear your voice, I don’t want to even see you,” my eyes narrow at him, wanting him to understand just how serious I am.
“I hate confrontation,” I mutter to myself and look at the floor while rubbing my forehead. “Fuck,” I curse under my breath.
When I look back up at Playboy, for a moment I think he’s going to reach for me. I take a step back without even thinking about it.
“As much as I want to take Vanessa and leave right now, I’m so pissed and so close to losing the last bit of control I have preventing me from strangling my sister and then you, I can’t drive,” my voice comes out far whinier than I want it to, but I’m past caring.
I’m past being done.
My stomach is in knots, and my entire body feels too damn hot. It feels like I could literally lift off the ground and launch into orbit using my anger and hurt as fuel.
Rumble, in all his gruff glory, steps in next to me. He gives me a soft smile before shooting a murderous glare at his son. “I figured beer would be out of the question now. How about lemonade,” he offers me a glass, and I take it with a grateful look on my face.
I drink most of the glass without stopping, breathing, or looking around. “Thank you,” I whisper to him before turning toward Vanessa. My eyes fill with unshed tears as I choke out, “I’m sorry I just told everyone that, are you okay?”
Her smile is bright and filled with ten years of memories, ones only she and I have.
There’s a weight to her words, an importance, “I’m okay, Mama.
It’s all just facts to me and facts can’t hurt you,” she uses my own words on me.
How many times have I said the same thing to her?
“You never hid anything from me, and you were always honest about who you are, while loving me and giving me a home.”
My shoulders relax a little more. She’s okay. Her wounds aren’t raw like mine.
I turn toward Opal and struggle to keep my voice level, “Is there somewhere I can go to calm down. I just need a few minutes and then we’ll leave.”
“I can take you to my room,” Playboy offers while pulling a keyring out of his pocket.
My lip curls up in a sneer as I look him up and down. There are so many reasons why I would never say yes to that offer, the least of which being that I have no idea what I would find on his sheets. No fucking thank you. Gross.
Ryker steps closer, his hand landing on my shoulder with a comforting touch. “I’ll take you to my office. You’ll be able to cool down and take a moment to yourself.”
I nod and look toward Vanessa, but Graycie and Vera are already there, wrapping her up in their arms. There’s no doubt in my mind that she’ll be safe with them.
Just as Ryker starts to lead me away, Vanessa rushes toward me. She wraps her arms around me, her little voice coming out muffled against my shirt as she whispers, “He seemed nice sometimes.”
My fingers glide through her hair while I keep my voice low, “Sometimes things aren’t as they seem. It’s a lesson you learn when you’re young, but adults forget things all the time.”
As Vanessa lets me go, I shoot Playboy one more scathing look. Devastation is written all over his face. Too little, too late.
I barely register anything as Ryker leads me to his office. The moment I’m inside, I break. Tears stream down my cheeks and I press a hand to my mouth to stop the sound of my sobbing.
“I’m sorry,” Ryker’s deep voice is filled with sorrow and something else, something like respect. “Nothing I say will make what my brother has done okay. His behavior towards you surprised all of us because that’s not the guy he usually is.”
He pauses and when I look at him, my cheeks coated in tears and my eyes turning red, his entire face softens.
“It doesn’t make it okay, but his birth mother was a club whore who tried to trap Rumble with a pregnancy and use it as leverage to become his Old Lady.
She never got the patch or the recognition from Rumble.
She got hooked on drugs and ended up overdosing without ever being part of his life. ”
My eyes close as the pain of his past hits me, even though I don’t want it to.
“That doesn’t make it okay,” my words are rough and filled with pain.
“No,” Ryker agrees while heading toward the door, “it doesn’t.”
The sound of the door closing behind him is loud in the room, but I welcome it. I just need a few minutes and then I’m taking my daughter home.
No more clubhouse. No more motorcycle club. No more Lola.
Most importantly, no more Playboy.