21. Cedrick
My fingers turn into a metal claw around my phone. There”s no mistaking the message from Liza.
Ellie fainted at the fundraiser. She was rushed to Queen Amaranta Hospital. She wasn”t looking too good the whole time.
All my senses kick into action like a cloud of exhaust. I storm out of work without an explanation or second thought. The whole drive to the hospital one hand stays firmly on the steering wheel, while the other hand alternates between hanging out the window and running through my hair.
Panic and worry take turns taunting me.
“Please let her be okay.”
I wonder if this could be something serious. I know the expression that when a doctor hears hooves, he should assume it’s horses, not zebras. But still. I’ve been in medicine long enough to know that it’s not always nothing.
I try to call her, but, unsurprisingly, no one picks up.
“Ellie Lawson,” I state at the front desk.
“Right this way, Prince Cedrick.” A nurse plucks me from reception and rushes me to her room, giving me a rundown that concludes with the fact that they”re still finishing running some tests.
Ellie”s on the bed when I step into the room, still as a block of ice. Her eyes are shut, and there”s a blanket up to her chest. My very own sleeping beauty.
“Ellie?” I shut the door with my foot and walk to her side.
Quiet.
She”s hooked up to an IV, and only the sporadic drops of liquid can be heard in the room.
Her beautiful face is blank, sunken around the eyes and hollow in the cheeks. I look around the room and begin to pace from the bed to the door and back.
A mix of fear, sadness, and hope flickers through my veins. She’ll be fine, it”s only stress, says one line of thought.
Why weren”t you with her? This could have been avoided,goes another.
What if you never see her again?
Shut up, Cedrick. Be a doctor, not an idiot.
My eyes bore into her. I long for her hazel ones to open and stare back at me. I stroke the side of her face with my fingers.
“Can you hear me?” I ask.
“I can, but I don’t think you’re asking me.” I look up, and Liza saunters in. “Sorry, had to step out for a moment to call Ishmael. He should be here soon.”
I nod, then turn back to Ellie.
“You really care about her, don’t you?” Liza says, smiling. “She’ll be okay.”
“I hope so.”
I don”t know how long I stand there with my fingers against her skin. But when her eyelids do eventually flutter open, it seems like the end of a lifetime of waiting.
My shoulders slacken, as if a weight has been lifted. At the same time, I feel a strong internal punch in my chest.
“You”re awake.”
Her expression is blank, but she eyes me curiously. Her eyes narrow as she takes me in. I immediately recognize that I”m way too close for comfort. I clear my throat and step back.
There”s no denying the awkward energy between us. Our eyes stay locked for a long minute. I”m unsure of what to say or what she thinks of waking up to me hunched over her, stroking her face.
“The benefit…” she whispers.
I stand with my hands folded behind my back. “Is probably over by now. You”re in the hospital.”
“Oh.” Her eyes flicker around the room, stopping at Liza. “I’m sorry I made you leave.”
“You didn’t make me do anything. I wanted to come with you. Are you kidding?”
Ellie’s eyes then come back to search my face, as if Liza isn’t in the same room. The air between us is a heavy bubble.
I”m contemplating how to address the intensity of emotions between us when the door bursts open. The moment is lost.
Both our eyes fly to the doctor, who walks in and sits on a stool.
“Glad to see you”re awake,” he says and flips through a chart. Then he feels her forehead. “No fever. Good sign.”
He starts to scribble something on the chart. My gut clenches as we await the verdict, and my eyes lock on Ellie’s face.
“I”m sure today has been a bit of a scare. But I have some good news.” He pauses dramatically, and we look at him, waiting for him to speak. “Ellie, my dear. You’re pregnant.”
The world screeches to a stop as the words begin to register.
Ellie looks like she’s been brought back from the brink by defibrillator paddles.
How the hell am I supposed to react after everything happening? And so much uncertainty? And such strong feelings for Ellie?
“I don”t believe it,” Ellie says.
A smile spreads on her lips. She dabs her fingers on her eyes, but they overflow.
“We did it.” I graze her cheek with one hand while my other one finds hers and grips her fingers.
Her grip on me is deathly. Surprisingly strong for someone who was passed out moments ago.
“No wonder I’ve felt so terrible. It makes sense, but it never clicked. I stopped taking the tests because I was too demoralized seeing them come up negative.”
I wish she would have told me she wasn’t feeling well.
“Well, now we know why, I guess,” I respond.
Her smile drops a notch as she catches the edge in my tone. She lets her fingers slip from mine. A shadow of sadness passes over her face. I see the same fears and uncertainties I feel written across it.
The doctor senses our expressions. “Naturally, you”ll have a lot of questions as new parents. Even health professionals like you will find it”s very different on the patient end of things.” He gives a small laugh.
Oh, I definitely have a lot of questions. Chief amongst them is how much will pregnancy complicate our already complicated scenario. The doctor seems to read my mind.
“Dad, you now have one job. And that’s to take care of Mom.”
I move closer to her and reach for her hand so we look like a united front. My first chance to practice the advice the doctor just gave me. At the same moment, she puts that very hand on her belly.
I hope it’s not a sign.
The door bursts open, and I’m grateful for the interruption in the awkwardness. But then my brothers and their wives pile in, and I know the awkwardness is just beginning.
“What are you all doing here?” I ask, genuinely shocked.
“We wanted to make sure you were doing okay, Ellie, after you collapsed. Are you feeling better?” It’s Vivienne, Caesar’s wife, who was at the event.
“A little. Especially since we know the reason I was feeling so faint.”
The room gives questioning looks, and Ellie and I both smile. She answers by putting her hand to her belly, and I proudly gesture toward the now-invisible bump that could start showing before we know it.
My sisters-in-law all erupt in squeals, and my brothers give me grins and thumbs-up.
“Welcome to Team Parenthood, bro,” Ishmael says with a clap on the back.
Everyone follows with hugs and congratulations. I”m amazed at how fast the news has spread.
“Thank you for the warm welcome.” I smile as Liza pats my shoulder.
But inside I”m not so confident. I’m exuberant, sure. But now I’m beset with even more uncertainty. Will this bring us closer or further apart?