Chapter 31
The motel shower wasn’t big enough for both of us, so after taking turns in the bathroom, we’re in the other clean bed, snuggled up, relishing being together again.
My head rests on her chest, listening to the comforting thump, thump, thump of her heart as her fingers gently twist a strand of my hair over and over.
All the emotions from the day crash through me at once, and tears spring to my eyes. I try to hold them back, try to keep them from falling, because I don’t want to ruin the peacefulness surrounding us.
Watching Addison race was nerve-racking. I’ve watched barrel racing before, but knowing it was her first time after so long had my stomach in a knot. She was beautiful out there, her face fixed into a determined scowl, her body following every move Athena made.
When her run was over, I didn't think twice before rushing out of the stands and seeking out her familiar truck and trailer. I had a whole speech planned, but everything I’d memorized evaporated when I saw her up close after so long. I’m surprised I was able to speak at all.
Thankfully, she didn’t reject me. I’d prepared for that scenario with Colleen, just in case, but nothing could have made me ready for the wave of relief that washed over me when she told me she hadn’t moved on.
It’s useless to try to hold my tears at bay. One slips down, landing on her skin.
Addison’s body immediately tenses, and she sits up, concern painted all over her face. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m overwhelmed with everything. They’re mostly happy tears, I promise. I just—” I let out a shaky breath. “I don’t know where we go from here. I was going to wait until tomorrow to talk to you, but I’m antsy.”
“It’s okay to be overwhelmed. It’s been a whirlwind of a day for both of us. You can talk to me now, if that’ll help ease some of your anxiety.”
I sit up, using the sheet to cover my body. I probably shouldn’t be talking business in my birthday suit, but desperate times, I guess.
“Let me preface by saying, I know you love traveling and competing, and I’d never ask you to give that up.
Like I said earlier, I can’t promise I’ll be able to come with you to every event, but I’ll try to make it to as many as I can.
” I clear my throat. “Daddy came to me last month with plans to build an indoor arena. He’s working on the permits now, and by next spring, he hopes to have it completed and ready to open as a training facility.
“He was hoping—we were hoping—you’d agree to come teach barrel racing and riding lessons when it’s completed. We haven’t fleshed out a salary or—”
“Yes.”
“I haven’t even finished my spiel.”
“Juniper, you could pay me ten cents an hour and I’d still agree.
I’ve been doing a lot of thinking while training Athena, and I’ve realized that, while yes, I’ll always love barrel racing, there are more important things in life.
My goals have changed. Maybe I’ll enter some rodeos for the hell of it, but I don’t want to do it forever.
I loved teaching the riders over the summer and helping the kids when I was back in Nevada.
I was planning to look at jobs around Copper Creek so I could be closer to you.
These past seven months have given me the opportunity to think about what I really want. ”
“What do you really want?” I want to hear it laid out for me. I need to know she’s not saying this just because of me or my anxiety.
“I want to teach. I love watching the moment something clicks and they find their stride. I want to wake up and have coffee with you in the mornings, then listen to you talk about your day after dinner. I want to watch you paint and hold your hand through the good and the bad days. I want to take you out dancing at The Mule and get to know your friends better. I want to put a ring on your finger and say our vows among the wildflowers.”
“And… you’re sure you’re not just saying all this because of my anxiety? You’re not giving it up for me?”
“I’m not giving it up for you. I’m doing it because I’m selfish, and I want as many moments with you as I can get. You’re going to be so sick of me because now that I have you, there’s no chance I’m going anywhere again unless you come with me.”
A fresh set of happy, relieved tears flows down my cheeks as I lean in and press a kiss to her lips. I have no words for how much her assurances mean, and for the first time in a while, my heart feels heavy from joy instead of sadness.
My stomach growls, ruining the tender moment, which makes Addison chuckle.
“Come on, let’s get some food in you, and you can catch me up on everything I’ve missed.”
As we dress, I fill her in on the small things that’ve happened. Once we get our food, I spill the big things about Briar and Oakley’s relationship and everything that transpired over the winter.
