Chapter 28
twenty-eight
I haven’t stopped crying since I left Brian’s apartment. Even though I know this is the right decision, it doesn’t erase the pain of saying goodbye to the person you’ve loved for five years. The one you thought you’d spend a lifetime with.
Thankfully, it’s a short drive to my condo, where I plan to crash for the night before heading back to Southmount tomorrow.
There’s no way I could make the hours-long drive back with all the emotional turmoil I’ve been through today.
Talk about irony—ending my engagement on the same day as my engagement party.
I sigh loudly, realizing how much I’ve added to my plate by canceling the wedding: all the vendors I’ll need to contact, the gifts I’ll have to return.
It’s a small price to pay for standing up for myself and demanding to be treated how I deserve.
With trembling hands, I work to unlock the door to the condo. Only a few more seconds until I’m inside and can release the debilitating pain I’m feeling. Process the grief of ending my first-ever relationship and deal with the worry I have about ending up alone.
When the door swings open, a sense of relief washes over me, knowing I’m in a safe space and can let out everything I’m feeling without any repercussions.
“Oh my God!” Chelsi screams, jumping into the air and throwing her phone in my direction. “Holy shit, Kate! You scared the fuck out of me.” Her hand flies to her chest as she bends over, trying to catch her breath and still her pounding heart. “What are you doing here?”
“I broke up with Brian,” I croak, tossing my keys onto the counter and closing the door. “Ended our engagement. Our relationship. It’s all over.” A sob escapes my chest, my balance wavering as I slide down the closed door until I hit the floor.
“Oh, Kate,” she murmurs, rushing to my side, wrapping her arms tightly around me. “It’s going to be okay. It may not feel that way, but I promise you, it will get better.”
Chelsi sits next to me, her arm around me as I weep for what I’ve lost. She doesn’t say a word, just rubs my shoulder slowly to comfort me while I let out all the emotions I’ve kept in for so long.
There were so many red flags I ignored because I was desperate to find someone to love me.
Someone who wanted me in their life and wouldn’t leave.
Well, the joke’s on me because I was at the bottom of Brian’s priority list.
“I need wine and cheese,” I whisper, wiping away the tears soaking my face.
“That I can do,” Chelsi replies, standing and pulling me up alongside her. “Let’s get drunk and eat our weight in charcuterie.”
A small laugh bubbles out of me. My hand instinctively covers my mouth, unsure what might come out next, given the extreme range of emotions I’ve experienced in the last twenty-four hours.
Chelsi heads to the kitchen to put together our adult version of Lunchables while I splash cold water on my face in the bathroom, choosing to ignore my puffy eyes and cheeks.
I glance at my phone to see a flurry of missed calls and texts from Jake.
Apparently, he freaked out when he brought over dinner and I wasn’t there.
It didn’t help that I turned off my notifications on the drive up.
I fire off a quick text, letting him know I’m in Chicago, and that I’ll be back in the morning.
Three dots flicker on and off as he likely types a message and deletes it before hitting send.
This happens for a couple of minutes before he finally sends a thumbs-up emoji reaction.
“Wine time,” Chelsi calls out from the living room.
I collapse onto the couch, draping a blanket over my legs and taking the extremely large measure of wine from Chelsi. “Bottoms up,” I say, clinking my glass to hers.
We spend the next hour rehashing everything that happened with Brian in the last month, including tonight’s conversation.
Although I’ve told Chelsi about almost all of it before, I have a new appreciation for how bad things had gotten by the time we’re done talking.
The lack of respect for my feelings. The failure to prioritize my needs. The recurring flower apology.
“I never want to see another fucking red carnation again,” I say, taking a swig from my third glass of the night.
Chelsi grimaces. “Umm…have you forgotten about the shit ton of red carnations in your living room? The tune of twelve dozen?”
“Fuck my life,” I groan, dragging a hand down my face.
“Unlock your phone and give it to me,” Chelsi demands, gesturing at me to hurry up.
I’m past the point of asking questions, so I do as she says.
Chelsi furiously types away, a sly smile growing across her face. “Done. No more red carnations.”
“How did you—” My brow scrunches as my brain attempts to figure out what she could’ve possibly done. The combo of emotional devastation, wine, and a late night makes it impossible for my brain to come up with a logical answer.
Chelsi hands me back my phone. “Jake’s taking care of it. I also told him to move your engagement presents to his house. I don’t think you’d want to see those, either.”
I gulp and nod as tears brim in my eyes once again.
“No. No more crying over that asshole,” Chelsi demands, shaking her head. “He’s not worth your tears.”
“I’m done crying over Brian, at least for now. I’m grateful for you. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” I lean forward, wrapping my arms around her neck, my wine glass still in hand. “All I need is you. You and Jake. My two best friends.”