Chapter 22
twenty-two
. . .
Eden
Here I am sitting in yet another office for another meeting. This time the insurance company. It’s never ending.
No building should smell this aggressively of coffee and carpet cleaner. The combination is turning my stomach. And yet, here I am.
It’s already January fourth and I still can’t bring myself to take the Christmas tree down.
I’m not sure I ever will, and somehow, I’m still moving forward.
I put my foot down with Kris about New Years and opted to stay in and watch a marathon of old movies with Felix. I just wasn’t up for celebrating.
But the world still spins, and today my life is a list of claim numbers.
I’m trying not to think about the fact that I used to overhear my parents discussing deductibles, interest rates, and taxes.
Those are adult things. Things I never expected to have to understand at nineteen. Was I sheltered? Maybe. I don’t know.
Felix reaches over and grips my thigh.
“Eden…are you okay?”
I glance sideways and take a deep breath. He’s taken the day off work to be here with me. That sounds dramatic until I remember that he works for himself and can kind of do whatever he wants.
Still, the fact that he came makes my chest all warm and fuzzy. He’s been part of all the big things since my parents died, and it feels normal having him here.
“Yeah.”
His eyes narrow.
“I’m not buying it,” he whispers.
Before I can answer, a woman appears in the doorway.
“Eden Hale?”
I stand, and Felix stands with me. Even though I’m getting steadier by the day, he still keeps his hand on my lower back.
The woman smiles kindly.
“Hi Eden, I’m Michelle. Come on back.”
Michelle’s office is painfully normal. Beige walls, a bookcase, a single fake plant, one desk, three chairs, and that’s it, other than her computer and printer.
Michelle settles behind the desk, and we sit across from her.
“First off, I want to say I’m very sorry for your loss.”
My throat constricts, and she waits a second before continuing.
“Today we’ll review your parents’ policies and explain your next steps.”
I nod. That’s what an adult is supposed to do, but I feel totally unqualified for this conversation.
She pushes a folder across the desk and opens it for me to look at the paperwork.
“The home itself had an insurance policy for the remaining portion of the mortgage.”
My stomach twists. Okay…good…I guess.
“Put simply, your parents thought ahead and took out insurance on the house just in case something ever happened to them. It means that, in the event of their death, the remainder of the mortgage will be paid. You own it free and clear.”
Relief and disappointment flood my system all at once. Some part of me expected the universe to keep taking. Taking everything and forcing me to move, live on the street, or couch surf until…I can get a job and get my life sorted.
Michelle keeps talking.
“As for the car.” I swallow hard and picture my parents’ car.
Not just the accident but the road trips and smiles. Felix rubs his thumb over the back of my hand as if sensing my distress.
“The adjuster has designated it a total loss. We will cut you a check for the vehicle’s market value. That is this paperwork.” She moves some papers and taps a pile. “They also had life insurance,” she continues, but focusing is tougher with each word she says.
Ownership of the house. Car handled. My parents’ lives reduced to a check. Just the flick of a pen and turn of a page. I hate this. It should be a huge relief, but there is no relief in my parents planning for after their death.
Michelle lowers her voice.
“I know this can’t be easy.”
This is a lot to take in, and my mind is not functioning properly.
I don’t want things replaced. I want my parents. But grief doesn’t care about schedules. I need to sign papers, make calls, cancel subscriptions. It’s an endless loop of one reminder after another.
Eventually the meeting ends, and Michelle gives me copies of the paperwork in a plain brown envelope.
The second we get outside, I start crying. Not loud, broken sobs like before. Just me, standing beside Felix in the parking lot, with tears running down my face.
He wraps me in his arms.
“It’s going to be okay. You did amazing in there.”
I laugh weakly.
“They’re fixing everything. Even from the grave, they are taking my hand and leading me along to ensure I’m safe. It’s breaking my heart all over again. They loved me so much, and even though my love hasn’t faded in their absence, all I can think is that I could’ve been a better daughter.”
His expression softens.
“Stop. If there is one thing I’ve learned from watching you go through all of this, it’s that your parents wouldn’t want you thinking like that.”
I wipe my eyes.
He’s calm and gentle as if he fully understands. I think of the parallels in our lives and realize that he really does. Felix knows better than anyone else what I’m feeling.
“I know, but my brain still goes there,” I say as he steps back, keeping his hands on my shoulders. I stare down at the folder. “I don’t know what to do now.”
Felix watches me quietly, then unexpectedly he says, “Coffee?”
I blink.
“What?”
He points down the street.
“You need coffee.”
That startles a laugh out of me.
“Doctor’s orders?”
“No.” His mouth twitches. “My orders.”
Felix brushes his lips over mine, and I tremble.
“Drink it for me, Pretty Thing. Say yes.” He nips my bottom lip making me audibly gasp. Felix smirks.
“Yes,” I whisper, unable to deny him even if I want to.
“Good girl.”
Five minutes later I’m holding a ridiculously large coffee and an entire bag of chocolate croissants. I expect Felix to drive home, but he turns left, instead of right.
I look over at him.
“Where are we going?”
Felix shrugs.
“You’re being all mysterious.”
“And? A guy has to keep the woman in his life on her toes. You know to keep things interesting and exciting,” he says.
It comes out as a joke, but my stomach clenches, and butterflies take flight at the words, woman in his life.
He glances at me and smiles, then his are back on the road.
“Fine, I’ll tell you. How can I resist that face? I figured if it was me…” His voice softens as he gives a little shrug. “…I’d want my people.”
“What?”
“You’ll see.”
Not even ten minutes go by before we pull into Kris and Kyle’s apartment building. We park, and I just stare at him, trying to find the right words and tell him what this means to me. He saves me and grabs my hand instead.
“I will do anything for you, Eden. I hope you know that,” he says, lifting my fingers to his mouth. A tiny jolt of excitement races down my spine at the gesture. “Let’s go see your friends.”
I blink at him.
“You’re coming too?”
He nods once.
“I know how important Kris and Kyle are to you, and I want to make an effort to get to know them. If that’s what you want, of course?”
Emotion hits me like a tidal wave, stealing the air from my lungs. After everything they’ve done and said about Felix, he still brings me here because he knows I need to see my friends.
I smile before I can stop myself. This is what they don’t understand. Felix gets me. He notices things before I say them. He knows I don’t need fixing. I just need to be with the people I care about most.
I lean across the console and kiss his cheek, and his eyes close briefly.
“Thank you,” I whisper, loving how his eyes shine back at me. He really gets me.
I go to get out, but stop with my hand on the door when a thought occurs to me.
“Felix? How do you know where they live?”
He grabs his phone and holds out the social media post of Kris standing in front of her new place. The building and the address on the front are in the background.
“I wanted to surprise you, so I had to go snooping.”
He smiles wide like it’s a conspiracy.
“So, you’re not a stalker?” I tease, and he laughs.
“There’s only one girl I want to stalk,” he says, biting his lip ring. “And I’m looking at her.”
And just like that, my mind veers off course as he scrambles my brain. Are we sure it’s not illegal to be this sexy?
Clearing my throat, I nod, and he gives me a wicked grin before getting out.
Holy-Freaking-Hotness.
I try to get my heart under control as he rounds the front of the car. This guy is going to kill me.