I thought for sure Oakley would have reached out to Addison at some point, and Addison admits that she did, but it was too painful to talk to her because of me.
“I hope Oakley’s not mad at me,” Addison says. “It sounds like she might’ve been too busy to notice, but I’ll apologize tomorrow when we get back.”
I blink at her, my burrito paused halfway to my mouth. “Tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow… when I drive us home?”
“I thought you’d go back to Nevada and pack or maybe stay there for the rest of the season, and we’d… do long distance until you moved back when the arena is finished."
“What part of ‘now that I have you, there’s no chance I’m going anywhere again unless you come with me,’ implied I’d want to spend another second away from you?”
“But what about your things? What about competing?”
“I can buy new clothes, and when you’re ready, we can make the trip to get the rest of my stuff. As for competing, I wasn’t planning on doing very many this season, anyway.”
She shrugs as if it’s not a big deal. Like this change of plans isn’t major.
I guess to some people, a change like this isn’t monumental. Not everyone has the same type of worries about moving as I do. She’s uprooting her life—something I don’t think I could do—and she’s barely batting an eye.
Instead of asking if she’s sure again, I remind myself that Addison is her own person.
I’m not forcing her into this. If she wanted to travel the country and compete, we’d make it work.
The steadiness in her voice and the lax way she’s holding herself tell me this is a decision she’s confident in, and I’m not about to argue with her about it.
“I guess I’d better tell Shiloh and Cillian I won’t need a ride home tomorrow. Oh! And I’ll need to tell Daddy to get Athena’s stall ready.”
I shoot both of them a text. Daddy might be sleeping already, but he’ll see it in the morning. Shiloh sends the party face emoji and tells me she’s happy for me. I feel bad for making her and Cillian drive all this way. I’ll make it up to them by buying them a round of drinks sometime.
When we get back to the motel, we’re both exhausted from the events of the day, and we fall asleep wrapped around each other before ten.
For the first time in seven months, I don’t have any nightmares.
As we roll under the sign welcoming us to Forget Me Not Ranch, it feels like taking a breath of fresh air.
Home.
I’m home, with the love of my life beside me, and she’s staying.
“God, I’ve missed it here,” Addison whispers reverently as she parks her truck. She brings our hands—which have been locked together basically the entire drive—up to her lips and presses a gentle kiss to my knuckles. “It’s good to be back.”
“It’s good to have you back.” The front door of the main house slams open, and my best buddy bursts out, followed by the rest of my family.
I hop out of the truck just as Hudson barrels into my legs. “Juni! You back.”
“I am, and I brought a friend with me. Can you say hi to Addison?”
Hudson shyly waves, and Addison gives him a soft smile. “Hi, buddy. I heard you like horses. Do you want to meet mine? Her name is Athena.”
At the mention of his favorite animal, Hudson perks up, grabbing Addison’s hand and dragging her around to the back of the trailer. Oakley follows, already chatting her ear off, catching her up on everything happening.
Briar slides up next to me and puts an arm around my shoulder. “She staying?”
“Yep.”
“For how long?”
“Forever, if I can help it. She’s agreed to help with the training facility, and she says she wants to slow down on the competitions. We haven’t worked out everything yet.”
“It’ll take some time, but I’m glad you got your girl. Look at us, settling down like Mama wanted. Now she’ll be begging for more grandkids.”
I pat her arm. “That’s all on you and Oakley, I’m afraid.”
“We’ll certainly have fun practicing, even if nothing comes of it.”
“Ew.”
“Briar Calhoun, have some class.” Mama taps her arm before wrapping me in a hug. “I’m so proud of you, Juni. And so happy for you. You already seem lighter. Happier.”
Addison cracks a smile and gets down on Hudson’s level to answer whatever question he’s asking, and my heart is fit to burst with joy.
I know we don’t have all the answers, and I’m sure life won’t always be easy sailing.
I’ll still have bad days, and I’ll have different hurdles to jump over, but I know I’ll always have the best support system by my side, holding my hand through it all.
“I am. And I think this is just the beginning.”